


Lost Hearts

by CliffordAffliction



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: AU, American Football, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Ashton is the football captain, Blowjobs, Bottom!Calum, Boys In Love, Calum also wears make up, Calum is the outcast, Calum is very sad, Footballplayer!Ashton, High School, High School AU, I suppose, Jealousy, Lots of it, Luke is the nerd I guess, M/M, Mashlum, Masturbation, Michael is the badboy, OT3, OT4, Original Female Character(s) - Freeform, Pining, Polyamory, School, Shower Sex, Skype Sex, Smut, Top!Michael, Unrequited Love, alternative universe, and scotty is the scotty from that scotty doesn't know song, badboy!Michael, bottom!Ashton, bottom!Luke, cause I'm really proud of it so far, handjobs, he just wants to always look pretty, he's actually pretty sweet though, he's just really smart and is involved in a bunch of school activities, he's not the bad guy for once wow, i hope its not, i really love ashton's character in this, idk - Freeform, if you want him to be, im so proud of myself, im sorry, im sorry if this fic is confusing, is that a thing?, its Ashton's girlfriend but she sucks and ash gets rid of her fast, lots of mashlum, makeup!Calum, nerd!luke, of course, outcast!Calum, sad!calum, so much pining its embarrassing, surprise suprise, there's one, top!ashton, what even is this fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-20
Updated: 2016-07-07
Packaged: 2018-05-21 23:53:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 81
Words: 177,503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6062857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CliffordAffliction/pseuds/CliffordAffliction
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ashton, Luke, Calum and Michael live in four different worlds in high school and each one of them is in love with someone who loves someone else. This can't possibly end well...or can it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Calum

**Author's Note:**

> Wow I'm so shit at summaries but basically they're all stuck in this love square where each of them loves someone who loves someone else. I got this idea from She's The Man because like Viola likes Duke but Duke likes Olivia and Olivia likes Sebastian etc...I'm sure you get the gist of what this fic will be about now (if not just drop me a comment). The chapters will be fairly short just because each chapter is from a different boys view. I have 10k written on this so far and I know I shouldn't be starting a new fic when Catch Me If You Can isn't finished but I promise I'll finish it. This story is just coming very easy to me right now and I had to get all of my ideas out before I lost it all. Anyways let me know if you like this and I will continue posting chapters :) Follow me on [Tumblr](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/) if you want!

Calum carefully applied the mascara to his upper lashes and batted his eyes in front of the mirror a couple of times before working on his lower lashes. As soon as he felt happy with his lashes he moved on to putting a light pink color of lipstick, it wasn’t too extravagant but it was obvious that he was wearing lipstick, and then he put some pink eye shadow on as well. Usually Calum never put on anything more than some mascara but today was a special day.

It was Friday which meant the game was today and Calum just knew Michael would be there. Sometimes he felt stupid for doing all of this just to impress Michael but the boy just meant so much to him and Calum would do anything for his attention. Unfortunately Michael hadn’t gave him attention since 10th grade when he dropped all of his books onto the floor and Michael looked down at him and shook his head before continuing to walk down the hallway. Sure it wasn’t exactly good attention but Calum just took whatever he could get. It wasn’t like Calum felt like Michael hated him; it just felt like he was irrelevant to him. Late at night when he had way too much free time to think it would get to him that most; the fact that Michael doesn’t want anything to do with him. Whenever he was around Michael he was fine but as soon as Michael was gone he felt like his life didn’t even have a purpose. Calum knew this kind of thinking was toxic but he just couldn’t stop it.

Calum glanced at his phone and seen that the game started in a little over 30 mintues then he jogged down the stairs. He was wearing light washed blue jeans with his white vans and a peach colored sweater. It was very rare that Calum felt good about himself but tonight he actually felt like he looked cute. All he could do was hope that for once Michael would take a double look at him. Even if he couldn’t get anymore than that he knows that would get him by for a couple of weeks and all he would be doing was smiling just thinking about how Michael actually noticed him for the first time in two years. Usually Michael wasn’t the one to go to football games but Calum had overheard (He totally wasn’t eavesdropping or anything) him telling one of his friends that he was going to the game tonight. Calum really wasn’t sure why Michael had decided to go but he didn’t question it. He was just so happy that he was getting a chance to see Michael outside of school for once. Luckily Calum lived very close to the school or else he wouldn’t be able to go to this game tonight (he didn’t have a car and he didn’t exactly have friends to catch a ride from either).

It was a bit chilly as he stepped outside and he wrapped the sleeves of his sweater around his hands before sticking them in his pockets for even further warmth. He practically skipped all the way to the school grounds with how excited he was and he just hoped that things would actually go the way he imaged they would. Every night before he would fall asleep he would imagine how his day at school would go the next day. Usually he would imagine simple things like Michael smiling at him in the hallways or Michael getting paired up with him in Chemistry (it was the only class they had together) and then they would become friends. Even though they were very likely things to happen to other people with crushes Calum knew they would never happen to him.

Seeing Michael everyday at school but not getting to talk to him was like standing on your tippy toes to reach a glass up in the cupboard but always falling just short of it. Michael was so close to him but he could never reach him and it killed Calum more than anyone would ever know. Mainly because Calum would never tell anyone and also because he knew no one ever paid attention to him but he never wanted attention from any of the asshole’s he went to school with; he just wanted attention from Michael.

*

Calum instantly started to regret the decision of coming to the game when he remembered why he hasn’t come to a game since freshman year. The game hadn’t even started yet but the crowds of people in the bleachers were going crazy and there were kids running every which way with black and gold paint all over their faces. Calum wasn’t good with crowds especially when kids from school were involved. He knew he wasn’t liked and he also knew most people weren’t even aware of his existence; he honestly didn’t know which one was worse.

For some reason people started to clear out a little and Calum decided to go stand in line at the concessions to get a cup of hot chocolate. Hopefully it would warm him up and that would be one less thing to worry about. Calum got cold very easily and it got quite annoying when where they lived wasn’t exactly warm all year round. A few kids pushed past him on their way to the bathroom and Calum tried not to let it bother him. He had only been here for 5 minutes but already he was being treated like shit; he guessed he should have expected it. He just had to tell himself that he would see Michael soon and everything would get better.

After Calum got his hot chocolate he started making his way towards the stands and got that nervous feeling as he walked in front of everyone and looked for an empty seat. It reminded him of when he used to have to ride the bus and he would have to search for a seat, just hoping that he could find a seat that he didn’t have to share with someone. He finally found a seat near where the band was playing and knew the music might scare the shit out of him a few times but at least he didn’t have to squeeze past a bunch of people if he needed to leave the bleachers in a hurry, like if he seen Michael. He sipped at his drink and scanned his eyes around a few times. He figured that Michael would show up late so he tried not to panic himself from not seeing him yet. Calum instead tried to calm down and just slumped down as he felt the warm liquid warm him up.


	2. Michael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Michael's up next :) (keep in mind that some chapters will be shorter or longer than others) Let me know what you think! Follow me on [Tumblr](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/) if you want :)

“Okay yes Connor has technique and he knows how to trick people out but he doesn’t have what Ashton has” Derek said getting heated but it just had Scotty scoffing.

“Okay enlighten me; what is it that Ashton has that Connor doesn’t” Scotty shot back at him and Michael just rolled his eyes as he was still not focusing on them. They were standing only a few feet off school grounds as Michael had a cigarette in his mouth. He had been eyeing the school parking lot for the last 10 minutes claiming that he wanted to have a few smokes before going to the game but that wasn’t the real reason he was waiting to go in.

“He has speed and football is all about speed” Derek practically yelled and it had Michael glaring at him as he blew smoke out of his nostrils.

“You’re fucking ridiculous; that’s not all it’s about” Scotty was then looking over at Michael “Michael who is the better player: Ashton or Connor?”

“Who gives a fuck” Michael said sharply as he still kept his eyes on the parking lot “Every single one of them has their head up their ass” that made Scotty and Derek chuckle a little.

“If you don’t like them then why the hell are we here, man?” Scotty said raising his eyebrows but Michael still didn’t pay attention to either one of them.

“It’s better than sitting in your house eating you mom’s shitty food” Michael used a dry tone like he couldn’t possibly be less interested in this conversation.

“I don’t know about that” Scotty disagreed “She was making lasagna tonight”

“Yeah it tastes like shit” Michael raised his voice a bit and finally made eye contact with Scotty. As soon as Michael looked back to the parking lot he spotted the person who he had been looking for the entire time. He felt himself smiling a bit and then looked over check and make sure that his friends didn’t see him because he knew he was blushing and smiling like a school girl with a crush. Luckily they were back to bickering about the football players and Michael looked back to the blond boy walking away from his car and almost tripping over the curb. Michael stopped himself from chuckling; the blond boy was always tripping over his own feet and Michael thought it was adorable “I’ll catch up with you guys later” Michael said over his shoulder and then was taking off before they could respond. He took a few more quick puffs of his cigarette then threw it to the ground before jogging over into the parking lot. He felt his stomach doing that weird flipping thing that only ever happened when he was around Luke and Michael actually hated that feeling; before he met Luke it had never happened so it made Michael feel not normal. Michael had to slow down a bit and realized that he was pretty out of shape (or just smoked too much) when he was already out of breath. From this distance he could see the blond boy wearing a flannel shirt with tight black jeans and Michael had to bite his lip when he let his yes linger downwards. He caught up with the boy and playfully bumped into him. It had obviously scared the boy as he jumped nearly sky high and Michael let out a laugh but Luke wasn’t as happy to see Michael; as usual.

“Are you trying to give me a heart attack?” Luke said in a sassy tone and Michael actually loved it.

“If you having a heart attack involves me having to give you mouth to mouth then yes” Michael smirked and Luke just shook his head before looking ahead at the field.

“Can you just leave me alone for 5 seconds?” Luke seemed genuinely upset this time and Michael did not like that “Jeez it’s like you’re everywhere I go”

“Well we do go to the same school. Sorry that my willingness to learn bugs you”

“Willingness to learn?” Luke squinted at him and Michael wanted to close the distance between them so badly. He doesn’t even know how long he’s wanted to feel Luke’s lips against his own but it’s felt like a lifetime “You barely even attend classes and if you do you spend most of it sleeping in the back”

“How do you know what I do?” Michael laughed and Luke glared at him “We literally have one class together”

“Yeah and you’re failing that class” Luke shot back at him but not making eye contact with him this time.

“Then tutor me” Michael said simply and in his head it sounded like such a good idea but he could tell by the look on Luke’s face that he wasn’t going to agree with it.

“The smartest person in the world couldn’t tutor you” Luke scoffed “The only reason you’re failing is because you’re so lazy and you don’t apply yourself”

“Jesus Christ, Hemmings you sound like my mom” Michael chuckled and watched as Luke paid to get into the game, clearly ignoring Michael. Michael did the same and handed over his money before catching back up to Luke.

“Are you just going to follow me around the whole night?” Luke snapped at him again and Michael backed up a bit “I don’t even know what you’re doing here anyways” Luke grumbled.

“Well what are you doing here?” Michael stepped in front of him and Luke briefly ran into his chest before backing up again. Michael tried not to let that little touch get to him “This isn’t exactly your scene either”

“Obviously” Luke held up the camera that was around his neck “I’m here to take photos for the yearbook”

“Is there a club that you aren’t involved in?” Michael didn’t mean it to sound snotty but he knew that Luke took it that way; Michael was just curious and liked learning stuff about the blond boy.

“I’m not involved in the chess club” Luke stuck up his nose a little and continued walking. He didn’t stop until he was at the fence right next to the field and in front of the middle of the bleachers.

“Well thank god cause that sounds fucking lame as hell” Michael let out a laugh and rested his arms on the top of the fence.

“Do you have to be here? Can’t you be elsewhere?” Luke was practically whining at this point but Michael didn’t give up that easily.

“Just go on one date with me. It’s as simple as that” Michael looked at him and their faces were only inches apart. He watched as Luke bit down at his lip and then almost seemed like he was forcing himself to look away. Luke let out a breath and shook his head. Michael felt himself deflating as he was being rejected once again.

“I’ve said ‘no’ to you a hundred times and that answer still stands” Luke said confidently and Michael had to look away from him.

“I’m pretty sure I haven’t asked you a hundred times” Michael scoffed.

“Yeah well that’s what It feels like” Luke mumbled and Michael tried not to let the hurt show on his face. He knew Luke seen him as this asshole that never took no for an answer but really it hurt him like hell every time Luke rejected him. He was never the type of person to have small crushes; he either fell for someone hard to the point where he needed to be with them or he didn’t have interest in anyone. Sure he had a few one night stands but it was only so he could temporarily not think about Luke. He always hated himself afterwards. Luke was the reason he drank too (again to forget about him temporarily) and Michael knew Luke was the reason he even showed up at school.

“If I don’t talk can I stand here with you?” Michael spoke more softly this time as he let his strong attitude float away for a little while.

“Fine” Luke said stubbornly but it had Michael smiling wide.


	3. Ashton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this chapter is short but that's why I'm doing a double update. Let me know how you like it! Follow me on [Tumblr](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/) if you want!

Ashton was sitting on the bench in the locker room with his elbows on his knees as he kept his eyes focused on the light brown tiles. He was driving himself crazy because tonight they were playing against the team that they hadn’t been able to beat in years. Ashton was the quarterback and team captain so of course if they lost this game he would feel like it was all his fault. Not to mention that his coach told him that there would be collage scouts in the stands and even thought Ashton had been offered a few collage scholarships none of them were from the collage that he really wanted to attend. He had wanted to go to Florida State ever since he could remember and he was determined to make it happen. He was currently the only one in the locker room after telling his coach he needed a few minutes to himself. His coach seemed a bit impatient but agreed to it none the less. Him being alone didn’t last long before Connor was popping his head through the locker room door.

“Ash you coming?” Ashton tried not to glare at him. All he needed was a few more minutes to himself and he feels like he would calm down but apparently that wasn’t going to happen “We’re heading out to the field” Ashton just simply nodded before putting his helmet on and his mouth guard and walking towards the door. He was surprised that the cold air actually calmed him down a bit but then that feeling was gone in an instant when they were already starting to walk in a line towards the field. As they got closer the bright lights above the field were starting to blind him and he had to look back down to the ground. The crowd was roaring as they stepped onto the field and Ashton refused to look up. It was bad enough to hear them but to actually see all those people watching him would make him feel like he was going to be sick. Usually he wasn’t this nervous, usually the games came easy to him, but there was just so much on the line here. His future literally depended on how he did during this game and Ashton swallowed down the lump in his throat. When the other team lined up across from them he was forced to take his eyes off the ground and look at the boy in front of him. The boy was quite a bit more stocky than Ashton and Ashton tried not to let that intimidate them. He had taken down kids that were way bigger than this guy. He looked up at the scoreboard and watched the two zero’s pop up in red and then he was looking back at the grass beneath him. He could do this.

  
*

The first play he gained a few yards but got tackled halfway down the field and right then Ashton couldn’t help glancing up at the bleachers. He could see people jumping up with their hands in the air in the way back, he could see the band playing loudly in their black and gold outfits. Sometimes Ashton couldn’t help but wish that he was up there instead of down here. Sometimes he just didn’t want to do this anymore and it all became a little too much for him. As he was still scanning the crowd he spotted three old men who had clipboards in their hands and Ashton knew straight away that those were the scouts. He felt like his knees were going to give out on him as they all stared him down and then scribbled a few things on their clipboards. Ashton closed his eyes and just wished all this pressure would go away. He needed it to go away soon or else he felt like he was going to have a panic attack. He hadn’t had one in years but at a time like this Ashton felt like one could come on at any second.

He kept scanning the crowd; he didn’t know what he was looking for but he just didn’t want to look back at the game yet. He could hear the ref’s arguing about something and it was putting the game time on hold but Ashton was glad for it. Suddenly Ashton’s eyes flicked off the stands and down to the fence that was lining the field and that’s when he saw him: Luke was standing by the fence with a camera around his neck and Ashton couldn’t believe his eyes. Luke never came to games and Ashton squinted just to make sure it was him. He felt himself smiling when he seen Luke smile and suddenly all of his nervousness was gone. He wished Luke had been here all the other times he was feeling like he was close to falling off the edge but he was here now and that’s all Ashton could focus on. The lights above the field were making his eyes practically shine and God, Ashton wished Luke would smile at him like that. The whistle was blowing and Ashton was forced to look away. As soon as he wasn’t looking at Luke anymore, the boy he had been head over heels for since middle school, Ashton could feel that sickly feeling in his stomach coming back and prayed that he could make it through this game. He had to hold it together or else there would be serious consequences.


	4. Calum

The game was boring him and Calum was reminded of another reason he never attended these games. He just wasn’t a sports person and honestly he didn’t have a clue how the game even worked. He had to admit that the boys out there looked pretty damn good in those tight pants but Michael was really the only guy he cared about. He all of a sudden thought of how Michael would look in those pants and bit his lip. He quickly wiped that thought away though and started skimming his eyes around, looking for the blue haired boy. Sure the game only started a few minutes ago but Calum still had faith that Michael would be here soon. His heart nearly stopped in his chest when he seen Michael leaning against the fence with his arms resting on top of it. He felt pain instead of excitement in his chest when he could obviously see that Michael was eyeing the side of Luke’s face. Calum hadn’t ever talked to Luke but he just knew that Michael practically followed him around like a lost puppy. Was Calum jealous? Absolutely but there wasn’t much he could do about it. Luke was good looking, he had to admit, so he really couldn’t blame Michael for the way he felt about him. Anyone could see that Michael had feelings for Luke but Luke was pretty unreachable. He was one of those people who was heavily involved in school clubs and all that. He got perfect grades while Michael barely even showed up to class. Calum really didn’t understand why Michael had such interest in him when they clearly had nothing in common.

He watched Michael smile at the field a couple of times then look to Luke and he obviously said something funny because it had Luke smiling too. Calum wanted that so bad; he wanted Michael to make him laugh and he wanted Michael to laugh because of the things he said too. He watched as Michael continued to talk to Luke with the most beautiful smile he’d ever seen. There was no doubt that Michael was the happiest when he was around Luke and it made Calum actually feel like he was going to be sick. He hated Luke for that; he really did. Hating Luke just because he got to spend time with Michael wasn’t a real reason to hate him but Calum just couldn’t help it. Luke made him happy and that’s desperately what Calum wanted to do. It hit him right then and there that Luke was the reason that Michael even came to the game today and Calum leaned forward and put his hands in his face. He felt so stupid for thinking this was his chance to finally talk to Michael. He hadn’t even planned on what he was going to say but now the situation was even more fucked than before. Micahel was happy there standing with Luke and Calum didn’t want to ruin it. Another part of him was more selfish though; he watned to march right over there and at least say hi to Michael. After all, he had gotten so excited about coming here and there was no harm in saying hi. Even a simple “hello” was something that Calum had never had the urge to do but he was really sick of being so whimpy about talking to Michael. Sure Michael was intimidating but with the way he was smiling he looked like some innocent puppy and Calum felt like this was the perfect time to go talk to him.

*

Calum ended up fondly staring at Michael for at least 10 more minutes until he forced himself to stand up. He could do this. He gripped his hands around his still half full hot chocolate and took a few deep breaths before walking down the bleachers stairs. He stopped once he got down to the ground and looked back to Michael. The blue haired boy was staring up at the bright lights then moving his eyes back down to the field. His pale skin was practically glowing and Calum felt like he couldn’t breathe. He knew it was all in his head and took another few deep breaths before continuing on. He was feeling himself gain confidence the closer he got because Michael seemed to be in a genuinely good mood but he was always like that when he was around Luke. Calum knew that he really needed to stop thinking about how Michael when he was with Luke; it was just making things more hard for him. He tried to think happy thoughts as he got even closer; after all, he had been looking forward to this all week and he knew he could do this. He imagined how the conversation would go down and he just prayed that it would, for once, work out for him. Just once he wanted things to go his way.

The next thing that happened seem to all happen in slow motion. As he was passing some kid with black hair he could see the boy turn around and all of a sudden the boy was knocking into Calum’s chest and the hot liquid was going all over his peach sweater and was slowly developing a huge brown spot on it. Calum froze and watched his cup fall to the ground before he was able to pay attention to what was going on around him. He looked up to see the boy who had bumped into him was laughing with three of his friends as the bent over, acting like it was the funniest thing they had ever seen. Calum wanted to just crawl into a ball right there on the spot, he wanted to be invisible like he was when he walked the hallways. He hated all this attention especially since he knew they were all just making fun of him. Calum felt his heart jump up into his throat when he remembered why he came here in the first place. He looked ahead and Michael was only a foot away from him. He was also chuckling to himself and Calum felt the tears beginning to form to himself as Michael was standing there laughing at him. This was a nightmare; it had to be a nightmare and Calum needed to wake up. He watched as Michael’s eyes left his sweater and briefly went up to his face before he was shaking his head and looking away. Calum literally wanted to die.

“Calum are you okay?” he heard a voice rush out and he looked over to see Luke’s worried face. Why was Luke talking to him? That wasn’t what he wanted. He wanted Michael to be concerned about him but Michael was too busy thinking that Calum was a total screw up. Calum knew that’s what the blue haired boy was thinking and he also knew that he was right; he was the biggest screw up there was. Without another word Calum went running off, not even knowing where he was going but he just knew he needed to get away from all these people. As he was running towards the school building he could feel his throat closing up so he slowed down but he still couldn’t breathe. This time he knew it wasn’t just in his head and he knew what was going to come next as he collapsed against the building.


	5. Luke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wow this Luke chapter is short but that's why I'm doing a double update and the next chapter is longer and actually really cute (I know it's been pretty angsty) Follow me on [Tumblr](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/) if you want!

Luke was still looking in the spot that Calum was just 5 minutes prior. The boy looked absolutely humiliated and it was just about bringing Luke to tears. He finally tore his eyes away and kept looking at the exit; he wanted to go after the boys so badly. He also couldn’t help but think of how beautiful Calum looked, even with make-up running down his cheeks. Luke just always thought he looked beautiful and would do anything to make the boy smile. He didn’t see Calum smile very often but when he did he never took advantage of it and made sure to look at him until the smile was off his face. Luke just couldn’t get enough of it. 

“I just feel so bad” Luke mumbled and he really didn’t mean to voice his opinion out loud and it had Michael giving him a puzzled look. Luke let out a breath because of course Michael wouldn’t have any sympathy for the boy “About what just happened to Calum. He looked so humiliated”   
“Who?” Michael scrunched up his eyebrows and Luke tried to keep his temper down. 

“The boy who just got hot chocolate spilled all over him while everyone around here laughed” 

“Oh…yeah” Michael chuckled and Luke felt his blood boiling “That fucking loser” and Luke swears he wanted to just punch the blue haired boy in the face. He really wanted to do it and with how infatuated Michael was with him he knew that Michael wouldn’t hit him back. 

“Can you just-“ Luke put his hand up and whooshed it away, hoping that Michael would get the message; he didn’t “Can you just get away from me?” 

“Umm why? What did I do?” Michael said all innocently but it only fueled Luke’s anger even more. 

“Get away from me!” Luke shouted and he noticed the few glances from people around him. He also noticed the obvious hurt on Michael’s face but pretended not to see it. 

“What the hell is your problem?” Michael shot back at him and Luke doesn’t think that he’s ever heard Michael’s words so sharp. 

“You” Luke gritted his teeth and then he was preparing to leave. He had to get away from him “Just stay away from me” he tossed over his shoulder and was glad when Michael didn’t follow him. He could still feel Michael’s stare on him as he moved down the fence but forced himself to stay focused on the game in front of him. He knew this would be a terrible idea coming here and he knew that Michael would be the person to ruin it for him.


	6. Ashton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love this chapter <3 let me know how you like it!

As Ashton earned the final touchdown of the game, winning it for them, he smiled wide as he stared up at the sky just telling himself over and over that he did it and everything was going to be alright. He was able to think much more into it because suddenly his team was running into him and grabbing him to have some huge group hug.

“You fucking did it man!” Connor shouted over all their teammates cheering and Ashton just closed his eyes feeling so at peace. He felt like so much weight was lifted off of him and he could finally breathe. After his teammates started to clear out a little he looked up to see the people in the stands going crazy as well. He felt so on top of the world as they exited the field. He felt the sidewalk under his cleets as they were got out of the fenced in area. He had Connor right by his side with an arm around his shoulder and Ashton could feel how proud he was. He loved that feeling.

“Guys can I take your picture for the yearbook?” a small but confident voice said and Ashton was smiling at the excitement of all of this until he looked up to see who had just spoken. Luke stood there with a grin on his face with the camera in his hand and Ashton felt frozen.

“Of course man!” Connor said being friendly as usual and then Connor was pulling him in and Luke was putting the camera up higher. Ashton smiled wide for the picture and now the real reason he was smiling was because Luke was standing here in front of him. Luke was then snapping the picture and Ashton didn’t want this to end.

“Thanks guys” Luke said casually and he spared them both a glance. Ashton made sure to smile at him and it came across as more shy than anything. It seemed to work though because Luke smiled back and then he was turning around and walking away. Ashton kept his eyes on the blond boy until Connor was shoving him and then dragging him along towards the locker rooms. Ashton wished he could have seen Luke’s smile for a lot longer.

*

The whole time he was in the locker room he kept thinking about how he was the reason for Luke’s smile and he knew it was something so simple but it was the first interaction that they had in years. He just couldn’t stop replaying it in his mind and he stepped out of the shower with a towel wrapped around his waist as he quickly dried off and slipped back into his white t-shirt and dark colored jeans. He left the shower area to see that Connor was the only person still in the locker room as he typed away at his phone while sitting on the small bench in front of the lockers.

“What’re you still doing here?” Ashton asked and it had Connor looking up from his phone.

“Just wanted to remind you about the party tonight” Connor smirked and Ashton just shook his head “Come on, you haven’t been to one in ages, Ash”

“I’m just really wiped out from the game” Ashton mumbled as he put his leather jacket on and slipped his gym bag over his shoulder.

“Yeah so am I but I’m not too tired to get drunk out of my mind” Connor laughed.

“Yeah well I am” Ashton said sternly so Connor knew he meant it.

“But you’re the team captain” Connor was whining now and Ashton was already sick of it “You gotta be there and plus I’m sure Piper will be wondering where the hell you are” Ashton had to agree that the last statement was true. He took out his phone and seen that he had exactly 5 missed calls from Piper. He could almost hear her voice saying “As you girlfriend it’s your duty to come with me to this party” Ashton rolled his eyes. He just wasn’t going to give in to anyone tonight.

“I’m not going” Ashton mumbled and then Connor was letting out a sigh.

“Alright” he said quietly “Guess I’ll see you Monday” was the last thing he said before he walked out of the locker room doors. He could tell that Connor was a bit upset that he hasn’t been going to parties lately but it was all just getting old; Ashton was just sick of them. He put a hand through his damp hair before walking out as well. It was now pitch dark and the temperature had gone down even more. Ashton shivered a bit and spotted his car. He was about to start walking towards it but then he heard a small whimper from the left of him. He quickly turned his head to see a small boy against the school wall with his knees up to his chest. Even from this distance he could tell the boy was breathing heavily and that it was obviously hard for him to breathe. Ashton rushed over to him and squatted down right in front of him.

“Hey” Ashton said softly, in fear of scaring the boy, but it happened anyways. The boy jumped and then Ashton was putting a soft hand on his arm “I’m not gonna hurt you” the boy seemed to relax at his words. He looked down to see a big brown stain on the boys sweater and was about to ask what had happened but then the boy seemed to be hyperventilating and Ashton knew what that meant. It had been years but he knew what was happening to the boy. He put both hands on the boy now and looked him in the eye “Hey. You gotta breathe okay? Breathe in and out for me. Can you do that?” the boy nodded but his breathing pattern still didn’t change “Match my breathing. In and out” Ashton spoke again and finally it seemed like he was getting somewhere with the boy. The boy closed his eyes and finally his breathing started to return to a medium pace “There you go” Ashton rubbed a thumb across his arm a little “You’re okay. You’re gonna be okay” The boy looked up and Ashton could see the smeared make-up on his cheeks as his eyes were glazed over. There wasn’t fear in his eyes anymore but Ashton could almost feel his sadness. Suddenly the boy began to shiver and put his face on his knees as an attempt to warm himself “Let me give you a ride home okay?” the boy again nodded but still didn’t make an effort to move so Ashton softly grabbed his arms and helped him to stand up “You alright to walk?” Ashton just had to ask because he was unsure if the boy was physically hurt or not.

“Y-yeah” the boy was still shivering and his voice was so small. Ashton put a hand on his back and walked them fast to his car. He was wearing a jacket and he was still freezing and this boy was only wearing a thin sweater so he knew he had to get him to warmth fast. Ashton quickly unlocked his car and guided the boy to the passenger seat before helping him up and then going over to the driver’s side. He immediately turned the heat on after he turned the car on and then he was pointing all the air vents towards the still shivering boy next to him. They drove in silence for a couple of minutes but then Ashton remembered that he didn’t even know where this boy lived.

“Um where do you live?” Ashton chuckled a bit and it earned a small smile for the boy.

“The next road…then I’m the 3rd house on the left” he spoke so quietly and Ashton felt like dealing with a small child but he thought it was quite adorable. Ashton nodded and soon they were pulling onto the road. Calum really didn’t live too far from the school but Ashton still knew there was no way he was going to let him walk home in this weather. Even if it wasn’t cold he knows he would still want to drive him home. He was then pulling into a driveway with a small two story house with blue shutters and flower beds all around the front porch. Ashton looked up to see a light flicker on in the top right corner.

“You gonna be alright?” Ashton just had to ask.

“Yeah” the boy said but it didn’t seem to convincing “Thanks for driving me”

“It was no problem” Ashton said easily. The boy was then smiling while still looking down at the floor and then he was reaching for the door “Oh and whoever did this to you is a total piece of shit and if I knew who they were I’d make sure they never did it again” Ashton shot out. He wasn’t really sure where this protective instinct came from but he just knew he didn’t want this boy to be hurt ever again. The boy gave him another smile and then he was exiting the car. Ashton didn’t pull out of the driveway until he seen the boy walking into the house and even then he still really didn’t want to leave.


	7. Michael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very short chapter but I'll be uploading an Ashton chapter as well. I'm realizing that there aren't that many Luke chapters and I'm sorry about that...I guess that's just the way it's worked out.

Michael walked into a pitch black house and ended up stubbing his toe on the dining room table before getting to the kitchen light and flicking it on. There was a huge pile of dishes in the sink as usual because his mom was never around to clean and Michael knew there was no way in hell he was doing them either. He went straight for the fridge and grabbed the whole pack of beers before heading up to his room. This wouldn’t be the first, or the last, time he tried to drink away the thought of Luke. Luke was always clouding up his mind no matter what and Michael just had no way of stopping it unless he was too drunk to even know where he was. It was his only option here and he could still feel the pain in his chest at remembering how furious Luke was at him when they were at the game.

It also confused the hell out of him because he still had no clue what he had done to make the boy so upset with him. It happened after that kid got hot chocolate spilled all over him so Michael blamed it on him honestly. They were doing totally fine before that kid came near them. Michael even had Luke laughing at some of his jokes he made about the players and that had been the first time he earned a smile from the blond boy. He was so proud in that moment but he should have known that it would all disappear sooner or later. He was laying on his back watching Cops with one arm behind his head and his other holding his beer as he kept taking big swigs of it. He was already on his third one and he knew he hadn’t even started yet. It was going to be a long night and Michael didn’t feel like sulking about someone he could never have. He knew he would have to see Luke again and it would pain him but honestly he wished he just didn’t have to go to school ever again. His life would be a lot better if he wasn’t constantly pining over Luke. His unrequited love for the boy was slowly killing him; he was sure of it.


	8. Ashton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You will see in this chapter that Ashton's girlfriend is verbally abusive. I've actually seen girls treat their boyfriends like this and it makes me sick. Boys can be verbally abused too and it happens more than you think. Anyways let me know what you think of this! (I'm sorry this has been filled with so much angst but I promise it gets better) follow me on [Tumblr](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/) if you want!

“Okay but where were you last night?” the high pitched voice, the bossy tone. Ashton already knew who it was and he knew this moment was coming but he at least hoped it wouldn’t happen until later in the day: maybe after lunch when he was full of shitty cafeteria but content because he had been starving all day.

“I just didn’t feel like going” Ashton mumbled but he knew that wouldn’t be enough to get Piper off his back; it never was. She seemed to put up a fight no matter what and he was more than sick of it.

“I looked like a fucking idiot without you there, Ashton” Ashton let out a sigh and shut his locker and walked away. It was a brave move really and he knew it would come back to bite him.

“You did not just walk away from me!” Piper shouted and Ashton looked around to see a few people looking their way. She always seemed to bring attention to him and Ashton hated it “Ashton what is your deal?” he all of a sudden felt her pulling his arm and he quickly pulled his arm back from her grasp but continued to stand there.

“I don’t have to attend every party just because you want to go to them” Ashton said sternly and she was crossing her arms “I was tired so I decided not to go and you don’t have to act as if it’s the end of the fucking world”

“You told me you were going and then you just don’t’ show up! How else am I supposed to act, Ashton?”

“Would you quit yelling?” Ashton lowered his tone hoping that she would too “And I never told you I was going. You just assumed that I was like you always do”

“I hated being there without you” all of a sudden she was batting her eyelashes and doing her puppy dog face. She was always all over the place like this and it made Ashton dizzy.

“Jesus” Ashton rubbed a hand over his face and looked around the halls as the final bell was ringing. This would be the third time he was late for 1st hour so it meant he would have to serve detention “I’ll sit by you at lunch instead of the guys and we’ll talk about this okay?”

“Okay” she smiled wide and tucked her long blond hair behind her ears before leaning in and giving Ashton a small peck on the mouth. Ashton could feel himself cringing and he couldn’t remember a time when he actually enjoyed kissing her “And don’t forget” she teased as she pointed a finger at him but Ashton knew there would be more yelling involved if he did forget. He just nodded and glared at her as she walked to her class before he finally dragged himself to English.

  
*

Lunch came around and he knew the next day he would be locked up in the detention room. After he got his food he then remembered he was supposed to sit with Piper to talk and he really wasn’t in the mood. He didn’t want to sit with his friends either. He just wanted to be alone. He skimmed the cafeteria and spotted Piper at her usual table with the rest of the cheerleaders and by the looks on their faces Ashton could tell they were having some gossip fest. He wanted no part of it and since Piper hadn’t spotted him he decided to make his way towards the back door of the cafeteria and out into the quad. He never ate out here but he just couldn’t be inside right now. He took a seat on the ground against the tree and started eating the pizza on his tray that literally tasted like cardboard. He didn’t care though because of how hungry he was and he dug into it like it was his 1st meal in days. He opened his mouth to take a the last bite of his pizza but he just never closed it as he looked up ahead of him and instead dropped the pizza on his tray. Luke sat against a similar tree to the one Ashton was against and Ashton wasn’t even aware that Luke was in this lunch.

All this time and Ashton could have been trying to strike up a conversation with the boy or at least admiring him from afar. Ashton hated himself right now for never coming out here to eat. Luke had a bag of chips that he was occasionally putting his hand into but mostly he was focusing on the laptop on top of his outstretched legs. He had a green zip-up jacket on with a black hoodie underneath and Ashton smiled at how cuddly he looked. His blond hair was in a perfect quiff like it always was and Ashton always wondered how long it took him to get his hair looking like that. Everyday Ashton would make himself look presentable in the morning just because he wanted to look good just in case Luke looked at him and he began to wonder who Luke wanted to look good for. It then occurred to him that maybe not everyone looked good to impress someone else and maybe that was just a thing that he dealt with because he was so insecure. Luke probably just made himself look good for himself and didn’t care what other people thought; Ashton was sure that was it.

He still watched as the boy took a sip of his green tea that was next to his hip and then he was putting the cap back on as his eyes never left the screen. He must really be doing something important and Ashton thought his concentrating face was so cute. He was pretty sure that Luke could make anything look cute though. Ashton was just so amazed by him and sometimes he couldn’t remember how it even all started since it had felt like ages that he’s had these feelings for the blond boy. Right then he remembered though.

His infatuation for Luke started in 6th grade. Most boys Ashton’s age were focused on girls and video games but the only thing that Ashton could really focus on was the way Luke looked when he was in English class. By a chance of bad luck Ashton hadn’t had an English class with Luke since then and he felt like it was the universe playing a sick trick on him. Most of the kids in their class would be chatting with friends or being rowdy but Luke always had his pencil glued to the paper in front of him. Sometimes his pencil would leave the paper for a few seconds as he would look out the window, lost in thought, but then he would go right back to writing. Ashton always wondered what he was writing about and one day he finally got the courage to ask him. He remembers slowly walking over to Luke’s table as he tried not to talk himself out of it. When Ashton stood right next to him he all of a sudden forgot what he was going to say and then Luke was looking up at him and Ashton kind of panicked.

“Uh…” Ashton rushed out and then he was looking anywhere but Luke.

“Do you wanna sit down?” Luke spoke and Ashton felt his heartbeat picking up. He wasn’t sure what was happening to his stomach too because it felt like he was on a rollercoaster and he was so afraid of what was happening to him. He sat down after feeling like his knees were about to give out. He still didn’t get why he was so nervous. It was usually pretty easy for him to talk to people; even people he barely knew.

“What’re you writing about?” Ashton shot out and there it was. He somehow got the courage to form a normal sentence. Luke looked up to him again but then he was writing a few more things down before he was answering the question.

“Just…everything” Luke said simply but Ashton didn’t know what he meant.

“What do you mean?”

“I just write about everything going on in my life” Luke shrugged “Just whatever I feel like writing about” Luke seemed so much older and he was so much different than the other kids Ashton knew. He was very beyond his years and Ashton loved it.

“Oh” Ashton smiled “That’s cool” it was such a boring response and Ashton felt like a complete idiot. Luke just smiled at him before going back to his writing and that was that.

It was the 1st interaction they had and Ashton can still remember it like it was yesterday. That had been the last time they talked and as Ashton stared over at Luke against the tree he felt himself getting nervous like he did back in 6th grade. Luke still had that same effect on him and Ashton still didn’t know what that meant. Just as Ashton was starting to gain the confidence to talk to Luke, the boy was shutting his laptop and grabbing his chips and tea before standing up. Ashton almost felt himself saying “Wait” or “Don’t go” but it felt like he couldn’t even move his lips. He just watched the boy walk across the quad and into the lunch room. Ashton felt so pathetic.


	9. Calum

He had finally made it to art class and Calum felt safe as soon as he stepped in the doorway. Art class had always been his safe place for as long as he could remember and Calum smiled to himself as he sat at the desk by the window like he always did. It overlooked their schools garden and Calum loved looking at all the flowers. Sometimes he would draw them and make sure to add them to his collection of drawings at home. His next, and last, hour was Chemistry was with Michael and usually he was always excited to see the blue haired boy but he wasn’t today. He wished that he didn’t have to go and remember the horrible look Michael gave him at the game, like he meant nothing to the boy. Calum knew that it was true though; he was irrelevant to Michael but the thought still made him sick to his stomach. It was the main reason he felt so depressed all the time and he knew he shouldn’t let his happiness be in the hands of someone else but he just couldn’t help it. Michael meant everything to him. He started to draw the huge maple tree outside as he tried to calm down his thoughts.

His thoughts also kept going back to the boy who gave him a ride home last night and it wasn’t just any boy either. It was Ashton Irwin. Everyone knew that all the girls in the school wanted him and he was without a doubt the most popular person in school. For some reason he chose to take Calum home that day and Calum still didn’t understand why. Maybe he wasn’t as bad as Calum thought he was. It’s easy to think that all popular people are shallow and stuck up but maybe Ashton was different. Calum just had this strange feeling that he was. He could still feel Ashton’s soft touch on his arms and the way he was tyring to calm him down when Calum was having a panic attack. Calum was so grateful for it and wished that Ashton really knew how much all that meant to him. No one had ever been so kind and delicate with him and Calum never realized how much he needed to be nurtured and cared for until Ashton had been like that with him. Calum didn’t really know what these feelings meant but he knows he’s only felt them for one other person.


	10. Michael

When Michael woke up the next morning he had the worse headache he has ever had and ended up falling out of bed in an attempt to grab his phone from the bedside table. At first he was confused as to why he even drank as much as he did but then he remembered when he seen the stamp on his hand from the football game. He drank so much because Luke hated him and Michael hated himself even more because he upset Luke. He still wasn’t sure what he did to piss the boy off but he was determined to find out. He ended up staying in bed for most of the day but decided to go into school after lunch since he had Chemistry with Luke last hour and it was probably his only chance to talk to the blond.

*

It was now almost the end of the day and he was walking towards Chemistry. He kept trying to figure out what he was even going to say to Luke to make sure the boy would talk to him. He knew he couldn’t go with his usual route of flirting with the boy and bugging him until he just gave in. This time he had to do something different and he realized that he would just have to be real with him. He couldn’t let his cocky attitude show at all because he knew how much Luke hated it. The only reason Michael even acted like that was so Luke didn’t know how head over heels for him he really was; it was a defense mechanism and the only one Michael knew. He was biting his lip, trying to calm down, when he looked to the right and seen that Luke was still at his locker. They did have 5 minutes left until class started but usually Luke was always the first person in class so Michael was actually a bit concerned. He just stood there staring at Luke for a few more seconds before forcing himself to walk over to him.

“Luke-“ Luke was instantly jumping and Michael wanted so badly to put a hand on his shoulder “It’s just me” Luke let out a breath and went back to looking in his locker.

“What do you want?” he mumbled. This time he didn’t seem upset, which Michael took as a good sign, but he just seemed done with everything. Michael had never seen him so depressed and he would almost rather see him upset.

“Luke I just-“his soft voice instantly had Luke looking at him with a surprised face “What did I do to piss you off last night at the game? Please just tell me what I did and I promise I won’t do it again” Luke just stared at him with a shocked expression on his face and Michael had never seen Luke look at him like that. In an instant the look was gone and Luke was looking depressed again as he took a deep breath.

“When you called Calum a loser” Michael looked to the side and then remembered that Calum was the boy from the game and he nodded at Luke to continue “I just don’t get why you had to say that about him. He hasn’t done anything to you”

“I’m sorry” Michael said and he couldn’t even remember the last time he felt those words leave his lips “Are you guys friends or something?”

“Well…no” Luke looked sad when he spoke “But he’s a nice guy. Just be nicer to him…I seen the way you were laughing at him when he got his drink spilled on him”

“Everyone else was laughing too” Michael said defensively but he knew how stupid that sounded.

“I wasn’t” Luke said simply and Michael leaned against the locker next to Luke’s, never letting his eyes leave the blond.

“Okay” Michael said after a few seconds “I’ll be nice” Luke smiled wide at him and Michael felt like letting his guard down was totally worth it just to see that beautiful smile.

“Shall we go to class?” Luke said in this cheeky tone and it had Michael laughing but then he was grabbing Luke’s shoulder before he could turn around.

“Wait” Michael bit at his lip and for some reason this was different than the other times he’s asked Luke this question “Will you just please hang out with me tonight…it doesn’t have to be a date” it killed Michael to say that last part but he was just taking anything he could get; Plus saying that was something he’s never tried before.

“Hangout where?” Luke said but he still sounded a bit doubtful of the question.

“I figured we could just go to Pizza Sam’s” Michael shrugged like it was no big deal but really he was dying inside, just needing Luke to agree to it.

“Okay” Luke smiled as he nodded and Michael didn’t even care that he had the biggest smile on his face “Pick me up at 5?”

“Seriously?” Luke nodded as he was still smiling and Michael about cried with how happy he was “Okay” Michael didn’t know why but he was having trouble even forming sentences. They started walking to class and Michael still couldn’t believe that after all this time Luke had agreed to hang out with him. He doesn’t think he would really believe it until they were at Pizza Sam’s. They walked close on their way to class and Michael couldn’t help but playfully bump into Luke’s arm before they entered the classroom. It had Luke letting out a little giggle and Michael couldn’t even remember the last time he was this happy. Maybe him and Luke would work out after all.


	11. Calum

Usually Calum would be staring at the door of the classroom just waiting for Michael to walk in; he wasn't today though. Currently he had his head down on his desk just praying that he could fall asleep and his teacher wouldn’t notice. Then he could escape this class as quick as possible; that’s all he wanted. As the final bell went off the classroom became noisier with more voices but Calum still didn’t pick his head up; it wasn’t like anyone would notice anyways. He was actually starting to drift off, despite all the noise, when he heard Michael’s voice.

“It’s just not in the cards for me” Calum still had his head down but he could tell Michael was smiling while he spoke. Calum didn’t dare to miss that so he picked his head up and squinted at the bright lights before focusing on Michael only a few desks away. He was of course with Luke. God, Calum despised Luke. He watched as Michael continued to laugh and talk with Luke and it felt like the football game all over again. Calum couldn’t stand watching it any longer so he didn’t. He put his head back down. He could hear his teacher beginning to talk but Calum purposely blocked it out. He was getting to his breaking point, he really was and all he wanted to do was go home, sleep and never wake up. He knew the whole time he was asleep that he would dream of Michael because Michael was the only thing he ever dreamed about. In his dreams Michael loved him back, he kissed Calum and held him tight and just talked to him like he was important. Calum felt tears in his eyes just thinking about how unrealistic his dreams really were. Michael wouldn’t ever look at him like that, would never touch him like he meant something. Calum hated himself for even thinking those types of things. He heard Michael let out a loud laugh at something Luke said and Calum actually felt himself whimper. This was absolute torture.


	12. Ashton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes I added four chapters today...the next 3 chapters after this are the ones I'm most excited about (it's when things start really happening) I'm going to take a slight break though and not post for a couple of days cause so far I've written 21k on this fic and I only started it a few days ago. That's a lot of writing and I need to chill out lmao anyways let me know what you think of these four chapters! I love the comments :) Also it would be awesome if you could share this fic on tumblr if you like it cause I'm trying to get it more views. You can reblog it [here](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/post/139943909609/lost-hearts-cliffordaffliction-5-seconds-of)

Ashton was trying to pay attention to the teacher, he really was, but all he could look at was the way Luke kept looking over to this blue haired kid and smiling wide. Ashton didn’t know what the blue haired boys name was but he honestly didn’t care. He was hated how jealous he was of him though. He wished he could have Luke’s attention like that. He realized later that Mr.Blue hair kept making funny faces at Luke and that was why he kept smiling. Ashton rolled his eyes away from them for about the 10th time in the last 5 minutes but this time he promised himself he wouldn’t look back. He knew he’d break that promise but he didn’t expect it would be so soon. Once he looked back to Luke he saw that the boy was chewing on his lip as he read something on the paper in front of him. He looked so concentrated and Ashton was reminded of the time in 6th grade when he had first spoken to Luke.

He glanced at the clock and seen that the class was almost over. He thought to himself that time must fly when you’re fondly staring at someone you can’t have. Ashton just felt like a creep now cause he had literally been staring at Luke on and off for the entire class period. He put his head down and turned it to the right and was a bit surprised at what he seen. The brown haired boy that he had drove home last night was in this class and he was sitting there looking just about as miserable as Ashton felt. Ashton hadn’t even known he was in this class and he knew it was because he was always so focused on Luke. He doesn’t even think he’d notice if the teachers’ desk were to randomly burst into flames.

The brown haired boy was then looking at him and Ashton gave him a slight smile, he would have smiled bigger if he had the strength. Luckily the boy smiled back but then he was staring out the window on the opposite side of the room. Ashton continued you watching him and then he seen the boy looking the direction of Luke but if Ashton was seeing it right the boy was staring at Mr. Blue hair and not Luke. Ashton looked back between them a few times and seen the blue haired boy smile and quickly looked back to see the brown haired boy smiling now too. It was a different kind of smile than the boy gave him though. Ashton didn’t have much time left to think about it because the bell was ringing. He waited in his seat and watched Luke and blue hair get up still just laughing away. Ashton gritted his teeth and looked away before getting up to leave too.

  
*

Ashton was walking to his locker and looked up to see Piper standing against it with her arms crossed. He looked around a couple of times, seeing if there was a way he could just escape and run straight to his car but there was no way out. Piper laid her eyes on him and Ashton knew he was fucked. She looked furious and he knew he was in for it.

“So?” was all she said and Ashton just looked blankly at her.

“What?” he played dumb.

“You were supposed to come talk to me at lunch” Ashton thought about straight up lying to her; saying that he got sick and had to go the nurses office but he was such a bad liar. She would see right through it and get even more upset.

“I just didn’t want to talk to you in front of all your friends” which was sort of the truth “I know how the like to spread shit around” he looked at her closely as she twirled her hair a little in her fingers.

“Okay” she said calmly and Ashton let out a breath “So when can we talk?” Ashton thought for a few seconds as he watched people walk past him. He was pretty hungry so maybe they could talk at some restaurant and he could get a meal out of it too. He deserved that much because he knew this wouldn’t be easy.

“How about at the pizza joint down the road?” Ashton was just really craving pizza and that was all there was to it.

“Fine” she uncrossed her arms “5:30 we’ll meet there”

“5:30 is fine” Ashton said softly and all she did was nod before she was turning around and leaving. Ashton was sort of dreading 5:30 even if it meant pizza. He knew that all she was going to do was yell at him and he really wasn’t in the mood to hear about it. Ashton wasn’t sure how much longer he could take this.


	13. Luke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to wait until tomorrow to post these but hey here's 3 more chapters cause there's too much suspense in them to upload them separately. Let me know what you think!

Luke stood in the mirror trying on his 5th shirt and he ended up taking that one off and tossing it on the bed too. He didn’t understand why he was even getting so flustered about what to wear. It’s not like this was an actual date; Michael had said it wasn’t. Also Luke didn’t even like him so why did he care if he looked good or not? Luke let out a breath and dug through his closet once again. He found just a plain black crewneck and slipped it on. As he looked in the mirror again he realized that the outfit looked too plain with his also black skinny jeans. He grabbed his silver necklace off his dresser and put his over his head. It just had an antler hanging off of it but it at least added something else to his outfit. He fluffed his hair up a few more times and straightened his crewneck out before finally heading downstairs.

Michael had texted him a couple of minutes ago telling Luke that he was leaving his house and would be there soon. Even though Michael said it wasn’t a date it sure did feel like it was. Michael was picking him up and Luke wondered how he really would react to being with Michael like this; maybe it wouldn’t be so bad and Luke would actually have fun with Michael. Soon he was looking outside to see a black car pulling up and then it was beeping two times. Luke smiled as from this view he could see Michael messing with the radio and then running a hand through his hair. Luke began to think that maybe Michael was as nervous about this as he was; of course he was. He had been wanting Luke to hang out with him for months; maybe even longer. Luke slipped his jacket on and shoes before jogging out of the house and getting into the car. Luke looked over to him as soon as he shut the door and Michael was already looking at him smiling.

“Never thought I’d see this happen” Michael said a bit breathlessly and Luke couldn’t help but blush a little. Michael smiled again when he did and then he was driving off. Luke felt strangely comfortable in Michael’s car with the warm heat blowing in his face and the sound of Michael humming along to the song on the radio. It just felt like they had done this a hundred times before and Luke couldn’t believe how fast the nervousness he had went away. He glanced over at Michael to see him wearing a denim jacket with black jeans and a backwards black snapback on. Luke didn’t know what was going on with him but he couldn’t stop staring at the boy. The way his blue hair looked even brighter next to his pale skin and the way he kept biting at his lip.

The ride to the pizza place wasn’t very long and then they were pulling into the parking lot. Michael gave him another smile before they were both getting out of the car. They weren’t talking when they walked in but Michael kept bumping into him and it made Luke giggle. Once again he didn’t know what was going on with him. They got seated in a booth near a window and then Michael was letting out a breath and looking out the window “So what kind of pizza do you like?”

“I’m not too picky” Luke said; he just didn’t want to be too demanding but then he remembered that there was something in particular that he really didn’t like

“Anything except for pineapple” that had Michael letting out a chuckle as he shook his head.

“That’s my favorite”

“Oh I can just pick them off then and-“

“Luke” Michael stopped him while still laughing “We’re getting what you want. You could even chose to get anchovies and I’d still just be happy that you even agreed to doing this” it was something so simple but it had Luke smiling and feeling his cheeks get hot again. He all of a sudden started to feel bad for all the times he had rejected Michael. He hadn’t always been so nice to him and he wished he could take it all back. There must be a reason Michael hadn’t given up on trying to get Luke to hang out with him.

“I don’t like anchovies either” was what Luke said back.

“Thank god” Michael dramatically let out a breath and Luke laughed into his hand. Soon the waitress was getting their drink orders and then they were alone again. Just like Luke liked it. Michael was looking out the window at some bird chirping in a tree but Luke was looking at Michael. He felt like asking something that had been bothering him.

“Michael” Luke said shyly but Michael instantly gave him his full attention as he leaned back in his seat and seemed as if he was looking all over Luke’s face “How long have you wanted this?”

“How long have I wanted what?” Michael smirked a little but Luke wanted a serious answer so he decided to be more serious about the question.

“How long have you wanted…me?” Luke was biting at his lip once Michael’s smile was gone and he looked downright nervous; Luke had never seen him like this

“I’m sorry. You don’t have to answer that”

“No it’s okay” Michael closed his eyes for a few seconds then glanced around the pizza place before looking back to Luke; like he was trying to get himself together

“A while” he finally said.

“How long is a while?” Luke asked curiously.

“Couple years” Michael mumbled as he looked down and rubbed his fingers across the laminated menu. Luke felt kind of frozen. Michael had only been talking to him for a couple of months but he had liked Luke for years.

“But you only started talking to me a couple of months ago”

“Yeah…” Michael nodded, with his head still down, while bringing his bottom lip between his teeth “I finally couldn’t take it anymore. I had to talk to you”

“I’m sorry” Luke suddenly said and that had Michael looking up at him.

“For what?” Michael asked like it was the dumbest thing he’s ever heard.

“I was an asshole”

“No you weren’t, Luke” he said sternly “I should have just taken no for an answer…I shouldn’t have bugged you so much”

“Well I’m glad you didn’t stop bugging me” Luke smiled and it had Michael raising his eyebrows “Cause we wouldn’t be here if you did. I’m glad we did this” Michael closed his eyes for a few seconds as his head was down and Luke could almost sense that Michael was repeating his words in his head. It’s like Michael had been dying to hear them.

“Me too” he practically whispered as he smiled up at Luke. The waitress was coming back with their drinks and ruining their cute moment but Luke tried to tell himself that they would have moments like this again. She took their pizza order and they ended up deciding on ham and pepperoni. It was Luke’s favorite and Michael insisted that’s what they would get. Luke really could tell Michael had wanted this for a long time by the way he just kept looking over at Luke and smiling; like he couldn’t believe that the blond boy was actually here with him. It made Luke get this fuzzy feeling in his stomach every time he did and Luke wasn’t sure what all these new feelings meant but he was okay with them. Michael turned out to be not what he expected at all and Luke just really wished he would have given him a chance before. This is what he’s been missing out on and he kind of hated himself right now. Instead of beating himself up about it he just enjoyed Michael’s company and Luke swears it’s the best time he’s had in a while.


	14. Ashton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess I'll say this again so there isn't any more misunderstanding: Ashton is verbally abused. That's all there is to it. Piper has no reason for being the way she is except for the fact that she is an awful person. She is based off of someone I used to know personally. She will be gone though soon because I only included her to put an extra spin on the story.

It was almost 5:30 and Ashton was nervously drumming his fingers on the table. It was the table him and Piper always sat at whenever they’d come here so he knew she would know where he was. He wasn’t exactly sure how this would go down but usually it would start by Piper yelling at him until she was out of breath and then them going back to his house and acting as if none of it ever happened. Ashton knew he wouldn’t be doing that tonight though; not matter how much Piper begged he wouldn’t let her talk him into it. They hadn’t had sex in weeks and maybe that was another reason she had been so bitchy. Ashton just never felt in the mood which was strange because he was a teenage boy after all but he just knew he had lost feelings for her a long time ago. He wasn’t one of those people who could make it just strictly about the sex and nothing else. He really needed to have feelings for the person. He honestly didn’t know how much longer he could take this and he kept telling himself that he it wasn’t like he was stuck in this relationship; he could get out but it wasn’t that easy.

He wasn’t very good with confrontation and he hadn’t ever had to break up with someone. The last person he was in a relationship with was a girl in middle school name Cindy and once he felt like he didn’t want to be with her anymore he just ignored her until she got the hint. This wasn’t middle school though and he couldn’t do that to Piper. He had to handle this like an adult and just pray that he wouldn’t back out of it. Piper had to know that it was coming because of how distant he had been lately though. Maybe it wouldn’t be such a shock and she wouldn’t start crying. Ashton just hated seeing people cry and Piper was a very emotional person so who was he kidding; she would cry for sure. Ashton put his face in his hands and tried to figure out how he was going to do this. He was planning on just letting her get all the talking out first and then he would say what he wanted to. It was best for her to get all her feelings out first.

“Hey baby” said a high pitched happy voice and Ashton looked up to see Piper leaning down to give him a quick kiss. He didn’t pull away like he wanted to because that would be rude but he didn’t exactly get into it either. He was starting to forget what it was like to kiss someone that he actually had feelings for. He hadn’t felt that spark in so long.

“How are you?” he said casually as he leaned forward with his elbows on the table and clasped his hands together in front of his face.

“Starving” she whined as he looked at the menu then she started looking around “Where the hell is the waitress? I don’t even know why we come here”

“It’s never bothered you before” Ashton said watching his tone; not wanting to start anything.

“Well it bothers me now” she barked back and Ashton was letting out a breath. This is all they had been doing lately and it was starting to wear him out. Piper was then setting her menu down and glaring at him “What? Why do you sound so annoyed? Do I annoy you?” Ashton kept repeating the word “yes” over and over in his head. Her attitude bothered the shit out of him and he was so close to just freaking out on her and saying that they were over. He could just leave after that and it would be that simple; except it wasn’t. Instead he just shook his head.

“No…just-what did you want to talk about?”

“Us..obviously” he nodded and held his tongue, just wanting this to happen quickly “You’ve just been acting very strange lately and I miss the old you”

“Okay…what did the old me do?”

“The old you actually went to parties” and Ashton couldn’t help but roll his eyes at that; he couldn’t believe she was still freaking out about that “The old you actually wanted to be around me and paid attention to me. This is literally the first time we’ve went out in months”

“I know” Ashton said quietly “I’m sorry” to be fair they had hung out at his house a lot. Ashton just preferred staying at home instead of going out but Piper always had the need to go somewhere.

“So what’s your deal?” her snotty attitude was back and Ashton cringed. He had to do this. It was his chance while he was feeling brave.

“Piper” he reached forward for her hands “I just-“

“Hey guys, what can I get you?” the waitress appeared and Ashton swears he felt like jumping off a bridge.

“Shit” he mumbled under his breath and turned to look out the window. After Piper said what she wanted he just order a water. He desperately wanted some alcohol instead but that was another downside to only being 18.

“So what do you want?” she smiled and was actually being nice. Ashton was also a little confused as to why she didn’t ask him to continue what he was going to say before they got interrupted. She was just completely brushing it off and Ashton looked at her for a few more seconds before looking back to the menu.

“Well I was thinking of just getting the pineapple pizza and-“

“Ashton” she glared at him and her nice persona was totally gone “You know I don’t like pineapple on my pizza”

“Well you asked me what I wanted…” Ashton said slowly; He swears that sometimes it seemed like she did this shit just to purposely get under his skin.

“Okay but have I ever liked pineapple on my pizza? Like do you not know anything about me?” Ashton was close to losing it. He was just so close to getting up and leaving and just ignoring Piper like he did to Cindy until she got the point.

“Fine. Get whatever the fuck you want” he leaned back in his seat and took out his phone. He could feel Piper’s eyes on him and knew she was pissed. He could practically feel the anger radiating off of her.

“Ashton” she said sharply but then her phone was going off and Ashton let out a sigh of relief “Oh hi Lacey. I’m just with Ashton” Ashton looked at her for a few more seconds before he started skimming his eyes over the pizza place. Most of the people near him were couples but they actually looked happy with the person they were with. Ashton wanted that so bad. His breath caught in his throat when he spotted the person that he knew he would be happy with. It was the person he’d wanted to be with for years. Ashton felt himself actually smiling as he seen Luke smiling wide and even from this distance Ashton could see his cute little dimples.

His happy feeling went away though when he looked over to the other side of the table and seen the blue haired boy. This guy was really starting to get on his nerves; the way he got to spend all of this time with Luke while Ashton was sitting here being stuck with someone that he was so unhappy with. Ashton would do anything to spend time with Luke; to make him smile and laugh. He would make sure that Luke never felt like he wasn’t loved. He wouldn’t ever raise his voice at him no matter what and he wouldn’t ever treat Luke the way Piper treats him. Never in a million years. Ashton actually doesn’t think he would treat anyone the way his girlfriend treats him. He watched with a fond look as Luke took a bite of his pizza and then sipped at his pop a few times. He felt like whatever Luke did was cute and he couldn’t even tear his eyes away from him; he never could.

“Ugh I swear that girl has so many problems” Piper complained but Ashton still didn’t look away from Luke. In the corner of his eye he could see Piper putting her phone back in her purse and flipping her hair over her shoulder. Ashton decided to actually use Piper to his advantage and he looked back to her.

“Do you know who that blue haired kid is?” Ashton said flicking his direction to Luke’s table and then Piper was turning around.

“Oh…yeah” she faced Ashton again “His name is Michael Clifford. I think I smoked weed with him at a party once”

“What just you and him?” Ashton wasn’t jealous at all but Michael just didn’t seem like the type of person Piper would hang out with; she was pretty snotty and thought she was better than most people.

“No it was a big group of people. He’s pretty cool” Ashton had to stop himself from grumbling at that. He looked back to him and seen that he was showing Luke something on his phone and Luke was smiling. It seemed like Luke was always smiling when he was with this Michael guy and it made Ashton get a sick feeling. He wanted Luke to be happy, there was no doubt about that, but he just wished that Luke could be happy with him instead “Why do you ask?” Piper spoke again.

“No reason” Ashton shrugged it off like it was nothing.

“So anyway there’s this party next Friday and we’re going. No if’s, and’s or but’s” she said it like Ashton had no other choice. He hated it. He couldn’t stand being bossed around all the time and told what to do. It was driving him crazy. All he had to do was say the simple words “I think we should break up” and then that would be it. He would be free. He couldn’t move his mouth though. Instead he was watching as Luke stood up from the booth and both him and Michael were walking towards the door. He didn’t want Luke to leave. If Luke was leaving then Ashton wanted to leave too. He stared at the blond just silently begging for him to look back. Luke ran a hand through his hair and then stuck both hands in his coat pockets before he was disappearing outside. Ashton felt so empty.


	15. Michael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love this chapter (this is the one I've been wanting to show you guys. It gets happy finally lmao) Let me know what you think of this so far! Follow me on [tumblr](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/) if you want!

Michael was feeling on top of the world as he drove Luke back home. He was also sad that Luke was leaving him but he really had hope that he would get to do this again. Finally getting to laugh and talk with Luke was making him feel so alive and he doesn’t know how he survived without this for so long.

“It’s a classic, Luke!” Michael fake yelled at him as Luke once again tried to turn off Ramones song that was playing through the radio “You’re too young to understand”

“We’re the same age you dick” Luke started dying laughing and instead of laughing along with him Michael just fondly stared at him as he tossed his head back into the seat and closed his eyes; he always looked so beautiful and Michael desperately wanted to tell him that. He wanted to tell Luke how much he meant to him so badly; how he’s dreamt about moments like this for years. He still couldn’t believe this was actually his reality.

“I’m gonna have to show you some real music, Hemmings” Michael said, trying to shake off his feelings.

“I’d like that” Michael smiled at Luke’s soft voice and just hummed in agreement. He would love to lay in bed with Luke for hours just listening to music and holding him while he put kisses all over his face. Michael actually felt himself close to tears with how bad he wanted that. He wanted to hold Luke so badly.

“Thanks for hanging out with me today” Michael said quietly while still looking at his lap. He should have been looking up at Luke but he was feeling so shy in this moment. He could feel Luke staring at him for a few seconds before he spoke.

“I know you said this wasn’t a date…” Luke began and Michael whipped his head up to see Luke with a dead serious look on his face. Michael could feel his heartbeat picking up “But if you walk me up to my door does it make it one?” Michael felt himself smiling wide and he didn’t even care that he was blushing like a fool.

“Yeah I’d say it does” Michael almost whispered because he was having trouble speaking. Luke was then flicking his head over to his house and then they were both stepping out of the car. Michael walked right next to Luke down the short sidewalk leading to his house. Michael looked down and saw how close their hands were. He wanted to grab the boys hand but he didn’t want to push it; he was lucky that Luke was even letting him do this. They got up to the front porch and then Luke was leaning against the door, staring at Michael.

“I had fun tonight” he said in some girly voice and Michael chuckled; Luke was unbelievable “I really did though” Luke said in a serious voice and Michael nodded.

“Me too” was all he could muster up; it was like he was losing the ability to think properly.

“Can we do this again?” Michael couldn’t help but notice that Luke stepped a little closer to him and he could feel his breath get caught in his throat.

“Yeah…of course we can” Michael shot out. He would go get pizza with Luke everyday for the rest of his life if he could. Neither of them said anything for a few seconds after that, they just stared at each other as they stood close. Michael couldn’t help but flick his eyes all over Luke’s face. He had such beautiful features and it was driving Michael insane. He watched as Luke licked as his lip and bit at and that was the end for Michael.

“Can…Can I kiss you?” Michael whispered and he nearly fell over when he seen Luke actually nodding to his question. Michael panicked for a few seconds, not knowing where to start. He had wanted this for so long. He started by just softly putting both of his hands on Luke’s neck and rubbing at the skin. He hadn’t even kissed him yet but he already was feeling like he was close to passing out. Luke’s skin was so soft against his fingers and Michael took a deep breath before leaning forward. He doesn’t think he’s ever been this nervous in his entire life. Their lips were only an inch apart and Michael just stared into Luke’s blue eyes, getting lost in them. He tried to get himself together and then he just went for it. He closed the distance between them and lightly pressed his lips to Luke’s. He felt his heartbeat picking up and leaned his forehead against Luke’s before kissing him again, this time with a bit more force but still soft.

He was so glad that Luke reached out and wrapped his arms around his hips because Michael was so close to falling over from the intensity of it all. Luke held him tighter and Michael kissed him harder as he moved one hand up to Luke’s face. He rubbed his thumb against his cheek as he kissed him more slowly again and Luke was moving his lips in the exact same speed. It felt so perfect and Michael’s heart beat had actually sped up even more. He felt Luke temporarily stop and breathe out into Michael’s mouth, sending a chill down Michael’s spine then Luke was back to kissing him forcefully again. When Michael had to stop for air he pulled back a little and rested their foreheads together. Luke still had his eyes closed and then Michael was rubbing his thumb across his cheek a few times. Luke opened his eyes and smiled wide. Michael squinted his eyes shut, being so close to tears because of how long he’s wanted this and the shock that it had finally happened was just now hitting him. He thought about how badly he wanted to hold Luke so he wrapped his arms around the boys shoulders and brought him into his chest. Luke held him back just as tight and felt the blond rubbing his face against his chest. “You don’t even know how long I’ve wanted this” Michael said softly near his ear. That had Luke rubbing a hand up and down his back a few times and Michael couldn’t remember a time when he felt so comforted.

“I’m sorry, Michael” was all Luke could think of to say and Michael pressed a kiss to his hair. Michael didn’t ever want to let go of him.


	16. Luke

As soon as Luke got in his house he fell back against the inside of his front door and tried to slow down his breathing. He had actually liked kissing Michael? Loved it in fact and he had no clue where this had all of a sudden come from. Michael had been giving him attention for months so it couldn’t be just because of that. He didn’t even know what came over him in the car when he decided that he wanted their little hang out session to be a date. All these new feelings for Michael were confusing the shit out of him and he hoped that they wouldn’t just go away and he would end up hurting Michael.

He knows prior to this he had hurt Michael a lot, he could feel it the way Michael held him; it was like he didtn want to let go and Luke felt like such a shitty person. He knew he wouldn’t let himself hurt Michael ever again. The boy didn’t deserve it. Luke could also feel the love that Michael felt for him as he kissed him. It was like every movement of his lips was laced with it. Luke couldn’t get enough of it and he had never felt like that when he had been kissed.

He only had a few other kisses in his life but he knows that Michael’s beat them all. Luke rubbed a hand through his hair and walked into the living room before falling onto the couch. He got out his phone and looked at Michael’s number on the screen. He wonders if Michael was looking at his number too. He knows that they had literally just left each other but he already felt like texting the blue haired boy. He was never this clingy so he, once again, didn’t know what was happening to him. Michael just made him feel so alive and so important. He looked at Luke like he was all that mattered and it sent shivers down Luke’s spine.

Luke also couldn’t help but realized that he hadn’t thought about Calum even once the whole time he was with Michael. He couldn’t even remember the last time he had gone that long without thinking about Calum and he wasn’t sure what that meant. Was he getting over Calum and falling for Michael? He knew for sure he was falling for Michael but the getting over Calum thing was sketchy. He really wouldn’t know if he was over the boy until he seen him in person. If his heartbeat didn’t start picking up and his stomach didn’t start flipping then he was over Calum. If all those things still happened well…then Luke would have a real problem on his hands.


	17. Ashton

At school that following Monday Ashton was at lunch and had somehow managed to avoid Piper for the first half of the day at least. Since they did have the same lunch he wasn’t sure how much longer he could pull it off. He was just scared that she would start yelling at him again and honestly he knew if she raised her voice at him even one more time then he would be breaking up with her in a way that would leave her crying. He knows that he would lose his temper on her if he had to hear her yelling again and he didn’t want to do that, even though she probably deserved it. Ashton stood with his tray in his hands as he looked all around the cafeteria. Right now Piper had her back turned towards him so Ashton felt like he was in the clear so he quickly walked towards the doors leading to the quad and sat against the tree that he had last time. He, once again, didn’t feel like being around his friends but he also hoped that this would give him another chance to see Luke. Maybe going outside for lunch was a regular thing for Luke and Ashton prayed that it was. If it was then he knew he wouldn’t ever have lunch inside again. He started taking bites out of his apple but still kept his eyes roaming around, looking for any sight of the blond.

“Ashton!” a friendly voice yelled from the left of him but Ashton already knew who it was. Soon Connor was sitting across from him with a orange soda in his hand

“I seen you come out here yesterday too…figured I’d give you some alone time but now I’m getting a tad worried” Ashton should have known this would happen. He hadn’t been himself for months and it was only a matter of time before Connor started to notice.

“I just like being out here” Ashton said simply. It was true but Ashton just left a few things out. Like how his girlfriend was trying to dictate his life and how he was hopelessly in love with a boy. Connor had no idea about Ashton’s sexuality and even though Ashton figured he would accept him he still wasn’t ready to tell him.

“Come on…” Connor said softly “What’s really going on, Ash?” Ashton just nodded and took a few sips of his water before he spoke up.

“I’m gonna break it off with Piper” Ashton finally looked at him and he seen Connor widening his eyes.

“Are you sure? I mean you guys have been together for a long time”

“100% sure. I’ve wanted to do it for a while”

“Shit” Connor ran a hand through his hair “So you’ve just been stressing out about it?”

“Yeah…” Ashton glanced around again for Luke “I just know she’s going to lose it on me if I do. She’s just so controlling and it drives me nuts”

“I can see that” Connor nodded as he let out a breath.

“I just feel like I’m trapped and I fucking hate it. Being in a relationship shouldn’t feel like that”

“So do you like someone else?” Connor asked suddenly and Ashton froze. He couldn’t tell him…there was no way. Ashton realized that he had the worse luck ever when he looked to the left to see Luke coming outside with his head down to his phone as he smiled. The sun was slightly shining and Ashton got mesmerized by the way he lightened his skin “Ashton” Ashton flicked his head back to Connor and forgot what he had even been asked.

“What?”

“I asked if you like someone else” Connor smiled a bit. Ashton looked back to Luke once more then focused on Connor again.

“No…I just can’t deal with her anymore” Ashton looked past Connor and saw that Luke was still looking down at his phone, the smile never leaving his face. Ashton figured he had to be talking to someone pretty important and he wished it was him. Ashton realized right then that he either needed to talk to Luke or he needed to get over him because this was driving him nuts. He was never nervous about talking to anyone but when it came to Luke he just felt so small.

“Well I’m gonna head inside” Connor was then standing up and stretching “You sure you don’t wanna come inside?”

“I’m sure” Ashton said quickly so Connor knew he was serious.

“Alright. I’ll see you at practice” Ashton cringed at that. He had been so preoccupied about Piper and always thinking about Luke that he had totally forgotten about practice today. He had it every Monday so he wasn’t sure how he hadn’t remembered it. He knew his head wouldn’t be with it and his coach would end up yelling at him too. Ashton was just so sick of being yelled at all the time. It was wearing him thin. He looked back to Luke and seemed to calm down a bit. The boy was still on his phone and Ashton felt the bravery coming on; he felt like he could actually go talk to him this time but he felt like he would be interrupting him. He promised himself that the next time he seen Luke he would talk to him. That meant that he would talk to him in Chemistry but he had that class with Michael. Michael always seemed to be up Luke’s ass so Ashton knew he couldn’t talk to him then. He was so fucked.


	18. Luke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idk what is with the lack of Calum chapters but I promise I'm not doing it on purpose. As this progresses there will be more Ashton chapters or more Michael chapters etc so sorry if that upsets anyone. I just wrote chapter 28 today though and it's a Cashton chapter that is so fucking adorable. I wish I could post it but I can't post that many chapters at one time lmao anyways let me know how you like these chapters! (the chapter after this one is where things really start taking off but I'm going to wait to post it because I'll have to post like 2 more chapters along with that one) Follow me on [tumblr](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/) if you want! <3

From a distance Luke could see Michael walking towards him and any other day he would feel irritated, knowing that Michael was coming over to bug him but now he smiled wide and felt himself automatically feeling happier as Michael got closer. Michael wrapped his arms around Luke’s waist as Luke was still facing the locker and Luke melted into the touch. He already missed it.

“Hey” Luke smiled wide as he turned around and gave Michael a kiss on the lips “Where have you been all day?” Luke pouted and it made Michael laugh.

“This is always the only time I see you”

“Oh…right” Luke shyly looked down.

“Hey do you wanna go get pizza after school?” and Luke felt himself smiling wide but then he shook his head.

“I’ve got a yearbook club meeting after school” he saw Michael frowning too “But after that we can. I get out at 5”

“That works” Michael shrugged and he was smiling again “Do you want me to pick you up at your house again?”

“Yeah” Luke said after a few seconds of thinking about it “Cause I’ll wanna change” the warning bell started to ring after that and Michael pecked another kiss to Luke’s lips. Luke couldn’t help but lean forward and kiss him back a bit more roughly this time. He felt so happy with Michael smiling back at him, practically glowing. Luke for some reason felt himself looking behind Michael and he spotted Ashton Irwin eyeing him weirdly as he stood at his locker. There was someone else in front of him who was talking but Ashton clearly wasn’t paying attention. He almost looked sad but that confused the hell out of Luke so he knew it couldn’t be that. Luke didn’t know why but he didn’t want to look away with Ashton staring so intensely at him. He was Ashton Irwin for Christ sakes and Luke didn’t even know that Ashton was aware of his existence.

“We better get to class” Michael was then groaning and Luke forced himself to look away from Ashton.

“Y-yeah” Luke stuttered. He couldn’t even remember the last time he stuttered but he realized it was because he looked back to Ashton and the wavy haired boy was now biting at his lip as he continued to stare at Luke. It was driving him nuts and Luke grabbed Michael’s hand before dragging him down the hallway.

“Are you okay? You look like you just seen a ghost” Michael said sounding concerned and Luke just nodded. Why was Ashton looking at him like that? And why was it getting to him so badly?

“Yeah I’m cool” Luke tried to sound as casual as possible as they entered their classroom but he literally felt like falling over. He had no idea what was going on with him. He had Michael but as he looked up and seen Calum in the corner of the room his heartbeat picked up again and he felt himself fondly looking at the boy as he drew shapes on the window.

Then back there with Ashton he felt something too. He wasn’t sure what it was but it was something. Maybe he was just really surprised that Ashton was looking at him…yeah that had to be it. Luke sat down and watched Michael sit beside him. He had this beautiful boy right in front of him, a boy that he cared about a lot. Luke looked back at Calum again though and he almost got that same feeling of when he looked at Michael. It couldn’t be the same though because he hadn’t even talked to Calum.

Luke let out a breath and faced the front again and that was when he seen Ashton walking in. Luke internally groaned as he let his eyes slide down the boys body. He was wearing a red t-shirt that hugged his biceps tightly and a pair of dark blue jeans. Luke watched as Ashton put a hand through his wavy hair and then he was slumping down in a seat a few rows away from Luke’s. Luke wanted Ashton to look at him like that again like he had in the hallway. Maybe it was a onetime thing and Ashton wouldn’t ever do it again. Luke felt himself deflating at that thought but also hated himself for feeling this way. He really had to get it together. If he didn’t he could end up hurting Michael and that wasn’t what he wanted at all.


	19. Ashton

This time Ashton forced himself not to look at Luke across the room. When he saw Luke kissing Michael in the hallway it had almost made him burst into tears right then and he hated himself for getting so worked up about it. He should have seen it coming; Michael and Luke getting together. Ashton still felt a sharp pain in his chest though at seen Luke kiss him though. It killed him seeing that but he also found himself not being able to look away. Ashton could hear Michael’s voice across the room and it was driving him nuts. He knew it was Michael’s voice because he kept saying “Luke”. Ashton really didn’t know how much longer he could take this. He had to just get over Luke; it was as simple as that; except it wasn’t that simple.

Ashton had been in love with him for so long he didn’t even know if he could get over him. That thought scared him to death. Would he just be pining over Luke for the rest of his life? Would he never be able to move on and find someone else because he was so caught up in Luke? Ashton let his head fall to the desk and he knew he was overreacting but he couldn’t help it. He had just had his heart stomped on and every bad thought was coming at him at once. He didn’t even let himself be reminded of the fact that he still had to break up with Piper. He hadn’t ran into her all day, which was very strange, but in a way he was glad for it. It gave him more time to think of how to go about it. Another part of him just wanted to get it over with and he would simply say “We’re done” and walk away if it came down to that. He just needed to get out of that toxic relationship because it was only adding even more stress to his life. The teacher began talking but Ashton kept his head down, not feeling like doing anything except for drowning in his own sadness. He knew this class would seem like it was dragging on for hours and he just wanted it to be over so he began to close his eyes. He found sleep a lot sooner than he thought he would.

*

Practice was absolute hell. Ashton couldn’t focus on any of the plays and his coach kept getting pissed at him every time he would fuck up. His teammates kept shooting him weird and worried looks wondering what was going on with him. Usually he was the person who was the most focused during practice but he just couldn’t hold it together today. He kept thinking about how Luke’s lips moved against Michael’s and how Luke slipped his arm around Michael’s waist, holding him tight.

By the end of the practice he was feeling so emotionally worn out on top of being physically tired as well. All he planned on doing was getting a quick shower and then changing before he drove home. Usually they would go get pizza afterwards but Ashton wasn’t feeling it. He had no appetite and all he wanted to do was sleep. He was now entering the locker room as everyone was already in there. He had walked very slowly to the school so most of the boys were already changing and getting ready to head out.

He felt Connor’s eyes on him as he walked into the shower and then he was closing the curtain and stripping down. The warm water running down his body felt amazing and Ashton felt like he would actually fall asleep if he stayed in here too long. The emotional tiredness was what was getting to him the most. Ashton was just so sick of feeling that pain in his chest all because he wanted Luke and couldn’t have him. He was then shutting the water off and slipping out of the shower area after he was dressed in black sweatpants and a black t-shirt. It felt so good to be in comfy clothes as he walked back into the locker area. It was quiet so he expected that everyone would be gone but there was still one person sitting on the bench and Ashton let out a breath.

“So I’m guessing you didn’t break up with her…or you did and you just feel really bad about it” Ashton laughed at the 2nd thing he said.

“The first one” Ashton mumbled back to Connor.

“Why haven’t you done it?”

“I think she’s been avoiding me…it’s like she knows I’m going to break up with her”

“She probably does. She’s just weird like that” Ashton nodded in agreement and heard a few of his teammates laughing really loudly outside the door.

“I’ll just have to go over to her house tonight” Ashton put a hand through his hair and put his bag over his shoulder “Cause I can’t deal with this anymore”

“Well I hope it goes well for you”

“It won’t” Ashton chuckled a little but he didn’t think it was funny “But it’s gotta be done” the voices got louder outside and his teammates were yelling things and laughing. Ashton looked back to Connor and Connor was looking confused too.

“What the hell are they doing out there?” Connor said not tearing his eyes away from the door.

“Let’s go see” Ashton said quickly and for some reason he felt himself getting worried.

“Wait” Connor said “Let me get my bag” he quickly walked over to sling his bag over his shoulder then they were making their way towards the door. Since they were being so loud Ashton expected to see them right outside the door but then he heard the noise from the left of him and spotted five guys from his team in a circle that was in the corner of the gym.

“What the fuck?” Ashton mumbled as he tried to look past them but he came up with nothing. He started walking and Connor followed. All of a sudden one kid was moving slightly to the right and then Ashton could see what was in the middle of them. Ashton felt his heart jump in his throat when he seen the brown haired boy curled up in a ball as one kid kept kicking him all over and the rest of them were laughing.

Ashton took off running and pushed through the crowd, not even caring if he knocked any one over, and then he was grabbing the kid who was kicking at the brown haired boy and pining him up against the wall. The kid was their running back and his name was Jared. Ashton honestly never talked to him but he absolutely hated him now.

“What the hell are you doing?” Ashton shouted at him and Jared just laughed.

“Come on, Ashton. We’re just having a bit of fun with the kid. Besides…he’s a fucking faggit” when he said that everyone else around them laughed and Ashton just lost it. He grabbed Jared’s shirt and made his back hit hard against the cement wall. He heard a few kids behind him gasp or say “oh my god” but Ashton didn’t care.

“I don’t want to ever fucking see you touch him again” Ashton said quietly but his voice was laced with anger and Jared just stared at him with wide eyes “You understand?”

“Y-yeah…I won’t” was all Jared managed to get out and then Ashton was letting go of his shirt. He glanced back at the other boys and seen their surprised faces.

“Get the fuck out of here” he spat out and they were all immediately fast walking towards the exit of the gym. Ashton let out a breath then looked back down to the floor. Connor was already squatting down in front of the brown haired boy but the boy was still curled up in a ball and refused to look up as Connor rubbed a hand on his arm. Ashton walked over to them and patted Connor on the shoulder. Connor stood up and Ashton got down to eye level with the brown haired boy.

“Are you okay?” the anger from his voice was completely gone now and he was almost whispering. The boy was shaking and Ashton closed his eyes, not wanting to cry from seeing how scared the boy was “They’re gone. I promise they won’t ever hurt you again” after he said those words he felt the boys stop shaking and then he was slowly lifting his head up. Ashton widened his eyes when the boy looked up.

“Jesus Christ” Connor muttered behind him. The boy had one eye that was beat red and already starting to swell and his lip was bleeding as it quivered. Ashton couldn’t help but move his hand from the boys arm and move it to his cheek instead as he tried to comfort him. Surprisingly enough the boy didn’t even flinch away from the touch.

“I can’t believe they did this to you” Ashton whispered as he moved his hand down to the boys chin to move his head slightly the right. On the other side there were a few cuts on his lip as well and on his cheek. Ashton let his hand fall and put it in his own lap as he turned back to Connor “Is the nurses office open?”

“No…but I’ve got a key” Connor smiled to himself a bit. He was friends with the janitor so he had all kinds of keys for the school. Ashton just nodded and then looked back to the hurt boy.

“Can you walk?”

“I don’t k-know” the boy muttered and Ashton almost smiled at how cute his voice sounded. He had missed it honestly.

“Connor can you help me?” Ashton got on one side of the boy and then Connor was getting on the other side as they helped him stand. Ashton heard the boy wince in pain and he stopped before making him walk “We’re just going to take you to the nurses office okay?” Ashton spoke to him and the boy nodded. All Ashton wanted to do was make sure this boy wasn’t in pain anymore; he couldn’t stand seeing him like this.


	20. Calum

Calum felt so safe with Ashton’s arm around him as they lead him into the office. His thigh was killing him from the boy kicking him hard and Calum felt like his leg could give out at any second but he knew Ashton wouldn’t let him fall. He didn’t know the other boy that was helping him but he did know his name was Connor from Ashton saying it earlier. He knew Connor wouldn’t hurt him though. They finally entered the nurses office and Ashton helped him to sit up on the little table area.

“Everything you need should be in here” Connor said as he was grabbing down a first aid kit from the top shelf. Calum watched Ashton nodding “Do you got this? if not I can stay but I really got get home, Ash”

“I got it” Ashton said quickly and Calum relaxed. It’s not like he thought Connor was going to hurt him it was just that he trusted Ashton more. He felt more comfortable around him.

“Okay. Call me tonight alright?” Connor said once he was at the door and Ashton nodded again. Calum let out a breath but then he felt pain go through his stomach and he held it as he bent forwards a little.

“Fuck” Ashton’s hands were on his shoulders again and Calum actually felt the pain in his stomach going away as he sat upright again. He was met with Ashton’s caring eyes and Calum felt an entirely different feeling in his stomach “I’m gonna help you okay?” Calum nodded at him and watched as Ashton grabbed the first aid kit. He set it down and then he was grabbing a tissue and wetting it before coming back to Calum. Calum felt Ashton dabbing the dried up blood away from his lips and then he was tossing it away.

He then proceeded to grab an ice pack from one of the cupboards and he was softly touching it to Calum’s bruised eye. Calum closed both of his eyes at the coldness of it but it was comforting. Calum practically melted into the touch when he felt another cold tissue wiping at his cheek and he couldn’t believe how soft Ashton’s touches were. It felt so good that Calum actually felt like he could fall asleep but then Ashton was speaking “Are these the same guys who messed with you before?” and Calum almost smiled. He couldn’t believe that Ashton had remembered that night after the football game.

“No…that was the first time they ever messed with me” he felt Ashton’s hand falling from his cheek and he missed it already.

“Well I can tell you right now that it will be the last time” and Calum trusted him. There was just something so honest about Ashton’s eyes “I never even got you name” Ashton said suddenly as he started to close the first aid kit.

“It’s Calum”

“I’m Ashton”

“I know” Calum smiled a bit and he seen that Ashton did too.

“What were you doing here after school for?” Ashton asked curiously.

“My art teacher said I could stay after and finish my project. I was just leaving when I ran into…you know” Calum looked down but he could feel Ashton’s eyes on him still “And thanks again…”

“I guess I always just seem to be at the right place at the right time” Ashton chuckled a little and Calum smiled as he still looked down at his lap. He still didn’t understand why the most popular boy in school was helping him for the second time but he loved it. He loved the feeling of someone care for him and couldn’t even remember the last time he felt this warm feeling. He didn’t want it to go away.


	21. Luke

Luke was tapping his leg in an impatient way as they all sat in the library. He kept glancing at the clock just waiting until it was time to leave so he could go see Michael. He still couldn’t believe that this was his life now; him being excited about seeing Michael. Just a week ago he would dread the moment that Michael would come up to him because it meant that Michael was going to bug him more about going on a date. Now Luke loved the idea of going on a date with Michael. He just loved being around him and he couldn’t believe how much had changed in such a short while. He couldn’t help but feel like there was a reason Michael wouldn’t take “no” for an answer; it was like Michael just knew that they were meant to be together. Luke smiled at himself for that sappy thought and then focused back on the guy in front talking.

“We’ll just continue this next Monday” he spoke and Luke almost got up and cheered with how happy he was. This was also new to him; wanting to get out of a photography class meeting. He loved photography class so this was strange that he would rather go see someone instead; that someone being Michael. Luke collected his things and stood up and seen a few strange glances from people. Usually he would stick around for an hour or so after the meeting was finished but not today. He had somewhere much better to be.

He slipped out of the library and began walking down the silent halls. The quietness of the school after classes let out was kind of always creepy but it was also kind of comforting too. Luke began to whistle a tune as he basically skipped down the marble floors. He wondered if Michael would kiss him on his front door step like he had the other day and he actually felt himself blushing. There was also a chance that Michael would want to come in his house too and they could spend extra time together. Luke wasn’t exactly ready to go any further than kissing and some touching (he was still a virgin) but knows he would want to do those other things with Michael at one point. He just trusted him.

As Luke was just about to pass the main office that was off of the gym he noticed that the door was wide open which was strange. He also heard laughing coming from somewhere inside. Luke figured it was none of his business anyways and it could easily just be the janitors but he felt himself standing right outside the door. There was another laugh suddenly and it was pretty obvious that it was a boy. Luke bit at his lip and figured that he should be heading home to meet up with Michael but another part of him was curious as hell to know who was in there. He looked down the hallways both ways then slipped inside. As he walked more into the office he could see that the nurses’ office door was open which was even stranger. It wasn’t like that was a cool hang out spot or something.

He got closer to the door and the voices were getting louder and then he was rounding the corner. Luke stood frozen in the doorway and the first person he looked at was Calum who was sitting up on the counter. They didn’t notice him at first but then Calum was smiling and looking over at him but the smile was immediately gone and Luke felt his heart sink when he seen Calum’s face. Luke was then looking over to the other boy which happened to be Ashton Irwin. What the hell was Ashton Irwin doing with Calum Hood? He didn’t even know that they knew each other. Luke noticed that Ashton was looking at him with a shocked expression on his face then he was rubbing at his face and briefly looking to the ground. Luke focused back on Calum and finally was able to speak.

“Calum….” Luke said weakly and that had Ashton looking back up at him “What happened?”

“A few guys from my team” Ashton spoke instead and Calum seemed to relax. It was pretty much the only time Luke had heard Ashton speak to him. His voice sounded a lot softer than he remembered “They ummm….did this to him” Luke was a bit confused as to why Ashton was having trouble talking and it seemed hard for him to focus on Luke for very long. Luke looked back to Calum instead.

“Well that doesn’t surprise me” Luke grumbled “Most guys on that team are total pieces of shit” and he felt Ashton give him a double look.

“You’re right…they are” Ashton nodded as he glanced out the window then looked back to Calum “But they won’t be doing it again” his voice was more stern this time and Luke seen Calum smile a bit as he looked down. Luke wasn’t sure why he was getting this feeling but it felt like he was intruding on something here with Calum and Ashton.

“Are you gonna be okay though?” Luke said still hovering in the doorway as he spoke to Calum. He seen Calum looked confused for a few seconds, like he was confused that Luke was talking to him, then he just nodded and Luke didn’t miss the way that he seemed to get closer to Ashton and Ashton stepped closer to him too.

“Well…alright” Luke backed up a bit and just felt so out of place here. Ashton looked up at him quickly when Luke was getting ready to leave. Luke was feeling that funny feeling in his stomach again when Ashton was flicking his eyes all over his face like he was trying to commit him to memory. Luke bit at his lip and turned around to leave, not being able to stand it any longer but then he stopped. He felt this sudden burst of courage right then “Umm…” Luke turned around and now both Calum and Ashton were looking at him “Me and my bo-“were him and Michael boyfriends yet? “Me and my friend were going to head up to Pizza Sam’s if you guys wanted to you know...meet us there” Luke really had no clue what he was doing. It’s not as if he was friends with Calum or Ashton and knowing Michael he probably didn’t even like Ashton at all.

“Yeah” Ashton said quickly and Luke smiled without even knowing it “I mean…” Luke watched Ashton look back to Calum and Calum was nodding quickly “We’ll go” Ashton shrugged as he looked back to Luke.

“Great” Luke smiled again “We usually sit at the 2nd table next to the window just in case you guys beat us there”

“Okay…” Ashton nodded and Luke noticed that he bit at his lip and looked to the floor almost looking…nervous? No there was no way Ashton Irwin was getting nervous around him “Sounds good” he seemed to be back to himself as he looked at Luke again and Luke nodded before glancing at Calum once more and leaving. He had just invited the most popular guy in school and the guy he used to like (he still might like him...he wasn’t sure) to have pizza with the guy he liked now. Luke felt himself getting dizzy as he left the office. This couldn’t possibly end well.


	22. Ashton

Ashton felt like he could breathe again once Luke had left the room. He had actually talked to him. It wasn’t exactly ideal since it didn’t last long and they weren’t exactly having a friendly conversation but Ashton was just talking whatever he could get. He couldn’t help but notice that Luke was extra focused on Calum, which was to be expected, but it was as if they knew each other but it was more one sided like Luke felt like him and Calum were friends but Calum didn’t feel the same way. It was very confusing to Ashton.

“Are you and Luke uh…are you guys friends?” Ashton just had to ask.

“No...that was actually the first time I’ve talked to him” Calum looked to the doorway.

“Well he seemed to know you” Ashton chuckled a bit and Calum nodded.

“That was weird…wasn’t it?” Ashton knew that when Calum said “it” he meant that entire situation with Luke and he nodded.

“Really weird” Ashton agreed “You know...we don’t have to go if you don’t want to. I can just take you home” it wasn’t like Ashton didn’t want a chance to see Luke again, because he did, but he knew that friend that Luke was talking about was Michael. Seeing them together just broke Ashton’s heart and he didn’t know if he could deal with seeing them together again.

“No wanna go” Calum said quickly. He almost sounded excited and Ashton smiled.

“Alright…but are you okay to walk?” Calum was then jumping down from the counter and Ashton seen him wince in pain a bit but then he was smiling.

“I think I’ll be okay” Calum said confidently. Ashton felt like there was a reason that Calum really wanted to go meet Michael and Luke but Luke couldn’t be the reason he wanted to go since Calum didn’t even talk in front of him. Ashton noticed that Calum didtn talk in front of too many people and he felt himself smiling at the fact that Calum talked around him. He felt like it meant that Calum trusted him and Ashton liked that.

*

It turns out that Ashton and Calum did get to the pizza place before Luke and Michael. It felt strange to be sitting next to Calum on one side of the table but Ashton didn’t want to make Calum sit by someone he didn’t know since he seemed to be pretty guarded around new people. They both just got orange pops and chuckled to each other when they both said “I’ll just have an orange pop” at the same time. They were not skimming the menu’s in silence as Ashton kept looking up, not being able to wait to see Luke again.

“Is your leg feeling better?” Ashton asked softly as he looked over to Calum. He knew it hadn’t been very long so there was no way the pain was absolutely gone but he just hated knowing that Calum was still in a large amount of pain.

“Yeah a little” Calum looked up to Ashton was confused when his heartbeat picked up a bit with their faces being so close together. Ashton smiled then watched as Calum smiled back then went back to looking at the menu. Ashton kept frantically looking around just expecting to see Luke when he looked up but he never did. 10 minutes had passed and Ashton was actually started to get worried. What if this was all some sick joke? What if Luke somehow knew that Ashton liked him and just did this to mess with him? Ashton rubbed a hand through his hair and looked out the window, trying to calm down. He couldn’t let himself get too worked up about this. He should have known this was too good to be true.

“Sorry we took so long” a beautiful voice said and Ashton was turning to see Luke smiling at him. Ashton began to think that it was a good thing he was sitting because surely his legs would have given out on him after seeing that. Having Luke actually smile at him was such a simple thing but Ashton loved the feeling it gave him. He smiled back and then Luke was slipping into the seat. It was then that Ashton stopped focusing on Luke and watched as Michael sat down next to him. It was making Ashton almost..upset at how close Michael sat next to him. He tried not to think about the fact that they could be holding hands under the table.

“Umm...don’t worry about it” Ashton said to Luke and Luke gave him another smile. If Luke kept smiling at him Ashton felt like he wouldn’t make it back to his house alive.

“Oh this is Michael by the way. If you guys don’t know him” Luke said gesturing to the blue haired boy next to him. Ashton decided to do the polite thing and he reached over to shake Michael’s hand. Michael hesitated a bit in taking it and Ashton raised an eyebrow then he took it and gave Ashton a small nod. Ashton felt like for some reason Michael didn’t like him. There was no way he knew that he liked Luke though right? Ashton had to calm himself down because there was no way in hell he knew. Ashton hadn’t told anyone about his feelings for Luke. Just then Ashton was checking in on Calum and he looked like he was in pain as he looked at Michael.

“And this is Calum” Ashton said to Michael because it was obvious that Luke already knew him. Ashton watched Michael do a very obviously forced smile then went back to looking down at the menu and Ashton let out a huff as he looked back at Calum. Calum looked hurt from Michael’s lack of friendliness towards him and Ashton scooted closer to him for some reason. He just always felt the need to comfort the boy.

Sometimes Ashton felt like it was his job to watch out for the boy and make sure know one hurt him. Ashton smiled to himself as it felt like he was getting somewhere with making Calum feel better as Calum got even closer to Ashton so that their thighs were touching. He looked over to the brown haired boy and seen that there was a small smile on his face. Ashton counted it as a good sign. He thought that he’d look away by now but he kept starign at the boy. He noticed the way that the mascara on his eyes were making his eyelashes look longer and he from this close view he could see the very light pink tint on his lips. Before this Ashton had never known any boys who wore make up but Ashton loved the way it looked on Calum.

“What do you like on your pizza, Calum?” Ashton didn’t understand why, cause he doesn’t think he’s ever been mad at Luke for anything, but he had to stop himself from groaning when the blond spoke to Calum.

“Umm…” Ashton took a double look at the boy and couldn’t believe he was actually talking to someone who wasn’t him “Bacon” he said so quietly that he wasn’t even sure Luke heard him across the table.

“Me too” Luke smiled at him and Ashton’s anger for him was gone. He liked how gentle Luke was with Calum. He was glad that Luke picked up on the fact that he had to be like that with Calum if he wanted him to talk “Bacon okay?” Luke said speaking to Michael nodded, still not looking at him. Ashton thought to himself that maybe Michael was mad with Luke and that was the reason he was being so distant with everyone else.

“Bacon’s fine” Michael said in a fake happy voice and Ashton knew that voice. Piper would do it all the time when she would act like she wasn’t mad at him. Ashton suddenly thought back to when Luke took a photo of him and Connor after the game. He remembered how excited he was and how sad he was when Luke had left. Now he had Luke right in front of him and he couldn’t even think of what to say. This whole situation, for some reason, felt very uncomfortable and Ashton just felt like something was very off. He just couldn’t put his finger on what it was.

“So, Luke” Ashton suddenly spoke up and it had Michael looking up at him even before Luke was. He could feel Michael glaring at him like he was just daring Ashton to talk. Ashton bit at his lip then looked back up to see Luke looking at him with a friendly smile. It knocked off his train of thought for a few seconds “How long have you been into photography?” it was such a stupid question but Ashton had nothing else he could bring up. It was the last interaction they had. Ashton couldn’t exactly say “So do you still write like you did in 6th grade?” because there was no way that Luke remembered that and plus it would be weird to bring something like that up.

“How’d you know I was in photography?” Luke tilted his head in confused a bit and it was quite possibly the cutest thing he’s ever seen. Of course Luke wouldn’t remember it though. Ashton only remembered it because he basically remembers everything that Luke does.

“Oh umm…you took a picture of me and my friend at the game last Friday”

“Oh that’s right” Luke nodded and smiled as he glanced out the window “Well I’ve been taking pictures since I was really young but I didn’t start taking it seriously until freshman year”

“Well I’m sure you’re great at it” Ashton said sincerely but then he felt stupid for giving the compliment when Luke took a double look at him then he felt Michael’s glare on him again. Luke was then looking down at his lap.

“Guess you can see for yourself” before Ashton could ask what he meant Luke was putting his phone in front of his face and there was the picture that Luke took of him and Connor. It was actually a really good picture and Ashton could see it was his real smile. It was his real smile just because Luke was near him “I always save my pictures to my phone”

“Looks good” Ashton nodded at him and Luke seemed to really like the compliment.

“Thanks” Luke seemed to blushing as he rubbed the back of his neck. Ashton didn’t miss the way Michael rolled his eyes away from them. Michael really didn’t like him and Ashton could feel it radiating off of him. He didn’t seem to like Calum either and that upset Ashton more than anything. There was no way Calum had done anything to make Michael not like him. Soon the waitress was coming and Luke was ordering their bacon pizza. Ashton also remembered how much Michael talked to Luke during in class and now he had barely said a word. He wished Michael would just stop being so distant because he was the one making this whole situation so awkward.

Now that the menu’s were gone he had nothing to look for and Ashton watched him as he looked up and snaked up above the seat so that his arm was above Luke but it wasn’t touching him. At least Ashton knew they weren’t holding hands under the table and that made him feel better. That comforting feeling went away when Ashton looked over to Calum and he had that pained look on his face as he kept flicking his eyes from Luke to Michael. Ashton knew there was for sure something he was missing here. Something was going on that he was unaware of and that was what was making everything uncomfortable.

“What was the project you were working on after school?” Ashton said quietly so only Calum could hear. Ashton had his elbows on the table as he watched Calum smile then he was taking out his phone.

“I’ll show you” Calum sounded so excited and Ashton would have asked him about art a long time ago if he would have known it made him so happy. Calum was then putting his phone in front of Ashton’s face. Ashton smiled as he looked at the painting of a garden. It looked like something he had seen in art museums in movies. It was incredible and Ashton smiled as he shook his head in disbelief.

“That’s fucking amazing, Cal” Ashton didn’t even realize he used the nickname until he looked up from the phone and saw Calum biting his lip then he was hiding his smile behind his other hand that had his sweater wrapped around it. Ashton made himself look away because of the fuzzy feeling he was getting in his stomach. When they were just smiling back at each other like that it had felt like they were the only ones there. Ashton kind of wished they were.

“Umm…you draw?” Luke said in a shy voice and it was obvious that he was had been listening. He had probably been watching them too and that made Ashton feel a little bit exposed.

“It was a painting” Ashton spoke up when Calum didn’t. Ashton could see clearly that Luke really wanted Calum to talk to him, why? Ashton wasn’t sure, but he just felt the need to speak for Calum since it was obvious that Calum was shy around new people. Calum seemed thankful for it as he let out a breath and slumped back in the seat.

“Oh..that’s cool” Luke was trying so hard to get Calum to open up to him and Ashton actually felt bad for him “Maybe you could draw one of my pictures for me…I mean if you wanted to” Ashton looked to Calum because unfortunately he couldn’t talk for him this time.

“Yeah” Calum looked up and nodded at Luke “Sure” Luke smiled wide and it seemed like it was the best thing he’s ever heard. Ashton’s head really was all over the place because he felt a sting of jealously, wishing that Luke would smile at him like that. Just a few seconds ago he was fondly looking at Calum and thinking of how beautiful he was and now he was jealous because Luke was giving Calum attention and not him? Ashton felt himself getting dizzy at all the different thoughts going through his head. He needed to get it together.

*

When the pizza finally came Ashton was glad for it because he was starving but also because it gave him something to do instead of just staring at Luke. After one piece Ashton was taking a few sips of his soda and finishing it.

“What’s your favorite topping on pizza?” said a soft voice beside him and Ashton looked to see Calum looking at him. This had really been the first time Calum had spoken to him first and it made Ashton smile wide.

“Pineapple” Ashton chuckled out when he seen Calum make a grossed out face.

“Michael likes Pineapple too” Luke spoke up as he pointed a thumb at Michael taking a bite of pizza “I can’t stand it” Luke said looking at Calum. Luke was then sticking his tongue out in a grossed out manner and it had Calum giggling.

“Me either” Calum was grinning behind his sweater sleeve. Ashton loved seeing him smile but he also thought it was the cutest thing in the world when Calum was feeling so shy that he felt the need to hide his smile. They all had a few more slices and then Ashton was going to grab his wallet out of his pocket.

“I got it” Luke spoke as Ashton was about to take out his money and Ashton raised his eyebrows. It made Luke smile and bite at his lip and Ashton felt like he accomplished something “I invited you guys. I can at least pay for the pizza”

“If you insist” Ashton said casually as he looked out the window. It was now starting to rain and tiny droplets were hitting the glass. Ashton seen Michael getting his coat on and then Luke was doing the same so Ashton did too. Ashton helped Calum get one of his arms in this coat sleeve after it seemed like he was struggling and him and Calum both laughed before Calum finally properly got his coat on. Ashton felt eyes on him and glanced up to see Luke fondly smiling at Calum but then he was shaking it off when he looked at Ashton. They all got out of the booth and Ashton felt Calum get close to him so that their arms were touching. Ashton almost wrapped an arm around him but quickly told himself that it was probably too soon to be doing stuff like that.

“Well I guess we’ll see you guys around” Luke said flicking his eyes between Calum and Ashton.

“Yeah” Ashton chuckled. Him and Calum were in front of the doors so they had to leave first. Ashton seen that it was raining harder now and he put Calum’s hood up for him, making the boy giggle when it went over his eyes and Ashton pushed the hood back on his head before looking back to Luke “See ya guys” Luke had this pained expression to his face but Ashton knew there was nothing he could do about it expect for smile at him and hope it would make Luke feel better. Luke smiled back at both him and Calum and then Ashton was leading them into the rain.


	23. Calum

Once they got out of the rain and into Ashton’s truck Calum watched Ashton shake at his hair and Calum laughed when a few droplets hit his face.

“Did I get you?” Ashton smiled a little at Calum as he started his car and Calum just laughed again before looking out the window. Calum’s mind went to other things though as they started driving. He remembered how Ashton seemed to get nervous whenever he would talk to Luke. He was also wondering why Michael had barely said a word the whole time. Calum kept thinking about that fake smile Michael gave him and even thought it was still beautiful he still would have preferred a real one. Calum felt stupid but every time Luke would try to talk to him he kept wishing that it was Michael instead. He still didn’t understand Luke’s want to talk to him and he didn’t understand why Ashton was the same way with Luke. It was as if they all wanted something they weren’t getting and it made Calum dizzy. Something was going on between the four of them but he just didn’t know what.

“Ashton?” Calum spoke and Ashton instantly looked at him.

“Yeah?” Calum knew this wasn’t his business but he at least needed to try and figure out what had been going on back there. It was driving him crazy.

“Do you like Luke?” Calum felt like he got his answer when Ashton seemed to turn pale then he was looking back to the road.

“Yeah…” he said after a few seconds “Yeah I like Luke but he’s with Michael…there’s nothing I can do about that” Ashton shrugged but Calum knew it was hurting him because it was hurting him too; just in a different way.

“Well I like Michael” Calum spat out and it felt so good to get it off his chest. He trusted Ashton.

“You do?” Ashton looked shocked and Calum nodded “Jesus….this is kind of crazy. No wonder it was so awkward”

“But Michael likes Luke” Calum felt himself getting depressed then Ashton was letting out a chuckle.

“Well I think Luke likes you”

“W-what?”

“He kept trying to talk to you…it’s obvious that he likes you, Cal” there was the nickname again and Calum felt his stomach do flips every time Ashton used it.

“I’m sorry” Calum said looking down at his lap but he could feel Ashton’s eyes on him.

“What?” Ashton said “What are you sorry for?”

“I’m sorry that he likes me…cause you like him and all”

“Hey” Calum looked up at him, knowing that Ashton wanted him to “Don’t be sorry. This whole situation is pretty fucked up but we can’t control who likes who”

“Yeah…I guess” Calum rubbed a hand through his hair and felt Ashton’s eyes still on him.

“You must see something in Michael that I don’t see though” Ashton mumbled, almost to himself as he clicked on his blinker “He seemed pissed off about something”

“Do you think he was upset with me?” Calum couldn’t help but have that thought but Ashton was instantly shaking his head.

“No. He actually seemed mad at me…I don’t think he liked that I was there. I feel like there’s something to this whole situation that we aren’t seeing” Calum nodded in agreement. There was for sure things that were left out. Right then Calum looked over to see Ashton looking anxious. It seemed like something else entirely though.

“Are you okay?” Calum almost whispered and his heart sunk when he seen Ashton shake his head.

“I’m breaking up with my girlfriend today…” Ashton let out a breath like he had been holding it in the entire time they’d been in the car.

“You don’t love her anymore?” Calum felt like he was asking too many questions but he couldn’t help it.

“I don’t think I ever did” Ashton said right away “Love shouldn’t feel like you’re suffocating and that’s what I feel like when I’m with her”

“You deserve better then” it was all Calum could think of to say but it was so true. There are certain people that are just genuinely good people and Ashton was one of them. He looked up from his lap to see Ashton smiling at him before focusing back on the road. They were pulling onto Calum’s road but Calum really didn’t want to leave Ashton. He felt so warm inside whenever Ashton was around. When they pulled into the driveway Calum tried not to let out a depressed sigh. They sat in silence for a few seconds and Calum hoped that Ashton didn’t want him to leave either.

“Can I see your phone?” Calum handed it to him no questions asked. Calum watched as he typed away at it then he was handing it back “Just text me if you ever need anything alright?”

“I will” Calum wished that Ashton and him could just hang out at his house; Calum wanted that so bad “Thanks” Calum felt the need to say and Ashton just smiled at him.

“Did you have fun though?” and Calum nodded “I mean besides the fact that Michael was kind of being an asshole” Ashton mumbled a bit when he said that last part and Calum laughed.  
“He’s not usually like that”

“Yeah in Chemistry class he practically talks Luke’s ear off” and Calum could sense the jealously in his voice and by the look on his face. Right then Calum seen his mother looking through the kitchen window and he figured he should get inside.

“I did have fun though” Calum wanted so badly to say “can we do it again?” but he had to remind himself who Ashton was. He was the most popular guy in school and Calum figured he had better things to do instead of hanging out with him.

“Good” Ashton flashed him another one of his smiles “I did too”

“Bye Ashton” Calum said opening the door and he felt Ashton flip his hood over before he got out. Calum felt his cheeks get red.

“See ya, Cal” Ashton shot out and Calum turned to see his one arm resting on the steering wheel as he grinned. Calum would didn’t even care about the rain; he would stand in the rain all day if it meant he got to look at that smile of Ashton’s.


	24. Luke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of chapters today so let me know what you think! I love the comments :) Follow me on [tumblr](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/) if you want and also I would love you forever if you shared this fic on tumblr. You can reblog it [here](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/post/140297207704/lost-hearts-cliffordaffliction-5-seconds-of) and thank you for everyone who has stuck by this fic <3 It means so much.

They had been sitting in silence in Michael’s car for what seemed like hours. Luke could only hear the sound of the rain hitting the car and the sound of his own heartbeat in his chest. 

“Can you at least talk to me? I don’t even understand what you’re upset about” Luke made sure to sound as nice as possible. He just wanted to understand. 

“Do you still like Calum?” Michael finally looked at Luke but Luke felt like just getting out of the car and running into his house. It was right there so he could easily do it. 

“What are you-“

“Luke cut it out” his voice wasn’t harsh but Luke knew he was upset “I know that you liked him before…I just want to know if you still do” Luke looked down to his lap and twirled his fingers together. 

“I don’t…I don’t know” Luke mumbled and it was true. He was confused as to what was going on in his head right now. He looked at Michael and knew that he had feelings for him but he got the same feeling when he looked at Calum. 

“You don’t know?” Michael seemed close to tears now and Luke hated it. He wanted to make him feel better “How can you not know, Luke? You either have feelings for him or you don’t. It’s not that complicated” 

“Okay I do!” Luke could feel tears running down his cheeks and he snuffled and wiped them away “I do still like him but I like you too” He looked at Michael “I really like you, Michael…I’m just confused right now okay?” 

“Luke….” Michael let out a breath and rubbed a hand over his face “How can you like us both? What, do you like Ashton too?” now it felt like Michael was mocking him and Luke felt so hurt. 

“No” Luke said instantly but that answer felt like poison coming off his lips. He remembered the way he saw Ashton being so caring and gentle with Calum and was jealous that he couldn’t be like that with Calum but he also wanted Ashton to take care of him like that too. His brain was a total mess and it was killing him “I mean...I don’t think so” Luke knew he was just making things worse and Michael groaned. 

“Jesus Christ” Michael said as he let his head fall onto the steering wheel “Well Ashton likes you…that was pretty fucking clear” 

“Wait…what?” Luke was so confused. 

“Ashton likes you. I seen it…I seen the way he looks at you. It’s not hard to tell” Michael seemed like he was in such pain as he kept closing his eyes and it was making Luke feel sick. Luke reached a hand out and pet it through Michael’s hair. Michael closed his eyes and then Luke was scooting over in the seat and kissing Michael’s cheek. Luke felt his heart break when Michael let out a breath and his head fell onto Luke’s shoulder. Michael seemed so emotionally exhausted and Luke couldn’t blame him; he felt the same way. It felt so right though; just the two of them sitting in the car with the sound of the rain outside. Luke kept putting kisses to his hair and grabbed one of his hands to rub his thumb against. 

“This is all really fucked up isn’t it?” Luke already knew the answer to the question but he felt Michael nod against him “Well who do you like?” Luke said with a smirk and he figured Michael could hear it in his voice. He knew Michael had when he sat up to look at Luke. 

“What do you mean?” Michael raised his eyebrows “I like you, Luke” 

“I know but who else do you like?” Luke was just trying to test the waters a bit; seeing if Michael would admit that he liked one of the other boys. 

“Calum’s pretty cute” Michael shrugged like it was no big deal but Luke gasped out of pure happiness. 

“Isn’t he? And the way Ashton was taking care of him was so sweet” Michael starting chuckling into his hand as he shook his head. 

“What are we doing, Luke? I mean this isn’t how it’s supposed to be…you’re supposed to have feelings for one person and one person only. We seem to have feelings for several people” 

“I don’t really know what it means…but I think we should find out” Luke smiled a bit and Michael looked downright confused. 

“What are you implying, Lucas?” 

“I just think we should get to know them better; see what happens” 

“Okay” Michael said like it was painful “I just don’t want to lose you” he looked up this time and Luke could see the pain in his eyes. 

“You’re not gonna lose me” Luke promised and he kissed his cheek then his forehead “Okay? I promise” Michael nodded and leaned their foreheads together. 

“And I’m sorry I was a dick today…I just couldn’t stand the way Ashton was looking at you” 

“It’s okay” Luke leaned forward and gave him a peck on the lips “I kind of like that you get jealous though” Michael smirked and brought them into a more heated kiss as he put his hand in the back of Luke’s hair. Luke couldn’t help but let out a moan when Michael started kissing him slow but hard at the same time “Wanna come inside?” Luke said against Michael’s lips and Michael nodded “My parents aren’t home” Michael smiled wide at that and they both stepped out into the pouring rain. 

They giggled as they ran up to the front door before Luke was unlocking it and they were stumbling inside. Michael was then shaking his wet hair right in front of Luke’s face making Luke push him away and they were slipping off their shoes. Before Luke could do anything else Michael was pressing him against the door and connecting their lips again. Luke wrapped his arms around the top of Michael’s shoulder and brought him even closer as Michael gripped his hands on his hips. Luke was then jumping up a bit and wrapped his legs around Michael’s waist and Michael moaned and licked into his mouth. Their wet clothes rubbing against each other were a bit uncomfortable and Luke wished they didn’t have any on at all “My r-room” Luke stuttered as Michael grabbed at his ass. 

“Where is it at?” Michael laughed and Luke did too. 

“Upstairs…4th door” Michael nodded and they started walking up the stairs with Luke still wraped around him. Luke kissed at Michael’s neck and felt goosebumps forming there as Michael carried him to his room and soon Michael was setting Luke right in front of his bed. 

“I’m not putting you on your bed all wet” Michael smiled and Luke nodded as he started to get rid of his clothes and then Michael was doing the same. Luke licked his lips as he stared at Michael’s beautiful pale torso but he didn’t have time to look long cause Michael was pressing him down into the bed and instantly kissing up and down his neck. They were only in their boxers now and Luke could feel Michael’s hard dick against thigh. Luke got lower on the bed so that their dicks were lined up and then he started rubbing up into Michael, causing him to let out another moan and bite at Luke’s neck then he was licking at the same spot. Luke started rubbing his hands up and down Michael’s back as he couldn’t get enough of touching his skin. Michael went back to kissing Luke’s lip and used one hand to rub through the back of his hair in a comforting manner. Luke was sighing at how good it felt then Michael’s lips were gone from his as he watched Michel begin to trail his lip down his stomach. When Michael got right above Luke’s boxers he licked a few times at the sensitive skin there and Luke shivered as he lifted himself up, wanting more “Is this okay?” Michael looked serious for a moment and Luke nodded. 

Michael started to rub Luke through his boxers as he left open mouth kisses on his lower stomach and Luke felt like he could come at any second. Someone else touching him like this was all new and he never imagined it would feel this good. Finally Michael began pulling his boxers down and Luke didn’t miss the way Michael licked his lips when he seen Luke’s dick. Luke thought it was the hottest thing he’s ever seen. 

As soon as Michael started to suck on his tip Luke was letting out a breathy moan and pressing his head back into the pillow. Michael started kitten licking at the tip then he was making his tongue flat and licking all up Luke’s shaft, making Luke shake and grip the bed sheets. He knew for sure this wasn’t Michael’s first time doing this and that made him sad but he tried not to think about it. It was easy to stop thinking about sad things when Michael took all of Luke’s dick in his mouth so that his nose was touching Luke’s skin. He came back up and licked the top a few times before going back down and getting a steady rhythm going and Luek was moaning almost constantly. If he wasn’t moaning then he was still heavily breathing and shutting his eyes, trying not to come yet. He wanted to last as long as possible. He knew he wasn’t going to last much longer when Michael sped up the pace an starting sucking harder, making Luke begin to shake. Luke ran a hand through Michael’s hair. 

“F-fuck…Michael fuck, I’m gonna-“ he cut himself of not even being able to talk and watched as Michael went up and down on his dick and soon Luke was hitting his orgasm as whimpers came from his mouth. Michael started pressing kisses all up and down Luke’s still shaking thighs and Luke put a hand through his own hair as he closed his eyes “Fuck...that was so good” he said out of breath. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you swear so much” Michael chucked with his lips still pressed to Luke’s thigh “I like it” Luke smiled wide at him then Michael was getting on his knees after he got his own boxers off then he was starting to jerk himself off and Luke watched in awe for a few seconds before he snapped out of it and sat up to help Michael; he just needed to touch him. Luke pushed Michael’s hand away and starting twisting his hand like he knew he liked himself and Michael seemed to like it as he let his head fall on Luke’s shoulder and Luke started kissing Michael’s shoulder as he sped up his hand. 

“Fuck, Luke…almost there” he said in a rough tone into Luke’s skin and Luke shivered as he felt himself almost getting hard again at how hot Michael sounded. Soon Michael was coming all over their stomachs and Michael wiped them off with his shirt before Michael was falling on Luke and they were both getting under the blankets. Michael started putting kisses on Luke’s neck and Luke felt so comforted. 

“That was my first time doing anything like that” Luke whispered and Michael picked his head up to look at him. 

“It was?” he asked softly and Luke nodded “Well I’m really happy it was with me” Michael leaned down to give his nose a kiss and Luke giggled as he wrapped his arms fully around Michael’s back and held him tight. 

“Me too” they began to just slowly kiss until Michael was giving his cheek a peck and then burrowing his face into Luke’s neck. The last thing Luke remembered before falling asleep was the sound of Michael’s steady breathing and his hand rubbing through Michael’s hair.


	25. Ashton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Its the chapter where Ash dumps Piper yay! lmao that's all this chapter is but it's something that had to be done (don't worry she's gone for good and it will be all about the boys from now on) I'll be adding a couple more chapters today as well though.

Ashton sat in his car as the rain came down even heavier than before. He was sitting in front of Piper’s house and kept telling himself that he just needed to go inside and get it over with. He had to put himself out of this misery. He was trying to think of some sort of plan about how to go about this but he couldn’t stop thinking about Calum. Thinking of how natural it felt with Calum beside him in his car. He kept looking over to the passenger seat like he was going to be able to see Calum there if he stared hard enough. He kept thinking of the way Calum would laugh into his sweater sleeve and the way his eyes would light up whenever Ashton talked to him. He kept thinking about the little things too like how the mascara on his eyelashes made his eyes seem bigger and how there always seemed to be a pink tint on his cheeks. He had the cutest cheeks and Ashton doesn’t think he’s ever thought that about anyone.

He remembers how badly he wanted to lean over and kiss them whenever Calum seemed like he was closing himself off and getting shy. Ashton took a deep breath and tried to stop the thoughts. The sooner he broke things off with Piper the sooner he could maybe take things further with Calum. That was the thing though; Ashton didn’t even know if Calum liked him back. Calum liked Michael. Ashton liked Luke but he also liked Calum so maybe it was possible that Calum could like two people as well. Ashton’s thoughts were cut off when he seen a few lights flicking on downstairs and he decided to just go for it.

When he got to Piper’s front door she answered and crossed her arms as she was in just a tank top and a pair of pajama bottoms.

“What’re you doing here?” she didn’t sound mad but she sounded confused; Ashton couldn’t blame her.

“I needed to talk to you” Ashton shivered a bit as the wind blew and he just wished she would let him in already. Soon she was stepping back and urging him to come inside. He took his shoes off even though he hoped he wouldn’t be staying long “Let’s go up to my room” there was something about her tone that he didn’t trust.

“No…I mean let’s just stay down here” there have been other times when Ashton had tried to talk to her and she just lured him into having sex with her instead but that was not going to happen this time. Ashton would make sure of it. She just shrugged and sat Indian style on the couch and Ashton sat right next to her. He had never had to do this before so he hoped he wouldn’t fuck it up. They had been together for a while so it wouldn’t be easy.

“I’m sure you know why I’m here” Ashton could swear that she knew because she had been avoiding him so much. It would be easier if she already kind of figured what was coming next.

“Yeah” she nodded while looking down at her hands and Ashton felt a little relieved “You wanna talk about what will happen when you go off to college next year and I think we should just try the long distance thing” Ashton felt his stomach drop and he was shaking his head.

“Piper…no” he said as he ran a hand through his hair “No…that’s not what I wanted to talk about”

“Then what is it?” she had that sad look on her face but Ashton had to be strong. This was really what was best for the both of them. They couldn’t carry on like this when Ashton no longer had feelings for her “I came here because I think we should break up” it felt like millions of pounds have been taken off of Ashton all at once and he could finally breathe again. Piper obviously didn’t feel the same as she put a hand over his mouth and closed her eyes as she had her head facing towards her lap.

“Ashton” she whimpered and Ashton couldn’t help but put an arm around her and gently rub at her back.

“I’m sorry, Piper…I just don’t feel the same way as I did when we first started this” right then it was like she got shocked and she quickly looked at him with wide eyes.

“Is there someone else? Have you been cheating on me?” her crying only got worse after that and Ashton could barely even understand her.

“No, I didn’t cheat on you…Jesus Christ” Ashton wouldn’t ever cheat one someone no matter what.

“Then there’s someone else?” Ashton thought back to the brown haired boy who had eyes like a puppy and made him just want to hold him forever. He also thought back to the blond boy who had a smile that sent shivers down his spine.

“Y-yeah…there’s someone else” Ashton whispered as he looked away from her.

“Well I hope she makes you happy, Ash” she actually sounded so sincere and Ashton wanted to correct the pronoun she used but he held his tongue.

“Yeah…” he drifted off and took his arm back to set it on his lap “I’m sorry”

“Have you wanted to do this for a while?”

“Mhm” Ashton nodded. He just wanted to go home.

“Why didn’t you do it sooner then?” she was still staying calm but it was actually making Ashton kind of nervous. It was like the calm before the storm.

“I didn’t…I didn’t know how to go about it. I’ve never done this before”

“Just…” she stood up and it was as if she was an entirely different person. He should have seen this coming “You aren’t thinking straight! Okay? I’ll see you tomorrow and everything will be back to normal”

“Piper…We’re done. I mean it” Ashton made sure to be stern this time and she started to cry again as she shook her head.

“You don’t mean it” she kept saying over and over. Ashton was beginning to lose it a bit. He felt so overwhelmed.

“I do mean it” he stood up and thought about just running out the door and not looking back “Piper…we’re done”

“Just fucking leave then!” and Ashton jumped. He didn’t need to be told twice and he turned around as he was fast walking towards the door “Wait no…Ash I didn’t mean it!” Ashton had his hand on the doorknob as he could hear her getting closer “Please stay. I’m sorry”

“Have a nice life, Piper” he said dryly and then he was walking out as he could hear here still whimpering. It was done. He did it.

Once he got to his car he let his head fall to the steering wheel and he could breathe again. He was finally free and it felt so good. He could move on with his life and actually be with someone he was happy with. He hoped that person he could be happy with was Calum but he also wanted Luke as well. Now that he actually knew that he could have a relationship with someone else he began to realize how messed up his head really was. He had feelings for two people and one of them wasn’t even available. He wasn’t even sure who he wanted to be with more because he actually felt like his feelings for Calum and Luke were the exact same. He of course liked them for different reasons but in the end he had the same type of feelings for them. He had some serious things to work out in his head but right now sleep was the number one thing he wanted to do. Sleep would temporarily solve all these problems and Ashton drove home practically falling asleep at the wheel with how emotionally drained he was. He hoped tomorrow would be better.


	26. Michael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A longish Muke chapter yay!

The sun was out for the first time in what seemed like months as Michael sat against the tree with Luke’s head on his lap. Usually Michael always had lunch detention but he had been behaving better and showing up on time for class just so he could spend lunch with Luke. It was safe to say that Luke was making him a better person everyday and Michael actually loved it. He looked down to the blond boy who was gazing up at the sky and Michael started to pet a hand through his hair again as he watched Luke let his eyes close.

Michael felt like he could sit here with Luke for hours and he wished he could. Michael started to run a hand down Luke’s cheek and the boy pressed his face further into Michael’s touch. The blue haired boy couldn’t stop thinking about how beautiful Luke was and still couldn’t believe that the boy was his to hold anytime he wanted. Michael’s fingers drifted lower on Luke’s face and then Luke was turning his head, with his eyes still closed, as he kissed Michael’s fingers and Michael was so in love. He was feeling it so strong that he almost said the words out loud but he knew it was too soon. Once Luke was done kissing his fingers Michael moved his hand back up to his hair and gently began rubbing his fingers through it again.

“What’s your favorite?” Luke said looking up at the sky again.

“What’s my favorite what?” Michael chuckled and moved his other hand to rest on Luke’s tummy.

“What’s your favorite cloud?” Luke was pointing upwards now and Michael looked up as well.

“Well what’s your favorite?”

“That one right there” Luke pointed to the right of them “The one that looks like a face” Michael did have to admit that it looked like a face and began looking at the others.

“I like that one” Michael pointed straight up above them “It looks like a spiral” Luke just hummed and took Michael’s hand that was on his stomach and laced it with his own. Michael loved holding hands with Luke; loved how Luke was never ashamed to hold his hands in the hallway or give him kisses before class. Michael loved everything about the blond boy and seemed to fall even harder for him every day.

“Did you mean what you said last night?” Luke suddenly said as he rubbed a thumb against Michael’s fingers.

“About what?” Michael looked down at him and Luke looked up.

“About the Calum and Ashton thing” and Michael was afraid that was what he was going to say. He didn’t really know what they were exactly planning to do but he just knew that he couldn’t lose Luke.

“I don’t know…I mean I guess” was all Michael could think to say.

“We won’t do it if you aren’t comfortable”

“I don’t even know exactly what we’re doing, Luke” Michael chuckled a bit. He still really didn’t know what Luke was implying they do.

“Well in computer class I had some spare time so I looked things up about it…” Luke started to bite at his lip “It’s called Polyamory. It’s when people are in a relationship that involves more than two people” and Michael felt himself getting nervous. He didn’t know what he was expecting but he for sure wasn’t expecting that “I don’t even know if Ashton and Calum would be up for it but we could at least try to be friends with them first. You know…see what happens”

“Yeah…if that’s what you want to do” Michael tried to sound confident about it but knew he had failed when Luke sat up and faced him with a concerned look.

“Michael be honest with me; we don’t have to do it if you don’t feel comfortable” Luke grabbed his hand again and laced them together. He began to think back to the way Luke kept trying to talk to Calum and the way Ashton kept looking at Luke. He also didn’t miss the way Calum kept flicking his eyes over to him as well and the way Calum and Ashton were with each other. Maybe this could work. Michael was okay with it as long as he still had Luke in the end; even if it didn’t work out with Ashton and Calum.

“I’ll do it” Michael nodded and this time he was being honest. Luke smiled and leaned forward to kiss him softly as he put both hands on his cheek. Michael sighed into the kiss and then leaned their foreheads together “This is the craziest idea ever but it might be just crazy enough to work” Luke smiled wide at that and started kissing Michael all over his face and then Luke laid down on top of him as he rested his head on Michael’s chest.

“When we were all together like that it just felt like we were all connected…you know?” Luke leaned up to look at Michael’s reaction and Michael did have to agree with him there. Even though he was upset with how Ashton was staring at Luke he still felt like he shouldn’t have been mad at him, like Ashton had the right to look at him like that too. He also remembered fondly looking between Ashton and Calum whenever they would talk.

“I did kind of feel something between us all” Michael admitted and Luke looked so excited as he nodded.

“It just feels like the universe is trying to bring us all together” Luke said honestly and Michael laughed “I’m serious like what were the odds that I would walk by the office just as Ashton and Calum were in there?”

“Pretty slim I suppose” Michael rubbed at his own jaw and looked past Luke “If this does work though I gotta say that I’m not too good at sharing, Luke. Like prepare for me to get super jealous”

“Well” Luke got a smirk on his face and Michael could already feel himself getting turned on “I happen to think you look really hot when you get jealous” Luke pecked his lips then started putting kisses down his jaw.

“Luke” Michael groaned “I really don’t feel like going to class with a boner”

“You won’t” Luke mumbled into the skin on Michael’s neck s he started rubbing his hand up the boys thigh.

“Uh I will if you keep fucking touching me” Michael softly pushed him back and Luke made a pouting face as he sat back on his heels in the grass.

“Let’s go the top floor bathroom then…hardly anyone uses that one” and at first Michael didn’t know if he heard him right.

“Um what? Does Luke Hemmings want to skip class?”

“Yeah” Luke shrugged innocently “I wanna touch you” he started pouting again and Michael already knew he was going to give in.

“Well what are we still doing here?” Michael cocked a grin and started to stand up then he was grabbing Luke’s hands to help him stand up as well. Michael couldn’t believe he was about to get off with Luke in the upstairs bathroom at school. He must have been dreaming.

*

They were jogging hand in hand in the top levels hallways and giggling like a couple of school girls. Michael was still in shock that they were actually doing this and he began to think that maybe Luke wasn’t as innocent as he lead onto be. For one they were about to get each other off in school and just a few minutes ago Luke got an idea to try being in a 4-way relationship. He for sure wasn’t as innocent as he thought and Michael liked that.

Michael hadn’t had a class up here since sophomore year so he actually had no clue where the bathroom was. Luckily Luke took the lead and soon they were getting to the hallway where the bathroom was. Luke was opening the door then stepping back.

“After you” Luke said with a wink.

“Classy” Michael chuckled “Opening the door for me before I’m about to get you off in a bathroom stall” Michael walked in and made sure to look under all the stalls for any sign that someone else was in there with them. When Luke got in and closed the door Michael was a bit disappointed to see that there was no lock on the main door. It meant that they would have to quick and also quiet. It was evident by last night that Luke was not quiet at all during sex but Michael would have to keep him quiet somehow. Suddenly Luke was pulling Michael into the nearest stall and pinning him against the wall as he started putting open mouth kisses all up and down his neck.

“Someone’s eager” Michael did a low chuckle and put his hands under Luke’s shirt to start rubbing up his stomach “Who corrupted you like this?”

“You did” Luke said into his skin before licking at it a little. Michael could feel himself getting harder by the second.

“This was your idea” Michael said plainly, not like he was complaining...like at all. 

“Yeah but it’s still your fault” Luke smiled a little into his skin as he started sucking on Michael’s adam’s apple. Michael could already feel the marks begin to form and he loved it.

“Yeah? How so?”

“You’re just so beautiful” Luke’s voice was changed now to a more soft one and Michael felt his cheeks heating up “Can never keep my hands off you”

“Fuck, Luke” Michael moaned out at his words but also because Luke started to palm him through his jeans. Luke was pulling his jeans down quicker than Michael expected then he watched with wide eyes as Luke got down on his knees and removed his boxers before licking at the head. Luke was then looking up at Michael seeming slightly nervous.

“I’ve never done this before” his voice shaking a bit.

“It’s okay” Michael pet a hand through his hair and already felt like he could come with Luke gripping his thighs and his hot breath on his dick. Luke took a deep breath then started just sucking on the tip and moving his fist up and down Michael’s shaft. Michael let his head fall back against the stall just from that little amount of touching and he was already so close. Soon Luke started using his tongue, circling it around, and this time Michael couldn’t help but let out a loud moan.

“Fuck fuck fuck” He whispered as he felt the pleasure pooling in his lower stomach. Luke began to take more of him in and Michael had to force himself to not buck up when Luke moaned around him “Yeah? Do I taste good?” Michael teased a bit as looked down at Luke and rubbed the back of his hand on his cheek. He didn’t expect Luke to nod and moan around him again. Michael was losing his mind over how hot this whole situation was.

He had almost forgotten that they were in a bathroom. Luke started to pick up the pace and Michael was a whimpering mess as he threw he head back again and lightly pulled on Luke’s hair. He knew Luke liked it though by the muffed moans coming from his mouth

“You’re doing so good, Luke. Fuck …so good” Michael praised him as he softly ran a hand through his hair now and he really wished he could kiss him. He always wanted to be kissing Luke but he also didn’t want his mouth to leave his dick because of how amazing it felt. Michael knew he was close when he felt his legs starting to shake and Luke sped up as he started to use his tongue more every time he would come back up to the tip. Michael swore that Luke was a natural at sucking him off and that was another thing that surprised him. Luke was so eager for it and Michael never would have guessed he would be like this. The more Michael thought about, the more it got him going “Luke I’m gonna-“ he let out a loud moan as a shot of pleasure went through him and then he was coming down Luke’s throat. He was breathing heavy as he closed his eyes and Luke pumped his hand on him until Michael was whimpering from being oversensitive.

Luke stayed down on the floor and leaned his head against Michael’s thigh as he lazily started to palm himself “Come here, Lukey” Michael mumbled and realized that was the first time he ever said that but he liked it. Luke stood up and Michael was still out of breath but he quickly slid Luke’s jeans and boxers down, knowing that Luke was close.

Luke sucked in a deep breath when Michael got a hand on him and started jerking him off in a fast pace. Michael couldn’t help but connect their lips together as he could taste himself on Luke’s tongue but he didn’t mind at all. He used his other hand to start rubbing one of Luke’s balls in between his finger and it had Luke letting out a loud moan into his mouth. Michael smiled into the kiss and started kissing him more fiercely as he started twisting his hand.

“M-Michael” Luke whimpered as he moved so their foreheads were resting against each other and Michael just stared at him as Luke kept gripping his hair all over and closing his eyes. Luke let out one loud moan then he was coming between them “Shit” Luke kept muttering as he was now resting his head on Michael’s shoulder and Michael was rubbing a hand through his hair. Somehow that was even better than last night and Michael had a feeling that every time they did this it would just get better. He smiled and kissed the side of Luke’s face before cleaning them up a little


	27. Ashton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think of these chapters! :) Follow me on [tumblr](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/) if you want!

Ashton couldn’t focus on English class because he kept wondering where Calum could have been during lunch. He ended up just sitting with his friends inside and pretended not to see Michael and Luke kissing by the tree outside. He thinks his heart actually shattered into a million pieces when he seen Luke putting kisses down Michael’s neck. He wanted that so bad and it gave him chills just thinking about Luke doing that to him.

He let out another breath as he watched the clock on the wall. It was dead silent because the class was supposed to be reading but Ashton now had the book face down on his desk. He just couldn’t stop thinking about Calum…and then five seconds later he would start thinking about Luke. It was this never ending cycle and it was driving him nuts. These boys were quite possibly ruining his life since it was obvious that he couldn’t think about anything else.

He was surprised when he even found himself thinking about how Michael kept rubbing his hands up and down Luke’s back during lunch. He wasn’t sure where that thought came from but he quickly brushed it away. Being in love with two boys was already driving him insane so the last thing he needed was to bring another person into it.

He looked back up at the clock and seen that there was still more than a half hour left of class. Ashton didn’t exactly need to go to the bathroom but he could just walk the halls a little just to get out of the class room and kill sometime. He wasn’t one of those kids who asked to use the bathroom everyday so he knew his teacher would let him.

Soon Ashton was walking out of the class room swing the hall pass that was actually just a rope thing that was meant to be a dogs toy. Ashton began whistling a bit as he walked down the silent halls. As he was coming to the end of the hall he thought he heard voices and a door shut but he decided to brush it off as he rounded the corner. What he didn’t expect was to come into contact with a something hard and then he was rubbing his forehead as he must have hit something. Ashton actually felt a little dizzy as he looked down at the floor.

“Shit, are you okay?” a soft voice said and Ashton knew that voice. He looked up so fast that he thought he’d get whiplash then he was looking into a pair of concerned blue eyes.

“Yeah…m’ fine” Ashton mumbled rubbing his forehead a bit. He felt like he would actually have a bruise and seen that Luke was rubbing his forehead as well. Ashton looked past Luke and seen the blue haired boy looking at him strangely. His look wasn’t filled with hate and jealously like at the pizza place but Ashton still didn’t know what kind of look it was.

“Are you skipping class too?” Luke suddenly asked and Ashton chuckled as he shook his head.

“No but I’m surprised you are” maybe Ashton was wrong but he swore Luke seemed like one of those kids who always showed up for class on time. Ashton was then looking to Michael like he just knew it was Michael who put Luke up to skipping class.

“It wasn’t my fucking idea” Michael said defensively and Ashton looked back to Luke and raised his eyebrows.

“Yeah…” Luke shrugged but Ashton could tell he was getting nervous “I umm…wanted to show Michael the drawings on the stalls in there. Some of them are actually really good” Ashton looked back to see Michael rolling his eyes and Ashton had to suppress a laugh. He also couldn’t help but notice the red marks all over Michael and Luke’s necks.

“Drawings huh?” Ashton said in a smart ass tone. He had no clue where this boost of confidence was coming from but it was probably because he knew Luke was totally talking out of his ass.

“Y-yeah. You should look at them while you’re in there” right then he seen Michael walking backwards a bit away from them as he laughed.

“Luke you were right about that whole universe thing…Jesus Christ this is starting to get weird” Ashton noticed that Michael looked at him when he said that last part and he was utterly confused on what he meant “I’ll see you him Chemistry, Luke” Ashton looked back to see Luke nodding then when he looked back at Michael he seen the boy widening his eyes and nodding his head towards Ashton like Michael wanted Luke to talk to him. Ashton furrowed his eyebrows and looked back to Luke for answers but then Luke was just smiling shyly.

“I guess I’ll let you…” Luke pointed his thumb to the bathroom and he seemed so much more shy without Michael standing next to him “Go in there” Luke spared him one more smile then he was turning to walk away.

“Wait” Ashton couldn’t believe he was actually able to move his mouth. Usually when it came to Luke he was speechless “I was actually gonna use the 2nd floor bathroom. It’s just a bit more sanitary” Ashton shrugged and was surprised that he was able to make up a lie so fast.

“Sanitary?” Luke smiled a bit and Ashton felt himself blushing.

“Yeah…It’s a shame I’ll have to miss all those beautiful drawings in there though” Ashton said gaining his confidence back and it had Luke giggling into his shoulder as he looked away.

*

They were now walking down the stairs and Ashton kept trying to think of something, anything, to say in order to get Luke to start talking. It wasn’t every day that he had Luke to himself and actually the thinks this is the first time they’ve ever been completely alone. There was so much pressure to try and take advantage of this rare moment but Ashton couldn’t even speak as he watched Luke walk down the stairs in front of him.

“Does your forehead feel better?” and Ashton wanted to kick himself for how stupid that question was.

“Yeah” Luke laughed and his voice echoed a bit down the stairway. He looked back for a brief second “How’s yours?”

“I think I’ll pull through” Ashton said in a dead serious tone and it had Luke laughing again. Ashton loved hearing him laugh and being the reason for it was even better.

“Well thank God” Luke said still laughing and Ashton felt himself smiling wide “Don’t know what our football team would do without their star player” Ashton honestly thought the conversation would go in a different direction and he tried not to look too miserable as Luke looked at him as they got to the bottom of the stairs.

“I think they’d be just fine” Ashton said quietly and he seen Luke shaking his head as he disagreed.

“Well here we are” Ashton looked over to see that they were standing in front of the 2nd floor bathrooms. That meant that this moment alone with Luke was over and Ashton felt himself getting depressed “The more sanitary bathroom” Luke smirked like he knew Ashton had been lying all along but Luke had lied as well so Ashton didn’t feel too bad.

“Yeah” Ashton looked up at him and started rubbing the back of his neck “Guess I’ll see ya” Luke looked like he was going to turn around and start walking away but then he was just staring at the floor like he was thinking of saying something else.

“Listen…I was going to hang out at Michael’s house after school and I was wondering if you and Calum would want to come?” Luke said it all so fast that it took Ashton a second to process what he had even said.

“Yeah” Ashton said probably too fast “I mean I’ll have to ask Cal but I’m sure he’ll want to” if Michael was there then Ashton was sure that Calum would want to go but he kept that to himself.

“Great” Luke smiled wide then he was walking closer to Ashton again “Can I see your phone?” Ashton handed it over right away and looked at Luke’s face as he typed away at it. Luke’s skin looked so soft and Ashton had to bite his lip to stop himself from reaching out and touching him “There” Luke handed his phone back and Ashton looked at the address in the Notes of his phone before he put his back in his pocket “Guess I’ll see you then” all Ashton could do was nod at his words then Luke was turning away. Ashton already missed him but he had to tell himself that he would see him soon.

“Nice hickey’s by the way” Ashton shouted down the hallway and he seen Luke rub at his neck and could have sworn he heard the boy mumble a “damn it” Ashton didn’t even know why he said it but he felt proud of himself for actually teasing the boy a bit. Ashton did feel the need to piss at that second and he quickly walked into the bathroom, not being able to hide how excited he was to see Luke after school. Things were finally starting to look up for him.


	28. Calum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to wait a couple of days to post this chapter but..fuck it. This is the Cashton chapter that I've been dying to post for you guys so I hope you love it cause I think it's so cute and I honestly have no clue how my cold heart comes up with sappy shit like this lmao I love the comments so let me know what you think :)

Calum was a little depressed as he dug in his locker after school was over. He hadn’t been able to talk to Ashton all day and he didn’t really realize how much of an impact the boy had on his mood until he didn’t get to talk to him. Sure they had Chemistry together but they were forced to get into groups for the entire hour so Calum never got to talk to the curly haired boy. He did notice the couple times Ashton smiled at him though and it gave him a warm feeling every time he did. He feels like his life would be ten times better if he was able to be around Ashton more and actually hang out with him on a regular basis. Calum hoped they would get to that point someday where they would just hang out at each others houses. Calum’s never really had that with anyone and he’s also never met anyone quite like Ashton.

“Hey” Calum felt that warm feeling as he felt a hand lightly hit his back and he turned to see Ashton leaning against the locker next to his “I was looking for you at lunch today” he was smiling wide like always and it never failed to leave Calum feeling breathless.

“You were?” Calum had to make sure he heard him right. Ashton Irwin was looking for him and wanting to see him? He doesn’t think he would ever get used to that.

“Yeah” Ashton said happily as he nodded.

“I was in the library” Calum shrugged. That was where he had gone for lunch for years merely because it was quiet and also he just loved to read. Being in a loud lunch room stressed him out and he also didn’t like eating around a bunch of people he didn’t know.

“Do you mind if I join you tomorrow?” and Calum was so relieved that Ashton didn’t think he was weird for going into the library at lunch.

“Y-yeah” Calum nodded fast and this was the best things he’s ever heard. Ashton actually wanted to spend lunch with him “I’d like that” he knew he was blushing and he also couldn’t wipe the smile off his face even if he tried.

“Great” Ashton did smile where his smile lines showed and Calum had such a strong urge to lean forward and kiss him “I also got some good news” and Calum felt like this was his birthday or something.

“Yeah what?” he knew the excitement was in his voice.

“Luke” Calum didn’t miss the way Ashton’s face lit up even more when he said the boys name “asked me if we wanted to come over to Michael’s after school”

“M-Michael’s house?” Calum practically whispered. Why was all this good stuff happening to him all at once? Did he do a good deed that he was unaware of?

“Yeah I ran into Michael and Luke coming out of the bathroom on the upper level” Ashton rolled his eyes away “Turns out Luke is not as innocent as I thought” that had Ashton smirking a bit and so Calum smiled too. Suddenly something occurred to Calum and he wanted to get Ashton’s opinion on it.

“But…why do you think Luke is all of a sudden asking us to hang out with him?”

“Yeah” Ashton nodded and briefly looked away when some kid with glasses tripped over his own feet “I was wondering that too but I doubt it’s anything to worry about” Calum just nodded. Luke didn’t seem like the type of person to play some cruel trick on anyone “I’ll only go if you do though” Calum looked back up at Ashton and felt even more fondness for the boy.

“I’ll go” Calum really was excited about this and he knew nothing bad would happen as long as Ashton was there with him. Ashton just made him feel so safe.

“Michael seemed to be acting better today but if he’s an asshole like he was yesterday we’ll leave okay?” Ashton always spoke so soft and Calum loved it. It was another reason why he felt so safe.

“Okay” Calum smiled while biting his lip. He hoped it didn’t come to that but he liked that Ashton didn’t want him to be around Michael if he was being unfriendly like he was yesterday.

“Do you need to go home first?” and Calum was about to say no but he kind of wanted to look a bit more presentable when he seen Michael. He just always had the need to impress Michael and he especially did now because he knew Michael would for sure notice him. Calum nodded then he was following Ashton out of the school and towards his car.

*

They were sitting in Calum’s driveway and Calum was unbuckling his seatbelt when he looked up to see Ashton looking a bit nervous.

“Do you want me to just wait out here or?-“

“You can come in” Calum smiled at him and Ashton returned it before he was unbuckling as well. It felt strange having Ashton walk next to him as they got closer to his house just because Calum couldn’t even remember the last time he had someone come over to his house. He knew his mom wasn’t home so at least he wouldn’t have to worry about her smothering Ashton. When they stepped onto the front porch Calum held the door open for Ashton then they both took their shoes off in silence.

Calum walked up to his bedroom with Ashton trailing behind him and he started to try and think of what he was going to wear that looked better than what he had on. He only had on a simple white t-shirt and he knew he had to find something else that might catch Michael’s eye. When they got up to Calum’s bedroom Calum looked back to see Ashton eyeing his room with a smile on his face and Calum walked over to his closet before starting to look through it a bit.

“Did you paint that?” Ashton’s curious voice said and Calum turned around to see him pointing at the painting of a carnival next to his window.

“Oh…yeah” Calum blushed and then Ashton was looking at him.

“It’s really good, Cal. You have a really amazing talent” and that only made Calum’s cheeks get more pink.

“Oh umm…thank you”

“Jesus. Wish I had a talent like that” he heard Ashton mumble and Calum really didn’t like Ashton thinking that he didn’t have a good talent because he did.

“But you do” Calum turned away from his closet and faced the boy sitting on the edge of his bed “They way you play…you’re crazy good Ashton” he felt himself getting happier when he seen Ashton biting his lip and smiling as he looked down at his hands clasped together on his lap.

“I don’t know if I would call that a talent” Ashton sounded so insecure and Calum had never seen this side of him. He hated that Ashton thought the way he played wasn’t a talent.

“Well I would” Calum said confidently and Ashton smiled as he looked down again. Calum started looking through his closet again and finally found a grey sweater towards the back. It was pretty simple but it was one of Calum’s favorites. He took it out then started walking to the bathroom that was right off of his bedroom “I’ll be right back” Calum said to Ashton over his shoulder and he seen the boy nod.

Once Calum took his t-shirt off he stared at his naked torso in the mirror and ran his fingers down his tan skin wishing that he didn’t look like he did. He’d always hated his stomach for some reason and it wasn’t like he ate a bunch of junk food so he wasn’t sure why it looked so misshaped. He was sure that Ashton’s stomach was perfect and his mind started to drift to another place as he pictured running his hands up and down it. He bet that Ashton’s whole body was perfect and Calum had to swallow hard and shake his head before putting the sweater over his head. Now was not the time for these thoughts when they were already supposed to be at Michael’s house by now.

He looked at himself in the mirror again and fixed his hair a bit so that it was pushed back then his eyes flicked to the basket of nail polish’s on top of the toilet. He glanced down at the chipped polish on his nails and sighed. It wasn’t like Michael would even notice his nail polish but Calum still felt the need to put it on. He dug through the basket and finally found a silver colored one that would match his sweater. The silver color had sparkles in it and he loved how it looked on his nails. He quickly used the nail polish removed to get the remaining polish of his nails then took the new silver nail polish bottle and held it in his palm before opening the door. He figured he should ask Ashton if he even had time to put nail polish on because he wasn’t sure if Ashton told Luke that they would be there at a certain time.

“Umm…” Calum spoke quietly and Ashton looked up from his phone “Do I have time to paint my nails?” Calum didn’t know why but he was afraid that Ashton would judge him for painting his nails because he’s had other people who thought that it was wrong for a boy to want to paint his nails and wear make-up but Ashton was different and Calum didn’t even know why he was afraid of what the boy would think.

“Of course” Ashton said with a smile and patted the bed next to him. Calum almost cried with how grateful he was of Ashton. He practically skipped over to the bed and sat down next to the boy. He had never painted his nails or put on make-up in front of anyone in fear of being judged but Calum found himself not being scared at all about doing this in front of Ashton.

He sat cross legged facing Ashton, only being a few inches away from touching him, as he opened the nail polish and began to apply the polish to his first nail on his left hand. His left hand was the easiest to paint since he was right handed so he always found himself doing that one first. He could feel Ashton’s eyes flicking from his face and then down to his hands as he painted his second nail but knew Ashton wasn’t looking at him in a negative way. He could even see the boy smiling a bit.

It was silent as Calum finished painting his left hand nails but it was a comfortable silence. He hoped Ashton didn’t think it was awkward but Calum just always had to concentrate when he did this. He still messed up a lot and he wanted them to look perfect.

“Doing my right hand is always a little harder” Calum chuckled a bit and it made Ashton look up at him. He acted like he wanted to say something as he kept opening and closing his mouth so Calum stayed focused on him.

“Umm...I’ll do it. If you want” and at those words Calum felt like his heart was going to beat out of his chest. Not only was Ashton totally okay with Calum wanting to paint his nails but now he wanted to help him with them? Calum swears he fell in love with the boy right then.

“Y-yeah” Calum nodded fast “You can” Ashton smiled wide at his answer and then Calum was handing him the bottle of polish. Ashton seemed so excited to do this and Calum just couldn’t stop smiling at him. How did he get so lucky? And he also wished that Ashton would have come into his life a lot sooner but now was better than never. Calum doesn’t know how he even survived without having Ashton around and tried not to get too attached to the boy but he knew he already was.

When Ashton lightly grabbed Calum’s hand and set it on his lap Calum got that butterfly feeling in his stomach but he also felt it everywhere else too. Ashton’s touch was just so gentle as he swiped his thumb across the top of Calum’s index finger and Calum actually felt like he wasn’t even breathing. Ashton dipped the end of the brush on the tip of the bottle a few times before he started painting the first finger but then Calum was looking back up to Ashton’s face. He looked like he was really concentrating and he looked so cute.

Calum remembers the first time he painted his nails and they looked terrible because he couldn’t keep his hand steady but Ashton was doing a great job. He had just finished the 2nd finger and Calum felt his stomach flutter every time Ashton would touch his skin with his thumb. Calum hoped he wasn’t imagining it but Ashton seemed to be touching him more than what was necessary but Calum loved it and he didn’t want this little moment of theirs to end. Ashton stuck out his tongue in concentration as he started on the third finger. He still had his hand resting under Calum’s hand as he kind of held Calum’s hand in place and Calum got goosebumps when the boy rubbed the tips of his fingers across his wrists with his free hand. Calum doesn’t think anyone has ever been this gentle with him and being here like this with Ashton made him feel like no one could ever hurt him again.

He found himself getting sad once Ashton only had the thumb left and watched as Ashton brushed the polish over his nail as he still held Calum’s hand with his free hand. Calum began to think of what it would feel like to hold hands with Ashton. They were almost there if Calum would just close his fingers down on Ashton’s hand but he forced himself not to. He didn’t want to do anything that might ruin this moment. His nails were all finished and he watched Ashton put the brush back in the bottle.

Calum thought this moment was done and he tried not to be too depressed but then Ashton was bringing Calum’s hand up a bit higher and lowering his head a bit. Calum’s eyes widened a bit when he felt Ashton’s warm breath blowing down on his wet nails. Was this a dream? Would Calum wake up and realize that none of it was real? He sure felt like that. Ashton’s breath on his skin gave him the good kind of chills and Calum had to resist letting out a whimper. Ashton’s eyes fluttered up to look at Calum for a brief second as he smiled then he blew on his nails a few more times before setting Calum’s hand back on his lap.

“Do they look okay?” Ashton asked casually like what he had just done hadn’t totally made Calum fall for him even more.

“Yeah” Calum said breathlessly as he didn’t look away from Ashton’s face. He then decided that he should at least look down at his nails and see how Ashton did. They looked even better than his left hand and Calum gasped a bit “They look great. Have you done this before?” Calum raised his eyebrows’ at Ashton and Ashton chuckled as he nodded.

“Yeah. I’ve got a younger sister” and that explained it. Calum knew there was no way in hell that was Ashton’s first time painting nails. All Calum could do was smile wide then Ashton was looking back down to Calum’s hand that was still on his lap. Ashton brushed his thumb against the top of Calum’s hand and Calum swore he never wanted Ashton to stop touching him “It’s a really pretty color. Looks great on you” Ashton looked up when he said the compliment and Calum bit at his lip at hopes of not blushing as hard.

“T-thanks” and when Calum said that he was saying thanks for everything that Ashton has done for him. If Ashton only knew how much he had actually helped him. These past few days with Ashton in his life had been the happiest Calum’s ever been and with Ashton by his side Calum knew he would be okay.


	29. Luke

Luke had been sitting on Michael’s couch just watching Michael clean up a few things before Calum and Ashton came over for the past 10 minutes. He didn’t know why he was nervous but he just was. He just really wanted to talk to Calum and he was hoping that Ashton and Michael would get time to talk as well. It’s not like Luke was going to simply say “Hey let’s all date and see what happens” but he knew eventually he would have to tell Calum and Ashton what him and Michael had been talking about and that made him even more nervous. The idea was pretty crazy and it wasn’t exactly a normal thing. Not to mention that Luke was pretty sure that Ashton wasn’t even out of the closet yet and they would have to keep the whole thing a secret for his sake. Luke groaned when that thought entered his brain because that hadn’t even occurred to him until now.

“What are you huffing and groaning about over there?” Michael said standing up straight and throwing a few chip bags away.

“Nothing” Luke simply said but he knew Michael wouldn’t buy it.

“Yeah well you’ve barely said anything since we got out of school” Michael started to walk over to Luke and took a seat next to him on the couch. Luke had to admit that his nerves went down a bit with Michael so close to him now “Seriously, what happened with Ashton after I left you guys in the hallway?”

“Nothing. I just invited him and Calum over”

“Yeah I know that but that’s all you’ve told me” Michael gently ran a hand through the front of Luke’s hair and Luke closed his eyes at the touch.

“He knew we were messing around in the bathroom” Luke mumbled but it only earned a chuckle from Michael.

“Yeah? What did he say?”

“When I was walking away he said ‘nice hickey’s by the way’” Luke said even quieter than before and he knew he was blushing this time. Michael died laughing though and Luke glared at him out of the corner of his eye.

“Oh come on…it’s funny”

“It was embarrassing”

“That can’t be what you’re stressing out about though” and Michael was right. Luke really wasn’t thinking about that.

“No” Luke shook his head and then Michael was leaning in to give him kiss on the cheek. He leaned against Luke and kept his lips there until Luke started talking again “This whole idea we have; about all of us dating. When we have to tell Calum and Ashton they’ll probably think we’re crazy. There’s no way they’ll agree to it” Michael let out a breath and grabbed Luke so that the blond was sitting on his lap with his back to Michael’s chest. Luke giggled a bit when Michael started placing sloppy kisses all over the back of his neck and ticking his sides a bit. Once Michael stopped Luke leaned back into him.

“For some reason I have a feeling they won’t be as opposed to it as you think. You’re just over thinking it”

“Maybe” Luke closed his eyes and actually felt like he could fall asleep with how comforting Michael’s hand was under his shirt rubbing against his tummy.

“Don’t worry about it. Besides, it’s not like we have to tell them today” Luke turned his head and nodded against Michael’s neck “And when the time to tell them does come, if you want, I can be the one to ask them” Luke widened his eyes a bit and looked back at Michael.

“But it was my idea, Michael. You shouldn’t have to ask them”

“I know…but I can if it makes things easier” Michael spoke softly against the skin on his neck and Luke did a sigh of relief.

“Thank you” Luke whispered as he switched positions so that he was straddling Michael and leaning his head on his chest “Why are you so good to me?” Luke couldn’t help but say. For months he had been quite the asshole to Michael and not even giving him a chance and now Michael was acting as if none of that even happened. Luke sometimes felt like he didn’t even deserve Michael. If only he would have seen how sweet Michael was before then he knew he would have fallen for the blue haired boy a long time ago.

“Cause you deserve it” Michael said into his hair and Luke sat up so he could look at him. Michael wiped the hair off his forehead and cupped his cheeks “You deserve the fucking world, Luke” he said it sternly like he was trying to force Luke to believe it and Luke felt his eyes getting wet then soon he felt Michael wiping tear from his cheek and leaning forward to kiss that same spot. Luke let his body fall into Michael’s chest again and held him tight as Michael rubbed at his back and kissed the top of his head. Luke felt so loved, he actually knows that he’s never felt this loved in his entire life. He also knows that he’s never fell this hard for someone this fast and sometimes it worried him but right now in Michael’s arms like this he knew nothing bad could come out of it. If he fell Michael would be there to catch him and Luke would do the same for him. He just wished he would have realized all of this sooner.

*

A couple minutes later Luke and Michael were still in the same position and Luke was actually starting to fall asleep until the doorbell rang throughout the house.

“Are you gonna be okay?” Michael made sure before he made Luke get off his lap so he could answer the door.

“Y-yeah” Luke wiped at his still red eyes a bit then kissed Michael’s lips gently before standing up. Michael urged him to sit back down on the couch and made sure to put a blanket over him before going to answer the door.


	30. Michael

As Michael made his way towards the door he couldn’t help but feel a bit nervous himself but for a different reason than what Luke was feeling. Last time Michael hadn’t been very friendly towards Ashton or Calum and was feeling bad for that. He hoped they didn’t assume he was like that all the time and he took a deep breath before opening the door. He found himself smiling when his eyes went straight to Calum who was wearing black coat and grey sweater as he bit at his lip and looked up at Michael.

“Hey guys” he stepped over a bit as he looked at Ashton standing close to Calum as he quickly nodded at Michael “Come in” he made sure to be as friendly as possible to make up for how he was at the pizza place and then Ashton and Calum were walking in. When Ashton walked in after Calum Michael got a whiff of his cologne and Michael couldn’t help but feel a bit dizzy with how good it smelled but quickly shook it off and lead them into the living room. Luke was still curled up under the blanket and Michael watched Ashton’s eyes instantly go right to him like he knew they would. Michael was a bit surprised when it didn’t bother him like it did before which he knew was a good thing.

“Hey, Luke” Ashton said and then Luke was instantly turning his head to see them.

“Hey you guys made it” Luke smiled wide and turned so that he was fully facing them. Luke’s friendliness towards them wasn’t forced like Michael’s was and Michael was so glad for it. It wasn’t like he was happy they were here but he just didn’t know them that well and he was bad around new people. Luke didn’t know them well either but he was just naturally a people person. Ashton and Calum were then sitting on the couch next to Luke’s and then Michael was sitting next to Luke as he started flipping through the channel. Michael thought it was cute how Calum seemed to really depend on Ashton and just followed his every move.

“You’re neighbor seemed like a pretty….interesting guy” Ashton said and Michael laughed and then he was looking over to see Ashton’s eyes on him.

“What was he doing this time?” Michael said still smiling.

“It looked like he was trimming his trees in his underwear” Ashton said and Michael could tell he was unsure if he really saw what he thought he saw.

“Yeah he does that every day at about this time” Michael looked up to see it just starting to get dark out “He does shit way more weird than that though”

“Like what?” Ashton laughed again and Michael couldn’t help but fondly stare at the way his smile seemed to even show in his eyes.

“Oh umm…” Michael stuttered a bit and had to look away “Last week he was sunbathing on the roof…naked” Luke started to giggle into his shirt sleeve and Michael looked over to see Calum laughing as well.

“Jesus Christ” Ashton shook his head as he wiped a hand over his mouth.

“Yeah it was pretty disturbing”

“We can go spy on him” Luke sat up and seemed so excited.

“Let’s not” Michael put up a hand and Luke instantly pouted “I still have nightmares from the last time we did that”

“Oh come on. It’s funny” Luke whined and Michael shook his head.

“I’m in” Michael was surprised when Calum was the one who said that and Luke jumped off the couch in excitement.

“You can see basically every room in his house from Michael’s dad’s office” Luke said to Calum and then Calum was standing up as well. Michael’s stomach fluttered a bit when he seen Luke grab Calum’s hand and start leading him towards the stairs. Ashton was standing up then turning to smile at them as Luke led the way. Michael let out a breath and then felt Ashton’s eyes on him.

“Is it really that bad?” Ashton smirked a bit and Michael felt grateful that Ashton was waiting down here with him instead of just leaving him down here by himself.

“I still can’t get the image out of my head of him dancing in his underwear with a broom between his legs to Genie In A Bottle” Michael said in a dull tone as he stared up at Ashton. He watched Ashton get a grossed out look on his face then looked to the stairs.

“That’s fucking disgusting” he chuckled and Michael just nodded. Suddenly they heard a loud string of laughing upstairs and Michael really didn’t want to miss out on what was going on up there. He stood up and stretched.

“But there’s no way he could do anything else that would gross me out more so..what the hell” Michael shrugged and Ashton just did one of his big smiles. Michael had to force himself to look away so he didn’t do something stupid like kissing the boy. Michael began walking up the stairs and the giggling only got louder. He didn’t recognize one of the giggles so he knew it was Calum. When he rounded the corner into his dad’s dark office he could see Ashton looking around a bit in his peripheral vision.

Whenever they would spy on his neighbor they had to keep the lights off because then his neighbor would surely see them spying. The walls were lined with book cases and the only light was from the computer, casting a blue tint across the room. Luke still had the blanket wrapped around his shoulders as him and Calum sat on the window sill and Michael thought they both looked so cute as they were giggling into their hands. Ashton must have thought so too because Michael seen him fondly smiling at them as well. Michael pulled out one of the computer chairs for Ashton to sit in and then was pulling the other out for himself as he sat down in it then put his legs up on the windowsill next to Luke. Luke turned around to give him quick smile then he was back to looking out the window with Calum.

“What the hell is he doing?” Ashton said squinting his eyes and moving his chair closer to the window.

“I think he’s looking for his cat” Luke spoke up as they watched the old man look under the couch a few times then move on to checking all the lower cupboards of his kitchen.

“Why did he just look in his oven?” Ashton said plainly and Michael couldn’t help but let out a laugh.

“I told you, man, he’s fucking weird”

They all jumped sky high as the man all of a sudden yelled “Hey!” and then there was a cat running through the living room. Luke and Calum were leaning their heads against the glass as they laughed with their hands over their mouths as the man chased his cat all through the living room and into the kitchen. Michael’s stomach was actually hurting with how much he started to laugh after the man slipped on the kitchen tile and landed on his back. Now they were all erupting in laughter as the guy could barely even get up and then he started chasing the cat once again.

“Fuck” Ashton continued to laugh as he wiped the tears away from his face and leaned back in the chair. Something made Michael look over at Ashton and then Ashton was stretching his arms above his head and Michael actually felt his mouth falling open a bit at the sight of his biceps. It only got worse when Michael looked down and seen the way Ashton’s shirt was riding up on his stomach. He could see the small trail of hair that went down the center of his stomach and Michael bit his lip.

To his horror Ashton was looking straight at him when he looked up. It wasn’t like a “I caught you” look though”; it was more that he liked Michael looking at him. Ashton was flicking his eyes all over Michael’s face and then Michael looked at his arms again and then back to his stomach. When Michael looked back up at Ashton’s face he literally felt like his heart had stopped beating as Ashton had a big smirk on his face. Michael shyly smiled back and planned on looking away but he just couldn’t.

“Michael he’s got the broom again” Luke started dying laughing and Michael didn’t look away from Ashton until he knew Luke was looking at him. Luke looked confused for a few seconds as he looked between the two boys that were just having a stare off but then he got a small smile on his face before looking out the window again. Michael took his feet off the window sill and got his chair closer as he rested his elbows on his knees.

“I seen he found the cat” Michael stated and then Luke was chuckling.

“Yeah he did like 5 minutes ago” Luke turned to look at him “Weren’t you watching?” and Michael shook his head. Once Luke looked back out the window Michael turned his head to look at Ashton again but the boy was already staring at him. Ashton just had the most intense look that Michael had ever seen and he actually felt privileged that Ashton was choosing to look at him like that. The look he was giving him was actually causing Michael to shiver a bit and get that turned on feeling that he’d get in his stomach whenever Luke would touch him. All Ashton was doing was looking at him and it was causing Michael to feel like that; he wasn’t sure if he should be worried that Ashton was already having such an effect on him.

“Do you wanna a beer?” Michael finally spoke and he was mainly just asking him so that he had a reason to leave the room. He felt like if he was under the Ashton’s stare any longer that he would end up just getting to his knees and sucking the boy off. He was that turned on and he didn’t know what the hell was going on with him.

“Sure” Ashton shrugged calmly and Michael resisted rolling his eyes. Ashton was acting like he hadn’t been totally fucking him with his eyes just a few seconds ago. Michael stood up quickly and already felt like he could breathe once he was out of the dark room and away from Ashton


	31. Ashton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things start to happen...Let me know what you think! and it would mean the world to me if you shared this fic on Tumblr. The post is [here](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/post/140540470989/lost-hearts-cliffordaffliction-5-seconds-of)

Ashton had no idea what had just happened back there with Michael but all he knew was that he really liked the way Michael was raking his eyes up and down his body. He doesn’t think he’s ever had anyone look at him the way Michael was; it was like Michael was looking at him like he wanted to eat him alive but it was turning Ashton on so much to where he could actually feel himself getting hard in his pants. Just a couple of days ago he was looking at Michael like he hated him; he hated that Michael got to spend time with Luke and kiss him and touch him whenever he wanted but now that feeling was gone and it confused Ashton. He looked at Luke sitting against the window with Calum and he still got that feeling of wanting to touch him and kiss him but he no longer hated Michael for being able to do that. Ashton then focused on Calum curled up in ball as him and Luke smile out the window. That moment he had with Calum back at his house was still haunting him. Calum was practically on his lap when he was painting his nails for him and Ashton wanted so badly to pull the boy on top of him and kiss him until he couldn’t breathe.

All these different feelings that were going through his head were making him dizzy and he stood up, mainly just wanting Michael’s eyes back on him. Calum looked up when he noticed.

“I’ll be right back” Ashton spoke to Calum and then Calum was nodding but he still didn’t look away from Ashton. Ashton walked towards the door but stopped in the door way and mouthed “You gonna be alright?” to Calum. The boy smiled and nodded again then he was looking out the window. Ashton knew he would be alright with Luke since Luke knew that he needed to be gentle with him.

Ashton knew that it didn’t take that long to get a couple of beers so he had a feeling that Michael just used that as an excuse to leave the room. Ashton understood that though because he felt like he literally couldn’t breathe when Michael had his eyes glued to him. He figured Michael just needed some air. He made his way down the stairs and looked at the TV that was playing some football game before he was getting closer to the kitchen.  
That turned on feeling was completely gone when Ashton stopped in the doorway to see Michael closing his eyes and chugging down a beer as he sat at the counter. Ashton’s caring side was kicking in as he looked at the boy.

“You okay?” Michael jumped a bit when he spoke but then he set the bottle of beer down before nodding. Ashton knew he wasn’t okay though.

“I got you a beer” Michael said with a small smile as picked up the other beer bottle on the counter. Ashton smiled back at and made his way towards the boy before taking the beer and sitting on a stool next to him. He hadn’t had a drink in months but relaxed a bit when he took a few sips of it.

“Thanks” Ashton managed to get out and now he was more nervous than before, he couldn’t put his finger on why that was though.

“Listen…this whole thing that’s going on is pretty fucked up” Michael laughed a bit and Ashton agreed “I mean I know you like Luke-“ and Ashton widened his eyes at that because he wasn’t expecting Michael to know that.

“I’m sorry I didn’t-“Ashton rushed out but then Michael was smiling.

“Hey, there’s nothing to be sorry about alright? Luke likes you too” Michael said it so casually then took a few more sips of his beer but Ashton literally felt like he was close to having a mental breakdown. He had no clue what was going on.

“He what?” Ashton’s voice cracked a bit and he cringed.

“Luke likes you” Michael shrugged like he had no clue why Ashton was freaking out as much as he was.

“And why are you acting like you’re okay with it? He’s your boyfriend” Ashton spoke more loudly than he intended to.

“And it would be a bit selfish of me to keep him all to myself, don’t you think?” Michael raised his eyebrows and actually smirked. Ashton was getting that turned on feeling that he was getting upstairs but he was also couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“What are you saying?” Ashton practically whispered like he was begging Michael to tell him what he was thinking. Michael opened his mouth like he was about to tell him but then he was shaking his head and looking forward.

“Forget it. It’s too fucked up of an idea and it wasn’t even my idea; it was Luke’s” now Ashton was even more confused than before and he wanted answers.

“Tell me” and then Michael was taking a deep breath in and Ashton could feel it on his face when the boy breathed out again. It made him get chills and he really needed to get a hold of himself. This was getting ridiculous how much this blue haired boy was getting to him.

“Well it seems to me that we all have this sort of…connection with each other” Michael paused and Ashton nodded. He did have to admit that it felt like that “Well me and Luke were thinking…what if we all just dated each other” it took Ashton a few seconds to really soak in what Michael was saying but once he did he widened his eyes a bit and looked to the floor.

“That would work?”

“I think so, yeah. I mean we all like each other right?” Ashton was about to nod but then he started working it all out in his head. Before he wasn’t sure if he liked Michael but now he was sure he did. The boy had for sure pulled him in. There was another thing he wasn’t entirely sure of; maybe upstairs Michael was just looking at him because he thought he was visually appealing but that didn’t mean that Michael like him. Michael had kind of verified that he did with that last question though.

“You like me then?” Ashton couldn’t help but use his cocky tone of voice and it had Michael glaring at him a bit.

“What, are you really going to make me fucking say it?” Michael’s bad boy attitude was starting to show a bit and it had been a while since Ashton had seen it. He had to admit that it was turning him on though.

“I’m not agreeing to this whole thing until you do” Ashton kept the smirk on his face and he knew Michael was going to be stubborn about this. Suddenly Michael was getting up off the stool and walking past Ashton and Ashton panicked a bit. He didn’t want Michael going back to hating him. Michael was then stopping with his back turned as he was a few steps away from the counter.

“Your loss then” Michael threw over his shoulder then Ashton was smiling again.

“Or you can just prove it to me” Ashton spoke like he just knew that Michael wanted to and that had Michael stopping dead in his tracks again as he was in the kitchen archway. Ashton felt like he maybe crossed the line though. He barely even knew this boy for more than a couple of days and he had no clue what he was comfortable with. Michael still had his back turned and Ashton looked down to see him tapping his fingers on the beer bottle in his right hand like he was thinking it through. Michael was then looking up to the ceiling and Ashton felt like he was thinking about how Luke, his boyfriend, was right upstairs.

Ashton felt bad all of a sudden; there was something about Michael that just made him want to be rough with him and mark him all up and Ashton was letting those thoughts cloud his judgment “Just forget it. You don’t…you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to” Ashton turned his chair so that it was pressed up against the counter and facing away from the blue haired boy. His voice was a lot more softer this time and it was like he was talking to Calum instead of Michael. They way he talked to Michael and the way he talked to Calum were two very different things and it was weird to have them overlapping like this. Suddenly though Michael was turning around with a smirk on his face. When he started walking slowly closer to the curly haired boy Ashton could feel his heartbeat pick up as Michael rubbed his tongue against the inside of his cheek and it was driving Ashton crazy. Michael was then licking his lips and again looking at Ashton like he wanted to eat him alive and this time Ashton knew he was already hard and Michael hadn’t even touched him.

Ashton swallowed hard when Michael was standing right in front of him and setting his beer down on the counter. Michael was then putting both hands on the counter behind Ashton and their faces were only inches apart. Michael smiled and before Ashton even got a chance to respond to it Michael was diving forward and connecting their lips. Ashton instantly gave into it and started kissing Michael even more fiercely than what Michael was giving to him. They seemed to fight for dominance for a few seconds but then Ashton was putting a hand on the boys lower back and bringing him closer so that their chests were pressed together and Michael was in between his legs. Michael let out a stuttered breath and let Ashton lead after that.

Michael’s lips felt so soft and so just…right against his. He barely even knew this boy but here he was kissing him like they had known each other for years. Ashton let out a whimper at how good it felt to have Michael against him like this and he moved his hand to the hem of the boys’ shirt and then he was sticking it under the fabric and rubbing his hand up and down his bare stomach. That caused Michael to move his hands from the counter to grip them onto Ashton’s neck instead and Ashton felt chills go down his spine again. He moved his hand from Michael’s stomach to start softly rubbing it up and down Michael’s side, gently squeezing every now and then, and every time he did squeeze at his skin Michael seemed to stop kissing him for a second then went back to kissing him even harder than before as he whimpered.

They finally had to come back for air and Ashton opened his eyes to see Michael still closing his as he breathed heavily and went back to resting his hands on the counter. Ashton kept his hands on Michael’s sides and rubbed at the skin with his thumb. Michael was then opening his eyes and instantly smiled as both of them started to breathe normally again.

“Fuck” Michael whispered and Ashton just nodded, not even being able to form words as they still stared into each others’ eyes. So that’s what it felt like to kiss someone that you actually had feelings for. Ashton would have dumped Piper a long time ago if he knew this is how kisses were supposed to make you feel “So did I prove it to you?” Michael let out a breathy laugh and Ashton did too. Being in a relationship with more than one person was bound to be difficult at times, not to mention that he wasn’t even sure that Calum would be up for it, but if this is how happy Michael made him feel he couldn’t even imagine what it would be like to have two other boys make him feel like this too.

“Yeah….” Ashton nodded eagerly “I’m in”


	32. Calum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is still the same day so they're still at Michael's house but I just waited to upload these chapters

“I just don’t know which one to use cause in this one” Luke pointed to the left side of the screen “The lighting is better but that kids face got cut off when I edited it but in this other picture all their faces are in frame but the lighting is shitty” They stopped spying Michael’s neighbor a couple of minutes ago when it got too weird and now Luke was getting his opinion on what pictures to put into the yearbook. They were both sitting in the computer chairs in front of the bright screen. Calum kept looking back and forth between the pictures.

“I’d say this one” Calum pointed to the one with bad lighting and Luke nodded.

“Yeah that’s the smarter choice…wish I wouldn’t have messed up with editing the other one though. It’s such a good photo” Luke clicked out of it and started going through his other photos. Calum actually loved seeing all the photos that Luke has taken because he could tell how passionate he was about it “You’re probably getting bored aren’t you?” Luke laughed a bit but Calum quickly shook his head.

“No, not at all” he said honestly and it had Luke looking at him and smiling. Calum bit at his lip with how close they were but then the moment was over.

“Better see what Michael and Ashton are up to” Luke said starting to stand up from his seat so Calum did the same “They’ve been down there an awfully long time. Hopefully they didn’t kill each other or something” and Calum giggled at that. There was no doubt that Ashton wasn’t the biggest fan of Michael but Calum hoped that would change and he would be able to see how amazing Michael really was. Calum just really wanted Ashton to see Michael the way he did.  
Calum followed Luke down the hallway and as they got closer to the stairs they could hear loud laughing and Calum knew that was a good sign. Just a few days ago Ashton was calling Michael an asshole and now he was down there laughing with him; things were for sure starting to get better between the four of them. When they got to the balcony, Calum was still amazed at how beautiful Michael’s house was, they could see Michael and Ashton both sitting on the same couch as Ashton was leaning forward, pointing at the screen that was playing a football game.

“Well would you look at that” Luke chuckled and Calum could tell that Luke was glad to see them getting along too.  
When they got down to the first level Ashton and Michael both looked at them like they had been caught doing something they shouldn’t have been and that had Calum feeling a bit confused. He immediately felt like he was missing something; something felt different.

“Glad to see you two getting along” Luke smiled then he was looking to Michael as he raised his eyebrows. Calum sat down on the couch that him Ashton had been sitting on earlier and he caught Ashton’s eye the then the curly haired boy smiled at him. Calum returned it and really wished the boy was next to him again. Luke was about to sit down next to them but then Michael was speaking.

“Yeah we’re getting along real well” there was no sarcasm behind his voice but Calum did see him smirk and Calum looked up to see Luke squinting at the boy and Ashton looked a bit uncomfortable.

“What does that mean?” Luke laughed and then Michael was just patting his lap. Calum looked down to see a few empty beer bottles and it was obvious that Michael was a bit drunk. He had never seen him like this but he couldn’t deny that it was a bit cute how Michael was acting. Calum watched Luke cautiously step closer to him then Michael was pulling him down. Luke started giggling and let his head fall onto Michael’s shoulder as soon as the other boy started tickling him and Calum couldn’t help the smile that spread over his face. He looked over to see Ashton smiling at them as well “Michael” Luke whined and then Michael was stopping and just resting his hands on Luke’s thighs.

“I gotta tell you something” he said getting serious and Calum seen that Ashton had stopped smiling as well. Calum was a bit nervous as to what was going to be said next. Michael opened his mouth like he was going to say something but then he was smiling a bit and looking over at Ashton “You tell him”

“What? No” Ashton said sternly.

“You initiated it” Michael said back in the same stubborn tone but Ashton was shaking his head and Michael let out an irritated breath.

“I told Ashton…about the thing we talked about” it was so vague so Calum still had no clue what was going on but he seen Luke widen his eyes so he obviously did know what Michael meant. The shock was gone off his face in an instant though as he smiled wide at Ashton then looked back to Michael, practically jumping up and down with how excited he looked.

“You did?! You told him?” Luke was giggling happily and Calum felt himself smiling.

“Yeah” Michael laughed then patted his thigh and started rubbing his hand up it. Calum looked away because of how badly he wished Michael was doing that to him

“And you agreed to it?” Luke said facing Ashton. All Ashton did was nod then he was blushing a bit as he looked to Michael “But…wait. What did he initiate?” Luke cocked an eyebrow at Michael and that had Michael blushing as well. Calum was getting more confused by the second.

“We ummm….” Michael started biting his lip and Calum made sure not to look away from him for even a second “We kissed” Michael said it just barely above a whisper but Calum knew he heard him right and he about fell off the couch. Ashton and Michael had kissed? Ashton had gotten to kiss Michael? It was something that Calum has been wanted for years and he was just filled with jealously. He was also jealous that Michael got to kiss Ashton. The jealously went both ways and it was making him feel all over the place. He wanted to kiss them both just as much and he just sat there pouting a bit. He didn’t know how long he just looked down at his lap but when he looked back up Ashton was staring at him with a concerned look and Luke was now standing up and off of Michael’s lap “Are you mad?” Michael seemed so scared of what Luke’s answer would be.

“Yeah I’m mad…cause you got to kiss him first” Luke crossed his arms over his chest and that had Ashton gluing his eyes to Luke and staring at him like he couldn’t believe what he had just said “This was my idea so I should have gotten to kiss him first” Luke was full on pouting now and Calum had to suppress a giggle. This whole situation was actually a bit funny.

“Well Jesus Christ” Michael rolled his eyes “He’s sitting right there if you want to kiss him so badly, Luke” and that had Ashton looking even more shocked as he looked from Luke to Michael a few times. Calum actually couldn’t believe this was happening.

“Well maybe I will” Luke said in a snotty tone and Michael just laughed and shook his head.

“Be my guest” was all that Michael said back. It was the first time Luke properly looked at Ashton and Ashton’s face was beat red. Calum sat there actually feeling bad for him but there was nothing he could do about anything that was going on.


	33. Ashton

Ashton could barely even breathe with what was going on. He had to admit that he was still a bit out of breath from the kiss he had from Michael in the kitchen and now Luke wanted to kiss him? Was this some crazy dream he was having? Luke still continued to stare Ashton down as he nervously bit at his lip.

“Do I need to show you how?” Michael said to Luke in a smartass tone and it had Ashton chuckling a bit and looking over to the blue haired boy. Michael winked at him and Ashton felt that turned on feeling coming back to him. Luke just glared at Michael then his face looked softer as he turned back to Ashton.

“Can I?” Luke said so innocently and Ashton felt like his heart was actually melting. He nodded, not being able to form words, and then Luke was looking nervous as he sat next to him on the couch and faced him. Even with Luke this close to his face Ashton felt himself shaking a bit. He’s wanted this for so long and it was finally about to happen. Ashton wasn’t going to let himself fuck it up just because of his nerves. He sat up a little straighter then gave Luke a small smile. It seemed to help because the boy was getting closer to him so that Ashton could feel the boys breathe on his face and Ashton didn’t tear his eyes away from the blue pair of eyes of front of him. They were so much more beautiful up close and Ashton realized that everything about Luke was more beautiful up close. Ashton got lost in his eyes so he wasn’t ready for it when Luke leaned forward and softly pressed his lips against Ashton’s, just barely even touching them. Ashton took a deep breath then kissed his back and took Luke’s bottom lip between his own and then Luke was kissing him back with a bit more force.

Of course it was even better than what Ashton had imagined it and he felt like his heart was about to beat out of his chest at any second. He couldn’t help but want to touch the boy more so he moved his one hand up to cup Luke’s cheek and Luke smiled into the kiss as he kissed Ashton faster. It felt like him and Luke were the only ones in the room and Ashton had forgotten that two other people were watching them; two other people that he had feelings for as well and it was such a crazy situation. This kiss was a lot less rough and eager than his and Michael’s but Ashton loved kissing like this as well. It was over a lot sooner than he wanted it to be as Luke backed up away from him a few inches and just smiled wide as Ashton could see him blushing. Ashton let his hand fall from the boys face and just let it rest on his thigh as he softly rubbed at the fabric.

“This is officially the weirdest fucking night ever” Michael said loudly and it had them all giggling. Ashton looked over to see how Calum was handling all of this and he was just smiling wide as he stared at Michael “And poor Calum over there has absolutely no idea what is going on” and Ashton watched Calum perk up when Michael mentioned his name.

“I’ll explain it to him” Ashton said and then Calum was looking at him and nodding like he was just dying to know what was going on “We umm…we should get going” Ashton rubbed the back of his neck and started getting nervous again when he felt Luke’s eyes on him. It wasn’t like Ashton wanted to leave Michael or Luke it was just that all this had been very overwhelming and he needed to catch his breath a bit. He was sure that Luke and Michael understood that. He stood up and seen Luke backing up a bit so that he could lean his back against Michael and Michael immediately put an arm around his waist and Luke leaned into him even more. Ashton shook himself out of it a bit then he was looking over at Calum who was already standing up “See you guys around then” Ashton said with a bit of a smirk.

“Yeah you’re stuck with us now” Michael said as he yawned and Ashton smiled at that. He really couldn’t think of any other people he would rather be stuck with.

*

It wasn’t like Calum was a big talker but he seemed to be really lost in thought as Ashton drove back to Calum’s house. A lot had happened and he just expected that Calum was trying to process it all; Ashton was trying to piece everything together as well. He had kissed Michael and it was amazing; he’s never wanted someone so badly in his whole life and never felt someone be so eager with him like Michael was, it was such a great feeling. Then he had kissed Luke, the boy he had been in love with for years, and it exceeded all of his expectations. Luke was so gentle and caring when he kissed and it had Ashton melting into it just wanting to hold the boy forever. Michael and Luke had kissed him two very different ways but they both were the best kisses he’s ever had. Another thing popped into his head at that moment though. He had kissed Michael and Ashton knows how much Michael means to Calum. It couldn’t have been easy on the boy having to hear that. Ashton looked over to the boy who was leaning his head against the window now as he quietly hummed to himself.

“Cal?” Ashton’s voice cracked and the boy moved his eyes to look at Ashton but seemed too tired to move his head “Are you…are you mad at me?” it was killing Ashton and he had to know. The last thing he ever wanted to do was hurt the boy. That had Calum sitting up and fixing his eyes straight on Ashton’s face as he shook his head.

“I’m not mad at you” Calum was still shaking his head, looking so confused “Why would you think that?”

“Cause…” Ashton closed his eyes for a second then looked back to the road as he remembered how much he enjoyed kissing Michael “Cause I kissed Michael….and you like him. I shouldn’t have done that, Cal. I’m sorry”

“I mean I’m not mad...I couldn’t ever be mad at you” Calum was speaking in a sad tone as he looked down at his lap and Ashton wanted so badly to reach out to him; so for once he did. He reached a hand out to softly brush his fingers through the boys hair and Calum looked up at him with a bit of a surprised look but Ashton didn’t stop. Ashton only let his hand fall from the boys hair when he spoke again, even though he didn’t want to stop “I just wished I could have kissed him too” Calum whispered it like he was ashamed of himself and Ashton didn’t want him feeling like that. Ashton was about to speak but then Calum was saying more “And I wish I could kiss you and Luke too” Ashton felt his heartbeat picking up at that. He wanted to lean forward so badly and let Calum know how much he watned to kiss him too. Calum was then looking up at Ashton and Ashton could see his eyes glazed over. Seeing Calum so hurt killed Ashton so much and he felt his own eyes burning “Ashton what’s wrong with me? Why are my feelings all over the place? Like why can’t I just like one person? That’s how it’s supposed to be isn’t it?” Luckily they were pulling to the side of the road in front of Calum’s house so Ashton could fully focus on the hurt boy in front of him.

“Hey” Ashton spoke softly as he ran his hand down the back of Calum’s hair then stopped at his neck as he slowly rubbed his thumb against the skin there. Calum closed his eyes at the touch “There’s nothing wrong with you. We’re actually all going through the same thing you are…all four of us are. We seem to all…” Ashton chuckled a bit at how funny the whole situation was “We seem to all like each other and that’s actually what Luke and Michael wanted me to talk to you about” Calum sniffled a bit then looked straight at Ashton.

“Yeah what?”

“Well…Luke had this idea that we all just be together; like all four of us. But you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do, Calum. It’s kind of a big thing” Calum bit at his lip as he went back to looking down at his lap and Ashton was so nervous of his answer. He wanted to be with Calum just as much as he wanted to be with the others. Calum meant so much to him.

“I’ll do it” Calum nodded and Ashton actually seen him smiling.

“Yeah? No one is going to force you into doing anything you don’t wanna do though okay?”

“I trust you guys” Calum smiled again and Ashton almost started crying. All he did was rub another hand through Calum’s hair then let his hand fall. He didn’t want to stop touching him but he didn’t want to make the boy uncomfortable. Calum was then looking at his house for the first time since they pulled up next to it and Ashton heard him gasp a bit. He was frozen as he stared at the black truck in the driveway and Ashton doesn’t remember seeing it there when they left.

“Calum” Ashton spoke quietly. Ashton looked down to see Calum start to scratch so hard at the polish on his nails that it was starting to chip off.

“My dads’ here” he spoke just barely above a whisper “He’s gonna…he’s gonna kill me if he sees me wearing this” Calum started to scrub harder at his nails to where it looked painful and Ashton took his hand away and took it between both of his hands.

“Do you not want to go in there?”

“No…No I don’t’ wanna go in there” Calum spoke quickly and Ashton could see the tears falling onto his cheeks.

“It’s okay” Ashton soothed him “You don’t have to. You can come back to my house…I mean if you want” Calum was already nodding before Ashton was finished and Ashton knew he wouldn’t be able to leave Calum feeling this scared. He had no clue what Calum’s dad was like but he knew he already hated him. He hated anyone that made Calum this terrified. Ashton rubbed his thumb against Calum’s hand a few more times then he was letting it go and starting the car. Ashton just felt like it was his job to keep Calum safe and he knew he would no matter what.


	34. Calum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Longish Calum chapter woo! Let me know what you think :)

As soon as Calum stepped in Ashton’s house he felt safer. Luckily his dad wasn’t home much but when he was Calum wanted to be as far away as possible from the man. It wasn’t like his father had ever layed a hand on him but it was more verbal abuse; telling Calum how “only fags wear make up and paint their nails” and just telling Calum over and over how worthless he was. His father had said it so often that sometimes he began to believe it.  
Ashton helped Calum take his coat off, which had Calum already feeling better, and then he was following Ashton into the kitchen.

“I don’t know about you but I’m starving” Ashton groaned like he was actually close to dying of starvation and Calum quietly giggled. He also had to admit that he was pretty hungry himself. Calum looked around the large kitchen that looked like ones he’s seen on cooking shows. There was a small table that was sort of built into the large window and it had a booth type of seating that went almost all the way around it. All the curtains in the kitchen were light blue and one of them was slightly moving from the heater kicking on. It was so quiet and peaceful. Calum took a seat at the counter and watched the curly haired boy search through a couple of cupboards as he whistled to himself “Do you like grilled cheese?” and Calum nodded quickly. It was actually one of his favorites.

He just continued to look around the kitchen or look at Ashton’s back as he prepared the food as he would occasionally tap his fingers on the counter. He didn’t even mind that they weren’t talking; he just loved being in Ashton’s presence. Something kept popping into his head that he couldn’t seem to push away; it was the way he remembers Ashton softly kissing Luke. He remembers the way Ashton seemed to take a deep breath and then he was placing a hand on Luke’s cheek as he kissed him more eagerly. Calum couldn’t stop thinking about how badly he wanted that and he could have it if Ashton knew he was ready to take it to the next step. Calum knew he was but he also didn’t know how to initiate it. He was never good at flirting or letting people know that he wanted something. He figured it would just have to happen in its own time but Calum hoped he didn’t have to wait long.

He has a feeling that he’s wanted to kiss Ashton every since he met him for the first time. Ashton had been so soft and caring with him as he sat on the ground crying. Back then Calum never would have imagined that that moment would change his life. He never thought that anything good would come out of it because honestly he thought Ashton talking to him would be a onetime thing. Calum just thought that Ashton did what any normal person would do but Ashton wasn’t normal at all; he was the sweetest person that Calum had ever met and he still had no clue how he got this lucky. Ashton saved him and he doesn’t think he can ever thank him enough for that.

Calum was knocked out of his thoughts when Ashton was putting the plate with the grilled cheese in front of him with a big smile on his face. It looked delicious and now Calum was feeling more hungry than before.

“Thank you” Calum said softly but he was thanking Ashton for more than the food; he was thanking him for everything that he has done for him. He hoped Ashton got that message.

“You’re welcome” Ashton said back in a cheery tone “Wanna go watch TV?” Calum nodded and then Ashton was leading him out into the living room. Ashton threw a few blankets onto another couch before sitting in the one right across from the TV. Calum sat right next to him, even though he wanted to be closer, then they both ate their first half of grilled cheese in silence “Shit” Ashton sat up and immediately turned the volume up “They’re playing the Florida State game re-cap’s” Calum looked over to see a couple football players being interviewed and Ashton looked so into it. Calum thought it was adorable how he was sitting on the edge of the couch with his eyes glued to the TV.

“Is that where you wanna go to college?” Calum had to ask. It was so far away and he knew he was being selfish but he doesn’t know what he would do if Ashton left him.

“Yeah” Ashton nodded, still looking at the TV “Been wanting to go there ever since I was a kid” Ashton chuckled a few seconds after that and Calum got excited, knowing that Ashton was about to tell him a story. Ashton was then setting his empty plate on the coffee table then turned on the couch so that his back was against the end of it and he was fully facing Calum with his knees to his chest. All Calum wanted to do was curl against him “I remember when I was like five years old my dad got me this Florida State shirt and then matching shorts to go along with it and I swear I like never took either of them off. My mom had to force me to take them off when they got dirty just so she could wash them. It was a bit of a problem actually” Ashton laughed again and Calum couldn’t help but smile. Ashton’s smile faded quite a bit and then it was gone completely as he looked down to his lap. Calum’s heart ached at seeing Ashton like this because it was the first time he really had “My dad played football there and he always wanted me to do the same. I feel like he would be really proud of me if I did get in…but who knows if I even will. I’ll know in a few months” Calum all of a sudden pushed his selfish thoughts away and just prayed to god that Ashton would get in. Ashton seemed to want it so badly and it seemed to be a thing that he had wanted for a very long time. Calum also started wonder what happened to Ashton’s dad. He could tell it was a touchy subject for him though so he didn’t ask.

“Well they’d be crazy not to let you in”

“Yeah” Ashton let out a half laugh as he looked down at his lap. When Ashton looked up Calum could swear he seen his cheeks a bit pink “We’ll see” Ashton took a deep breath and it seemed like he was going to move onto something different “So what about you? What’re you doing after high school?”

“Oh umm” Calum bit at his nails a bit “I got into this art school in the city” and Calum seen Ashton’s eyes begin to widen.

“Holy shit you got into an art school? Which one?” and Calum loved how excited he sounded. He had never really gotten to tell anyone about this.

“Cornish” Calum said as he messed with his fingers.

“That’s fucking great, Cal. I heard that’s a really hard school to get in to” and Calum just shrugged as he fought a smile “It is!” Ashton laughed and he playfully ruffled Calum’s hair “So are you excited?”

“I mean yeah…” he was excited but there was something that he always felt himself getting worried about “But do you think it will be like high school?” Calum just didn’t want to be picked on at the art school. He had dealt with that enough in high school and he didn’t know if he could take it any longer.

“No way” Ashton said quickly “Plus you’ll have this common thing with everyone else there. You’ll make friends in no time” and that was exactly what Calum needed to hear. He still didn’t understand how Ashton always knew what the right thing to say was.

“I hope so” Calum smiled up at him and Ashton returned it. He knew for sure he wouldn’t make any friends as good as Ashton though. You didn’t run into people like Ashton very often and Calum just hoped when high school did let out that he could still be friends with him. He doesn’t know what would happen to him if Ashton did disappear out of his life and he didn’t even want to think about it.

“I know you will, Cal” Ashton said looking at the TV again and he looked so cuddly and cute as he yawned and leaned his head against the back of the couch. Calum had to force himself to look away or else he knew he would end up curling up next to him.

*

Calum woke up by feeling like someone forced him into a sitting position and his heart was racing as he curled up in a ball and rested his face on his knees. Almost every night he would have a dream about something chasing him; the things that chased him were never human that was for sure and they were terrifying. Calum thought that just for one night he could be free of those dreams but he was wrong. He lifted his head up and then started to remember where he was; he was at Ashton’s house and he was still on the couch. He didn’t even remember falling asleep and he for sure didn’t remember lying down. There was also a blanket on him now and he remembered that this same blanket was on the couch next to his when they had come into the living room. Calum smiled to himself knowing that Ashton must have put it on him.

His breathing started to come back to normal but every sound that the house would make had him jumping sky high. The heater kicked on and Calum hid under the blanket remembering exactly what the thing looked like in his dream. It’s whole face was burnt crisp like he had been in a fire and Calum remembered it’s red eyes staring at him with so much evil that he actually started to shake just thinking about it. Calum desperately wished that Ashton was next to him right now and he looked over to see the stairs. He got up, not even knowing where he was going, but he just knew he didn’t want to be alone anymore. All the other nights he had nightmares he just had to lay there wide awake by himself until he felt tired enough to go back to sleep but Ashton was upstairs and Calum just had to be near him.

Luckily the stairs didn’t creak when he walked up them and he made it up there without making hardly any noise. He looked to the left and seen that there was only one door down that hallway. From this distance he could see a small light plugged into the wall and he looked down to see tile flooring. He looked the other way and began walking. The first door he walked by had a large empty bed that Calum expected to be Ashton’s parents room so he kept walking down the carpeted hallway. The next room was colored a light blue room and had toys scattered all over the floor. He looked across the room to see a pink room and then there was only one other room on the same side as the blue room.

Calum took a deep breath and tried to tell himself that Ashton wouldn’t be mad at him for being woken up. He took a few quick steps then he was standing in Ashton’s doorway. The room was colored grey with a big Florida State fabric poster hung above his bed and there were other sports and music posters scattered around the walls. Calum finally looked down to see the sleeping boy. Ashton was shirtless with the dark blue blanket only covering his waist down as he laid on his stomach. Calum was even more nervous than before because Ashton looked so cute and peaceful and he felt bad for having to wake him up. Maybe he could just get into his bed without waking him up but that would be pretty weird when Ashton woke up the next morning and there was someone else in his bed. Calum finally walked into the room and he could now hear the boys’ soft breathing as his face was pressed into the pillow facing away.

“Ashton?” Calum whispered as he was now standing on the empty side of the bed but Ashton didn’t even move an inch. Calum just expected that he was a heavy sleep so he tried again “Ash?” he said a bit louder. He had never called him that but it just sounded right coming off his tongue. This time Ashton stretched a bit and Calum tried not to get too caught up in the way his back muscles popped out. He heard Ashton whimper a bit and Calum smiled; it was the cutest thing he’s ever heard. Ashton was then turning around and facing him as he rubbed at his eyes.

“You okay?” his voice was rough and Calum was so fond for sleepy Ashton.

“Umm…can I sleep here?” he nodded towards the bed and Ashton was instantly nodding and pulling back the covers. Calum tried not to notice that Ashton was in only his boxers and he slid into the left side of the bed. Somehow it was so warm and Calum wondered if Ashton had been sleeping on this side of the bed earlier in the night. He snuggled up under the blankets and faced Ashton as the curly haired boy helped pull the covers over him more. Calum felt 100 times better now that he was tucked in next to Ashton and he let out a content sigh as the boy rubbed at his arms that were under the blankets to warm him up. Calum missed his touch the second Ashton let his hand fall and then he was putting his own arms under the blankets as he stayed facing Calum.

Calum was feeling so relaxed so he was starting to get tired but he just didn’t want to tear his eyes away from Ashton. Ashton eye’s seemed to be getting heavy as he would start to close them but then he would be opening them again a few seconds later. Calum felt his heart speeding up when he seen Ashton’s arm moving a bit and then he could feel Ashton’s fingers touching his own like he was just needing to touch Calum in some way but didn’t want to take it too far. Calum moved his hand so that he was holding onto Ashton’s and then Ashton smiled before holding it back.

Calum started to feel even more tired as Ashton started to rub his thumb softly against his hand as his eyes were now closed but it wasn’t enough for Calum; he wanted more. He doesn’t know where he got the courage but he slowly took his hand away from Ashton’s and he seen the way Ashton opened his eyes and looked hurt for a few seconds but then Calum was getting closer to the boy and wrapping one arm around his bare waist as he curled his other arm against himself. Only a second went by where Ashton must have been shocked at what Calum was doing but then he was instantly wrapping his arm around Calum as he held him tight. Calum almost cried at how safe and comforted he felt when Ashton moved down the bed a little so that he could nuzzle his face into Calum’s neck. He let out a content sigh then started to slowly rub his fingers up and down Calum’s back and Calum swore he could do this every night for the rest of his life; just laying here with Ashton’s arms around him.

Suddenly Calum felt Ashton’s soft lips touch the skin on his neck and a chill ran through his body. Calum rubbed a hand up Ashton’s side to make sure he knew that he didn’t want him to stop. Ashton got the message because he started to peck the lightest kisses all over Calum’s neck then he put a few on the side of head. Ashton’s hand moved from his back to slowly move under the front of Calum’s shirt as he started to slowly trail his fingers up and down the boys’ side and Calum felt like all the air had been taken from him when he felt Ashton’s gentle hands on his bare skin. Ashton was touching him so lightly that if he moved his hand even slightly then he wouldn’t be touching him at all and Calum never felt anyone be like this with him; it was exactly what he needed though. He needed someone to be caring and loving like this and Calum was actually convinced that Ashton was perfect.

His fingers ran up Calum’s sides a few more times before they were coming to a stop and then his hand was coming up to cup Calum’s cheek. Calum scooted back a bit away from the boys’ chest so he could face him and Ashton looked so much more awake than before but his messy hair reminded Calum that he had just been sleeping a few minutes ago. Ashton was giving Calum a look that he hadn’t ever seen before as he rubbed his thumb against Calum’s cheek. Calum couldn’t help but turn his head and kiss his hand and then rub his face against it a few times. Ashton closed his eyes almost like he was close to tears then a soft smile was overtaking his face.

“Can….” Ashton swallowed hard as he rubbed the back of his hand on Calum’s cheek “Can I kiss you?” Calum opened his mouth planning on saying “yes” but he couldn’t even find the strength to talk with Ashton’s gentle hand still on his cheek so he just nodded eagerly. Ashton closed his eyes for a few seconds and let out a breath like he was so relieved that Calum was going to let him do this. He went back to cupping Calum’s cheek then moved his other hand to card his fingers through the back of the boys’ hair. Calum closed his eyes like he had seen people do in the movies once Ashton was getting closer to him and then the next thing he registered was Ashton’s soft lips against his own. Calum literally felt like he was about to have a heart attack with how fast his heart was beating and he felt goosebumps forming all over his body as Ashton kept rubbing his fingers in his hair and softly taking Calum’s top lip in between his own. Ashton took his lips away and Calum’s eyes shot open “Okay?” Ashton said in a concerned voice and Calum just smiled as he nodded again. He didn’t want Ashton to stop and luckily Ashton went back to kissing him.

This time Calum felt more brave and opened his mouth a bit wider to kiss Ashton harder and he felt Ashton’s nails dig into his scalp a bit as he kissed him back in the same way. Soon they were going at a steady rhythm and Calum now had one hand rubbing up and down Ashton’s back he felt the goosebumps on his skin. Ashton was heavily breathing into his mouth every time he kissed the boy and Calum swore he was going to pass out with how good this all felt. Ashton started to slowly kiss him again and then he was pulling back as they were both out of breath and he leaned his forehead against Calum’s as he closed his eyes. Calum moved his hand to start rubbing up Ashton’s toned stomach and he felt Ashton visibly shiver which scared Calum so he stilled his hand. Ashton opened his eyes and seen the worry on Calum’s face so he shook his head.

“No…it feels really good” Ashton said softly like he was begging the boy to keep touching him and Calum smiled as he started to rub his hand up and down Ashton’s stomach again. He saw that Ashton started to close his eyes as soon as started doing it again. Calum knew that everyone had a favorite place that they liked to be touched and he figured out right then and there that Ashton’s favorite place to be touched was his stomach. Ashton opened his eyes a bit just so he could lean forward and give Calum a few more pecks on his lips and cheeks and Calum could tell how tired he was getting just from him gently touching his stomach. Ashton leaned down on the pillow as he was still facing Calum so Calum did the same but still continued to rub his hand up the boys’s stomach.

He started to trail upwards more so that his hand was at Ashton’s chest and then when he went back down he lightly brushed his nipple and Calum seen Ashton do that shiver thing that he had done before as he let his eyes close again. Calum never let his hand stop moving as he leaned forward and started putting open mouth kisses on Ashton’s neck. Ashton made the quietest whimper sound as Calum moved up to start nipping at his jaw and Calum realized this was a thing he really loved; he loved making Ashton feel good and comforted. He backed up so that he could look at Ashton as he brushed his fingers up the middle of his stomach and couldn’t help but lean forward and press a few kisses to his chest. Ashton let out a stuttered breath at that and then he was rubbing a hand through Calum’s hair. Calum cuddled into him again as Ashton wrapped an arm around him but he made sure to keep rubbing his fingers down the boys stomach.

Soon Ashton’s breathing was getting heavier and Calum knew he was asleep. He kissed him once more on the chest and then the lips before finally letting himself fall asleep as well, stilling his hand on the boys’ stomach. He didn’t want this night to end but he just couldn’t keep his eyes open any longer.


	35. Luke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright so I didn't plan on already updating but I'll be adding a bunch of chapters today because my mom is making me go back to her house and if you are familar with my fics you'll know that I hate going back to my moms and it's always very stressful for me. I won't be back to the internet world until at least after the 31st because that is my brother Jake's birthday. The good thing about being back there is I always have a bunch of time to write more chapters and honestly since I'll be there so long I will probably have this fic almost finished or completely finished by the time I get back. Anyways let me know what you think and leave me nice messages for when I get back! haha (God knows I'll need it) love you guys and wish me luck lmao (I fucking hate it over there)

“It such an ugly color of yellow” Luke gazed down at the slip of paper between his fingers as he placed a hand over his face “Michael” he looked up at the boy and started to give him puppy dog eyes.

“I can’t tell if you’re being serious or not, Luke”

“Michael…I’m too cute for detention”

“I agree” Michael smirked and put both hands on the lockers behind Luke as he pecked him on the lips twice.

“Do you know what they do to guys like me in detention? It rhymes with grape, Michael” he said acting like he was about to cry again and Michael just shook his head as he laughed.

“Well I’ll be in there with you” Michael decided to go along with it “I won’t let anything happen to you” and when he said that Luke could actually tell that he was being serious. He knew that Michael would always watch out for him.

“You promise?” Luke pouted and Michael gave him a kiss on the lips again except he got more into it this time as he kissed the boy slowly causing Luke to melt into it and wrap his arms around Michael’s waist.

“I promise, baby” Michael whispered as he still had his lips touching Luke’s and Luke loved the nickname “For real though it won’t be a big deal, Luke” Michael said backing up a bit and Luke was glad he said that. Even though all of that was just an act to get Michael to baby him, because Luke loved it, he was still actually worried about what went down in detention. When him and Michael had skipped class to go get each other off in the bathroom Luke hadn’t even thought about the consequences because he was so focused on getting his hands on the beautiful boy in front of him.

“Okay” Luke nodded and put his head down then he felt Michael’s fingers lifting his chin up to meet his eyes again. Michael leaned forward and gave his cheek a kiss before rubbing a hand through his hair.

“Just meet me here at your locker after your next class then we can walk there together cause I know you’re way too innocent to know where the detention room is” Michael laughed and Luke just smiled; he was right, Luke had no clue where it was “What class do you have next?”

“History” Luke rolled his eyes; he hated History class.

“Yeah? Wanna skip it?” and Luke playfully hit his shoulder which caused Michael to start laughing as he still kept Luke caged in between his arms.

“I want to….” Luke admitted “But I better not”

“I know” Michael said understanding of it “I’ll walk you” He said grabbing Luke’s hand and Luke loved holding on to Michael’s hand so much. They started walking down the hallway as the warning bell rang and thankfully Luke’s class was only in the next hallway “Have you seen Ash or Calum yet today?”

“No I haven’t” Luke said sadly but it was a big school and it wasn’t normal that he seen them more than in Chemistry class. Luke looked up right then and seen Ashton turning the corner with the kid that was in the picture he took of him at the game. Luke started to think about how much had changed since then. Ashton and the guy next to him were having a conversation as the other boy laughed at something Ashton said and Luke was a bit jealous. As Ashton got closer he caught Luke’s eye and instantly smiled as he nodded at him. Luke watched Ashton look over to Michael and do the same thing except it was more of a smirk than a smile and Luke had to hold back a laugh. Luke looked over to see Michael blushing a bit; Michael was actually blushing and Luke couldn’t believe it. Suddenly Michael started to get a cocky look on his face and he looked away as Ashton passed. Luke heard a smacking sound as he seen Michael’s free arm do some sort of movement then Luke was looking confused as he focused on Ashton. Ashton was laughing as he had a hand on his ass and cranking his neck back to look at Michael.

“You dick” Ashton laughed out and Michael did a cheeky smile as he quickly glanced at the boy and flipped him off over his shoulder. Ashton was then shaking his head while he still smiled then he was walking into one of the classrooms.

“Did you just smack his ass?” Luke asked Michael.

“He liked it” Michael shrugged as he was still smirking.

Sometimes the way Ashton and Michael acted confused him. They acted as if they had been friend for years but just a couple of days ago Michael was constantly giving him dirty looks. They seemed to be on a whole other wavelength than what Luke and Ashton were on but Luke decided not to question it; he was just happy that they were getting along so well. They were now getting to Luke’s classroom so he was forced to let go of Michael’s hand.

“I’ll see your little trouble making ass in detention” Michael smiled before pecking a kiss to Luke’s lips and Luke wanted it to last a lot longer than it did but he knew Michael had to get to class.

“See ya” Luke laughed as he couldn’t help but put one more kiss to Michael’s lips.

“Bye baby” Michael said over his shoulder as he started to walk towards class. Luke just stood there outside his class not being able to look away from Michael as he walked down the hallway. He giggled to himself when Michael turned to smile wide at him right before turning the corner. Luke felt so lucky to have him.


	36. Michael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long Michael chapter. I fucking love this chapter

Michael was turning into the gym right as the bell was ringing and he jogged to the locker room but then someone was stopping him.

“I guess we aren’t supposed to get changed yet” the kid said then he was nodding off to something behind Michael and there was their principle standing there

“Just get your gym clothes then come back out here”

“Umm alright” Michael said really confused but he walked into the locker room and did as he was told. He walked back out with his black shorts and black and gold shirt in his hands then started to look around at the other kids.

“You were late Mr. Clifford” came a booming voice and Michael cursed to himself. He was sure he had managed to slip in the doors without being caught.

“I wasn’t late” He said back and he looked back to see the principle standing there “I came in right as the bell was ringing” he continued and the principle just shook his head at him. Michael sat against the wall with a few of the other students “What the hell is going on?” Michael said to the kid next to him.

“Guess Miller is out today” and Michael groaned. He hated their principle even more than their gym teacher.

“Take a seat” their principle shouted and kids rushed to sit against the wall “Mr. Miller was unable to come in today and since we were notified at the last second we were unable to find a sub to fill in for him” Michael groaned because he knew that the next hour would consist of them doing suicides because their principle loved torturing them. Michael had been to his office enough times to know that “So since I have things to take care of…” Michael picked his head up and began to smile “You will be joining the other 3rd hour gym class in the B wing” and Michael was so relieved to hear that. He didn’t know how the other gym teacher was but he knew it was better than their principle.

*

When the principle was leading them towards the gym at the other end of the school Michael realized that he hadn’t even been in this other gym or in this part of the school. The lockers were gold down here instead of black like his and Luke’s were. It almost seemed like a completely different school and Michael could see other kids looking around as well. They entered the gym and Michael did recognize a few kids but he didn’t get time to look at them all as they all were doing different things in the gym. Most of them were shooting hoops though.

“Behave yourselves” the principle said to them and Michael didn’t miss how the man’s eyes lingered on him before he left like he was telling Michael specifically to behave. Michael rolled his eyes away then started walking further into the gym like everyone else was.  
After he got quickly changed in the unfamiliar locker room he joined the rest of the kids out in the open area. Michael spotted a familiar face sitting on the bleachers so decided to sit next to him.

“What’s up, Clifford?” the guy smiled at him and they slapped hands.

“Not shit. Is it required to participate in this class?” and Jared laughed at that.

“Nah. There’s a bunch of kids who sit out” Michael just nodded then the gym teacher stood in front of them all.

“Since the weather is more warm than usual we will be going outside to play some flag football because there are far too many of you to be all jammed in here” and Michael cringed. There was no way in hell he was participating now. Michael started to glance around the room again and that was when his eyes fell on an even more familiar face and he instantly smiled. Ashton was leaning against the wall with the same kid he was with in the hallway and Michael felt his stomach flutter a bit when Ashton nodded, with a slight smile, and winked at him before looking back the teacher that was still speaking. Michael still couldn’t tear his eyes away though. His eyes roamed down Ashton’s body and seen the way his shirt sleeves fit snuggly against his bicep. Even from this distance Michael could see the muscles on his calves and he swallowed hard thinking about how sexy the muscles on his stomach probably were. He started thinking about putting his tongue and lips all over his stomach and Michael had to force himself to think about other things before he got hard in his shorts. The kids started to head towards the back door of the gym and Michael waited on the bleachers for Ashton to get closer. Thankfully Ashton started to slow down and let his friend go ahead of him then he was stopping front of Michael.

“Hey” Ashton said in a deep voice and Michael just stood up and acted like it didn’t turn him on more than like anything he’s ever heard.

“Hi” Michael smiled cheekily and they started walking towards the door. Ashton seemed unusually quiet and it had Michael looking over at him, wondering if something was wrong.

“Are you and Jared friends?” Ashton finally said, still looking down at the ground as they made it towards the football field.

“Not really” Michael shrugged, not knowing where he was going with this “I’ve partied with him a few times but that’s it”

“Listen, I’m not gonna tell you who you can and can’t be friends with but Jared is a piece of shit” Ashton said bluntly and Michael took a double look at him.

“Isnt he like…on the football team with you?” Michael kind of just assumed that Ashton got along with everyone that was on the team with him.

“Yeah but he’s an asshole” Ashton was using that same angry tone as before and Michael really wanted to know what Jared had done to Ashton to make him hate him so much.

“Ashton…” Michael said in a soft voice and it had Ashton looking up at him “What’d he do to piss you off so much?” Ashton was then taking a deep breath and looking forward. The wind was slightly blowing and it was making Michael feel like he just wanted to curl up against the boy next to him. Plus Ashton just looked so hurt and Michael hated seeing him like this.

“Do you remember when we all met at the pizza place and Calum had a black eye and was all bruised up?”

“Y-yeah” Michael hated where this was going.

“Yeah well Jared was the one who did that to him” and Michael put a hand over his face. He now knew why Ashton had so much hatred for Jared; he did now too. Michael glared at the back of Jared as he was walking a few feet in front of them.

“Fucking asshole” Michael grinded his teeth “I swear I’ll kick his ass if I ever get the chance” Ashton just nodded in agreement as they got closer to the field. They were coming up to the bleachers and then Michael was walking towards them instead of the field like Ashton was. Ashton took a double look at him then laughed.

“Aren’t you coming?”

“Nah” Michael leaned his arm on top of the fence that surrounded the bleachers and smirked “I think I’ll just watch” when he said watch he meant that he was going to be watching Ashton and Ashton only. He knew Ashton was good at this sport and he had a feeling he would actually enjoy watching him playing it. When he had been watching the game with Luke he had barely even known Ashton so he doesn’t think he looked at him even once. Now things were a lot different and Ashton would be the only thing Michael was focusing on.

“Suit yourself” Ashton shrugged then he was shooting a smile in Michael’s direction before walking onto the field. Michael didn’t turn to start walking up the bleachers until Ashton was on the field then he sat on the 2nd row up and rested his feet on the metal bleachers in front of him as he leaned back on his elbows. He saw a few kids a couple rows away from him sitting out as well. The group of kids out on the field began to be separated into two teams and Michael seen that Ashton and his friend from earlier were both put on the same team then they slapped hands before backing up from the group a bit. Michael watched carefully as Ashton whispered something in the boys’ ear then they were both looking across the field at someone; from this view Michael couldn’t tell who exactly they were looking at though. He figured they were just making up their own plays to go by since there really was only three guys out there who even played football and they figured they would have a pretty good chance of their team winning.

The coach was then blowing the whistle and Michael noticed that Ashton’s smile was quickly wiped away and he seemed to put on his game face as he watched another kid get handed the ball and Ashton stood directly behind him as he put his hands downward, getting ready to be handed the ball when the play started. The boy in front of Ashton yelled a few words and Michael could see how seriously they were taking this and he smiled a bit. Then the ball was being handed to Ashton and Ashton was zipping off to the right of the field and Michael’s eyes widened; he doesn’t think he’s ever seen anyone run that fast in his entire life. He made it a couple of feet and then he seen that Asthon spotted a guy from the other team coming towards him so he threw the ball with great force, before the kid even had a shot, and then it was landing in his friends hands all the way across the field. Ashton’s friend was then just jogging towards the touchdown line because he was so far ahead of everyone else that he didn’t even need to run. Michael shook his head in astonishment at how far Ashton threw that ball and he looked back to see Ashton smiling wide as a few kids slapped him on the back but he kept his eyes on his friend across the field as he came closer to them. They slapped hands and then Ashton ruffled his hair before the next play started.

Michael never enjoyed watching Football before but he really loved watching the way Ashton played. Even though it was only gym class Ashton just put so much passion into the way that he played and it had Michael fondly smiling at him as he ran with the ball or caught it perfectly every time it was thrown to him. Michael hadn’t seen him mess up even once so far and he was honestly so impressed. It was the 4th play and the teacher was talking to one of the kids from the other team. Michael could see that Ashton was still out of breath from the last play as he leaned his head back and closed his eyes, trying to catch his breath. His friend was standing beside him now but Ashton was entirely facing in Michael’s direction. Ashton pulled at the bottom of his shirt and brought it up to wipe away the sweat on his face and Michael’s eyes widened. He already felt like his jeans were getting tighter around his dick as he looked down at Ashton’s stomach.

“Fuck” Michael just about moaned out and he didn’t even realize he had said that out loud until a kid from a couple rows away was looking at him. Michael still didn’t tear his eyes away from Ashton though as the boy let go of his shirt then he was putting a hand through his hair and pushing it all back off his face. He now had both hands resting on his head as he laughed at something his friend said and Michael watched the way his biceps would flex every few seconds as he moved arms a bit.

“This isn’t even a fair game” some kid on the left of Michael began to complain “I mean the red team has both Connor and Ashton. The blue team doesn’t even stand a fucking chance”

“Yeah that’s bullshit” some other kid agreed with him “And even if the red team only had Ashton the blue team still would fucking lose…I mean the kids a natural born athlete. It’s not even fair” and Michael chuckled a bit at that. He just watched as Ashton continued to smile before the next play was starting.  
By the end of class Michael started to regret watching Ashton the whole time cause he knew he had a total hard on and thanked god above that his shirt was long enough to cover it up. That would be an awkward conversation to have with Ashton like “hey the way you play is really fucking hot and I kind of want you to fuck me until I can’t even walk the next day” Michael’s pretty sure he would die of embarrassment if he ever had to voice his thoughts to Ashton like that. Not to mention that he really didn’t even know the boy that well and Ashton would probably think he was insane for having thoughts like that.

Michael stayed sitting as the kids on the field started to take drinks of the water bottles set out then some of them started making their way towards the exit of the field. Michael laughed to himself as Connor, Michael discovered his name was, poured all of his water bottle over Ashton’s head then Ashton just smiled and shook his head as he pushed all his wet hair back on his head. Even when Ashton did the most simple things it had Michael feeling turned on like he loved the way Ashton put a hand through his hair. He didn’t know what was going on with him but he needed to get it together. He couldn’t be this crazy over Ashton all just because of one kiss could he? Michael started to think that he could be. Ashton was now exiting the field and smiling wide up at him. Michael got that fluttering feeling his stomach again and rushed down there to be next to him. He knew he was so whipped for this curly haired boy.

*

When Michael got into the locker room after walking with Ashton the whole way there he glanced over as Ashton was walking over to the shower area with a towel over his shoulder and Michael swallowed hard, trying his hardest to not picture how amazing Ashton probably looked in the shower. Michael didn’t even need to take a shower since all he did the whole time was get hard over how hot Ashton looked out there on the field. He was still upset with himself for getting so into watching the boy out there. He shouldn’t have let it get that far to the point where he was literally drooling whenever Ashton did even the slightest bit of movement. He realized that he had just been standing there with his normal clothes in his hands for like the past three minutes.

He started to strip out of his gym clothes and then started to look around to see that there was only two other people in the locker room…well two other people and then Ashton was still, for some reason, in the shower; at least Michael was pretty sure he was still in there. He feels like Ashton would have at least said bye to him if he would have left but maybe Michael was zoning out so bad that he didn’t hear him. He let out an annoyed breath and then shimmied into his tight black jeans as the last two people were leaving.

“Fuck” Michael whispered. So it was just him and Ashton in here; just the two of them while Michael was still painfully hard in his jeans. If he was the only person in here he would have gladly just walked into one of the showers and gotten himself off but now he had to deal with his boner for however long his body decided to torture him. He was still shirtless and he was about to grab his shirt but then he heard footsteps behind him and he froze.

“Hey” Ashton did a half laugh and Michael tensed his jaw up “You’re still here” Michael refused to turn around though. Ashton had walked into the shower with only a towel so he knew Ashton was currently standing behind him all wet wearing nothing but a towel around his waist. Michael felt his dick twitch just at the thought of it.

“Y-yeah but I was just leaving” Michael shot out and he hated himself for stuttering but he brushed it off and hurried and grabbed his white t-shirt. He was so close to putting it over his head but then he could feel Ashton stepping closer to him.

“Why don’t you wanna look at me?” Ashton said in a voice that made him seem way younger than he was and Michael felt like a dick. He let out a breath and closed his eyes for a few seconds before turning around and it was just as he expected. It felt like someone had punched him in the stomach as he let his eyes roam down Ashton’s naked torso and he could still see droplets of water on his tan skin. Michael licked his lips without thinking about it then he wanted to throw himself down a flight of stairs when he realized what he had just done. Ashton probably knew what was wrong with him now and he looked back up to see Ashton smirking just like he knew he would be. Michael started to fidget a bit under his stare and he put his hand over his crotch a bit now that he didn’t have a shirt to cover his obvious boner. He was so fucked “Just as I expected” Ashton still had the biggest smirk on his face and Michael was stuck somewhere between wanting to slap the smirk right off his face to wanting to kiss it off his face.

“I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about” Michael said looking away from him for a few seconds but he knew Ashton wasn’t buying it when he started to walk closer to him. Michael didn’t even care that he was checking out Ashton anymore because it was like Ashton was asking for it with how he was walking with this cocky stride. Ashton was now right in front of him and Michael shivered as he felt Ashton’s hands begin to undo his pants. Ashton brought them down with ease and then Michael was stepping out of them, in only his boxers now, as Ashton eyed his body up and down a few times. Ashton was then looking back up at Michael’s face and Michael kept flicking his eyes down to the boys’ lips, just praying that he would get the message. He missed kissing Ashton so much and he had only gone one day without it. Luckily Ashton was then crashing his lips into Michael’s and starting to slowly push Michael’s bare back up against the locker. Ashton kissed him even more fiercely than last night and it had Michael feeling like his legs were about to give out as Ashton rubbed both hands through the back of his hair and started tugging hard on it. Usually Michael was always used to being in control but he actually loved how dominant Ashton was with him. He swears he would let Ashton do whatever he wanted. One of Ashton’s hands began to trial down his stomach and just rub lightly at the skin just above his boxer lining and then his hand was on Michael’s dick in an instant. Michael was confused when Ashton chuckled then started putting open mouth kisses all over his neck.

“You’re awful hard, Michael” he started biting at the skin right below his ear and Michael whimpered as Ashton’s hand kept palming at his dick “I just started touching you…Why are you already so hard?” he said it in such a teasing voice like he just knew that Michael had a boner the entire time he was out the field and Michael groaned.

“You’re such a little shit” Michael said through clenched teeth as Ashton sped up his hand and started licking up his neck and then biting it.

“If you answer my question I’ll keep making you feel good” Ashton whispered near his ear and slowed his hand so that he was barely even touching the blue haired boy and it was driving Michael absolutely insane. Michael almost cried out at the loss of contact and just knew that he needed to get to his release soon or else he was going to lose it.

“The way you were playing out there” Michael forced himself to say and it came out sounding like he was close to tears “Fuck, you looked so hot out there…you always look so hot, it drives me fucking insane” and Michael hoped that was enough. Ashton took his face out of Michael’s neck and flicked his eyes in a fast motion all over Michael’s face before leaning forward again and bringing their lips together again. Now that Ashton was pressed right up against him Michael could feel his hard dick against his own and he grinded into him, causing the curly haired boy to moan into his mouth and scratch his nails down his back. Without warning Ashton was dropping to his knees and pulling down Michael’s boxers. He was then licking his hand, which had Michael feeling like he was already going to come, then Ashton was starting to pump a hand on him in a slow motion. Ashton looked up and seen Michael looking down at him as he bit his lip and Ashton was licking his lips before starting to suck on the tip of Michael’s dick, never breaking contact with the boy above him. Michael moaned loud and threw his head back into the lockers as he squinted his eyes shut.

“Fuck, Ash” Michael said in a whiny voice with how close he already was. Ashton started taking more of him and Michael wasn’t going to miss the way Ashton’s mouth looked when it was swallowing his dick down. He took his head off the lockers and watched as the boy bobbed his head up down in a fast motion and Michael reached out to start running his hand through the still damp hair on his head. Ashton had his eyes closed and Michael actually missed the boy looking up at him. Michael tugged his hair a little and then Ashton was looking up at him and stopping a bit “I fucking it love when you look up at me” Michael said in a rough voice, from moaning so much, but he just needed to let the boy know that he didn’t want him to slow down. He felt Ashton actually smile against his dick and that brought Michael so much closer. Ashton kept his eyes open and looking up at Michael as he sped up again and then his free hand started to rub Michael’s balls in a massaging manner “I’m gonna-“Michael cut himself off with a rough moan that was filling the empty locker room and then he was coming down Ashton’s throat as his thighs started to shake “Shit…fucking hell Ashton” Michael whimpered out when he was able to talk. Ashton was then pulling off of him and licking his lips as he started to stand up “Have you done that before? Fuck” Michael moaned again and Ashton chuckled a bit as he wiped some hair off of Michael’s forehead.

“No but I’ve always wanted to” he shyly smiled like he felt ashamed for admitting that and Michael just leaned forward and kissed him softly. He thinks that it’s the softest they’ve ever kissed but he loved it. Michael pulled up his boxers then remembered that Ashton was probably extremely hard under his towel and he started to undo it from his waist. Michael let it fall to the floor then his mouth was practically watering at the sight. Michael was just going to give Ashton a quick hand job since he was probably really close already and it wouldn’t take much but Michael just really wanted to get his mouth on him. Ashton was looking at him with begging eyes and then Michael started to jerk him off quickly and Ashton’s head fell onto his shoulder as he bit at hit and whimpered “Think you can make me come twice?” Ashton mumbled into his skin and it had Michael feeling confused.

“Ummm…twice?”

“I got off in the shower too” Ashton chuckled “I knew you were watching me when I was out there…and it really got me going”

“Shit” Michael moaned and ran his thumb against Ashton’s tip, causing him to shiver “I really wanna suck you off” and Ashton nodded as he let out a growl type of sound. Michael dropped to his knees and then Ashton was putting his one arm against the locker in front of him and pressing his forehead into his arm. Michael knew he was so close. He pushed himself right to his limit as he took all of Ashton that he could and started sucking hard and he could hear Ashton breathing heavy above him. Michael gripped one of Ashton’s thighs hard and dug his nails into his skin causing Ashton to buck into his mouth a little but Michael didn’t even mind; he loved it in fact. So he used both of his hands to grip at Ashton’s hips then brought him more into mouth instead of moving his mouth down and he knew Ashton got the message of what he wanted him to do when he moaned out loudly and whimpered a “Fuck, Michael” Soon Ashton was fucking hard into Michael’s mouth and Michael felt the tears swelling up in his eyes but he was loving every second of this. It didn’t take long for Ashton to be coming down his throat and then Michael was standing back up and Ashton leaned against him.

“Holy fucking shit” Ashton breathed out and it had both of them laughing and then something occurred to Michael that his lust filled brain hadn’t remembered before.

“Oh fuck” Michael groaned and Ashton backed away from him a bit so he could look at him.

“What’s wrong?”

“I was supposed to meet Luke by his locker…we’ve got detention and he doesn’t know where it’s at” Ashton was then backing up and grabbing his phone off the bench, still butt naked.

“You should still probably hurry but lunch only started like 2 minutes ago” and Michael relaxed a bit as he nodded.  
They both got dressed quickly and then they were fast walking out of there and back towards the part of the school where Michael was used to being.

“It feels so fucking weird back there” Michael as they were just getting out of B wing.

“What in B wing?”

“Yeah...I mean at least I’ll have some good memories of it now though” Michael smirked and Ashton just rolled his eyes as he playfully bumped into him “So did you talk to Calum last night about the…thing?” Michael didn’t really know what to call it honestly.

“Yeah…I talked to him” Ashton smiled but still kept looking forward.

“And?”

“He agreed”

“Awesome” Michael said in some song type tone and then he looked over to see Ashton nodding and biting his lip as he tried not to smile “You’re blushing….why are you blushing Ashton?” Michael teased as he started to poke at Ashton’s cheeks and Ashton rolled his eyes.

“I don’t have to tell you everything we do”

“Yeah I think you do actually. If we start secretly hooking up them we might as well not even be doing this 4-way thing. There can’t be any secrets”

“Alright…Jesus” Ashton chuckled “I kissed, Cal last night” and Michael looked over to his cheeks getting even more red. Michael thought it was adorable.

“Awww” Michael said starting to poke Ashton’s cheek again “You guys are so cute…so did you guys do anything else?” Michael said wiggiling his eyebrows and Ashton laughed before shaking his head “no”

“He’s not like, Luke. He takes a while to warm up to people and he’s actually really innocent”

“Hey” Michael said getting a bit offended “Luke’s innocent too”

“No he isn’t” Ashton laughed loudly and Michael scowled at him “We just all thought he was but it turns out he isn’t at all. The whole innocent thing was just an act”

“Maybe Calum is like that too” Michael smirked.

“No” Ashton said right away “He isn’t”

“Yeah we’ll see” Michael hummed and Ashton just glared at him.  
Right before they got to the cafeteria they told each other that they would meet up at Luke’s locker after school then Michael was jogging towards Luke’s locker at the end of the hallway. Surely enough the blond boy was still standing at his locker and Michael started to feel bad that he made him wait all because of his dirty urges “I’m sorry” Michael shot out before he even got in front of Luke and Luke frowned then looked back to the floor “We had our gym class combined with the gym class in B wing so I had to walk all the way from there” which was true but for now Michael was going to leave out the part about him and Ashton getting each other of in the locker room. It wasn’t like it was a secret, they were allowed to do that, but Michael was still in shock that it had actually happened; plus Luke really seemed to be mad at him.

“It’s alright” Luke mumbled then he started walking. Michael let out a breath and jogged to catch up to him.

“We’re really only like 5 minutes late, Luke” He put an arm around him and thankfully Luke didn’t shy away from the touch “We’ll be fine”

“So they won’t kill us?” Luke smiled a bit and Michael leaned forward wanting to kiss him but then he remembered that just a few minutes ago he had Ashton’s dick in his mouth; not to mention that the inside of his mouth still tasted like his come and Michael would feel bad for kissing Luke at a time like this. Instead he pecked a kiss to his cheek then his temple and grabbed his hand as they walked to the detention room. He still wasn’t sure how his life had come to sucking off the football captain in the locker room and then holding hands and getting to kiss the boy he’s been in love with for year’s right after that. This must be some insane dream but it was a dream Michael never wanted to wake up from.

  
*

“So did you know anyone else in the other P.E class?” Luke suddenly said and Michael just nodded as he took a few sips of his water that he got from the vending machine.

“Yeah…I knew a couple kids”

“Like who?” and Michael had a feeling he would have to tell Luke about the Ashton thing right this second if he kept asking all these questions.

“Well…like Ashton” and Luke instantly sat up.

“Ash was in there?”

“Mhm” Michael hummed and then he was looking up at Luke “Have you seen the way that kid plays football? It’s fucking insane”

“Is he really good?” Luke still had that excited tone.

“Amazing” Michael smiled “He’s a man of many talents” Michael looked away and hoped Luke would pick up on his sneaky tone so Luke would just guess that Ashton got him off in the locker room but he knew he wouldn’t.

“What do you mean?” Luke laughed a bit.

“Well…” Michael kept scribbling something into the desk then he was smirking again “Ashton showed me some of the drawings in the locker room” and Michael really hoped that Luke got the secret message; after all, Luke was the one who started it.

“The drawings?” and Michael rolled his eyes

“Yeah…he’s really fucking good at showing me those drawings” and Luke still had that confused look on his face then his eyes went wide and he laughed out loud before slamming a hand over his mouth.

“You didn’t?” Luke said still gigging into his hand.

“Oh I did” Michael smiled and Luke just shook his head.

“So he just sucked you off right?” Luke whispered and Michael nodded as he almost started to get hard just thinking about it “He’s really good at it?”

“He’s like a fucking pro and he said that was his first time doing that but there’s no way. The kid was lying out of his ass”

“So how did it happen?”

“I’ll tell you the whole story later” Michael chuckled as he looked around. It wasn’t exactly a story he wanted to tell out in public like this and he knew Luke would want to hear the details just as much as Michael wanted to tell them.


	37. Calum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cute af Cashton chapter

Calum was sat on the floor against a book case as he flipped through the pages but every few seconds he would zone out and start thinking about something else entirely; that something else being Ashton. Last night he had fallen asleep with the boy and was able to finally kiss him as much as he wanted. He already missed kissing him and being near to him. He also noticed how Ashton’s arms were still wrapped around him when he woke up the next morning. Ashton had let him borrow one of his shirts and then just told him he could keep it since it was too small on him. It was of course a Florida State shirt but Calum loved it merely because it was Ashton’s. He woke up realizing that he hadn’t even had a nightmare after sleeping in Ashton’s arms and that hadn’t happened in months. Calum smiled remembering how he woke up the 2nd time to Ashton putting kisses all over his face. It was the best way he’s ever woken up and he can’t even remember the last time he woke up already feeling so happy.

He got to get ready for school with Ashton and then had breakfast with him and Calum couldn’t stop smiling over at the curly haired boy. Ashton would always return the smile. When they were in the parking lot, still in the car, Calum was about to open the door so they could start walking towards the school but then Ashton was cupping both of his cheeks and kissing him slowly and Calum kissed him back with just as much passion. That was the thing with Ashton, he always kissed Calum so gently and slowly but he put so much passion into it and Calum could feel it all over his body.

Calum hadn’t seen Ashton since this morning and even though it was only lunch he already missed him like crazy. Ashton just had this natural positive vibe coming off him at all times and with how happy Ashton always was it had Calum feeling happy too.

“Hey bub” a voice said to the left of him and Calum instantly smiled as he looked up at Ashton standing in between the two book cases.

“Hi” Calum bit at his lip and then Ashton was walking towards him and sitting down next to him on the floor with his legs out stretched.

“What’re you reading?” Ashton said curiously as he looked down at the book on Calum’s lap.

“Some book about World War 2. It’s kind of boring” Calum said honestly. Ashton was then smiling and taking a double look at the bookcase across from them.

“I love this book” Ashton said sitting up and grabbing a green book and then sitting next to Calum again.

“I didn’t know that you read” Calum simply said then Ashton was looking offended as he put a hand over his chest. Calum giggled and shook his head “I just mean with football and stuff…I figured you’d be too busy to read”

“Yeah, I haven’t read it in a while” Ashton started flipping through a few of the pages “Do you want me to read some of it to you?” Ashton said looking over to the boy and Calum started quickly nodding. Ashton smiled wide at the excited boy then opened the book to the first page as he started to read out loud. His deep voice was barely above a whisper as he read and it was so comforting. The only other sound that could be heard in the library was the ticking of the clock and Calum felt himself getting sleepy with how comforted he felt. Ashton always made him feel like that.

Ashton moved onto the 2nd page and Calum was already really enjoying the book. He got closer to Ashton and let his head fall on the boys’ shoulder. Ashton temporarily stopped reading to put a few kisses to the top of Calum’s head and Calum could feel him smiling which made him get that warm feeling in his stomach again. Ashton started to read again and then Calum looked down to see Ashton’s free hand that wasn’t holding the book just resting on his own lap. Calum bit at his lip nervously before softly grabbing Ashton’s hand and Ashton squeezed it back right away, as he still continued to read, then he was putting it back on his lap as Calum rubbed his face against Ashton’s shoulder. Calum could sit like this and listen to Ashton read to him for hours. He discovered that this was one of his favorite things to do with Ashton but honestly everything he did with Ashton was his favorite.

  
*

The end of lunch bell was ringing, ruining this beautiful moment, and the boys’ both jumped a little at the sudden loud noise. Calum let out a breath and forced himself to take his head off of Ashton’s shoulder.

“Did you like it?” Ashton said nervously like he was really hoping that Calum did and Calum nodded.

“I loved it” and he really did. They were only a chapter into the book but Calum was already so interested. He also felt like he was getting to know Ashton so much better after hearing a piece of his favorite book. Calum wanted to know as much about Ashton as he could.

“Do you want me to check it out? Then I can finish reading it to you” Ashton said reaching out and running his fingers through the front of Calum’s hair.

“Yeah” Calum said getting excited again and Ashton leaned in to give him a kiss on the cheek and then the temple before they were both standing up. Calum thought his heart was actually going to explode from beating so fast when Ashton grabbed his hand when they started walking towards the library front desk. Calum didn’t even know if Ashton was out yet or not and even though there were a lot of people around Calum still felt like this was a really big step for Ashton and Calum was so proud of him. He also felt so privileged that Ashton was doing something this big with him and he leaned into the curly haired boy to give his bare arm a small kiss, Calum just couldn’t help but kiss him all the time. Ashton smiled wide at him then he was squeezing Calum’s hand and rubbing his thumb in a circular motion around the boys’ fingers. Calum just felt so alive whenever he was with Ashton and he doesn’t even know how he survived so long without him.


	38. Ashton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm temporarily back. So in these next few chapters they all go on a date and it's super cute. Let me know what you think!

Ashton was putting his books in his locker at the end of the day before he was planning on meeting Calum at his locker. He made sure to grab the book that he checked out with at the library though and put it in his bag to take home. He wasn’t sure if Calum would want to stay at his house again tonight but he really hoped he would. His mom was always working and his siblings were always staying at their Grandma’s house so Ashton really did get lonely. Plus he just loved having Calum around. The boy made him so happy and hoped that he did the same thing for Calum cause Ashton knew that Calum deserved to be the happiest person in the world.

“Ash” said a voice behind him then he smiled when he seen Michael walking towards him from one of the classrooms “I’m taking Luke to the aquarium in the city cause I promised the little dork that I would so you in?” Michael always got straight to the point and Ashton already knew he wanted to go. He figures that Calum would feel the same.

“Awwww. That’s so cute” Ashton did a baby voice at Michael and Michael just glared at him.

“Fuck off” Michael said turning away from him and even though Ashton knew he wasn’t going to walk away he still grabbed the boys’ sweatshirt and made him face him again.

“I’m serious I think it’s cute” Ashton said playfully ruffling Michael’s hair “But yeah I’ll totally go”

“Alright. Meet at my house?” and Ashton nodded, still not taking his eyes off Michael and then Michael was nodding and turning around to leave but for some reason Ashton just knew he wasn’t done talking “Nice hickey’s by the way” Michael shouted over his shoulder and Ashton laughed at that. Just a couple days ago he was saying the same thing to Luke. Once Michael was out of sight Ashton reached up and he could feel the rough patches of skin on his neck. They could have been from either Michael or Calum last night and Ashton smiled at how strange it was to not know who he got the hickey’s from. It was a weird situation, that was for sure, but Ashton didn’t even care because these three boys were making him the happiest he’s ever been.

  
*

“You ever been to the aquarium?” Ashton asked Calum as they were on their way over to Michael’s house.

“No but I’ve always wanted to”

“Yeah it’ll be cool…I’ve never been either” Calum just hummed to himself but Ashton could tell how excited he was about going “You don’t have to but do you wanna stay at my house again tonight?” and Calum was taking a double look at him then smiling wide.

“Yeah…yeah I’d love to”

“Good” Ashton let out a half laugh at how happy he was that the boy agreed to stay with him again and then Calum was grabbing at his hand that wasn’t resting on the wheel. Calum really loved holding hands, Ashton figured out, but Ashton loved it just as much. It was such a simple act but it was something he always liked doing. When he was with Piper she never wanted to hold hands and would actually pull away if he ever tried to grab her hand in public. She also wasn’t a big fan of cuddling either and Ashton felt so unloved whenever she would roll away from him when he would try to cuddle with her before they fell asleep. Ashton was finally getting to experience those things and they meant even more to him because he never got them before.

Ashton looked over to Calum who was watching the trees pass out the side window and he loved how amazed Calum was by the most simple things. Ashton smiled to himself and brought Calum’s hand up to kiss it gently before putting it back on the middle consol. The action had Calum shyly smiling at him and Ashton just really wanted to kiss him properly. He knew there would be plenty of time for that though so he focused on the road so he wouldn’t end up crashing. Calum always distracted him without even knowing that he was doing it.

  
*

When they got into Michael’s house they could hear voices coming from inside the kitchen and soon they could see Luke and Michael both sitting on the counter side by side while Michael was on his phone and Luke was looking nervous next to him.

“Aye” Ashton said casually since they hadn’t even noticed that him and Calum had walked in. Luke and Michael both picked up their heads and Luke smiled but then Michael was going back to his phone.

“Hey guys. We’re just having trouble figuring out where the aquarium is” Luke sort of laughed but Michael looked discouraged.

“It’s supposed to be right here behind this coffee shop but it’s not loading” Michael started shaking his phone like he thought that would make it load and then Michael was properly looking up at Ashton

“Does your phone have GPS. Mine isn’t working”

“Yeah I got GPS” Ashton spoke and he felt Calum lean into him a bit so he reached a hand out to slightly rub at his lower back.

“Well that settles it then” Michael says clapping his hands together and hopping off the counter

“Ashton’s got shot gun” and then Michael was already starting to walk to the front door and Luke scurried off behind him. Ashton nodded but then he was looking to Calum like he was asking him if he would be okay in the back with Luke and Calum just smiled.  
Soon they were all pilling into Michael’s jeep and then Michael was saying the address out loud for Ashton to put into his phone. It had been a while since he’s been to the city and even though it was only a half hour away he still didn’t go there very often. It was just that most of the stuff he needed to do was right in their little town.

“Oh and did you know that a certain type of jellyfish is immortal?” Ashton quietly chuckled when Luke kept saying random facts about sea animals to Calum. He looked in the corner of his eye to see Calum shaking his head but still seeming interested “Yeah there’s this jellyfish that has the ability to travel backwards to the stage of life that they started off at so they could easily just keep doing that for as long as they wanted to…which is insane”

“Are you the most excited to see the jellyfish?” Calum finally spoke and Ashton found himself smiling at his soft little voice.

“Yeah the jellyfish and the dolphins…oh and the octopus too” Luke was so excited and Ashton thought it was adorable. He looked over to see Michael fondly smiling as well as he bit at his lip “What are you most excited to see?” Luke continued and Calum hummed a bit as he seemed to be thinking.

“The sharks” he said and Ashton looked to see Michael nodding.

“I really wanna see the sharks too” Michael spoke “Do you think we’ll get to see them tear anything to shreds?” and Ashton rolled his eyes. He was pretty sure Calum had a different reason for wanting to see the sharks.

“I don’t know” Luke said in a cheeky voice “How about you jump in the tank and we’ll find out?” and Ashton and Calum both starting laughing. Michael narrowed his eyes at the road then took his free hand to reach back and hit Luke on the leg a few times until Luke was squirming away from him “I’m just kidding” Luke said once he stopped laughing and then Luke was leaning way forward in his seat and giving Michael a kiss on the cheek and then patting him on the chest. Michael put his hand over Luke’s then quickly kissed him on the cheek as well and Luke stayed close to him for a minute or two longer before he was sitting back in his seat “Oh and the octopus-“

“Luke spare us the sea animal facts please” Michael whined and it had Calum giggling a bit “I think we all know enough about sea animals now”

“Just one more” Luke begged and then Michael was letting out a breath.

“One more” he said sternly.

“An Octopus has three hearts and its blood is blue. How cool is that? Like I wish I had blue blood”

“I think we all wish we had blue blood” Michael mocked him and then Luke was playfully hitting him on the shoulder.

“What about Otters?” Ashton said briefly looking back at Luke “Do you know any facts about Otter’s?”  
And Luke seemed to be thinking as he chewed on his fingernail.

“Don’t encourage him please” Michael glared at Ashton and Ashton just smirked at him.

“Oh! Otter’s can be underwater for 4 minutes”

“That’s weak” Michael scoffed.

“Well how long can you hold your breath, Michael?” Luke shot back at him.

“10 minutes. I can hold my breath for 10 whole minutes, Luke” Michael said confidently and Luke and Calum both started laughing in the back “It’s true!”

“Well you might have to prove that to me”

“Nah” Michael shrugged “I don’t like to show off”

“Fair enough” Luke nodded and Michael just smiled.

They started to get closer to the city and the GPS was telling them directions almost constantly now. They realized there were a lot of twists and turns in order to get to the aquarium but they knew they didn’t have too much further to go. The buildings started to get taller the longer that they drove and there seemed to be less and less open spaces. Ashton liked going into the city because it was something different but he doesn’t think he could ever get used to how busy and crowded it always was. He figured Michael was used to driving in traffic though because it didn’t seem to faze him at all. Ashton knew he would be losing his mind if he was driving. He wasn’t good with driving under a bunch of pressure.

Soon they were entering the main part of the city and behind him Luke and Calum were both looking up at all the tall buildings and Calum was quietly humming along to a song on the radio. Calum would do the most simple things and Ashton was just beside himself with how cute he was. He cared about him so much.

“We’re here” Michael suddenly said when they were pulling into a parking lot. Ahead of them was this large light blue building that had giant pictures of sea animals on the front of it. Ashton found himself getting even more excited now that they were here and he was really glad that Luke had the idea to come here.

They were all getting out of the car and Ashton was walking side by side with Michael while Luke and Calum were behind them and Luke was still talking Calum’s ear off. Ashton turned around to see Calum smiling though so he knew it wasn’t bothering him. As soon as they got into the building Luke stood in the small area between Michael and Ashton and then Calum was standing beside Ashton. Ashton leaned into him because he just missed having the boy next to him and Calum shyly smiled as he lightly brushed his fingers against Ashton’s hand. Ashton was about to hold hands with him but then they were getting up to the front desk. Ashton noticed that Calum started taking his wallet out but Ashton softly pushed it away and told Calum that he would pay for him. He just wanted to; not to mention that it was officially a real date if Ashton paid for him.

When they left the entrance area all the boy’s looked up as they approached a tank that filled the entire wall. They were unsure of what animal was in there until they seen a seal swim in front of the glass. Luke gasped and then he was running towards it. He was pressed right up against the glass as another one swam by and Ashton looked up in amazement at how close they really were to the animals.

Calum had one hand placed against the glass as a small fish swam by and Ashton swears he would rather look at Calum and the way his eyes lit up than the animals in front of them.

“That seal over there looks like George Clooney” Luke suddenly said pointing to one and that had all the boys laughing. Michael walked up behind Luke and leaned his face against the back of his hair as he places a few kisses there then he was wrapping his arms around his waist. Ashton loved seeing them like this; Michael teased Luke a lot but it was times like this where he could see how much Luke really meant to him.

“Baby, did you take drugs before we left?” Michael spoke into his hair and Luke giggled.

“No! Seriously look...he really looks like George Clooney” Michael pulled Luke tighter into him then placed a kiss on his cheek. Ashton only looked away from them when he felt Calum reaching for his hand while the boy was still staring intently into the water in front of them. Ashton held his hand back and leaned into the boy to give him kiss on the temple and that had Calum looking over at him and smiling.

Luke was then leading them to the right and Ashton was still rubbing his thumb softly against Calum’s hand as they walked. They came up to the otters next and this is what Ashton was the most excited to see. They were all pressed against the glass in a line when Michael started laughing.

“Does anyone else remember that cartoon about Otter’s? What the hell was that called?”

“PB & J Otter” Ashton said straight away and they all laughed. It was his favorite show when he was a kid.

“Damn…that was a good show” Michael said tapping on the glass a bit. The continued walking and soon they were coming to a fork in the hallway.


	39. Luke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keep in mind that these next few chapters are being uploaded from my iPhone with shitty wifi from a coffee shop so sory if it's not perfectly edited. I just really wanted to update again

To the left the sign said Octopus and Jellyfish and to the right it said Sharks and Dolphins. Luke wasn’t too excited about seeing the sharks but he was dying to see the Jellyfish and Octopus. He seen Michael walking away from him and then he was stopping when he was next to Calum and looking back to see that Luke wasn’t following him.

“Let’s go see the sharks” Michael practically begged and Luke shook his head.

“They’re scary” Luke felt like a child but he just really didn’t want to see them.

“Yeah…” Ashton was suddenly agreeing “I’d rather see the jellyfish honestly”

“Well fine” Michael acted like he was upset and put an arm around Calum “Me and Calum will go see the sharks and you and Ash can go see the lame jellyfish”

“Okay” Luke said happily. Him and Ashton hadn’t had any time with just the two of them and plus this gave Michael a chance to be with Calum. Ashton smiled and gave Calum’s hand another squeeze before he started walking towards Luke and Michael was instantly turning Calum around so that they could walk towards the shark tank. Luke noticed that Ashton looked over at Calum and then Michael was turning his head to give Ashton a little nod, like he was telling Ashton that the boy would be fine. Luke could tell that Ashton really liked having Calum glued to his hip. He was just overprotective of the boy and Luke thought it was adorable.

“To the jellyfish?” Luke said and then Ashton was looking away from Calum and smiling at Luke.

“To the jellyfish” he nodded and then they were walking side by side. Luke hadn’t really gotten to talk to Ashton since they kissed and also couldn’t stop thinking about how Michael and him got off in the locker room. Michael had ended up telling him every detail of it and Luke wanted that so bad with Ashton. Luke bit at his lip as he looked down at Ashton’s hand and imaged how small his would look when Ashton was holding it. He knew Ashton didn’t have a problem with holding hands in public because he had just been doing that with Calum a few seconds ago but Luke still felt like it was too soon for him to make that kind of move “Are any of those immortal jellyfish in here?”

Ashton’s voice knocked Luke out of his thoughts and he started to look around the tank of the colorful Jellyfish.

“Ummm” Luke moved his eyes all over and finally spotted a blueish colored jellyfish “Oh right there” Luke pointed to the right side of the tank and Ashton followed his hand.

“It’s cool looking” Ashton rested one hand on the glass “I remember one Christmas I asked my mom for a jellyfish” and Luke laughed at that. He always used to ask his parents for absurd things too when he was younger “She got me a puppy instead and I was like…pissed about it” Ashton did a half laugh as he shook his head “Like what kind of kid would be pissed about getting a puppy for Christmas? But I was mad because it wasn’t a jellyfish”

“I’d get you a jellyfish if I could” Luke simply said and it had Ashton looking over at him and smiling wide. Their faces were only inches apart and being this up close Luke could see how beautiful Ashton’s eyes were. With the reflection of the water against them they almost looked gold.

“We could go take one from the ocean then share it”

“Yeah like I could have it on the weekends” Luke agreed as he shrugged.

“That would work” Ashton nodded then he was looking back into the tank “I’d want an orange one like that” Luke looked to see him pointing at the jellyfish that was almost entirely orange except for its red tentacles.

“Would you want to be immortal? You know if you could be” Luke watched the way Ashton bit at the inside of his cheek and squinted his eyes a bit like he was thinking. It really was a pretty loaded question.

“I don’t know if I would” he said still unsure. Ashton was then gazing at Luke as he did a crooked smile and Luke temporarily forgot how to breathe “Would you want to?”

“Yeah…I think I would” Luke said confidently. This was one of those topics that he would let enter his brain really late at night when he had too much time to think “I just don’t want to miss anything. You know like after I die they’ll be tons of new technology and new genres of music, people’s style will start to change and for all we know fucking…time travel could become possible. I just don’t want to miss any of that. I wanna be here for all of it” when he was done with his little ramble he looked over to see Ashton eyeing his face up and down with his mouth open slightly. Ashton swallowed hard then he was looking away and smiling a bit.

“I umm…I never thought about it like that before” he ran a hand through his hair and looked back to Luke “I guess I would want to then. I just wouldn’t want to be immortal alone though...you know? Like I’d want someone else to live forever with me. It’d be pretty shitty if everyone around me was dying and I knew that I wouldn’t ever have anyone that was permanent” and Luke felt himself nodding. He had never thought about that aspect of it.

“Yeah…” Luke looked down to his feet “I’d want someone with me too…guess life would be pretty pointless without someone to share it with”

“Exactly” Luke could see Ashton smiling down at him and he looked up to return it.

They were then walking over to see the Octopus and it was a lot bigger than what Luke expected.

“It’s kind of intimidating” Luke laughed as they got closer.

“Yeah it’s sort of freaking me out” Ashton laughed and stepped back a bit.

“Hey it has three hearts so that must mean it’s three times more loving than humans right?” and right then they both looked to see the Octopus gluing its self against the glass, looking a bit creepy.

“Yeah I don’t know about that” Ashton made a nervous face as he looked at it. Luke was then putting his hand up to the glass and he seen that one of the Octoupus’ tentacles moved so that it would be touching Luke’s hand if the glass wasn’t in between them.

“Did you see that?” Luke said in an excited voice as he looked back to Ashton and Ashton just nodded as he smiled a bit wearily at it “Come here, Ash” Luke said softly “It’s actually really cool”

“I think that thing could swallow me whole” Luke seen him physically shiver.

“Yeah maybe if you were in the water with it but it can’t get you” Luke never thought in a million years he would be trying to get Ashton to not be scared about something. Ashton just always seemed so strong and confident all the time but he really liked this version of him too. He thought that nervous Ashton was adorable. Luke was then urging him to come stand against the glass like he was and then Ashton started to take closer steps towards him.

“It’s so weird looking” Ashton was now standing right next to Luke as their arms brushed whenever Luke would move a bit “It looks like an alien”

“It’s a cute alien though”

“You think it’s cute?” Ashton widened his eyes and Luke just giggled.

“Yeah…look at it”

“Oh I’m looking at it” Ashton made a grossed out face at it. A thought suddenly occurred to Luke and he really wanted to voice it out loud but he wasn’t sure how Ashton would react. He decided to go for it anyways.

“Since it has three hearts do you think it could be in love with three different Octopus’?” and Ashton was smiling before but now it was gone as he looked blankly into the tank in front of them. He hummed a bit and started to rub his hand against his jaw. Luke started to think about how Ashton’s hand would feel on his own skin. They were probably rough feeling but gentle at the same time and Luke got a shiver just thinking about how good they would feel.

“Ummm…maybe” Ashton mumbled and Luke had a feeling that Ashton knew exactly why he asked that. He watched the curly haired boy start to rub at the hair on the back of his head and seemed like he was thinking hard about something “Do you think it could?” Ashton finally looked at Luke and Luke would only have to move a couple of inches for their lips to be meeting. He remembered how good Ashton’s lips felt against his before and how he felt like his whole body was on fire when Ashton lightly cupped his cheek. He missed those feelings so much. Luke’s feelings were the same for Calum, Michael and Ashton but yet his body reacted in different ways when he kissed Michael and when he kissed Ashton. He knew when the time came that he got to kiss Calum that it his body would react different with him as well.

“Yeah” Luke said quietly and Ashton’s eyes were still on him “I mean I think it could with even just one heart” and Ashton looked shocked for a few seconds and then he was letting out a breath and letting the side of his head fall against the glass tank. He smiled once he got the shocked look off his face then Luke was stepping even closer to him.

“I hope you mean what I think you do” Ashton whispered as he still looked tired while his head was resting on the glass.

“I do” Luke smiled and Ashton closed his eyes for a few seconds before opening them and smiling wide.

“I really miss kissing you” Ashton said just as breathlessly as before and Luke felt his heart speeding up as he nodded. The next thing he felt was Ashton’s soft hand touching his hip then it slowly slid upwards so that it was at the small of his back.

He looked up to see Ashton lifting his head off the glass and standing up straight as he brought Luke closer to him. The first thing that Luke just had to do was touch Ashton so he brought both of his hands up to Ashton’s cheeks and rubbed his thumbs against the skin before moving them down to his neck and sliding his fingers up into the boys’ hair. Ashton closed his eyes at that touch and then they Ashton was leaning in and softly touching his lips to Luke’s.

This kiss was a lot less nervous than their last one was and Ashton confidently and moved his lips against Luke’s as he rubbing his fingers up and down his spine. Luke couldn’t help but let out a small whimper when Ashton slid his tongue against his bottom lip and then Luke was opening up for him as he rubbing his fingers through Ashton’s hair. The kiss was still gentle and slow but Ashton’s tongue was pressing hard against Luke’s. Luke felt goosebumps all over his skin at how good Ashton was making him feel and he knew he was going to get hard soon if they kept this up. They both stopped kissing to press their foreheads together and catch their breath and then Ashton was smiling softly as he opened his eyes and Luke was too. Ashton moved his head to press a kiss to Luke’s cheek and then his neck as Luke let his hands fall from Ashton’s hair to start rubbing up his chest. Ashton just let his lips stay on Luke’s neck as he breathed against him and his hot breath was causing Luke to get chills. Ashton kissed him once more on the neck then he was facing him again.

“You’re so beautiful” Ashton barely spoke above a whisper and Luke felt like he was close to crying as he closed his eyes at the words

“I’ve been wanting to tell you that for a really long time”

“You h-have?” Luke’s voice came out sounding rough. Ashton nodded and moved one hand to put through the front of Luke’s hair

“You’re so beautiful too, Ash. Fuck, I’m sorry I didn’t notice you before. I was so fucking stupid and-“

“Hey hey hey” Ashton stopped him as he spoke quietly and rubbed the backs of his fingers across his cheek “You’re not stupid. I shouldn’t have been so scared…I should have just came to talk to you but-“Ashton tensed his jaw and looked away for a few seconds “I don’t know…I just couldn’t and that’s not your fault” Luke just stared at the amazing man standing in front of him in awe. He couldn’t believe that this was his life now. He didn’t know how he got so lucky.

“You’re incredible” Luke voiced his thoughts and then Ashton was blushing as he smiled and looked down at the floor.

“No you are” Ashton said in a playful tone and Luke let out a giggle before leaning forward again and kissing him. He felt Ashton’s strong arms wrap around his shoulders and Luke felt so safe in his arms like this. He didn’t ever want this aquarium date to end.


	40. Michael

Michael and Calum were sitting sideways against the glass as their knees touched, just watching all the sharks swim by. They weren’t as big as Michael expected but the shark that he had in mind was the one from Jaw’s so Michael figured he would be disappointed a bit. He still loved watching their quick movements in the water though and liked the way that Calum’s face would light up whenever they would come closer to the glass. He didn’t seem scared at all and Michael was a bit surprised. There was something that Michael really needed to say to Calum though; something that has been eating away at him.

“Hey umm…” Michael was looking down at his lap but he could see Calum look away from the tank to look at him so he made himself focus on the boy “Listen…I was a real dick to you before and I feel really bad about that. I don’t even have a good excuse for the way I acted but you didn’t deserve it. I’m sorry” Michael just watched Calum briefly smile then he was looking down to his lap.

“It’s okay” he said in a soft voice and Michael just wanted to reach out and hug him.

“If I’m being honest I was a bit intimidated by you” and that had Calum looking up and turning his head a bit in confusion. The action reminded him of a puppy and Michael had to suppress a smile “I was jealous of you because you had Luke’s attention and I couldn’t get it no matter how hard I tried” and Calum chuckled as he shook his head “What?” Michael said smiling.

“Well I was jealous of Luke because he had your attention and I couldn’t get it” Calum said honestly and then he was shyly looking back to the tank but Michael kept looking at him.

“Life’s funny like that I guess” Michael said casually and then he was bumping Calum’s leg to make the boy look at him. Calum did and he started to bite his lip once Michael smiled at him “You’ve got my attention now though so I hope you still like me” Calum’s face went beat red and Michael chuckled a bit.

“I do” Calum spoke quietly as smiled wide and Michael could see the little creases by his eyes. Michael was smiling back and then he heard Ashton’s voice.

“I’ve got an idea” Michael smirked “Go hide behind that wall over there and I’m gonna tell Ash that I lost you and we’ll see how badly he freaks out” Calum started giggling into his palm then he was jumping up and running off to stand behind the wall that ended the sharks exhibit. Michael got up and then Ashton and Luke were coming around the corner. Michael tried to put on his best worried face.

“How was the sharks?” Luke smiled and Michael already missed the boy but he forced himself to stay in character. He didn’t say anything as he bit at his nail then he seen Ashton start looking around.

“Umm….” Ashton began as his eyes roamed all around in a worried manor “Where’s Calum?”

“Shit” Michael rubbed a hand over his face “I lost him, Ash. I don’t where he went and I’m freaking the fuck out”

“You what?” Ashton’s eyes went wide “How the fuck did you lose him, Michael?” and Michael almost stopped the act with how furious Ashton already was

“I don’t know” Michael looked worried again as he shook his head “He went to the bathroom then he just never came back. I went to check in there and he was gone”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Ashton was stepping closer to Michael and Michael backed up, actually feeling a bit scared “Well we gotta find him. I knew I shouldn’t have left him with you” Ashton mumbled the last part but Michael caught it and he actually started to feel pretty shitty. He was about to tell Ashton that he was just kidding but then he heard Calum’s little giggle and he looked back to see the boy coming out from the corner. Michael looked back to see relief all over Ashton’s face as he let out a breath.

“Cal” Ashton’s voice cracked.

“I didn’t say that you could come out yet” Michael said in a fake upset voice as he looked at Calum again.

“I felt bad” Calum stuck out his lip and then instantly walked up to press himself against Ashton’s chest. Ashton didn’t hesitate to put his arms around the boys’ shoulders then closed his eyes for a few seconds before glaring up at Michael.

“So you didn’t really lose him?”

“Nah” Michael shrugged “I just wanted to see you freak out”

“You’re an asshole” Ashton shook his head but Michael could see that he was fighting smile. Michael’s smirk turned into a fond smile as he seen Ashton place a few kisses to the side of Calum’s face then they were separating but Calum still stayed glued to his side as Ashton swung an arm around his shoulder.

“So were the jellyfish interesting?” Michael looked to Luke and Luke started walking towards him then playfully bumped into him.

“They were actually” Luke said in a fake snotty tone.

“Oh were they now?” Michael smirked as he seen the fresh marks on Luke’s neck and then he was kissing his lips quickly and Luke nodded. Michael didn’t even feel that sting of jealously knowing that Luke had been kissing Ashton and he counted that as a really good sign.

Before this thing started he swore that it would take months for him to get used to the idea of Luke kissing other people but he was getting used to it a lot faster than he thought he would. All he did was smile up at Ashton then the curly haired boy winked at him before placing a kiss on the side of Calum’s forehead before they were continuing on seeing the rest of the aquarium. This day hadn’t even ended yet but Michael knew it was always going to be one of his favorites.


	41. Ashton

It was dark by the time they were finally leaving the city and Ashton was sat in the passenger seat again, watching all the bright light in the rear view mirror. Ashton kept looking over at Michael’s face and the way it lit up every time a car would pass by them. The car was dark whenever there wasn’t another car in sight and the only sounds that could be heard were the engine and the very quiet playing of some song by the Goo Goo Dolls on the radio. Ashton realized that Luke or Calum hadn’t said anything in the past ten minutes. A big smile overtook his face as he looked in the backseat to see Calum now in the middle as he had his head laying on Luke’s shoulder and a blanket stretched over the both of them as Luke laid his head on the window. Ashton looked at how cute they looked for a few more seconds before letting out a breath and facing the front again.

“I’m sorry about that thing back there with Calum” Michael suddenly said and Ashton took his head off the window to look at the boy “I didn’t know you were gonna get so upset” there was a different tone to Michael’s voice and it was one that Ashton didn’t hear very often. It was so soft and caring and usually it was only directed at Luke. Ashton felt actually privileged for having it directed at him.

“Don’t worry about it” he said tiredly and he hoped Michael didn’t think that he was still upset about it. Sure, it freaked him out then but Calum was safe and he was fine so that was all Ashton cared about.

“You trust me with him, right?” Michael looked at Ashton and had that same caring tone.

“Yeah” Ashton sternly nodded once “I trust you with him”

“Cause you know I wouldn’t ever let anything happen to him…just like I wouldn’t ever let anything happen to Luke” Michael was facing the road again and his hair almost changed color when a car with weird colored headlights drove by.

“I know you wouldn’t” Ashton said briefly looking back at the sleeping boy’s in the back “It’s just-“ Ashton let out a breath and ran a hand through his hair “After what Jared did to him I just get worried that something like that will happen again. You didn’t see him after that happened…and I’m glad you didn’t but he was fucking terrified. I don’t ever wanna see him like that again”

“Yeah…” Ashton watched Michael start rubbing at the slight stubble at his jaw as he kept his eyes on the road “That would scare the shit out of me too. I won’t…I won’t do anything like that to you again”

“T-thanks” Ashton nodded and looked back out the side window.

“I’m still gonna find other ways to mess with you though” Michael said in a serious tone then he was looking over to smirk at Ashton “Gotta get you back for the gym incident”

“The gym incident?” Ashton squinted at him “What was so bad about that? You got a blowjob out of it”

“Yeah but you teased me a bunch first…and you were probably doing all the stuff on the field just to get me going”

“You’re right” Ashton said in a cheeky tone “I was and it fucking worked”

“Shut up” Michael chuckled “And then there was that ‘Oh that was my first time giving someone a blowjob’ line. Which I know was total bullshit”

“It was not” Ashton said defensively “It’s true”

“Right” Michael said dragging it out “And you expect me to believe that you’re just naturally good at it?”

“Some people just are” Ashton shrugged. He honestly didn’t even feel like he did that good of a job but Michael seemed to think he did so Ashton was taking the compliment. 

“No one’s ever that good without having some practice” Michael said under his breath but Ashton heard him loud and clear.

“Do you miss it?” Ashton said smirking a bit and Michael glared at him before looking back to the road. Ashton then seen him briefly nod “Well I do too” Ashton said honestly “We should just hang out…you know just you and me” Ashton really wanted that. The only time it was just him and Michael was that day during gym and that wasn’t nearly enough time.

“We should” Michael did a friendly smile at him “But you and Cal should stay over tonight” and Ashton actually thought that was a great idea. He did plan on having Calum stay at his house tonight but this was even better.

“Sounds good” Ashton smiled back at him but then he was thinking of something else that he’s been wanting to ask Michael “It’s my last game this Friday though so do you think you and Luke would want to come?”

“Last game huh?” Michael said mainly to himself and then Ashton was nodding “Yeah we’ll go”

“Good” Ashton smiled and he was really excited that his boy’s would be there to see him play the championship game. He knew his nerves that night would be through the roof but it would be easier if he knew they were there with him.  
He felt himself getting tired again after the conversation ended. He put his face back on the cold window but it somehow felt comforting with the air vents blowing out warm air at him. He let the quiet rumble of the car lull him to sleep as he could hear Michael humming to himself.

  
*

“Ash” Ashton felt a hand slightly shaking his shoulder and Ashton’s eyes were a bit blurry when he first opened them then he could see Michael to the left of him. He nodded for no apparent reason then he started to get out of the car when he seen that Michael was. He looked up to see Luke and Calum walking into the front door then him and Michael were doing the same “You and Cal can sleep in the guest room” Michael yawned and then Ashton was walking up behind Calum to rest his head on the back of his shoulder. Calum leaned back into the touch and Ashton was so tired the he felt like he could fall asleep standing up “I’ll show you where it is” Michael chuckled, seeing how tired they were.

Luke was currently leaning against the back of the couch as he looked just as exhausted and Calum and Ashton both said night to him. Michael was then leading Calum and Ashton up the stairs where they had been last time they were at his house but this time they were turning right instead of left . Calum was walking in front of Ashton and then Michael was stopping at a doorway and Ashton chuckled a bit when he seen Calum just fall face down into the mattress.

“You tired pup?” Ashton said leaning against the doorway where Michael was also standing. Calum just made a “mhm” sound into the blankets then he was crawling more up the bed and resting his head on the left pillow. Ashton just realized that was the first time he really called Calum a nickname, other than “Cal”, but he liked how it sounded. Calum did remind him of a puppy.

“There’s extra blankets in that closet over there if you want them” Michael said quietly and pointing to the left side of the room. Ashton nodded then rubbed at his eyes at few times and Michael was walking past him and Ashton thought he was already leaving but then Michael was turning around with a smile and grabbing Ashton’s shirt as he pulled him into a soft kiss. Ashton couldn’t help but reach out and touch him as he put his hand on Michael’s hip and softly rubbed at it.

“Night” Michael said quietly against his lips before giving the boy one more peck.

“Night” Ashton smiled wide and leaned forward to kiss the boys’ cheek. He thought he seen Michael’s face getting a bit red but the blue haired boy was turning around before Ashton could really tell. Ashton stood there until Michael was out of sight then he was walking into the room. Calum looked like he was already fast asleep as he still was in the same position as before with his face into the pillow.

Ashton stripped down to his boxers knowing that he couldn’t ever sleep in his jeans, even though he felt too tired to get out of his clothes, then he was slipping in next to the boy. Ashton got under the covers then just laid on his side as he started to brush his fingers up and down Calum’s spine. Calum made a little whimpering sound then he was turning to face Ashton while his eyes were just barely opened

“Wanna get under the blanket?” Ashton softly whispred as he ran a hand through Calum’s hair. Calum nodded but didn’t move for a few seconds then he was rolling onto his back and unbuttoning his jeans. Ashton tried not to let his mouth fall open with how turned on he was when Calum started getting them off and then he was sitting up before pulling his sweater over his head.

Ashton had never seen this much of him and all he watned to do was trail his hands all over the boys’ body but he didn’t want to do too much and make the boy uncomfortable.

Ashton watched in silence as Calum threw his clothes to the floor then got under the blankets so that most of his bare back was still showing. Calum closed his eyes then he was getting closer to Ashton and Ashton took that as a sign that the boy wanted to be touched so he reached out and started trailing his fingers up his back again and Calum let out a breath that ended in small whimper. Ashton got even closer to him and started rubbing his whole hand up and down the boys’ back then leaned down to place a kiss on the side of his hair

“Did you have fun today?” Ashton said quietly as he laid down completely on his side and Calum opened his eyes as he smiled.

“Yeah…can we do that again sometime?”

“Definitely” Ashton grinned at him and leaned down to kiss his neck then his shoulder. Ashton just couldn’t ever get enough of him “Michael didn’t bug you too much did he?” Ashton said facing him again and wiping some of his curls off his forehead.

“No” Calum giggled “He apologized actually” and then Ashton started to frown.

“Apologized?” Ashton scrunched up his face “What did he apologize for?”

“I don’t know” Calum shyly smiled

“He just wasn’t always so nice to me…” and then Calum seen Ashton looking like he was going to get upset “He was never mean to me or anything like that but he just ignored me a lot”

“I’m sorry” Ashton rubbed his fingers across Calum’s cheek. He wasn’t even sure what he was apologizing for but he just hated knowing that there was a time when Michael ignored Calum when Calum has always been so head over heels for him.

“It’s all better now” Calum smiled sweetly.

“Yeah…it is” Ashton said breathlessly then he was leaning forward and giving Calum a soft kiss on the lips. Calum got closer to him and pressed his body right up against Ashton’s and Ashton put an arm around his back and placed his palm between the boys’ shoulders as he let out a stuttered breath and deepened the kiss a bit.

Ashton was surprised at Calum’s next movement and he coudltn help but let out a quiet moan when Calum’s hand started trailing lower down his stomach so that he was just rubbing at the skin right above his boxers. It was driving Ashton crazy and Calum’s touch felt so good. Ashton moved his hand that was on Calum’s back to lightly grip at his neck and it only made Calum kiss him harder. Ashton didn’t know what was happening but he knew that he didn’t want it to stop. He let out another moan into Calum’s mouth when the boy wrapped one leg around him and started grinding up against him

“Fuck, Cal” Ashton whispered. Ashton wasn’t sure what Calum’s intentintions were but he knew he was getting very hard in his boxers and he didn’t want Calum feeling like he needed to do something that he wasn’t comfortable with.

Ashton backed up, planning on saying something about it, but then he was right back to kissing the boy and rubbing his hand through his hair. Ashton forced himself to back away again and this time he knew they had to talk about this

“You know you don’t have to do anything you aren’t comfortable with” Ashton whispered as he ran a thumb over Calum’s cheek. They were still both out of breath and Ashton already missed Calum’s lips and hands roaming over his skin. Calum just nodded then his hand started trailing up Ashton’s stomach like he couldn’t believe that Ashton was real and he just wanted to touch every part of him.

“I wanna make you feel good. Can I do that?” Calum finally said and all that Ashton’s lust filled brain could think of was “God yes”.

“Y-yeah….fuck…please” Ashton was just rambling now and his voice sounded so weak but Calum just softly smiled before leaning into him again and putting open mouth kisses all over his neck as he grinded into him again.


	42. Calum

Ashton was rolling onto his back and bringing Calum with him as he changed positions and then Calum was straddling his hips and he sat up at bit and started leaving kissing down his stomach.

Calum thought back to how when they had their first kiss Ashton seemed to really love it whenever he would get close to his nipples so Calum moved upwards and started sucking on his right nipple as he still was grinding against him. Ashton was letting out a loud moan and Calum looked up to see him now putting a hand over his own mouth as he closed his eyes, trying not to be too loud. Calum smiled and started letting his hand roam up Ashton’s side as he started licking at the nipple and taking it between his lips again. Ashton’s hands that were on Calum’s thighs gripped harder and he could feel Ashton’s hard dick against his own as he continued to move.

Calum started to drift downwards again and then he was placing kisses right above Ashton’s boxers. He still couldn’t believe this was actually happening but he wanted it so bad. Calum couldn’t wait any longer and he was pulling the boys’ boxers down in one tug. Ashton let out a breath when Calum got his hand on him and started pumping his hand up and down at a slow pace. Calum looked up to see Ashton already looking down at him as he bit at his lip and Calum’s never seen him looked so wrecked. It was turning him on so much and then he was bending down to lick at the tip and Ashton kept letting out whimpers at each movement he would do. He loved hearing all these beautiful sounds come out of Ashton’s mouth and knowing that he was the reason for them was making him whimper himself.

Calum got lower and started sucking Ashton’s balls between his lips and it instantly had Ashton letting out a string of curse words and then heavily breathing as he moved a hand down to start brushing his fingers through Calum’s hair. Calum started sucking on the tip again and slowly started to take more of Ashton’s dick. Calum got a steady pace going and Ashton started to trail his fingers down his face.

“Fuck j-just like that…feels so good pup” and Calum was moaning around his dick when Ashton used the nickname again. He loved it so much. Calum started to use his tongue more every time he would come back up the tip and Ashton was now constantly letting out moans as Calum could feel the boys’ thighs start to shake under him. He knew he was close.

Calum took his mouth off just to lick a few times Ashton’s dick then he was back to going down on it at a fast pace. Soon Ashton was coming and Calum made sure to swallow it all before he was pumping Ashton through his high and then backing up to rest his on the boys’ thigh. He watched as Ashton’s chest moved up and down in a fast motion and his hand was gripping at his own hair as his bicep kept flexing. His eyes were closed shut as his breathing was still erratic and Calum just couldn’t tear his eyes away. He loved seeing Ashton in this state

“Oh shit” Ashton breathed out in a slightly high pitched tone. He was then opening his eyes and sitting up as he helped Calum sit up too. Calum was confused as to what he was doing until Ashton was lifting him up a bit and placing him on his lap as he sat back against the headboard. Calum instantly gripped his hands on Ashton’s neck as Ashton wrapped both arms around Calum’s torso, holding him tight. Ashton took one arm from around Calum’s back and quickly palming him through his boxers “Okay?” Ashton said as his hand stilled for a moment and Calum eagerly nodded. Ashton’s hand just felt so good and he was already so close. This time Ashton put his hand back but then he was sliding Calum’s boxers down as much as he could and quickly starting to pump him. Calum let out a whimper at the sudden touch and then Ashton was making a growl type of noise, that was possibly the hottest thing Calum’s heard, before he was moving his head and fiercely sucking marks into Calum’s neck.

Ashton faced Calum again and then he was patting his thighs. 

“Lay down for me, baby” Ashton's voice was low and rough and Calum quickly got off of Ashton and laid on his back on the other side of the bed.

Ashton was on top of him in a second and then he was sucking down on Calum’s dick all at once. Calum flexed his stomach in attempt to not immediately hit his orgasm just at the feeling of Ashton’s lips. He wanted this to last for so much longer but he knew he couldn’t hold back anymore.

“A-Ash” Calum managed to whimper out right before he was releasing himself. Ashton pulled off after working him through it then he was scooting up on the bed a bit and laying his head on Calum’s chest. Calum started tracing shapes on the boys’ back and Ashton hummed at the feeling of it.

Once Ashton seemed to catch his breath he started putting quick kisses all over Calum’s chest that made the boy start giggling. Ashton sat up on his elbows and got right above the boy as he smiled down at him

“Turns out Michael was right about you” and Calum was confused but then Ashton was smiling wider and pressing a kiss to his nose and then his lips “You aren’t as innocent as you look” and Calum couldn’t stop his cheeks from turning red. Ashton laughed and started kissing Calum’s cheeks so that it made a noise and it made Calum start giggling again “I like it though” Ashton bent down to start kissing softly at his neck “And I really like you” Ashton faced him again and his joking face turned into a more serious one.

“I really like you too, Ash” Calum managed to get out and he felt so close to crying with how much he really cared for this boy. He still couldn’t believe that Ashton cared about him too. Ashton smiled wide like it was the best things he’s ever heard and pressed kisses all over Calum’s face.

They just laid there lazily kissing until Ashton was pulling his and Calum’s boxers up and then he was laying on his back and urging Calum to come lay on his chest. Calum did of course and he started rubbing his hand up and down his stomach until he knew the boy was fast asleep.


	43. Luke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm baaaaaack. The time I spent away from the internet was awful but whatever. I can't wait to show you guys these next few chapters. I'll probably be uploading about 4 chapters today woo!

The field lights were lighting up the dark sky as Luke, Calum and Michael all stood up against the fence as they were waiting for the game to start. Luke of course had gone to a game before this but he hadn’t really paid attention to Ashton the last time because they weren’t friends back then. Luke thought it was crazy how that wasn’t even that long ago but already so much had changed. He was really looking forward to seeing Ashton play especially since Michael kept going on about how good he was. Luke thought it was cute the way Michael was bragging about Ashton’s playing abilities though.

Michael and Calum both had their eyes fixed on the field in front of them but Luke found himself looking behind at the stands a bit and stuffing his hands in his jacket pockets from feeling a cold breeze hit his face. He looked over to see Calum slightly shaking as well and he felt bad. Luke reached out to put an arm around Calum’s waist and brought the boy closer so that he was pressed up against his side. He felt the boy smile as Calum dug his face into Luke’s neck a bit then leaned up to give his cheek a quick kiss.

Lately Ashton and Michael had been hanging out a lot, which Luke was so happy for because he was actually worried before that they wouldn’t ever get along, so it had given Luke lots of time to be with Calum and he knew they were getting closer. He loved how Calum was starting to open up to him more and he had started telling Luke little things about himself. It was such a big step and Luke was so happy that Calum was letting him in like this. Luke couldn’t help the big smile that came over his face and he bent down a bit to kiss the tip of his nose before resting his head against Calum’s.

“What number is Ash again?” Luke suddenly asked because for some reason he couldn’t remember. Michael was then squinting his eyes at the boy and shaking his head.

“Luke, how do you not know what number he is?”

“I just can’t remember”

“15” Michael said after sighing “You’re the worst boyfriend ever…not even remembering his number. Geesh” and Calum gigged into Luke’s neck a bit.

“Am not” Luke pouted and he knew Michael would stop the teasing once he started to seem sad. Michael smiled and looked out to the field and then he was giving in. He got closer to Luke and Calum and wrapped one arm around both of them.

“You know I’m just kidding, Lukey” Michael said kissing his cheek. Luke blushed as he nodded and looked down.

Michael ended up staying close to them like that until they all went to go get a hot chocolate and Luke just had to get some popcorn. When they were getting back at their spot near the fence the crowd was all of a sudden starting to go nuts and they all looked to see the players coming onto the field. The crowd only got louder as more of the players jogged onto the green grass and Luke was frantically looking for number 15. Calum and Michael seemed to be doing the same thing.

Soon Luke’s eyes were landing on Ashton as he stood with his arms cross over his chest while he was having a conversation with the coach. Luke just watched the way he kept nodding and looking the most serious Luke’s ever seen him. The coach was then hitting him on the shoulder pad and then Ashton was jogging back to be with the rest of his team. Luke bit at his lip and tried not to be too obvious as he checked Ashton out but he just couldn’t help it; the boy looked so good.

When the game officially started Luke still kept his eyes glued to Ashton and watched him talk to a few of the other players like he was giving them orders with the way he was pointing and talking with his hands. Luke really liked seeing him like this and it was no wonder Michael said he liked watching him play so much. The first play started and Ashton immediately had the ball in his hand as he took off towards the touchdown line. Luke widened his eyes at how fast Ashton really was and he still kept his eyes on the boy even after he threw the ball across the field. Luke wouldn’t have even been able to throw half of that distance.

“Holy shit” Luke whispered. Michael was then leaning forward to look past Calum as he smirked at Luke.

“Didn’t I tell you? He’s so fucking good” Luke just nodded, still in shock then he was looking back to Ashton who was walking confidently down the field. The boy was in his element out there and Luke loved seeing this side of him. He really seemed to be the one leading the rest of the team and he had this cocky look to him at all times but it wasn’t a bad thing. It was actually really turning Luke on and he could tell Michael felt the same as he looked over to see the boy biting at his lip and moving his eyes all over Ashton. Luke looked to see Calum with a soft smile on his face as he watched Ashton and he looked so proud.

Ashton of course had been tackled a few times but there was one time in particular that had all three of the boys cringing and actually worried about him.  
It was the first play after half time and Luke and Calum had just gone to the concession stand to get some sweets. They came back just in time to see Ashton running with the ball on a full sprint then to his right one of the other players seemed to be come out of nowhere and he was knocking Ashton hard into the ground. Luke froze when Ashton didn’t get up right away like he had the other times and he looked over to see Michael and Calum just as worried. Ashton was still on the ground as he put an arm over his helmet and kept moving his head.

“Ash” Calum whimpered and Luke put an arm around him to try and comfort the boy. Thankfully Ashton was sitting up and then one of his teammates were reaching out a hand and helping him up. He really wasn’t on the ground for very long but to Luke it felt like an eternity because he was so worried about the boy actually being really hurt. Not to mention that Luke just hated seeing people in pain; especially people he cared about.  
Ashton got right back into the game again as the next play started and Luke couldn’t believe how he went straight back to how he was playing before. Luke knew he wouldn’t ever be able to continue after taking a hard hit like that but clearly Ashton was a lot stronger than him.

“I’m actually really bummed this is his last game” Luke suddenly said “We should have been coming to these games a long time ago”

“I know….” Michael said sadly but then he was looking at Luke with a smile “But before we never cared about any of the players so we never had a reason to come watch the games”

“Yeah…that’s true” Luke shrugged. He feels like he wouldn’t even have interest in the game if Ashton wasn’t out there. He was never big on sports and he didn’t like watching them either so he knew Ashton was the reason he was so interested on the game.

Their team was ahead by a significant amount so Luke was sure they would win but he still found himself feeling nervous when there was a minute left on the clock until the game ended. Calum was biting at his nails next to him and Luke chuckled before looking back to the field. They were a couple of yards away from the touchdown line when the ball was handed off to Ashton and he was taking off. Luke swore he held his breath the whole time Ashton was running and then he was crossing the touchdown line. Luke felt himself smiling so wide that his cheeks hurt when all the other players ran over to Ashton and were all jumping up and down around him. Luke couldn’t see Ashton anymore with all the people around him but he knew how happy the boy must be.

When the crowd started to thin out Luke could see Ashton again as he now walked with his helmet in his hand as he made their way towards the exit of the field. There were three other boy’s at his side and they were all talking to him at one time as he just nodded and looked down at his feet as he walked. He had a huge smile on his face though and his hair was pushed back from him pouring water over his head before. When they got off the field and onto the sidewalk there were a bunch of other students coming up to Ashton and Luke just stared in awe at all the attention he was getting. Luke knew he was popular but before now he never really paid attention so he really didn’t know how well liked he really was.

“Sometimes I forget” Michael chuckled.

“Forget what?” Calum said and Michael was briefly smiling at him before looking back to Ashton.

“I just forget how popular he really is cause he never seems like that when he’s hanging out with us” and Luke nodded. He knew exactly what Michael meant. Ashton was just so down to earth and it was easy to forget that he was one of the most liked people in their school. Most popular kids had attitudes and seemed to think they were better than everyone else but not Ashton; he never acted like that. He was just so caring and sweet all the time and he really seemed to like taking care of people. Luke sees how he is with Calum and he’s just so protective of him. Ashton just has such a big heart.

Ashton finished talking with the people that were all around him then he was looking around, seeming like he was looking for someone. Luke wanted to believe that he was looking for them but he really wasn’t sure. Soon though Ashton’s eyes were landing over where they were and he was smiling. He was then pointing towards the school and seemed like he mouthed “locker room” and Luke seen Michael nod at him. The crowd of people were trapping him in so he could only get out by going the opposite way then he was walking off towards the school with the rest of his team “I think he wants us to meet him outside the locker room” Luke nodded at Michael’s words then they were making their way towards the school.


	44. Michael

They were all standing against the wall outside the locker room in the dimly lit hallway as Michael played some game on his phone and Calum was leaning his head on Luke’s shoulder. They had seen a few kids come out of the locker room but none of them were Ashton.  
Sure the way Ashton played out there had, once again, completely turned him on but this time he was able to calm himself down so that Ashton wouldn’t start teasing him like last time.

The locker room door was opening and they all looked up like they just knew it would be Ashton and the out came the curly haired boy with a big smile. As soon as he got close enough to them Luke and Calum both attacked him and hugged him tight and Ashton laughed before putting his arms around both of them.

“You were so good out there, Ash” Michael heard Calum mumbled into Ashton’s chest.

“For real” Luke said straight away “You were fucking amazing”

“Awww guys” Ashton said as he held them tighter and put kisses to both of their heads. Michael thought they were all being adorable but he started to feel a bit left out if he was being honest. As if like clockwork Ashton was letting them go then looking at Michael with a smirk before he glanced down at his crotch and looked back up to Michael with his eyebrows raised “You alright down there?” he teased and Michael should have seen that coming.

“Fuck off” Michael did a half laugh as he rolled his eyes away. Ashton was then stepping closer to him and Michael could swear that Ashton was getting ready to kiss him but then Ashton’s name was being called from down the hallway. All four of them looked to the right and there was three guys a few feet away from them. One of them Michael recognized as Ashton’s coach and the other’s were wearing matching green coats. Ashton was giving Michael a sympathetic smile then looking at the other two boys.

“I’ll be right back” he said to them and Michael felt like Ashton’s eyes lingered on him more than Luke and Calum. Ashton was then was walking towards the three men as he now wore light washed jeans and a black Van Halen t-shirt that had a bunch of tour dates on the back. Michael watched him cautiously and he didn’t know why he was feeling so nervous. When Ashton got right in front of his coach one of the guys in the green coat was turning so that his back was facing them and Michael could clearly see the lettering on the back as it read “Florida State University”.

“Oh my god” Calum whispered next to him and Michael was tearing his eyes away from Ashton to look at the boy.

“What?”

“Those guys…they’re from Florida State. Ashton really wants to play football for them” Calum said as his eyes widened. Michael wondered if they were accepting him into the school right this second but he was pretty sure it wasn’t that simple. One of the guys patted Ashton on the back and then Ashton was shaking hands with the both of them before they were walking away. His coach was then saying a few words to him and then Ashton was walking back towards them; looking even more happy than before.

“What was that about?” Michael asked curiously as Ashton stood next to him.

“Oh my god” Ashton put a hand over his mouth then he was resting his hands on his head “They said they really liked the way I was playing out there and then they said that it’s not entirely up to them but I could have a really good chance of playing for them next season. Me? Playing for fucking Florida State? I’m losing my mind right now” and Michael has never seen him this excited.

“I’m so proud of you Ashton” Luke said gluing himself to Ashton’s side again and Calum was fondly smiling at him.

“Well we should celebrate” Michael smirked and Ashton looked confused “There’s a party...down the road. We should go” he could see Luke and Calum’s nervous faces when he brought up the party and he should have known that neither of them would be up for it.

“I mean it has been a while since I’ve been to a party” Ashton said looking like he was considering it.

“You guys probably don’t wanna go though, do you?” Ashton looked over at Luke and Calum and they were looking a bit ashamed as they shook their head “Well would you care if just me and Michael went?” and Michael was so glad that he said that. He didn’t want to make it obvious with how badly he wanted to go to this party with Ashton.

“No” Luke smiled “We can just hang out at Michael’s house right?” Luke said looking to Michael.

“Yeah I’ll just drop you guys off” Michael said quickly. He didn’t even know why but he just really felt the need to get drunk and plus he felt like partying with Ashton was exactly what he needed. It had been so long since he’s been to a party “So it’s settled” Michael clapped his hands together and seen Ashton smiling at him. He was actually really excited about this and the school creeped him out after classes were over so he couldn’t wait to get out of here.

*

“So why haven’t you been to a party in a while?” Michael couldn’t help but ask as he sat in the passenger seat of Ashton’s car “As a football player I thought it was like a requirement to go to all the parties” he teased and Ashton just chuckled as he put on his blinker. Michael thought he looked so attractive when he drove since this was the first time he was seeing him do it; yet again he always thought Ashton looked attractive.

“Just got sick of them. Piper would get so pissed when I didn’t go to them though” and that had Michael taking a second look at him. That was a name that Ashton hadn’t ever mentioned before and there had to be a reason why he hadn’t.

“Ummm…Piper?” and then Ashton was looking at Michael like he hadn’t even realized he mentioned her and now he regretted it.

“Yeah…my ex. She was awful” it looked painful for Ashton to even talk about her but Michael just wanted to know more. He liked hearing new things about Ashton and Calum and Luke as well.

“How long were you with her?”

“Too long” Ashton chuckled again but Michael could tell he was doing it just so the conversation wouldn’t get too serious. Michael just nodded and watched the way the city lights would flicker off Ashton’s face as they drove. He hated knowing that Ashton was in an unhealthy relationship before this. He just deserved so much better and Michael didn’t like knowing that he had to go through something like that. He just hoped that Ashton was happy with where he was at now.

“But you’re happy now…right?” Michael didn’t even mean to voice his thoughts and he sounded so weak; it made him cringe and hate himself. Ashton laughed a bit as he shook his head.

“Michael…I’m literally the happiest I’ve ever been” he looked straight at the boy in the passenger seat and Michael felt his heart jump in his chest “And it’s all because of you, Luke and Calum”

“Well good” Michael bit at his lip and had to look away from Ashton’s intense stare.

They were turning into the driveway only a minute later and as soon as Ashton parked Michael was going to grab for the door but then Ashton was leaning over and bringing him into a kiss. It shocked Michael at first but then he was rubbing his hands through Ashton’s still damp hair as he kissed him back just as hard. Michael was so tempted to just pull Ashton onto his lap but he knew they would never leave the car if he did that. He actually considered just sitting in here and making out with Ashton for the rest of the night but he just really needed to get drunk and he wasn’t even sure why. Ashton’s lips started to slow down a bit then he was breathing out against Michael before backing up and smiling of course; he was always smiling and Michael loved it. Ashton pecked one more quick kiss to Michael’s lips and his jaw then he was going to grab the door.

“Alright. Let’s go get trashed” Ashton smirked and Michael let out a laugh.

“You know…I am liking you more and more everyday”

“Hope you know how to hold your liquor, Clifford”

“I’m sure I can better than you” Michael snapped back and Ashton just smiled again before getting out of the car.

“We’ll see about that”


	45. Luke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short Cake chapter to just let you know what they're doing at Michael's (there will be more cake to come though of course)

Luke and Calum were sitting on the floor right below the TV as they played video games and it’s been what they’ve been doing ever since they got to Michael’s house. Luke loved playing video games though so he could do this all night if Calum wanted to. They were starting a new level so the game began to load and they both took a breather as they set their controllers down on their laps.

“I’m worried about Michael” Luke suddenly said and Calum gave him a puzzled look “After Ash came back from talking to those guys from Florida State Michael seemed really off. I don’t know what it is. Plus whenever he goes to parties he always gets really drunk. I just hope nothing happens to him” Luke was chewing on his nails and he hated being so stressed out about it but he just couldn’t help it.

“Ash will watch out for him” Calum said honestly and Luke nodded. He knew how protective Ashton was of him and Calum so he knows that he would be like that with Michael too.

“Yeah…you’re right” Luke managed to smile but he still felt a little nervous.

“He’ll be fine. I know he will” Calum said softly as he leaned his head against Luke’s shoulder. Luke leaned his head down on top of Calum’s but then the game was starting again and Calum moved his head.

“Let’s watch a movie instead” Luke said pausing the game “I wanna snuggle” he pouted a bit and Calum giggled. Snuggling under a blanket while they watched a movie just seemed way better than video games.

They both decided on Big Daddy because it was one of their favorites then Luke was laying down on the couch and Calum got on the inside of the couch and laid himself over Luke’s chest. Luke instantly put an arm around him and started running his fingers through Calum’s hair “If you had to guess…what do you think Ash and Michael are doing right now?” and Calum smiled.

“Hmm…maybe sitting outside while Michael smokes and Ashton is drinking a beer”

“That actually sounds pretty accurate” Luke chuckled “I mean there’s no way that they’re already drunk”


	46. Ashton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long Mashton chapter (like 5k) and this is the chapter that I've been looking forward to showing you guys. You'll see a whole new side of Michael and it's cute as fuck.

“Michael! Michael! Michael!” everyone chanted around them as at least 50 people stood in the large kitchen. Ashton stared in awe as Michael put down his 4th Firebomb. If he kept drinking shots like this then Ashton knew he would have to take care of him by the end of the night. Ashton was slightly buzzed to the point where he just couldn’t stop laughing at everything but he knew he wouldn’t be getting wasted like Michael was. He wasn’t sure if Michael always drank like this at parties or if he was just being like this tonight which worried him a bit. He hoped that something wasn’t wrong with Michael that he was unaware of.

Michael took his last shot, thankfully, and then Ashton rested against the counter away from everyone else as he seen Michael talking with one of the guys from his team. They were both laughing and Ashton felt himself getting a bit jealous. He just wanted Michael all to himself.

The music in the living room seemed to get louder as people started to shuffle out of the kitchen and then Michael was taking a double look at Ashton and softly smiling at him before he went back to talking to the guy in front of him. Ashton finally couldn’t take it any longer and decided to walk over there.

“Hey! Ash!” Troy practically yelled in his ear “You know Michael, right?” and Ashton looked at Michael and smirked.

“A lot better than you do” Ashton said only for Michael to hear and the look on Michael’s face turned into a more desperate one as he bit at his lip.

“What?” Troy said, of course not hearing him, and then something else was stealing his attention away and he was walking out of the kitchen.

“I need…” Michael took a step and then quickly put his hand on the counter to hold himself up “I need a cigarette…come with me” Ashton could see how drunk Michael really was now so there was no way he was letting the boy out of his sight. He nodded and left his empty beer bottle on the counter before grabbing another.

Michael was leading the way as they walked through the crowded living room and he was surprised when Michael started walking up the stairs towards the balcony instead of the door to outside but he didn’t question it. There were a few kids that were leaning against the balcony that Michael patted on the back and they acted like they wanted to start a conversation with him but Michael just walked right past them.

They were starting to go down one of the dark hallways and this house was one that Ashton hadn’t ever been to so he had no clue where they were going. Suddenly they were stopping at a door and Michael leaned his forehead against it as he looked down and dug his hand in his jean pocket. He was unlocking the door quicker than Ashton expected since he seemed to be even struggling with even doing something as simple as walking.

They were stepping inside and right away Ashton could tell it was the master bedroom. He shut the door behind him then decided to lock it. The only light on in the room was a small lamp on the end table and Ashton walked over to the window that had wine red curtains. He looked out it and could see the cover over the outdoor pool as kids sat around on the lawn and a few other kids were running around and tackling each other.

“Fuck” Michael mumbled behind him and Ashton turned to see the bathroom door open as Michael sat on the edge of the large bathtub and seemed to be struggling with his lighter in his hand as he held a cigarette between his lips. Ashton chuckled and could still feel the vibration of the bass under his feet as he walked over to the boy. Without a word Ashton grabbed the lighter from him and lit the boys’ cigarette for him before Michael was glancing up at him through lazy eyes and then stuffing the lighter back in his pocket as he blew smoke into the air.

“So how do you have a key to this room?” Ashton crossed his arms over his chest before leaning against the counter, still close to Michael.

“Freshman year” Michael took another hit of the cigarette then let out a breath “I met this girl here who dated the guy who owns this house and she knew where he hid the key so we came up here and you know….” Michael looked ashamed as he talked about it as he started messing with a string on his ripped pair of black jeans “Guess he just never moved the key”

“How many people have you been with before, Luke?” it was too personal of a question and as soon as Ashton asked it he regretted it. Michael raised his eyebrows a bit and did a half smile “I’m-I’m sorry. It’s none of my business”

“It’s alright” Michael blinked his eyes but kept them shut for a couple seconds “I think about three. I only slept with them to get my mind off Luke for a little while…It never fucking worked though cause I’d always go straight back to thinking about him right after” Ashton could see how clearly Michael was remembering what it was like to not be able to have Luke and he knew that feeling all too well.

“You’ve got him now though. He’s fucking crazy about you” Ashton took another couple swigs of his beer, knowing he would need the extra alcohol if this conversation got any more serious. He just didn’t like seeing Michael so hurt. Michael hummed a bit as he still looked down at the tile flooring but Ashton swore he seen him smile a bit.

“What about you though? How many people have you been with? Cause you can’t expect me to believe that that was your first time sucking dick” and Michael’s drunkness was starting to come into play.

“Well it was” Ashton laughed and glanced away for a moment “I’ve only ever been with Piper…I mean I had some girlfriend in middle school but we didn’t go any further than like kissing” Michael was smiling and shaking his head like he still didn’t fully believe him but then he was flicking his cigarette into the toilet and putting another one between his lips. He was able to light it this time then he was standing up and Ashton was unsure of what he was doing. Michael was then stepping into the large round shaped tub and sitting down in it.

“You know…usually people sit in tubs only when they have water in them” Ashton let out a laugh.

“Shit…you’re right” Michael spoke seriously and then he was taking off his shirt and pants without warning and Ashton just sat there and roamed his eyes up and down his body. Michael was standing up, still in his boxers, as he got out and started filling up the tub. Ashton still watched him as he walked over to one of the closets “I want a bubble bath. I’ve never had a bubble bath before” and Ashton had to admit that he hadn’t before either. Hell, he couldn’t even remember the last time he had a bath and he sort of started to miss them. Michael hadn’t exactly asked him if he wanted to join him though so he would keep his mouth shut unless he did “Aha!” Michael said smiling wide and taking out a pink bottle and opening the lid “It smells like flowers” and Ashton let out a tiny laugh, he didn’t want Michael to think that he was making fun of him, cause he wasn’t, but he just thought this version of drunk Michael was so cute. He didn’t ever picture Michael being like this when he was drunk. Michael ended up pouring like half of the bottle into the now half full tub of water.

“You trying to drown yourself in bubbles?” Ashton was still smiling and doesn’t think he’s stopped since Michael got this idea to take a bath.

“Sounds like a good way to go” Michael started to put both of his hands through his hair as his back was still turned to Ashton and Ashton really missed kissing him. Ashton reached out and put one hand on his stomach as he made Michael get closer to him so that his back was pressed right up against Ashton’s chest. Ashton kept one hand on his stomach and then wrapped his other arm around his upper torso as he started to put kisses up and down the boys’ shoulder and back. Ashton was just letting his lips linger on the skin between Michael’s shoulder blades when the boy spoke softly.

“Are you gonna have a bubble bath with me?” Michael sounded so much younger when he spoke and Ashton smiled into his skin as he rubbed a hand up his stomach.

“I’d love to” Ashton rubbed his face against this shoulder and closed his eyes, all of a sudden feeling so sleepy.  
When the tub was all the way filled up Michael looked so excited as he slipped off his boxers and got into the warm water. The tub was so big that it could fit at least 3 people but Ashton knew he would want to be as close to Michael as possible. He smiled fondly at the boy when he patted the water, wanting Ashton to get in.

Ashton started to strip down and then he was crawling into the bath and instantly getting on his knees, hovering over Michael, as he used put his hands on the back of the bath to hold himself up. Michael was almost shyly looking up at him and then Ashton was leaning forward to kiss him softly. Michael hummed at the feeling as he started rubbing his hands up and down Ashton’s torso, just needing to touch him.

They kissed for a little while longer until they were heavily breathing and Michael was pushing Ashton back a bit. Ashton looked at him with a concerned face and Michael just smiled to assure to him that nothing was wrong.

“Sit back” Michael said and then Ashton was laying his back against the opposite side of the bath tub. Michael was then crawling over to him and sitting in between his legs with his back to Ashton’s chest. Ashton closed his eyes and couldn’t wipe the smile off his face at how cute this whole situation was. He wrapped one arm around Michael’s upper chest and the other around his lower stomach as he couldn’t stop trailing his fingers on his skin. Ashton kept his eyes closed as he held Michael tighter and kissed the side of his hair. He felt Michael reach one hand up to start trailing his fingers across his arm and even that simple touch had Ashton getting goosebumps. He let out a quiet moan, but not in a sexual way, as he rubbed his face in Michael’s hair.

He started to realize that this is all the things he’s been missing out on; this is how real and healthy relationships’ were supposed to be and Ashton started to hate himself for wasting so much time with Piper. This whole situation was so perfect and Ashton started to feel his eyelids getting heavy as Michael’s gentle touch was just about putting him to sleep. All the times before this it had been so rough and eager whenever he was with Michael so all of this was very new to him but he loved it. He loved just holding Michael like this and started to get scared that Michael would only want to be like this whenever he was drunk. That though actually had Ashton feeling a bit sick; was all of this happening only because Michael had a lot of alcohol in his system? Ashton started putting kisses on the side of Michael’s face and rubbed his hand up and down his chest as he could see Michael starting to close his eyes.

“I don’t know when I’m gonna have you like this again” Ashton mumbled into Michael’s cheek and it had Michael opening his eyes and moving his head away from Ashton’s face just so he could look at him.

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t ever get to cuddle you like this…I only get to cuddle with Luke and Calum like this” Michael’s face fell a bit and he looked down at the water as he started to cup some of the bubbles in his hand.

“I didn’t know that you wanted to be like this with me” Michael mumbled so quietly that Ashton almost didn’t catch what he said.

“What?” Ashton whispered just because he couldn’t get his voice to go any louder with how sad he felt right now “Why would you think that?” Michael just sadly shrugged as he continued to not make eye contact with Ashton so Ashton softly moved Michael closer to him again so he could kiss him on the cheek. He kept softly kissing him on his face until the boy was talking again.

“I just thought that you liked being all cute and cuddly with Luke and Calum and then you liked being able to be all rough with me…I just didn’t think you seen me like you see Calum and Luke” Michael was letting out a breath then closing his eyes “That doesn’t even make any sense…”

“Well…do you like when I’m rough with you cause I won’t be if you don’t like it. I just thought you did and-“

“No…Ash” Michael leaned his forehead against Ashton’s cheek “I do like when you’re rough with me but I like this too…I just didn’t think that you wanted like…this version of me” Michael was shaking his head again like he didn’t know what he was saying and Ashton held him tight as he turned Michael’s head so he could kiss him on his lips.

“Well I do” Ashton whispered against his lips “I love holding you like this and I was actually really scared that this would only be a onetime thing. I thought you only got cuddly like this when you’re drunk”

“No” Michael softly laughed “I always want this”

“So I can cuddle and take baths with you like this anytime I want?” Ashton smiled and Michael nodded as he let his head fall in the crook of his neck “No take backs?”

“No take backs” Michael giggled into his skin. Ashton started picking up handfuls of bubbles and then running the suds through Michael’s hair as the boy started to close his eyes again and Ashton thinks’ he would die from being so overwhelmingly fond if the boy actually fell asleep in his arms like this.

*

Neither of them had spoken a word for at least 15 minutes now. Ashton just continued to run his hands all over the boys’ body and was actually convinced that Michael could be asleep with how still he’s been.

“Are you okay though?” Michael spoke quietly as he moved his head so he could look up at Ashton.

“Yeah” Ashton chuckled a bit as he ran a hand through Michael’s hair “Why do you ask?”

“Well…it’s just that tonight was your last game ever as a highs school student. Aren’t you gonna miss it?” and Ashton let his eyes linger away from Michael for a few seconds. He really hadn’t even thought about that.

“Yeah...I’ll miss it but I feel like college is going to be so much better you know?” and Michael looked away from him as he swallowed hard.

“So Florida State huh?” he didn’t seem mad but he didn’t exactly seem excited either and Ashton wished he knew was what wrong.

“Maybe…I don’t even know if I’m getting in yet”

“I’ll really miss you if you do go” Michael mumbled as he started to sit up and he was acting like he wanted to get out. Ashton felt his heart breaking at seeing how sad Michael really was and now he knew what was wrong.

“Hey” Ashton said softly as he started rubbing his hand up Michael’s back but Michael still didn’t look back at him or move back to lean against him “I don’t even know if I’ll go there, Michael” Michael just nodded and then he was thankfully turning to look at Michael.

“Do you wanna get out?”

“Not really” Ashton said honestly “but I’m gonna end up falling asleep in here if we don’t” Michael managed to give him a smile and then he was stepping out. Ashton stayed in the warm water a few more seconds before he was getting out as well.

After they both were in their boxers again they stepped out into the bedroom and then Michael was immediately falling onto his back on the king size bed as his feet were still touching the floor. Ashton chuckled as he started to already close his eyes, not even properly lying in the bed, and he walked over to the boy and started to run his hands up and down his thighs in a soothing way. Ashton was just about to help the boy get more into bed and lay next to him but then Michael was getting a bit of a smirk on his face as he sat up on his elbows.

“Are you gonna fuck me Ash?” and Ashton widened his eyes a bit. He hadn’t originally planned on doing anything of that sort but now that it was brought up he really wanted to.

“Ummm” Ashton struggled with his words a bit “What happened to the innocent and cuddly Michael back there in the bath?” Ashton said pointing a thumb towards the bathroom.

“He’s long gone” Michael said with a serious face and Ashton gulped a bit. He had never done anything more with a guy other than handjobs and blowjobs. Not to mention that he was even new at doing those things. He knew he wouldn’t have a clue on how to fuck a guy and he was actually feeling really nervous “Hey” Michael’s soft voice said as he sat up and placed both hands on Ashton’s thighs “You don’t have to…I just thought…” he didn’t finished his sentence and instead just shrugged.

“No, I really want to…I’ve just never been with a guy like that before. I wouldn’t wanna like mess up and hurt you or something”

“I trust you but…I don’t want to make you do anything you aren’t comfortable with. We don’t have to do anything…I mean unless you-“Michael started to bite at his lip and let his hands fall from Ashton’s thighs.

“Unless what?” Ashton practically begged Michael to say what he was planning on saying.

“Would you let me fuck you?” Michael still seemed extremely nervous but Ashton felt his heart speeding up and he just really wanted Michael to be touching him again.

“Y-yeah” was all that Ashton managed to get out as he nodded.

“Yeah? You sure?”

“I’m sure” Ashton tried to sound less nervous this time. He really wanted this but he just wasn’t sure what to expect. Michael smiled wide then he was rolling over to the other side of the bed as he started to dig through the end table drawer. Ashton decided that he should probably lay down so he got in the middle of the bed and relaxed against the pillow.

“Jesus Christ” Michael all of a sudden laughed out and Ashton looked over at him “David’s parents are kinky as fuck. What is that?” Michael said bending down to get closer to the drawer but then he just made a grossed out face. Finally he was throwing a small bottle and then a condom on the bed and getting in between Ashton’s legs as he looked up at him “You good?” and Ashton eagerly nodded. He just really wanted Michael to be touch him.

Ashton was fine while Michael was pulling down his boxers because this is something that they had done before so he let out a breath, feeling more relaxed. He watched Michael bend down so that he was on his stomach now and he started just gently sucking and licking his tongue up Ashton’s balls. Ashton gripped hard at the sheets and moaned out loudly right away. It was when Michael’s lips started to trail down lower that he started to get nervous again.

“What-what’re you doing?” Ashton just had to ask and Michael looked up at him but still kept his head down low.

“It feels really good…trust me. If you don’t like it I’ll stop” Ashton licked his lips and felt himself nodding at the boys’ words. He trusted Michael. Michael smiled then he was sucking Ashton’s balls in between his lips again and beginning to slowly move lower. He could then feel Michael’s flat tongue swipe up his hole a few times and he was tensing up again. Michael wrapped both hands around Ashton’s thighs and gave one of them soft kiss before he went back to licking at Ashton’s rim.

Suddenly he was sticking his tongue inside and without being able to even control what he did Ashton let out a desperate moan then pushed his head back into the pillow. When Michael started to get a face pace going with his tongue Ashton already felt so close to coming and he didn’t want to come this soon but he also didn’t want Michael to stop because it just felt so good. It was a totally different feeling and Ashton was loving it.

“Holy shit, Michael” Ashton moaned out again and he clenched his eyes shut. He felt Michael smile against his hole then the boy was looking up at him as he started to kiss at his thighs.

“Feels good huh?”

“So fucking good” Ashton said as he was heavily breathing and putting a hand through his hair. Michael looked to the small tube on the bed and then he was sitting up again.

“I’m gonna prep you okay?” Michael said opening the bottle up and Ashton felt himself getting nervous again but he nodded “I’ll go really slow though” Ashton bit at his lip but nodded again. He watched as Michael put the lube on his pointer finger then he was bringing down to Ashton’s hole. He just started to rub around the rim a few times and it was a nice feeling but Ashton knew that something was about to come next. He shut his eyes as he felt Michael pushing the finger in but opened them when he realized it wasn’t as bad as he thought. He let out a breath and just trusted Michael with this as Michael continued to go in and out with his finger.

By the time Michael had three fingers going steadily in and out f him Ashton was a whimpering mess and was almost close to coming again like he had been when Michael was using his tongue on him. Even just Michael’s fingers felt amazing and he couldn’t even imagine how good he would feel when Michael started properly fucking him.

Michael leaned up to start licking strips up Ashton’s dick as he sped up his fingers even more. The two feelings just felt so amazing and they were about to send Ashton over the edge as he bit his lip so hard that he was sure it would start bleeding “Mi- fuck, Michael you gotta stop. I’m so close” Ashton whined when he couldn’t take it anymore. He could already feel the pleasure building up in his stomach.

Michael slowly retracted his fingers then he was rubbing the rim with his thumb as he gave Ashton’s dick one more lick and Ashton let out another moan. He watched Michael’s every move as he started to put the condom on then he was lubing himself up before getting in between Ashton’s legs again.

“You good?” Michael said as he lined himself up and Ashton was so desperate for it.

“Yeah…” He panted as he closed his eyes “Please” and Michael let out a small moan which confused Ashton because he hadn’t even moved yet. Michael was then putting his hands on the bed and leaning down to get right above Ashton’s face before giving him a slow but intense kiss as he rubbing his tongue against the roof of Ashton’s mouth.

“I love hearing you beg” Michael said against his lips and Ashton actually shivered by how turned on he was. Ashton put a hand at the back of Michael’s head and brought him into a more intense kiss than before as he bit at Michael’s lips a bit.

“Please fuck me” Ashton chuckled a bit when Michael rolled his eyes back in his head as he licked his lips. Michael was then smirking at him and getting back on his knees as he just rubbed the tip of his dick at Ashton’s entrance “Stop being such a fucking tease” Ashton whined and Michael raised his eyebrows before started to push in. Ashton was taking a deep breath in when Michael started to go even further in and he clenched his eyes shut once Michael had bottomed out “Shit” he breathed out while he kept his eyes closed and brought his hands down to start rubbing up Michael’s thighs.

“I know” Michael said because he knew exactly how Ashton was feeling right now and knew how full he felt. Michael started to slowly pump a hand on his dick to try and ease the pain then he was bending down again and starting to suck harsh marks on Ashton’s neck. He was doing that to distract the both of them because he knew Ashton was in pain and he also had to stop himself from thrusting in. The pleasure from just having Ashton clench around him was unbearable. Ashton moved one hand to start rubbing up Michael’s back, knowing that he wanted to move then Ashton was nodding.

“Okay…you can move” Michael let out a breath at hearing that then sat up straight again and pulled out and slowly went back in. Michael started to speed up his pace when Ashton kept cursing and breathing heavily and then Michael started to rub a hand up and down Ashton’s stomach as he did slow and hard thrusts.

“God, you feel so fucking good” Michael moaned out and started to pump a hand on Ashton’s dick again. Michael couldn’t help but lean down and lean on his elbows as he started to kiss Ashton fiercely and still kept thrusting hard into him. The new position had Ashton crying out when Michael hit a spot that sent pleasure go all through his body and it had him shaking afterwards.

“Fuck…oh fuck!” Ashton moaned out when Michael kept hitting the spot over and over. Michael slowed down a bit as he breathed heavily into Ashton’s neck and kept sucking bruises all over it “Michael” was all that Ashton could whimper and Michael knew he was close. He sat up again and went back to slamming into him in a fast past as he sped up his hand on Ashton’s dick and he watched as Ashton rolled his eyes back and his mouth fell open as he came all over his stomach.

Michael thought it was the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen and he was hitting his orgasm only a few second later. His hips stuttered a few times before he was pulling out of Ashton slowly and then collapsing on him. Ashton instantly wrapped both arms around Michael and kept peppering kisses on the side of his head. Michael let out a breath then Ashton could feel him smiling against his chest.

“That was so fucking good” Michael whispered against his skin, like he was too tired to speak any louder. Michael was suddenly sitting up and looking at Ashton and Ashton rubbed his fingers against one of his cheeks “Was it good for you?” and Michael seemed so worried that he Ashton didn’t like it and it made Ashton chuckle and shake his head.

“Are you kidding me? If I wasn’t so fucking exhausted I’d want to do it again”

“Me too” Michael smiled then he was letting his head fall on Ashton’s chest again. They were both still breathing heavily and Ashton started to rub one hand in Michael’s hair as he used the other to trail fingers up his back. Ashton started to almost massage at Michael’s scalp and Michael was letting out a content sigh as he kissed Ashton’s chest a few times.

“That feels good” Michael said said in a sleepy voice “I’m gonna fall asleep soon if you keep doing that” and he was just warning Ashton that he could pass out at any second.

“You can sleep” Ashton said as he closed his eyes and put another kiss to Michael’s head.

“Wanna talk to you though” Michael mumbled and Ashton could tell by his voice that he was just getting more tired by the second.

“Talk to me about what?” Ashton was worried that Michael wanted to talk about a specific topic that was bothering him.

“Just…talk” Michael let out another content sigh when Ashton moved the hand that was on his back to start rubbing up his arm “I like talking to you….and I like this right here; like you holding me…makes me feel like nothing bad will ever happen if I just stay like this” Ashton didn’t know why but he felt his eyes beginning to swell up with tears and clenched them shut to make sure he didn’t cry. He couldn’t cry just because of Michael saying all these sweet things to him. He wouldn’t let himself. Michael’s words were just so caring and sincere and it was making him feel so loved; it was a feeling he’s never felt so strongly before. Ashton held him tighter and leaned his head against the boys’.

“You can keep talking then” Ashton said softly “I’ll be listening” Michael hummed against his skin, seeming like he was thinking of what to say.

“What’re you doing for Christmas break?”

“Nothing” Ashton yawned “My family isn’t too big on Christmas”

“Are you guys satanists?” Michael asked seriously but Ashton laughed and shook his head.

“No. I don’t know…My mom will get us a few things but we haven’t really celebrated it properly since-“and Ashton stopped himself. He hadn’t told any of the boys’ about the situation with his dad and he didn’t want to make this conversation too serious.

“Since when?” Michael sat up a bit so he could look at Ashton. He looked worried and Ashton didn’t want him to worry.

“Just umm…” Ashton swallowed hard and had to look away for a few seconds to come up with a different answer than what he was thinking of “We just haven’t celebrated it since I was young. I don’t know why” Which was a lie. He knew exactly why they didn’t celebrate it but he just really didn’t want to bother Michael with his problems.

“Well…” Michael looked down and started to trace his fingers on Ashton’s chest “You can stay with me during Christmas…I mean if you want” and Ashton felt himself smiling. He was feeling sad before when he started to think about his dad but now all of that was gone.

“Really? Your parents wouldn’t mind?”

“Hell no” Michael smiled “I’d love it if you stayed”

“Okay…” Ashton bit at his lip and nodded “I can’t wait” Michael smiled again and leaned forward to start kissing the boy again; they were soft and lazy kisses but Ashton never wanted them to end. Michael laid his head back on Ashton’s chest and Ashton continued to massage his hands in Michael’s hair again.

They continued talking for what seemed like hours and Ashton felt so at peace. They spoke until he could feel Michael’s eyelashes start to flutter on his skin and then Michael was placing lazy kisses on his chest until he let out a breath and got higher up on Ashton’s chest so he could burrow into his neck.

“Night, Ash” he smiled and Ashton never stilled his hands in his hair.

“Goodnight, Michael”


	47. Calum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah I'm already adding another chapter because I love this Cake chapter (The other pairings are involved as well)  
> Follow me on [tumblr](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/) if you want!

“Well what color do you think I should pick?” Luke looked up him with his pretty blue eyes and Calum bit at his lip before looking back down at the small box as he started to dig through it. He seen a peach colored nail polish that he loved but this was for Luke, not him. Calum dug through it more and spotted a light blue color that was freakishly close to Luke’s eye color.

“What about this one?” Calum said holding it up so Luke could see and Luke was immediately smiling as he nodded. He seemed so excited about this and Calum loved that he was letting him do this.

It was the next morning and it had started when Luke was holding Calum’s hand as they laid in bed and he noticed the lilac colored polish on Calum’s fingernails. Luke insisted that Calum paint his nails for him and Calum was feeling just as excited as him.  
Calum grabbed Luke’s hand softly and put it on his lap, and he was reminded of Ashton doing this same thing for him back when all of this was just beginning, then he was starting to paint the first nail.

“Wanna know a secret?” Luke suddenly said once Calum was finishing his first hand and Calum looked up and smiled. He loved hearing more about the boy’s.

“Yeah” Calum nodded and Luke bit his lip as he looked down at his nails. He seemed nervous so Calum started painting on his other hand.

“You were my first like…real crush” Luke finally said and that had Calum stopping what he was doing to look up at the boy. Calum never heard anyone tell him that and he was so flattered. To know that he was Luke’s first crush was just the cutest thing he’s ever heard.

“I was?” Calum spoke quietly and he still couldn’t believe what he just heard. Luke nodded while still looking at him and Calum started to rub his thumb against Luke’s hand just wanting to hold hands with him again but he couldn’t exactly do that when he was supposed to be painting his nails.

“Do you remember when we had art class together in middle school?” and Calum usually didn’t remember things when they didn’t involve Michael but he felt himself remembering Luke. He used to have glasses back then and Calum remembers how he would always wear this blue snapback. Calum doesn’t think that they every spoke but he would always feel Luke looking at him. He never would have thought that Luke was looking at because he liked him though.

“You had glasses back then” Calum smiled and he seen Luke’s face light right up.

“Yeah…yeah I did”

“I remember you always looking at me” and Calum seen Luke start to blush as he looked down to his painted nails “But I never would have thought that you actually liked me”

“Cal…” Luke shook his head and Calum stopped painting his nails to entirely focus on him. He could tell that Luke was struggling with saying something “I was so crazy about you…I still am” and now it was Calum’s turn to start blushing “I was so shit at anything to do with art and I remember being so amazed by everything you did. Do you remember how at the end of each week we had to vote on who had the best art project?” and Calum nodded quickly, wanting to know where Luke was going with this “Yeah well I always voted for yours no matter what…halfly because you just deserved to win cause you have an amazing talent and halfly because I was hoping you would notice how I always voted for you” and Calum was without words with how shocked he was and just at realizing how much Luke really liked him.

“I’m uh…” Calum swallowed and looked down for a few seconds “I’m sorry I never noticed, Luke. I never would have imaged that someone like you would actually like me” Calum took a deep breath and let it out “I still don’t get it…I don’t get why Ashton and Michael like me either” he said honestly and he had never admitted such a thing to someone; he had never opened up to anyone about how lowly he felt about himself. He could feel Luke looking down at him and he swore he seen his lip quiver but he couldn’t look up after admitting such a thing.

“Calum” Luke’s voice was shaking and now Calum felt even more shitty about what he said because it was making Luke sad. He suddenly felt Luke’s fingers under his chin as he made him look up and now Calum could see Luke’s eyes glossy and a tear ran down his cheek. Calum reached out and wiped it away with his thumb then Luke was closing his eyes and leaning his face into the touch “You are literally the sweetest person I’ve ever met…I just wish you could see how special you are and it’s so rare to find someone who is just beautiful inside and out in every way and that’s you” Calum felt like he was going to start crying at any moment “You know how much I care about you” Luke chuckled “And I know Michael isn’t always good at showing how he feels about people but you mean so much to him…I can see it just in the way he looks at you and Ashton..fuck” Luke let out another laugh as he closed his eyes “You are literally Ashton’s entire world. You’re so important to all of us and you’re so fucking incredible so please…don’t think anything less of yourself” Calum swallowed hard and looked down as soon as he felt a tear hitting his cheek. He hated people seeing him cry but Luke’s words just hit him so hard. Luke was then cupping his cheek and then he felt Luke’s soft lips against his other cheek. Calum looked up and then Luke was facing him again. He didn’t even feel like there were enough words to thank Luke for what he had just said but Calum needed to show Luke how much those words meant to him.

He tried to build up some courage then he was flicking his eyes down to Luke’s lips; that gave him more confidence because he just wanted to kiss the boy so badly. Luke was then swallowing hard and Calum just went for it. He leaned in fast but as soon as he touched Luke’s lips he just started to slowly move his lips against the boys’. Luke was taking a deep breath then kissing him back just as slow and softly. He felt Luke’s hand on his cheek again and then his hand was slowly moving towards the back of his hair and Calum could feel the shivers going through his body.

It was so much different than kissing Ashton but he somehow felt that exact same feeling go thorugh his body that he did when he kissed Ashton. He wasn’t sure exactly what the feeling was but all he knew was that it made him feel so safe and cared for. He felt like no one could ever hurt him again. Calum reached out and rubbed at Luke’s sides when he started kissing him a bit faster and Luke was letting out a small whimper as he started to kiss the boy more fiercely as well.

Once they came back for air they were just sitting there with their eyes closed as they leaned their foreheads together then Luke leaned forward kiss him again and Calum could feel him smiling as he did. Luke made a “mmm” sound against his lips then he was moving his head to burrow it in Calum’s neck and Calum wrapped both arms around his torso.

“You mean so m-much to me, Cal” and Calum knew Luke was crying so he held him tighter and kissed the side of his head.

“You mean so much to me too, Luke” and Calum meant that with all his heart. They stayed sitting like that until they were both feeling like they were going to fall asleep then they were laying down and Calum rested his head on Luke’s chest. Suddenly Calum looked down and remembered that he was painting Luke’s nails when he looked at the two nails that didn’t have paint on them “Maybe I should finish painting your nails” Calum giggled then Luke was laughing too.

“Oh…yeah. You probably should” Calum was then sitting up and grabbed the nail polish and Luke stayed laying down as Calum finished the last two nails. He inspected them once he was done and then he was pressing kiss to Luke’s fingers and he could see Luke smiled wide as his cheeks got red “I love them, Cal. Thank you”

“You’re welcome” Calum bit at his lip as he was still holding Luke’s hand.

“Come here” Luke said softly and then Calum was laying on his chest again. He had already missed it.

*

When Calum woke up again, he hadn’t remembered dozing off but he remembered being in Luke’s arms, he could still feel Luke’s arms around him but now there was another solid body on him but he was still half asleep so he didn’t open his eyes yet.

“Michael you’re crushing them” a voice said in a dull tone and Calum knew that voice anywhere. He smiled before opening his eyes to see Michael laying over top of him and Luke seemed to be still fast asleep. Calum looked over Michael to see Ashton leaning against the doorway in a black hoody and black skinny jeans. Ashton did a crooked smile and winked at the boy and Calum just wanted the Ashton to be way closer to him.

“This bed is awfully lumpy” Michal said moving a bit and it caused Calum to giggle. He couldn’t help but reach out and start running his fingers up Michael’s back. Michael was instantly turning his head to look at Calum as he had his head on Luke’s chest then Michael was changing positions so that he squeezing in between them.

“Did you guys have fun last night?” Michael asked and he was close that Calum could feel his heartbeat speeding up. Michael’s green eyes were pouring into him and Calum was feeling brave again as he leaned forward and leaned his head against the side of Michael’s. Michael let out a chuckle and Calum swore he was going to cry when he felt Michael wrap an arm around him and press a kiss to his cheek. Calum realized that he still didn’t answer Michael’s question and he just nodded, still feeling tired from his nap.

“Alright” Ashton suddenly said, sounding irritated then the curly haired boy was walking over to the bed and draping himself across Calum “There’s too much cuddling going on without me” Calum couldn’t help but instantly cuddle into Ashton while he still kept his arm over Michael’s chest. Ashton started too press messy kisses all over Calum’s face and that always made Calum giggle from it tickling so much.

“I missed you” Calum said softly against Ashton’s hair and the boy leaned up to face him and kissed Calum on the nose then lips.

“Mmm” Ashton hummed against his lips “I missed you too pup”

“Hey” Michael said sadly then Calum looked over to see the boy pouting as he looked between him and Ashton “Didn’t you miss me?” Michael said to Calum and Calum smiled before leaning forward a bit and kissed Michael on the cheek, very closely to his lips.

“Of course I missed you” Calum smiled sweetly and it seemed to be good enough for Michael because he smiled back then he was pressing a hesitant kiss to his lips. Calum felt his eyes widen a bit when Michael back up because holy shit…this is the first time Michael has kissed him. Calum really wanted him to kiss him again. Calum shyly smiled but looked down to Michael’s lips, hoping he would get the message. Luckily he did and Michael pecked Calum’s lips a few more times. Ashton still had his face in Calum’s neck and Calum swore he was asleep.

They started to get more into the kiss and Calum started to breathe heavy with how good Michael’s lips felt against his; he’s waited so long for this. He felt Ashton’s head leaving his neck and then Calum knew his eyes were on them.

“Wake Luke up” and Calum and Michael both looked up to see him pouting now “I need someone to kiss too” Michael and Calum were both giggling then Michael was leaning forward to kiss his cheek then his lips. Calum didn’t know if he should be worried or not but seeing them kiss wasn’t even weird to him and the fact that he had just been kissing Luke before this wasn’t weird either. He was just really adapting to this whole relationship all four of them had and he couldn’t believe how happy he was with these boy’s. He felt Michael placing a kiss to his neck before laying down on his chest and then Ashton was cuddling into him as well.

“Michael?” came a sleepy voice behind Michael and they all looked to see Luke beginning to sit up a bit as he looked at them with tired eyes and rubbed at his messy hair.

“Yeah baby?” Michael turned a bit to kiss Luke’s lips and Luke just rubbed at his eyes “Come here” Michael was then laying back down on Calum’s chest and draping Luke’s arm over him before Luke was laying down again and pressing his chest to Michael’s back. Calum watched as Michael immediately closed his eyes once Luke held him tighter and started pressing kisses to the back of his head then Ashton and Luke were both exchanging smiles.

“Look” Luke said sitting up a bit and putting his hand in front of Michael’s face “Cal painted my nails. Do you like them?” and Calum felt so proud because Luke seemed so happy to show them off to Michael. Michael was then taking Luke’s hand.

“They’re beautiful, baby” Michael said kissing his fingers “They match your eyes” and Calum smiled because that was exactly was he thought when he picked out the polish. Luke was then smiling wide and laying against him again “You did a good job, Cal” Michael said looking at the boy and then kissing him on the cheek and Calum feels like he would always start blushing whenever the boy’s would kiss him.

Calum started to drift off again when he felt a hand, that he knew was Ashton’s, go under his shirt and start gently trialing up and down his stomach and he hummed when he felt Michael putting kisses up his neck. The last thing Calum remembered before falling asleep was Michael pressing a kiss to his temple as Ashton still rubbed at his stomach.

*

When Calum woke up the second time it was dark out but there was light briefly shining in through the window from the streetlights outside. He wondered why he would just randomly wake up but then he felt Ashton flinch and it made Calum even jump himself. The curly haired boy was now laying his head lower on Calum’s stomach and Michael still had his head burrowed in his neck as he breathed heavily. It was so comforting to still have the boy’s cuddled up next to him and Calum started to close his eyes, starting to doze off again. Ashton was flinching again and Calum opened his eyes to see the boy rubbing his face on his stomach and making whimpering noises.

Ashton then made an even louder noise and Calum was about to reach out and try to comfort him once he figured out that Ashton was most likely having a bad dream but then Michael was taking his head out of his neck. Calum watched as Michael sat up and looked down at Ashton as the boy continued to make whimpering noises. Michael was then getting lower down on the bed so that he was closer to Ashton’s face then he was petting a hand over his hair. Calum couldn’t believe that Ashton stopped the whimpering as soon as Michael touched him and he also thought it was the cutest thing he’s ever seen.

Michael was then leaning down on his elbow and continued to softly pet a hand over Ashton’s hair as he started pecking kisses on his cheek and moved down to start kissing his neck. In a way Calum felt like he shouldn’t be even allowed to watch such an intimate and sweet moment between them but he just couldn’t take his eyes away from them. From this view Calum wasn’t sure but it seemed like Ashton was starting to wake up as he moved his head up and then Michael was facing him.

“Michael” Ashton said in a rough tone and Calum loved that voice of his so much.

“Yeah” Michael whispered and he moved the hand that was on Ashton’s hair to start trailing his fingers down his face “Were you having a bad dream?” and Calum felt Ashton nod a “yes” against his stomach. He felt so bad because he knew how terrifying bad dreams could be. Michael just leaned down to kiss his lips then his cheek and Calum felt Ashton’s eyelashes flutter on his skin as his eyes closed again.

Michael starting rubbing his hand on Ashton’s hair again then he was laying down so that his head was on Calum’s stomach as his face was right next to Ashton’s. Calum could feel them both smile against his skin then Michael was leaning in to give Ashton a kiss on the lips as he kept moving his hand on his hair. Ashton breathed out then it seemed like he was planning on going back to sleep once Michael stopped kissing him.

Calum had never been so in love with watching two people together like this and he knew he would watch them until they were fast asleep. There was just something different about the way Michael acted with Ashton and how he was when he was with Luke. Calum couldn’t put his finger on what it was but then his thoughts got lost when he saw Ashton sitting up then reaching at the back of his hoody to pull it off then he was doing the same with his t-shirt. Calum stared at his bareback and he wanted to reach out and touch it so bad.

Ashton was then turning and Calum quickly shut his eyes so Ashton didn’t know that he had just been watching him and Michael this whole time. He felt Ashton’s eyes on him through his eyelids. Ashton’s lips were then on his cheek and then they dragged down to put a few kisses on his jaw before Ashton was laying his head back on Calum’s stomach. Calum felt himself smile when he felt kisses on his stomach and then he could feel both of the boy’s holding him tighter before they were both saying night to each other. Calum knew from now that he wouldn’t be able to sleep alone ever again and feels so at peace and loved.


	48. Luke

“Luke get off that phone” Luke jumped at his mother’s harsh tone then he was looking up. He had been texting the boys for hours now and it turns out that having three boyfriends was taking up a lot of his time. He was perfectly okay with that though and wouldn’t want it any other way. The past few weeks they had all been staying at Michael’s almost every night and he hadn’t realized how much he depended on those boy’s to sleep until he had to sleep in his own bed last night. He tossed and turned for hours and he kept reaching his hand over thinking he was going to be able to touch someone next to him. Luke couldn’t believe how much he missed Michael’s lips against the back of his neck, how much he missed Ashton’s strong arms wrapped around him and how much he missed holding Calum tightly against his chest as he peppered kisses on his hair. He liked waking up and being able to reach out and touch them or kiss them whenever he wanted. It scared Luke how addicted he was to sleeping with those three boy’s but he didn’t know what he was going to do if he had to sleep without them again.

“Why?” Luke had to ask because it’s not like he was harming anyone by being on his phone.

“Because” he could tell his mom was about to use that same annoyed tone “You’ve been glued to it all morning, now put these dishes away for me” Luke sighed when he looked at the full tray of washed dishes.

“Why are you cleaning so much? Who’s coming over?” Luke knew that his mom was only this crazy about cleaning when they were having company and Luke prayed to God that he didn’t have to deal with any of his relatives.

“Jack is coming home actually” and now she had a happy tone to her voice.

“And why am I just now hearing about it?” Luke hated when he got left out of the loop like this.

“He only called a couple of hours ago, Luke and I’ve been busy cleaning…even If I would have mentioned it you probably wouldn’t have heard me anyways with how focused you’ve been on your phone” Luke rolled his eyes then began to wonder why she was doing all of this cleaning just for Jack.

“Is Ben coming home too?”

“No, just Jack but I invited a few of your aunts and uncles” and Luke let out a breath; it was just as he expected. A few really meant all of them and he was not looking forward to it. Suddenly he got an idea though.

“Can I invite a few friends?”

“Like who?” he mother looked confused and Luke realized that up until a few weeks ago he didn’t even have any friends.

“Just a few kids from school”

“Well why I haven’t I met them?”

“I’m newly…friends with them” Luke bit at his fingernail.

“Yeah…that’d be okay, Luke” and now Luke was smiling. As long as he had his boy’s with him then he knew this party would be a lot more bearable. He shot out a text to each one of the boy’s and then Michael said he would pick Michael up, while Ashton would have to come a bit later than 6 to because he had to pick up his sister from her dance lesson.

Luke practically skipped up the stairs to change out of his pajamas and started to dig through his closet. He finally found a black button up shirt, knowing that his mom always wanted him to dress up whenever family would come over. Luke was then pulling out a pair of light washed jeans and slipping the new clothes on. He looked in the mirror and his hair was still a bit damp from his shower this morning but he knew it would dry in no time.  
Luke layed on his bed and started to let his mind wonder to other things. He knew there was no way in hell he was telling anyone about the fact that he was dating three people so he just hoped that they wouldn’t show too much affection towards him in front of his family. He knew he wouldn’t have to worry about Ashton and Calum but Michael was just more touchy with him in public and Luke feels like he would have to tell them ahead of time to kind of lay off the PDA just so he wouldn’t end up shying away from them if they touched him or kissed him.

It wasn’t like Luke’s parents and brother weren’t aware of his sexuality, because they were, but it was just not a normal thing to be dating more than one person at once and Luke didn’t feel like dealing with explaining it tonight. He knew that would have to be explained another time and not when his brother was coming home for the first time in almost a year. He just didn’t want to take the attention away from Jack.

*

A couple hours later his house was filled with family and friends and Luke knew there would be way more people here than his mother led on. He was pushing through the crowd of people in the kitchen as he tried to get to the living room. The kitchen was packed full because all of the food had been set out and apparently everyone was starving. Luke didn’t care about eating just yet because it was a bit past 6 and he was just waiting for Michael and Calum to walk in. The living room only had a few people sitting on the couches and then Luke sat in the armchair that was by the big window so he could see when Michael pulled in. His brother wasn’t here yet either and Luke could see his mother getting a bit mad at his tardiness since this entire get together was for him. Luke really wasn’t surprised though because Jack was always late but he really hated that he was today because he was actually really looking forward to seeing him.

“Oh Lucas!” and Luke jumped sky high at the shrill voice as he gritted his teeth. He knew it was his Aunt Helen without even looking and he was really hoping he could avoid her “Where have you been hiding?” she was now right in above him and Luke took in her awful puke green sweater before looking up at her and forcing a smile.

“I haven’t been hiding” which was the biggest lie ever “I’ve just been sitting here”

“Well don’t I deserve a hug?” Luke had to hold his tongue in order to not say his honest answer. He sighed before standing up and she was immediately cutting off his air supply as she held him way too tight. Luke did a forced laugh and then he was trying to back away from her. She was so short that her head was at his chest and he could easily escape her grasp but he felt like she would throw a giant fit if he did.

“So…” Luke thought that if he started talking then she would let him go and luckily she did. She was backing up and Luke took advantage of being able finally breathe.

“So who is the lucky lady?” and Luke seen that one coming. Every time his aunt Helen seen him she would ask if he had a girlfriend but he wasn’t sure why she worded it that way. She worded it like she just knew that Luke had a girlfriend.

“Umm…I don’t have a girlfriend” Luke bit at his lip then looked out the window hoping to see Michael pull in so he could be saved from this situation but his jeep was still nowhere to be seen.

“Oh you don’t?” and Luke shook his head “Well your mom said you that you’ve been acting very happy lately and haven’t been home much so I just assumed you had a girl in your life” If Luke’s Aunt Helen wasn’t one of the most homophobic people he’s ever met then he would tell her straight up that there would never be a girl in his life because he was gay but he just really didn’t feel like being lectured about it. It wasn’t like his aunt even meant anything to him so Luke figured it wasn’t even necessary that she knew about his sexuality.

“Well there’s no girl” Luke could already feel himself starting to get upset as he looked away from her.

“Well you’ve got to get a girlfriend some time right?” and Luke swore that he wanted to jump out the window.

“I like to focus on my school work”

“Well I’m sure-“

“I gotta go to the bathroom” Luke suddenly said because he just couldn’t take it anymore and he seen the surprised look on his aunt’s face, usually he was very polite but he just couldn’t be like that this time and he could tell she was offended. He actually smiled once he walked past her then he was walking up the stairs. He walked up to the very top then he was sitting on the first step as he looked down at everyone. His brother was still nowhere in sight and he could see his mother in the kitchen with an apron around her waist as was bent over the stove. In the corner of the living room his dad was talking with a few of his uncles and Luke just wished that the boy’s would hurry up and get here already.

Suddenly his phone was vibrating and Luke never moved so fast in his life. He smiled wide and was skipping down the stairs when he seen that it was a text from Michael saying that they were here. He had to push past a few of his younger cousins on his way out the door but he didn’t even care. He opened the door and felt a chill when the cold air his skin. He looked to left to see Michael’s car jeep parked right in front of the garage as him and Calum stepped out of it. Since Michael was the closest to him Luke ran to him first as he wrapped his arms around his shoulders.

“Whoa” Michael let out a laugh and wrapped his arms around his “Hey…sorry we’re late. We wanted to get chocolate shakes” Calum was then coming closer and Luke took one arm off of Michael’s shoulders to bring Calum into the hug and he felt the boy melt into his side like he always did.

“I’m so happy you guys are here” Luke placed a kiss to Calum’s head then to Michael’s cheek “My aunt Helen, who I hate, was driving me nuts” Luke back up to let them breathe “Plus you guys will get to meet my brother”

“Is he here yet?”

“No…he’s late as always and Ash won’t be coming until later” Luke could see them both nodding then Michael was looking Luke up and down.

“You look great…I’ve never seen you so dressed up” Michael smirked then he was leaning forward and pressing a kiss to Luke’s cheek then his lips. Luke knew he was blushing and he looked over to see Calum smiling.

“Thank you” Luke mumbled, looking down at his feet “But about the PDA…” and Luke looked up to see Michael’s face falling, which made him want to just say “fuck my family, you can kiss me and touch me as much as you want” but another part of him knew that he would end up stressing out about it later on “It’s just that my family doesn’t know about you guys and It’s just a lot to explain. I’m not ashamed of you guys at all so please don’t think that but it’s just-“ Luke shrugged and didn’t know how else to explain himself.

“Luke I get it” Michael said softly and then he was lifting Luke’s chin up “It’s okay. I’ll tone the PDA way down tonight”

“Thank you for understanding” Luke still felt like shit but he was glad that he got that out of the way.

“Of course” Michael smiled then he was putting an arm around both him and Calum as he led them into the house. Michael let his arms fall before Luke opened the door and Luke already felt like he would be living a lie the whole time he was in there with them. These boy’s meant so much to him and he would have to act like they didn’t; he knew it would kill him and by the end of the night all he would want to do was kiss all of them until he couldn’t breathe. As they entered the house there was loud voices everywhere and there seemed to be even more people than before. His mom was then walking down the stairs on the phone and he heard her yell “Why aren’t you here yet?” so he knew she was on the phone with Jack.

“Do you guys want something to eat? I haven’t eaten yet either” Michael and Calum were both shrugging then Luke was leading them into the kitchen. Luke seen a few of his family members smiling at Michael and Calum and it made him happy. He just hoped that the boy’s could get to know some of his family members.  
After they all got plates of food they were sitting the surprisingly empty dining table. They weren’t alone for long though because Luke’s mom was making her way towards them with a smile.

“You must be Luke’s new friends. I’m Liz” she was wiping her hands on her apron then Michael and Calum were both shaking her hand.

“Mom this is Michael” Luke pointed to Michael who was right next to him then he pointed over to Calum “And this is Calum”

“Well it’s very nice to meet you boy’s and I’m sure Jack will be delighted to meet you too…” and Luke seen his mom start to look upset “That is if he ever gets here” she mumbled then she forced a smile before walking away from them.

“Ever since Jack’s 21st birthday she hates whenever he’s late because it makes her so nervous” Luke said shaking his head a bit and feeling a bit upset at his brother for putting her through this.

“Why? What happened at his 21st?” Michael said before swallowing his piece of chicken.

“On his 21st my mom threw him a big party just like this but he just never showed up. The next morning he walked into the house so hungover that he could barely even walk and then he puked all over our living room floor” and Luke could see Michael and Calum both holding back laughs “She never really forgave him for that”

“Do you think he’ll do that again?” Calum leaned over to look at Luke and Luke thought for a few seconds.

“Hopefully not” He smiled “I haven’t seen him in almost a year…he’s been off at college and he hasn’t visited in a while”

“He’ll show, Luke” Calum said and Luke wanted to lean forward and hold him so badly. Instead Luke just smiled and reached a hand over to ruffle his hair. He then felt Michael pat his thigh and he was going to take it away but Luke grabbed it and laced their fingers together. He couldn’t wait until he had these boy’s all to himself again because he missed kissing them and touching them so much.


	49. Ashton

Ashton was tapping his fingers on the steering wheel as he drove down Luke’s road and he was finally feeling better after not seeing any of the boy’s all day. It seemed like a very short period of time to go without someone but it felt so long to Ashton. He didn’t know if it was healthy with how much he needed Luke, Michel and Calum around but these past few weeks they had been spending time with each other constantly and it was becoming so natural to have them around so much. Ashton smiled to himself at the thought of seeing them and he really hoped they could all stay the night together tonight. Last night Luke’s mom had made him come home so they were short one person in Michael’s bed and it just didn’t feel right without Luke. But now that Christmas break had officially started Ashton knew that they would get to spend so much time together and he couldn’t’ wait.

Soon he was pulling to the side of the road in front of Luke’s house and he glanced at all the cars surrounding him. He knew it was a party but he never imaged so many people would be here. Ashton was turning off his car and going to open his car door when something caught his eye and he saw a black car pulling in an open parking spot ahead of him. He wondered how many more people were going to show up but then he was hurrying out of the car, knowing that the boy’s were probably waiting for him. Ashton locked his car then he was walking towards the driveway as he flattened out his plain black shirt, which was under a green colored jacket, and fixed the black snapback that was sitting backwards over his curls.

“It’s nice to see I’m not the only one who’s late” said a deep voice behind him and Ashton turned to see a tall and broad guy walking towards him with his hands in his leather jacket. Ashton smiled then slowed down a bit so the guy could walk next to him.

“Yeah…had to pick up my sister from dance lessons” and Ashton rolled his eyes remember how his sister talked on the phone loudly the whole way home “What’s your excuse?” and the guy was now walking right next to him.

“Don’t have one” the guy chuckled and looked right up at Ashton with his blue eyes and Ashton knew those eyes. The height, the broad shoulders….it was all becoming clear now.

“You’re Jack” Ashton smiled and the guy smiled back at him.

“That’s right” he nodded and Ashton reached out a hand for him to shake.

“I’m Ashton…I’m Luke’s b-“ Ashton froze then shook his head “I’m Luke’s friend”

“Oooooh” Jack smirked at him and Ashton knew that Jack was aware of what he almost let himself say “Well it’s nice to meet you, Ashton”

“Same” Ashton smiled and looked back to the ground as they were coming up to the front door.

“Good luck in there” Jack winked at him and then Ashton was widening his eyes and felt worried. He was actually feeling pretty confident before coming here because it wasn’t like any of them knew he was Luke’s boyfriend, one of them, so he wouldn’t have to hear the “new boyfriend speech” from any of them or have any blush worthy moments. Now that Jack was telling him good luck though he felt all that confidence going down the drain “I’m kidding” Jack laughed out and hit him on the shoulder. Ashton managed a smile then Jack was opening the door and instantly all the eyes in the room were pointing towards him.

“About time you showed up!” Ashton heard someone yell and Jack was just out stretching his arms and even from the side view Ashton could tell he was smiling. He had that same warm smile as Luke.

“Who wants the first hug?” he said and Ashton chuckled a bit as he stepped off the side a bit to lean against the stairs. He was still looking for one of his boys but for now he was fine with just standing right here.

“I do!” came a female’s voice and Ashton looked to see a woman with an apron around her emerging from the kitchen and then she was running towards Jack.

“Mommy!” Jack said in a child like voice and it had everyone laughing. The woman, who Ashton now knew as Luke’s mom, went to wrap her arms around the much taller boy’s torso and Jack held her tightly. Ashton looked around to see people now going back to what they were doing before. He scanned the room and wanted to find at least one of the boy’s, although he figured they would all be together.

Ashton glanced at Jack once more, seeing that he was now talking to three older guys as he still had one arm wrapped around his mother, and Ashton could tell it had been quite a while since he’s been home. He couldn’t wait to see how Luke reacted to seeing him.

The entrance area of the kitchen started to clear out and Ashton started making his way towards it. When inside he glanced to the right to see a few kids playing cards around the dining room table then he looked around the rest of the kitchen. He felt a few people looking at him curiously and then he was leaning against the counter. It seemed silly since they were all in the same house as him but Ashton just felt like texting one of the boy’s and asking where the hell they all were. It wasn’t that big of a house but Ashton didn’t feel like searching all over, not to mention that he already missed them all like crazy.

Ashton got out his phone but then something was making him look up and he got a huge smile on his face. He could see a small brown haired boy sitting right outside the sliding glass door on the grass as a dog had its head in his lap. Above him was Michael in a lawn chair as he had a cigarette in his mouth and Ashton could tell he kept talking to the boy on the ground as Calum kept giggling up at him. Ashton made his way towards the door then he was stepping outside and both of the boy’s were looking up at him. Calum immediately jumped up and wrapped his arms around Ashton’s shoulders then Ashton was chuckling into his hair as he held him back around his torso.

“Hi baby” Ashton pressed a few kisses to his hair then he could feel Michael’s eyes on him. Ashton winked at the blue haired boy over Calum’s shoulder and Michael instantly turned red as took a hit off his cigarette and looked away as he blew smoke into the air. Ashton pressed a kiss to Calum’s forehead before the boy was backing up and as Ashton walked past Michael he ruffled his hair then gripped it a bit before bending down to kiss his lips. Michael smiled into the kiss then Ashton was sitting in the chair across from him. The dog was getting excited so Calum started to pet him again. Ashton already missed the boy against him though “Come sit on my lap pup” Ashton patted his thighs and Calum smiled wide before plopping down on top of him and Ashton wrapped his arms around his stomach before kissing his shoulder “Where’s Luke?” Ashton said looking over at Michael and Michael took inhaled another hit of his cigarette before speaking.

“He went inside about 10 minutes ago to go get more food and hasn’t been seen since” Michael said dramatically “He warned us that one of his family members might try to talk to him and not let him leave though”

“Maybe someone should go save him” Ashton said just as dramatically as Michael.

“Maybe they should….’they’ meaning you” Michael smirked and Ashton knew he was just being lazy and not wanting to get up.

“If he doesn’t come back out here soon then I will” Ashton was then looking back into the house and now there was hardly anyone in the kitchen “Guess who I ran into before I came in the house” and that caught Michael’s full attention. Meanwhile Calum seemed like he was getting sleepy as he leaned back into Ashton and turned his head to nuzzle into Ashton’s neck. Ashton gave his cheek a few kisses before he slipped a hand under his shirt to rub softly at his stomach.

“Who?”

“Luke’s brother” and then Michael was sitting forward.

“I haven’t seen him yet. What was he like?”

“Well the resemblance is crazy” and that had Michael smiling “He’s really cool…I almost introduced myself as Luke’s boyfriend though”

“Shit” Michael laughed into his hand a bit as he looked out into the yard “I’ve already had to restrain myself with him a lot though” and Michael seemed sad; Ashton hated it and didn’t want him to be anymore.

“Wait why?”

“Luke told me he doesn’t want his parents knowing about us yet” and then Michael was taking a deep breath “Which I totally understand but it’s hard not being able to touch him…I missed him last night”

“Me too” Ashton breathed out and started rubbing his thumb on Calum’s hip bone.

“Me too” said Calum in a sweet voice and Michael and Ashton both chuckled.

“Hopefully his parents don’t make him stay here tonight again” Ashton thought out loud then Michael was smiling and flicking his cigarette to the ground.

“If they do then were gonna have to come kidnap him”

“I agree” Ashton nodded and Calum was too. Ashton watched as a few guys were drinking beers next to the fridge and Ashton just really wanted one; plus he just wanted to find Luke cause he missed the hell out of him “I need a beer”

“You should go get me one”

“I’m not getting up” Ashton said sternly but he knew he would be the one getting up.

“Why not?”

“Cause I’ve got a cute boy on my lap” Ashton said simply which caused Calum to giggle into his neck and lean up to kiss his cheek.

“Give me him then”

“Fine” Ashton huffed and then Michel was smiling a making a “come here” gesture at Calum. Calum put another kiss to Ashton’s cheek then Ashton kissed his lips and Calum was walking over to sit on Michael’s lap. Michael instantly started tickling his sides and Calum was laughing as he tried to wiggle out of his grip.

“Find Luke too” Michael tossed over his shoulder and Ashton just nodded because that was the main reason he was even getting up. Noise hit his ears as soon as he opened the glass door into the house and now the kids at the table playing cards all had paper plates in front of them as they ate hot dogs and chips. Ashton let out a breath and decided to look for Luke way before he thought about getting a beer for him and Michael.

He walked back into the living room and there seemed to be a whole new set of people in there compared to the last time he was in here. He scanned the room and finally his eyes locked on a blond haired boy next to the window as two elderly people were obviously talking his ear off. Luke was wearing a black button up shirt and Ashton bit his lip as he let his eyes rake down the boys’ body. He never seen Luke in anything more than a regular t-shirt or a hoody but seeing him dressed up like this was really getting Ashton going.

He pictured himself unbuttoning the shirt and pressing kisses all up his torso. Ashton loved having his torso kissed and touched and he loved doing that to other people as well. Ashton smiled when he seen the fake smile on Luke’s face as he nodded and backed up a bit when the elderly lady reached out and touched his arm. Ashton leaned against the wall that was separating the kitchen from the living room and just watched the boy. It reminded him of all the times he would watch Luke in school way before Luke ever noticed him.

Suddenly Luke was looking past the elderly couple and he bit his lip as he looked around the room a few times and then his eyes were landing straight on Ashton. The curly haired boy felt his heart skip a beat now that Luke’s eyes were on him and he smiled before winking at the boy. He felt himself chuckling when Luke immediately started to get red as he looked down. The elderly lady was then tapping his cheek and Luke was forced to put his attention on them again.

Ashton looked away from Luke for a moment when he felt another pair of eyes on him. Ashton flicked his eyes around the room then he seen Jack sitting in one of the recliner chairs as he sipped at a beer and had his eyebrows raised as he looked at Ashton. By the smirk on his face Ashton was sure that he just seen him fondly smiling at his younger brother for the past few minutes and wink at him just a few seconds ago. Now it was Ashton’s turn to blush and he looked away from the older boy.

Ashton decided to walk over to Luke, when he couldn’t stand being away from him for any longer, then Luke was smiling wide when he seen him again.

“Hey” Ashton sneakily rubbed his fingers down Luke’s back and tried to desperately think of a lie to get Luke away from these people “Umm…my car won’t start. Come outside with me for a sec?” and Luke was then nodding and Ashton had a feeling he knew exactly what he was doing.

“Yeah” Luke said in an excited voice then he was looking back to the elderly people “Would you excuse me?” and Ashton smiled at his proper tone. The couple seemed to be understanding then Ashton forced himself to stop touching at Luke’s back as they walked out of the living room. It was too loud to speak in the living room so neither of them said anything until they were in the hallway near the entrance way. Luckily it was all closed in so no one could see them then Luke was pouting after Ashton shut the door behind him.

“You’re leaving already?” and Ashton was confused at first.

“Oh” Ashton chuckled when he understood then he smiled and got in front of Luke “No, I just said that to get you out of there”

“I’m so stupid” Luke giggled into his hand and Ashton smiled fondly at him before putting both of his hands on the wall behind Luke.

“I’ve missed you” Ashton said quietly for no apparent reason then Luke was looking down to put his hands under Ashton’s shirt and start rubbing at his hip bones.

“I missed you too” Luke bit at his lip, while he still looked down and Ashton loved when Luke was all shy like this. He put his fingers under the boys’ chin then gently pressed a kiss to his lips

“I really like this shirt on you” Ashton said running his fingers up the slippery fabric and then he unbuttoned the first two buttons to press a few kisses on Luke’s bare chest. He heard Luke’s breath catch in this throat and all Ashton wanted to do was kiss him all over and hear all the beautiful noises he made.

“T-thanks” Ashton had to force himself to stop kissing Luke’s chest then he was looking up at the boy with a slight smile “How long have you been here?”

“Not too long…the boy’s were wondering where you were too”

“My grandparents always like trap me in when they talk to me” Luke let out an annoyed huff and Ashton leaned forward to kiss his lips again before pressing a few to his neck. He felt Luke shiver and Ashton swore all he wanted to do was take Luke upstairs and touch and kiss him all over. He forced himself to back off because if he kissed him any longer then he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from going further.

“Is it frowned upon to drink while underage in this household?” and Ashton’s proper voice had Luke laughing.

“No…do you want a beer?”

“A beer would be lovely” and Ashton wanted to so badly grab Luke’s hand before they walked out of the room but he stopped himself and clenched his fists to make sure he didn’t reach for his hand.

The loud voices were hitting his ears again as they entered the living room and for some reason Ashton found himself searching for Jack. He knew that Jack would be even more suspicious if he seen them coming out of the entrance way together.

When Luke was handing him a beer out of the fridge Ashton looked to see Calum and Michael getting up from the chair then Michael was quickly walking towards the sliding glass door, acting like he was going to die if he didn’t get a beer and Ashton smirked. He jogged to the door and luckily made it there before Michael did and Ashton hurry up and locked the door. Ashton started to drink the beer then chuckled when Michael pulled on the door but nothing happened.

“What the fuck, Ashton?” and he seen the boy actually looking upset. Ashton figured he could slightly get him back for the Calum thing back at the aquarium though.

“Mhmm…it’s so good. Really fresh” Ashton said after taking another few swigs of the beer.

“Let us in” Michael yelled “Calum wants some water” and at that Asthon was opening the door and Michael was laughing as he shook his head and walked towards the fridge.

“You’re too easy” Michael rubbed at Luke’s arm when he passed him and Ashton glared at Michael. He really needed to stop using Calum as a way to get Ashton to cave in. Ashton felt better when Calum was pressing into his side though and he put an arm around the boy. The kitchen was completely empty now and Michael walked over to the counter before jumping to sit on it and opening his beer.

“Do you want something to drink, Cal?” Luke said with the fridge door still open.

“Do you have lemonade?” Calum asked softly and Luek was then digign through is fridge.

“We actually do” he smiled then tossed the can over in their direction and Ashton caught it before opening it and handing it to Calum. Luke was grabbing a can of lemonade as well then he was leaning against the counter next to Michael.

“C’mere” Michael mumbled behind the bottle before grabbing Luke’s shirt and making the boy stand between his legs with his back to his chest.

“Luke!” a high pitched voice was yelling and Ashton seen Luke quickly push away from Michael. Ashton was scared to see the hurt on Michael’s face but he looked anyways. The blue haired boy was looking at the side of Luke’s face as he let his hand fall from his back and Ashton just wanted to make all the hurt go away.

He knew how it felt to have someone push you away and although Luke didn’t mean to hurt Michael like that it still made Ashton feel nauseous. In the corner of his eye he could see a few kids walk into the kitchen but Ashton wasn’t paying attention “Jack wanted me to come get you. He’s in the living room” the same kid said and now Michael was flicking his eyes down to the floor. Sure, Michael had this tough outer shell to him and made it seem like nothing ever bothered him but Ashton seen through all of that. Michael was actually really sensitive and liked cuddling and soft touches. He could also get his feelings hurt quite easily and Ashton could see that happening right before his eyes.

“Okay” Luke let out a breath and then looked away from the little boy “Guys I’ll be right back” Ashton nodded at him but Michael still looked like a kicked puppy. Ashton jumped when one of the kids were pushing past him then staring up at Calum.

“Do you wanna play Go Fish with me?” the kid stared up at him and Ashton looked up to see Calum’s reaction.

“Yeah…sure” Calum smiled and Ashton smiled too when Calum glanced up at him before the little boy was pulling him towards the table where there was already a couple kids ready to play the card game. Ashton felt his happiness from seeing Calum go down the drain when he looked back at Michael. Michael was viciously chewing on his lip and zoning out on the tile flooring. Ashton had never seen him like this and he walked over to him before rubbing one hand up his arm, wanting to get the boys’ attention. Michael was still staring down at the floor though so Ashton moved his hand to start rubbing the back of his fingers down his cheek.

“Michael” Ashton said softly then he was looking up and Ashton swallowed hard when he seen his eyes glazed over. Ashton didn’t even care who was watching as he put both hands in the back of the boys’ hair and kissed both of his cheek before facing him again “Talk to me” Ashton practically begged but still kept his voice soft.

“It’s stupid” Michael shook his head and looked down again and Ashton moved his hands down to start softly rubbing at Michael’s bare arm as he kissed his temple and kept his lips there as he spoke.

“It’s not stupid…please talk to me” and Michel was sighing before looking up at Ashton again.

“I’ve just…never had him push me away like that…well not since before we started this whole dating thing. Back then I would try to touch him and he’d always push me away…it just reminded me of that” Michael shrugged like it was no big deal but Ashton could still see how much this was hurting him.

“He’s not ashamed of you” Ashton said because he just knew that was running through Michael’s head “He just doesn’t want his parents to know yet and he’s scared of getting caught with one of us. That’s all it is okay?” Ashton kissed his cheek and this time Michael leaned into him.

“I know” he whispered as he nodded “It just hurt” and now Ashton felt his eyes getting wet. He held Michael tight as he rubbed at his back and Michael relaxed in his arms.

“M’sorry” Ashton said into his hair and he felt Michael pressing a kiss to his neck “I know he didn’t mean to hurt you” and Michael started to nuzzle into his neck. Ashton would hold him as long as he needed to but Michael started wipe at his eyes and back away from Ashton “Wanna play cards?” Ashton said nodding behind them once they separated, even though Ashton wanted to hold him for much longer. Luckily Michael smiled and then Ashton was leading him over to the table where Calum and the kids were sitting. Ashton felt a weight taken off of him when he watched Michael laughing with Calum and the kids and he made sure to put one hand on his thigh as he would occasionally rub his thumb against it.


	50. Luke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know not much happened in these chapters but the next chapters after this are quite intense so I can't wait to upload those. Let me know what you think of these chapters though! Follow me on [tumblr](http://clifford-affliction.tumblr.com/) if you want!

Luke of course ended up getting cornered by a few of his annoying realitives before he was finally walking up to Jack who was leaning against the window sill as he talked to one of their uncles.

“Luke!” Jack yelled and Luke could tell he was buzzing a bit. Luke just smiled and then their uncle was turning to nod at him “Do you mind if I have a little talk with my brother?” Jack said to the older man and he agreed to it easily before walking away from them.

“My little brother” Jack ruffled his hair and then he was pointing a thumb towards the front door “Let’s go outside for a sec”

“Jack” Luke whined “I gotta get back to my friends”

“We won’t be too long…you’ll be fine” then Luke felt himself trailing behind his older brother as they got out of the house. Luke felt like he could breathe again as the fresh air hit him then Jack was sitting on the front step so Luek did the same. His brother sipped at his beer before setting it down and facing Luke.

“What is this about?” Luke said when Jack started to smirk at him. He was scared of what his brother wanted to talk about.

“I just wanted to say that I really liked your boyfriend” and Luke felt his heart stopping “I just got really good vibes about him” and then Jack was drinking his beer again.

“My b-boyfriend?” and Luke of course had no idea who Jack was referring to because there were three possible guys he could be talking about.

“Yeah…Ashton” and Luke was so confused “I met him in the driveway when I got here…and nice job by the way” Jack smirked at him again “He’s a handsome bastard” Luke blushed at that because well…he wasn't wrong. Ashton was incredibly good looking but so were Calum and Michael and Luke didn’t understand why Jack assumed that Ashton was his boyfriend and not one of the other two boy’s. Had Luke been more affectionate towards Ashton compared to how he was with Calum or Michael? He really wasn’t sure.

“But…how did you know. I mean I’ve been trying to keep it a secret from mom and dad”

“Why?” Jack looked at him like he was stupid “You know mom and dad don’t care”

“Okay but it’s a lot more complicated than you think” Luke rushed out and he hoped Jack didn’t press any more questions.

“Fair enough. Tell them when you’re ready” and Luke nodded, thankful for his brother at times like these.

“You never answered my question from before though”

“Oh” Jack laughed as he nodded “I just knew Luke…Plus I seen him wink at you from across the living room”

“Damn it” Luke felt his cheeks getting red again.

“It’s nothing to be ashamed of” Jack laughed “That dude is hot as hell”

“I’m not ashamed of him…It just embarrassing that you seen that” then Luke was glaring at his brother “And aren’t you straight?”

“Yeah…but it doesn’t mean that I can’t appreciate a good looking guy when I see one”

“I think you’ve had enough of these” Luke said grabbing his beer but Jack was quickly grabbing it back.

“Don’t ever take a man’s beer away from him, Luke” and Luke rolled his eyes as he stood up.

“Are we done here?”

“Yeah we’re done…I’ll torture you more about it later”

“You’re an ass” Luke mumbled and Jack managed to punch him in the leg before Luke walked back inside.

When Luke got back into the kitchen he was happy to see a few of his cousins playing a card game with his boy’s. Ashton was leaning over to peer at his youngest cousins cards then the little boy was giggling and tearing his cards back.

“I just wanted to see” Ashton said to him and Luke leaned against the doorway.

“That’s cheating!” the little boy yelled back and that had Calum and Ashton both laughing. Luke got worried when he seen that Michael wasn’t laughing or even smiling. He was sitting close to Ashton and under the table he could see his and Ashton’s hands clasped on Ashton’s thigh. Luke wasn’t sure why but he just had a feeling that Ashton was trying to comfort him and Luke had to know what was wrong.

He pushed off the wall and walked over to the table to sit on the other side of Michael. Luke got even more worried when Michael didn’t even glance at him. This was so unlike Michael to not acknowledge him like this and it was making Luke feel sick. Luke looked up to see Ashton giving him a caring look then he was mouthing “Go talk to him” in a stern way and nodding towards the back door. Luke quickly nodded and then he was rubbing his hand on Michael’s arm. Thankfully Michael looked at him this time but Luke almost wishes that he wouldn’t have. His eyes were red, like he had been crying, and his lips was pulled between his lips while he looked at Luke like he was a complete stranger. This time Luke really did feel like he was going to be sick.

“Michael” Luke’s voice cracked as he rubbed at his arm again and Michael just looked down “Will you come outside with me?” and Luke felt some weight come off of him after Michael nodded. He glanced down to Michael rub his thumb across Ashton’s hand then they were letting go and Michael stood up. Luke stayed sitting a few seconds as Ashton looked over at him and just nodded at him before saying something to Calum next to him. He got up feeling like Ashton was upset with him a bit and he knew it had something to do with how hurt Michael looked.

When Luke got outside Michael was sitting on one of the lawn chairs and usually whenever Michael got outside he would be lighting up a cigarette but at this moment he just stared at the ground, motionless. Luke swallowed hard and moved another lawn chair so that it was right in front of Michael and their knees were touching when he sat down. Michael was still refusing to look at him so Luke ran a hand through his hair, begging for his attention. It was scaring him so badly how Luke wasn’t giving it to him.

“Michael, what’s wrong?” he moved his hand to start rubbing a thumb on his cheek and that had Michael leaning into the touch and looking up at him.

“When you pushed me away in the kitchen…”Michael shivered a bit “It just reminded me of before we started dating when you’d push me away whenever I would try to touch you”

“Michael” and Luke could feel the tears swell up in his eyes when he leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

“You doing that reminded me of the days when I never thought I’d be able to be with you…it just had me feeling like shit” Luke was then softly pushing Michael back then he was sitting on his lap and Michael instantly wrapped his arms around the boy and dug his face into his chest “I understand why you did it though and I’d never pressure you into telling your parents when you aren’t ready”

“I’m so sorry that I hurt you, Michael” Luke knew he was crying now and he felt Michael start rubbing his hands up his back. Luke started pressing kisses to his hair and rubbed his fingers at the back of Michael’s neck “I wish I could tell them though… I wish I wasn’t such a coward. You guys are the best thing to ever happen to me and I wish I could tell everyone”

“Luke…no” Michael pulled Luke away so he could look at him then wiped the tears off his cheeks “You’re not a coward. I don’t even care if you ever tell them…I’m just so happy that I get to have you like this and sometimes I still can’t believe that I get to. You’re so fucking special to me and I don’t care who knows about us. It’s gotta be hard having to tell someone that you have three boyfriends” and they both laughed at that.

“Well” Luke snuffled and Michael bent forward to kiss his lips and brought Luke back onto his chest. Luke breathed out when Michael started rubbing at his back again “My brother kind of knows about us. He guessed”

“What do you mean?” Michael chuckled.

“He guessed that I’m dating Ashton”

“One down; two to go” and that had Luke laughing into his neck.

“You have such a beautiful laugh” Michael said seriously and Luke sat up to kiss his lips.

“You have beautiful everything”

“Sap” Michael mumbled against his lips and Luke bit at his lower lip “Mmmm” Michael moaned at the action “I love when you bite me baby” suddenly the atmosphere began to change and Luke went from sad to wanting Michael to rip all of clothes off. Michael could do that sort of thing to him.

“I don’t care what my parents say; I’m staying with you guys tonight”

“Good” Michael kissed his neck “Cause we were gonna kidnap you if you didn’t”


	51. Michael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love these next few chapters so I hope you guys do too! Let me know what you think cause I love the comments :)

They boy’s were now laying in Michael’s bed with Michael on the edge next to Luke, Calum next to Luke and Ashton on the other edge of the bed. The TV was lighting up the dark room that was playing an episode of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air but the volume was so low that none of them could even hear it. They were all close to falling asleep anyways…well Calum and Ashton were.

Michael was laying on his side as Luke layed on his back and watched the TV with lazy eyes and Michael always thought he looked so beautiful. Michael put his arm under the blanket they were all sharing and he started to trail his fingers up and down Luke’s bare stomach. He looked up to see Luke closing his eyes at the touch and Michael leaned up to start sucking marks on his neck.

Across the bed Michael could see Calum and Luke’s arms touching and Ashton was laying on his stomach as he had his head buried in Calum’s neck with Calum rubbing his fingers up his arm slowly. It looked like Ashton could be asleep because his eyes were closed but Michael wasn’t sure.

Michael tore his eyes off the other boy’s and closed his eyes as he started biting and licking at the skin right below his ear. Luke moaned out loudly at that and Michael could tell that he didn’t meant to. Michael opened his eyes to see Calum now looking at him as he kissed Luke’s neck and he seen the way the boy was watching his every move; as if he felt left out and wanted to be touched too.

Michael kept his eyes locked on Calum’s as he moved his hand down Luke’s stomach and began palming at his dick under his boxers and Luke was letting out another moan. Michael thought it was so hot when Calum’s eyes flicked down where Michael was touching Luke then he was biting his lip. Michael knew that Calum wasn’t as innocent as he looked and suddenly he got an idea that he couldn’t believe they hadn’t done yet. After all, they were in a four way relationship but they had never once had sex while they were all in the same room. That needed to be changed.

Michael sped up his hand, making Luke a whimpering mess, then he winked at Calum before he grabbed Luke’s jaw and started kissing him fiercely on his lips. He heard a whimper again but this time he knew it didn’t belong to Luke and he opened his eyes to see Calum looking the most flustered he’s ever seen him as he raked his eyes up Luke’s naked torso.

“You can touch him, Cal” Michael whispered before going back to kissing Luke but he still kept his eyes on Calum. Calum lifted his hand out of the blanket and then he was just hovering it over Luke’s stomach like he was hesitating. Calum was then looking back up to Michael and Michael gave him a nod and a smile to encourage him more.

Luckily it worked because Calum reached out to start moving his palm over Luke’sstomach and Luke whined at the new touch and smiled into the kiss when he seen that Calum was touching him. Michael almost chuckled when he looked over to see Ashton obviously sleeping, completely unaware of everything that was happening, as he had his head now on Calum’s pillow since Calum was sitting on his side to touch Luke easier.

Michael still watched Calum as he began to move his hand lower and lower on Luke’s stomach. Michael seen the way Calum’s eyes kept flicking down to Luke’s crotch as he bit his lip but he never moved his hand any lower than his boxer lining and Michael decided to help him out a bit.

Michael stopped palming at Luke’s dick and instead placed his hand over Calum’s as he guided it down to Luke’s dick and then he was moving Calum’s hand for him as it rubbed over Luke’s now hardened cock. Luke moaned out again and Michael slowly moved his hand off of Calum’s hand to let the boy rub at Luke’s dick on his own.

Calum was then licking his lips and glancing up at Luke’s stomach a bit. 

“He likes having his stomach kissed” Michael whispered again as he rubbed at Luke’s lower stomach. Calum was looking up at Michael like he couldn’t believe this was happening but he also looked so excited and Michael moved his hand so that Calum could start kissing Luke’s tummy if he wanted to.

As soon as Michael moved his hand Calum was leaning down and pressing open mouthed kisses on the skin right above the blond boy’s boxers and Luke whimpered as he reached down a hand to start carding it softly through Calum’s hair. Calum hummed at Luke’s touch and then he started licking flat stripes at the skin which was driving Luke crazy.

Michael was so mesmerized by watching how Calum was touching Luke that he had stopped touching and kissing Luke himself. Michael started to kiss at Luke’s neck again and started rubbing his hand all over his chest as he would occasionally pinch at his nipples. Luke began to shake under him and Michael looked down to see Calum now with a hand down his boxers as he rubbed at Luke’s dick and he was licking fiercely at the skin right above his dick. Michael felt so proud and he began to suck at one of Luke’s nipples.

“Guys” Luke was heavily breathing now as he had his eyes shut “F-fuck…fuck, I’m gonna come” but Michael didn’t want this to be over yet. He had other ideas in mind.

“Don’t come yet baby” Michael whispered against his ear and Luke shivered. Michael was then running a hand through Calum’s hair and the brown haired boy immediately stopped rubbing at Luke’s dick and looked up at him “Can you wake Ash up?” and Calum looked so excited as he nodded and turned to face the curly haired boy. Michael and Luke both watched fondly as Calum started to put kisses all over Ashton’s face as he softly said his name.

“Hmm?” was all that Ashton said, clearly still half asleep.

“Ash wake up” Michael said more loudly and sternly than what Calum did and Ashton sat up as he rubbed at his eyes.

“What?” Ashton whined and then he took a double look when he seen Calum start to put kisses on his chest.

“Make Luke come” was all that Michael said and Luke and Calum both laughed at his bluntness.

“W-what?” Ashton said again but this time he seemed more shocked.

“You’ve never done anything with Luke and I’ve never done anything with Calum so…let’s switch” and Michael smiled at this good idea he has come up with.

Michael watched as Ashton’s face changed color every time the TV flashed and he looked somewhere between being turned on and being shocked at what he was being asked to do.

“But umm” Ashton looked down to see Calum still kissing at his skin and he rubbed at the boys’ hair “Cal? You okay with this?” and Michael smiled wide when he seen Calum eagerly nod his head. Ashton looked up again and he was licking his lips as he stared down at Luke but he still seemed like he was thinking about what to do.

“Come on, Ash” Michael said softly as he started to kiss up Luke’s jaw, still looking at the curly haired boy. Michael was so happy when he seen Ashton nodding just as eagerly as Calum had and then he focused back on Luke “Lukey, do you want Ashton to make you feel good? I know he’ll do a good job. He always makes me feels so good” Michael whispered into his ear and he knew that he didn’t even have to say as much as he did because Luke was already agreeing to it but he loved seeing the desperate look on Ashton’s face when he talked about him as if he wasn’t right there listening.

Luke was still nodding as Michael took his face out of his neck then he was reaching a hand over to rub at Calum’s back

“Cal come sit on my lap” he said as he sat up against the head board and then Calum was carefully crawling over Luke to straddle Michael’s waist. Michael instantly rubbed his hands up and down Calum’s bare chest and luckily they were all already in their boxers as Michael started to rub at his inner thighs and then he was bringing their lips together.

It was a lot more fierce than their first kiss and Michael couldn’t help but dip his tongue into the boys’ mouth and start to palm at his dick. Calum let out a moan into his mouth and Michael smiled as he began to move Calum’s boxers down.

“Sit up for me” Michael whispered into his neck then Calum was sitting up so Michael could move Calum’s boxers all the way off his hips. Michael moved his own boxers down then Calum sat back on his lap as their dicks touched and Calum moaned out just from that little touch. Michael decided to stop teasing him then he was wrapping his hand around Calum’s hard dick and began pumping him. Calum let his head fall to Michael’s shoulder and let out a whimper then Michael was using his other hand to start massaging at Calum’s ass and that had Calum letting out a stuttered breath.

Michael realized that Claum really liked having his ass touched and it was a good thing because Calum had such a nice ass and it was turning Michael on so much just from touching it. He moved his hand on Calum’s ass so that one finger was rubbing at his hole and Calum started breathing heavily.

Michael all of a sudden wanted to change positions so that he could make Calum feel even more good. He was then getting off the bed as he still held onto Calum and then he was instructing Calum to lay down on the bed. It wasn’t until now that he remembered that Luke and Ashton were still next to him.

He felt his dick throbbing a bit when he seen Ashton now fully on Luke as they were both completely naked as Ashton grinded into him, rubbing their dicks together as he bit and licked up Luke’s neck. He had never been so turned on by seeing two people together.

Michael snapped back into it and laid on Calum to start kissing his lips harshly and Calum was gripping hard on his neck. He never even knew that Calum could do anything other than soft touches but he loved this side of him as well.

He was then telling Calum to lay on his stomach and Michael couldn’t wait to make the boy start shaking with pleasure.

He started by just massaging Calum’s ass with both hands as he sat back on his heels and he could tell Calum was already loving it as he whimpered into the pillow. Michael was then taking one hand off his ass as he sped up the other one and was now scratching at the skin a bit. He leaned up on the bed and laid some of his weight on Calum’s backside as he started to kiss at the back of his neck and nibble at the skin below his ear.

“You love having your ass touched don’t you, baby?” he whispered for only Calum to hear and all Calum did was nod and moan loudly as he pushed his face into the pillow. Michael couldn’t help but rub the tip of his dick at Calum’s hole and he wanted to fuck the boy so badly but he felt like it was a bit too soon. They had so much time to do that. Michael kissed his face and neck a few more times before he was going down the bed and laying on his stomach as he started to spread Calum’s cheeks and rub a finger at the rim.

Calum began to shake and his moans were muffled by the pillow when Michael started to lick up his hole and stick his tongue inside. Rimming was one of Michael’s favorite things to do and he loved having it done to him as well. He just loved having Calum shake beneath him from the pleasure of it all.


	52. Ashton

Ashton was grinding quickly into Luke as the boy moaned beneath him and Ashton never imaged that just rubbing dicks could feel this good. He was kissing Luke’s neck and face everywhere as he sped up his pace even more and then he was sitting up and straddling the boy as he just ran his hands up his chest.

The view next to him was amazing as well as Calum was lying face down on the bed and Michael was laying in between his legs as he licked his hole and rubbed at his cheeks like his life depended on it. Ashton knew how good it felt to be rimmed by Michael so he knew Calum would be coming soon with how much he was shaking and moaning.

Ashton quickly focused back on Luke and then he was putting kisses and licks all down his chest as he jerked the boy off. Luke’s skin was so soft and Ashton couldn’t stop kissing him all over but he also knew that Luke was incredibly close. He got down further on the bed and got straight to the point as took Luke’s dick into his mouth and just sucked and licked at the tip, making the boy breathe heavier. Ashton started to lick at the underside of it and then finally took the whole thing in his mouth at once causing Luke to fill the room with a loud moan ending with a few curse words.

“Oh my god” Luke’s voice was higher as he spoke and he pressed his head back into the pillow.

“Mi-Michael” Calum was whining into his pillow with how good it felt. Ashton knew that voice and he knew he was close. He smiled to himself and thought it would be so strange if Luke and Calum both came at the same time. Ashton sucked harder on Luke’s dick and started to rub Luke’s balls between his fingers, knowing it would bring the boy even closer.

“Ash-Ash I’m gonna” Luke gripped at his hair and Ashton sped up as he started to lick at his tip and then went down to start to deep throat him. Ashton loved sucking dick so much and felt like he could do this for hours. He actually loved the pain that he got in his jaw when he did this.

Soon Luke was coming down his throat and Ashton swallowed every bit of it before taking his mouth off of him and leaning his face against his thigh. Ashton smiled up at Luke when the boy started to softly pet at his hair and Ashton felt himself getting tired again at the touch.

He looked over right in time to see Calum rutting his dick against the bed as Michael squeezed at his ass and moved his tongue in and out of the boy in a fast motion. Ashton knew that Calum was coming when he let out a loud moan that ended in a high pitched whimper and then he was breathing heavily into the pillow. Ashton felt like he could come just from seeing Calum orgasm so hard and then he was focusing on Michael.

Michael had a smirk on his face as he sat up on his knees and he was still rubbing harshly at one of Calum’s cheeks as his other hand was on his own dick and he jerked himself off in a quick pace. Ashton thought that Michael was so fucking sexy when he was all smug and in control like this and usually Ashton liked being the one in control but after Michael fucked him at that party he knew he would let Michael control him anytime that he wanted.

Luke was watching Michael now too as Michael started to bite at his lip and dug his nails into the skin on Calum’s ass. Ashton felt himself getting a bit worried that Michael was being too rough with him but then he seen Calum leaning up to look back at Michael with a smile on his face. It was a smile that Ashton had never seen and he rutted up against the bed; he was so turned on by everything going on.

Ashton jumped a bit when he heard a harsh slap and looked down to see Michael giving Calum’s ass a slap. Ashton opened his mouth, just about to tell Michael to stop being so rough with him, but then Calum was moaning and pressing his face into the pillow again.

“I found his kink, Ash” Michael looked back at Ashton as he kept jerking himself off and Ashton just laid there motionless and then Michael was smirking; it was a smirk that Ashton loved so much “The boy likes being spanked. Who would have guessed?” and Michael was talking so casually but honestly Ashton still couldn’t believe was what going on. He knew he wanted this to keep happening though and he honestly never wanted to leave this bed.

Ashton just smiled and bit at his lip and then Michael was turning back to Calum as let out a moan of his own and bent his head back as he closed his eyes. He was going to come any second and Ashton had forgotten how hard he was with how focused he had been on Michael and Calum.

Michael spanked Calum’s ass once more, causing Calum to moan out again and press his ass back into Michael’s hand, then Michael was coming all over Calum’s ass.

“Oh fuck” Michael moaned loudly as he gritted his teeth and closed his eyes with his head still titled back. He was pumping himself through his high as his heavy breathing filled the room and then he was swiping up his own come with his fingers and Ashton was wondering what the hell he was doing.

Suddenly Calum was looking back and Michael was holding his fingers up “Wanna taste?” he had that sexy tone to his voice and Ashton quietly whimpered. Ashton was even more turned on when Calum started to nod and then Michael was putting his fingers up to Calum’s mouth as the boy sucked so desperately at his fingers and closed his eyes like it was the best thing he’s ever tasted. How did this become Asthon’s life? He had no clue how he had gotten to so lucky.

“Fuck” Ashton moaned out and pressed his face into Luke’s thigh when Calum started licking up Michael’s fingers. All eyes were on him when Ashton looked up and he realized that he had moaned out a lot louder than he realized.

“Are you still hard?” Michael asked like he was really concerned and Ashton only managed to nod. He wanted to come so bad “Lay right here” Michael said patting at the spot between Luke and Calum and Ashton didn’t need to be told twice. He sat up and crawled in between the boys as he laid on his back and put his arms behind his head “Dibs” Michael suddenly said and Ashton let out a chuckle when Michael was giving Calum’s head a kiss and kissing his lips softly before crawling between Ashton’s legs.

“I’m close, Michael” Ashton said quietly as he ran a hand through his hair and Michael just nodded sternly like he was promising Ashton that he was going to take care of him good; he always did. Michael started to lick at his balls and Ashton already started to shake.

Suddenly Calum was leaning over and bringing Ashton’s lips against his own and Ashton put a hand at the back of his head as he kissed him back just as hard; being able to taste Michael on the boys’ lips. On the other side of him Ashton felt Luke starting to put kisses all up his neck and the touches from all the different places were making him feel so good.

He felt Michael starting to take him all the way in his mouth and he moaned against Calum’s lips. Luke started to suck at his nipples and only a few more seconds went by before Ashton was hitting his orgasm hard; not even being able to warn Michael. Michael of course swallowed it all down like a champ but Ashton still softly rubbed a hand through his hair in a silent apology. Calum stopped kissing him then they were both smiling at each other before Calum was putting his head on Ashton’s chest and Ashton felt Luke do the same on his other side as he held them tightly. Ashton let out a breath and looked down to see Michael smiling up at them all but looking like he was feeling a bit left out and Ashton already missed holding the boy.

“Come here, Michael” Ashton whispered because he was so worn out. Michael crawled up his body and Ashton kissed him passionately as he held him close with his hands on the back of his head.

They backed up as they both just stared at each other and the look in Michael’s eyes was different from the other times he’s looked at Ashton. The look in his eyes was causing Ashton’s heart to flutter and his stomach felt like it was in knots and he had no idea what was happening. Instead of thinking too much about it he leaned his forehead against Michael’s then kissed both of cheeks.

Michael gave Ashton one more peck before he was backing up from Ashton a bit and putting a kiss to both Luke and Calum’s head and then he was resting on top of Ashton and letting his head fall on his chest. Ashton let out a breath with how relaxed he felt. Having all of these boy’s by his side just felt so right and Ashton had never felt so at home. He looked at Calum and Luke and they both had their eyes closed as Ashton kissed them both like Michael had. He could feel Michael’s chest still heaving up and down in a fast pace and Ashton moved his hand to start carding through Michael’s hair.

Ashton kept laying awake and he knew that Michael was awake as well as the other two boy’s softly breathed against him. Michael was letting out a breath and Ashton just knew he was about to say something.

“That was fucking amazing” Michael said quietly against Ashton’s skin as he wasn’t looking at the boy.

“Fuck it really was” Ashton chuckled a bit at how crazy it really was but it didn’t feel weird at all; it felt so natural to be with these three boy’s.

“You know what I just realized?” and Ashton just hummed “Since we’ve all had sex in the same room I think that this makes our 4-way relationship…like official” and Ashton let out a laugh as he kissed Calum’s head and kept rubbing his fingers through Michael’s hair.

“It became official for me a couple of days ago” was all that Ashton said and that had Michael sitting up to look at him.

“When did it become official for you?”

“Well…”Ashton thought back to the football game “When you guys all came to my game that night because it just meant so much to me that you guys were there for me. Plus I remember wanting the game to end just so I could see you guys” Ashton let out another laugh at that and watched Michael smile “And football is like my fucking life…and I wanted the game to end just because I missed the hell out of you three.That’s when I realized that you guys are literally the most important thing in my life…that was when it became official for me” Ashton let out a breath and felt like he might have said too much and gone too deep with his feelings when Michael was just staring at him with his lips parted a bit. Ashton started to get nervous but then Michael smiled and all his worries went away.

“You know…” Michael glanced at Luke then looked back to Ashton “I was sure that Luke was the biggest sap out of us all but I was so wrong; it’s you” and Ashton rolled his eyes which caused Michael to start laughing as he let his head fall onto his chest again while still looking up at Ashton. Ashton just stared down at the boy as he giggled into his chest and god….Ashton was so fond of him.

“Come here” Ashton whispered as he touched Michael’s face and Michael’s stopped laughing and just smiled as he moved up Ashton’s body then settled with his head right below Ashton’s neck. Ashton started to rub his hand up Michael’s bare back and felt the boy breathe out against him.

“So sleepy” Michael yawned and Ashton couldn’t help the fond smile on his face. He was reminded of the way Michael was in tub in the bathroom that night.

“Get some sleep” Ashton moved one hand to rest at the back of Michael’s hair.

“You still gonna be here in the morning?” Michael said jokingly. Ashton was dead serious about the next thing he said though.

“I’ll always be here” he whispered as he pressed a kiss to his hair and Michael laid completely still against him for a few seconds. Michael was then leaning up to look at Ashton and Ashton swore that his eyes were glazed over.

Suddenly he felt Michael’s lips moving desperately against his own and Ashton held him tight as he kissed back with just as much force. Ashton felt as if he had been stuck in the hot desert for days and Michael’s lips were the fresh water that he needed to survive. Ashton moaned into his mouth then Michael was moving back and resting his forehead on Ashton’s cheek as he breathed heavily. Ashton put soft, loving kisses on his face until the boys’ breathing was going back to normal.

“Fuck” Michael sounded as if he was crying and Ashton held him tighter. He was scared of what Michael was crying about and then Michael was moving to nuzzle his face into Ashton’s neck “I love you Ash” he said it so quiet that Ashton wasn’t even sure if he heard him right and his heartbeat started to pick up as he let out of breath from those strong words. They were words that he had been dying say.

“I love you too, Michael” and Ashton could feel the tears beginning to form in his eyes but he clenched his eyes shut to stop them “I really fucking love you” he hated how his voice cracked but he just put kisses to Michael’s head and ran his fingers down his back to try and calm himself down. He was not going to let himself cry. Michael took his face out of Ashton’s neck and started kissing his lips like his life depended on it but it was still somehow soft and loving at the same time.

“I feel bad though” Michael whispered against his lips and Ashton became worried “When I said that for the first time I wanted them to hear it too” Michael glanced at Luke and Calum as he said “them” and Ashton knew exactly what he meant. He loved them all so much and if Luke and Calum were awake then he would tell them too “I just couldn’t hold back from saying it any longer”

“It’s okay” Ashton wiped the back of his fingers on Michael’s cheek “I honestly almost said it that night when we were in the tub but I held it back for the same reason that you were”

“That night at the party?” Michael’s mouth was open a bit and Ashton nodded.

“I wanted to tell you so badly how much I love you” Michael stared at him fondly for a few seconds before he was opening his mouth.

“I wanted to say that night too” he smiled and Ashton felt a warmness in his stomach as he kissed the boy softly “I’m umm….” He looked like he was ashamed of what he was about to say “I’m not gonna lie…When this whole thing first started I thought it would just be temporarily until we figured out who we really loved then we would separate into pairs but it’s not like that and it never was; we were just all meant to be together” and Ashton nodded. He’d be lying if he didn’t say that he thought that same thing at the beginning.

“I thought that too…but then I realized that it really is possible to be in love with three people”

“It doesn’t even feel weird…us all being together, you know? It just feels so right”

“I know exactly what you mean” Ashton leaned forward to kiss his cheek then he watched as Michael was looking in between Calum and Luke again “We’ll tell them how we feel when we get to have some sappy moment like this with them too” and Michael laughed at that.

“I hope there’s plenty of sappy moments like this to come” Michael smiled down at him and that’s all that Ashton wanted too.

“There will be…I promsie” Ashton kissed the boys’ nose then his cheek and then Michael was letting his head fall on his chest again.

“Night, Ash” he said kissing his skin.

“Night….” And Ashton just had to say the thing that had always been missing when he told the boys’ night “I love you”

“I love you too” Michael whispered and Ashton could tell by his voice that was getting tired again. Laying in bed with the three boys he’s loved more than anything made Ashton feel the most alive he’s ever felt and it was a feeling that he never wanted to go away.


	53. Calum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!

When Calum’s eyes began to flutter open he could tell that he was facing the opposite side that he was before as he now looked at bedroom door. The sun was just barely shining through the window so he knew it wasn’t very early. He could also feel a warm body behind him and he really wasn’t sure who it was but they smelled of mint soap and laundry detergent. Their breath was softly blowing on Calum’s hair and when Calum looked down to see the arm around his waist he just knew it was Luke who was next to him.

Calum carefully turned so he could face the boy and smiled when he seen Luke with his face in the pillow. He glanced up to see red scratch marks on Luke’s bare back and that was when Calum was reminded of what had happened last night. He knew the scratch marks were from Ashton and he carefully ran his fingers over the red marks.

He drifted his eyes upward and seen that there was also bruises on Luke’s neck. Calum could remember hearing Luke’s loud moans over his own when Ashton was touching and kissing him. Calum also remembers the way that Michael made him feel; the way he licked at his hole so slowly that it was making him shake and want more, the way he kept kissing his thighs and holding them tightly as he ate him out. Calum never had anyone do that sort of thing to him before and he kind of felt like it was his favorite thing to have done to him.

He also liked having his ass spanked which also surprised him; he loved the burning feeling on his skin after Michael slapped him and he liked knowing that he would have a mark the next day. Calum desperately wanted to get out of bed to see the marks on his ass but he also didn’t want to leave Luke.

The blond boy was breathing softly against the pillow as his stomach moved every time he breathed. Calum thought he had the most soft and beautiful features and he started to run his fingers down his cheek that wasn’t in the pillow. Calum really wanted to kiss him but he didn’t want to disturb his sleep either. Calum instead got closer and put the lightest kiss to his cheek and then his temple as he rubbed his fingers up his spine. Luke made the smallest whimper when Calum kissed the side of his mouth and then the boy was moving a bit and opening his eyes.  
Calum got the warmest feeling in his stomach when Luke instantly smiled at the sight of him.

“Morning” Luke’s rough voice gave Calum a chill and he leaned forward to peck his lips properly. Luke melted into it and put a hand on his cheek as he deepened the kiss.

“Morning” Calum got out when they had to come back for air.

“Last night was…” Luke chuckled and briefly looked away “Incredible”

“Yeah” Calum blushed as he remembered the way Michael touched and kissed him so eagerly like he couldn’t get enough “It really was” Luke started running his hand down Calum’s bare back then he was trailing lower until his hand was just above his boxers.

“Does your ass hurt?” Luke let out a breathy laugh and Calum smiled at how cute he was.

“A little” but Calum didn’t mind it at all “I like it though” and that had Luke laughing again.

“Well that’s good cause I’m pretty sure Michael loved doing that just as much as you loved having it done to you” and Calum was blushing again which caused Luke to lean forward and kiss his rosy cheeks.

“I don’t want to get up but I gotta take a shower” Luke laid back into the pillow and rubbed at his eyes. Calum just nodded and began closing his eyes from the soft touch of Luke’s fingers on his back “Wanna take one with me?” and Calum couldn’t contain how much he loved that idea as he smiled and nodded eagerly.

In the bathroom they were both still standing in their boxers as Luke kept putting his fingers in the water coming out of the shower, waiting for it to get hot. Calum couldn’t believe how far he’s come because just a few weeks ago he couldn’t stand his body and didn’t think he would ever let anyone see him naked but now he was almost all the way naked, standing in front of Luke, under bright lights and it wasn’t even bothering him. He just trusted these boy’s so much and he knew they would never judge him for anything.

Sometimes it scared him how much he really did depend on them and need them because they seemed too good to be true. Calum has never felt this happy with anyone and everyday he was scared that he would lose them all. They had been such a big part of his life that Calum couldn’t even remember how he survive without them. He does remember how depressed and worthless he always felt before they came into his life though. He felt like no one would ever love him and he just wanted to be cared for so badly.

When Ashton drove him home that night the boy had only been around him for a few minutes but Calum was already so addicted to the way Ashton cared for him. From the second that Ashton picked him up from the ground he just knew he would be okay.

Calum looked up to see Luke reaching a hand out for him with a smile on his face and then they were both getting out of their boxers and stepping into the hot shower. Luke let Calum get in first and Calum closed his eyes at the soothing water hit his back then he watched as Luke got closer to him. Luke put both hands on his neck and started to put the softest kisses all over Calum’s face and Calum reached out to wrap his arms around Luke’s torso as he pulled the boy closer to him. Luke’s grip around his neck tightened a bit as he moved to start kissing his neck. Calum felt the sleepiness he had go out the window and he felt his dick getting hard as it slightly rubbed against Luke’s.

He had a feeling that Luke was getting just as desperate as he was because he moved his face to start kissing Calum’s lips in a fast motion. Calum couldn’t help but grind into Luke a bit to get some friction and that action had Luke moaning into his mouth. The moan alone was making Calum shiver.

Luke was then putting a hand on his chest and gently pushing him back against the shower wall and Calum watched as Luke put one hand on the wall behind him to hold himself up and the other was on his hip. Luke closed his eyes and let the water run down his face and Calum was so gone for the boy. Calum whined a bit then he was reaching between them and grabbing both of their dicks in his hand, causing Luke to get even closer to them so that they were just about chest to chest.

Calum slowly started to jerk them both off and he watched Luke open his eyes as he started to bite at his lip and then he was closing them again when Calum sped up his hand. Luke then was resting his head on Calum’s shoulder and letting out whimpers as he bit and kisses at the skin. Biting was another thing that Calum had realized that he really liked and he had a feeling that there were a lot of things that he loved but he just hadn’t experienced them yet.

Calum moved his hand up so that he could rub his thumb against Luke’s slit and that had Luke moaning loudly and squeezing Calum’s hip. Calum started to speed up his hand and twisting it in a way that he knew he loved himself and Luke was heavily breathing before lifting his head up and bringing them into a heated kiss. Calum loved how he got a different feeling from kissing each of the three boy’s. Luke was would be shy at first but by the end it was like he needed the kissing in order to breathe. Michael was always rough and eager right from the start and Calum loved it so much. Ashton kissed with so much love and passion and Calum always felt so safe with him, he felt safe with all of them but there was just something a bit different about Ashton. Calum has a feeling it’s because Ashton was so caring towards him right from the beginning where as Calum hasn’t had as much time with Luke and Michael.

Calum could feel Luke’s hand moving off his hip as it started to drift to his back and then it was moving down and Calum smiled into the kiss at knowing what Luke was about to do. Luke began to massage at his left ass cheek and it had Calum whimpering into Luke’s mouth and stilling his hand for a moment at how good it felt. Calum sometimes felt like he could come just from having his ass touched and he was already so close because of that extra touch on his cheek. Calum let his own dick fall from his hand as he just focused on Luke’s and he started rubbing his thumb around the tip, just trying something different and it made Luke dig his nails into his ass.

“F-fuck, Cal” he said breathlessly and he moved down to start biting at Calum’s neck.

Soon Luke was coming all over his hand and Calum looked down as it happened while Luke moaned and shook against him.

“Shit” Luke panted on his shoulder and then he was moving quickly to bring their lips together again and Luke grabbed Calum’s dick to start pumping on it at a fast pace. Luke’s other hand was still on his ass and he let his index finger start slipping between his cheeks as he rubbed circles around Calum’s hole.

“Lu-Luke” Calum whimpered and he felt like he was close to crying with how good Luke’s hand and finger felt. It was his finger on his hole that was getting Calum the most though and he pressed back into it causing Luke to smile into the kiss then he just leaned his forehead against Calum’s face. Calum couldn’t help but cry out when Luke pressed the finger into him and just started rubbing at the insides and Calum knew he was so close “Feel’s s-so good”

Calum started shaking as Luke starting thrusting his finger in him faster and Calum didn’t want it to end but he just couldn’t hold back any longer. He was coming on both of their stomachs then he instantly fell into Luke’s chest and Luke wrapped both arms around his shoulders as he held him tight and pressed kisses to his wet hair. They were both breathing heavy and Calum just had put kisses on the blond’s chest. He loved kissing stomachs and chests; that was another thing he was realizing.

“I have a feeling that Ash and Michael will be really bummed that they missed out on this shower” Luke chuckled into his hair and Calum giggled as he nodded. He began to wonder where they both were and he somehow already missed them. He figured that Luke missed them too “Turn around for me for a sec” and Calum was confused but he did it anyways of course. Calum leaned his forehead against the wall, still feeling worn out, as he felt Luke’s hands on his ass again. Luke chuckled and Calum turned back to look at him “You’ve got Michael’s hand prints on your ass” and Calum just smiled. He wished he could see them for himself.

“Good” Calum giglged out and that had Luke chuckling again “And you have Ashton’s scratch marks down your back”

“So that’s why my back stung when I stood under the water” Luke smirked then Calum was turning around to look at the beautiful blue eyed boy. There were droplets of water going down his face and his wet hair was sticking to his forehead as he smiled softly. Calum reached out to wipe the hair from his forehead and Luke’s smile seemed to get even softer. When Calum let his hand fall from his face he still kept it close to Luke as he started to trail it down his chest. Calum for once felt some courage and there was something that he really wanted to tell Luke.

“You’re really beautiful, Luke” and Calum quickly flicked his eyes up to see the boys’ smile fade “I just thought….I would tell you” Calum spoke so quietly and he could feel his cheeks heating up under Luke’s stare but he couldn’t bring himself to look up. He had never really given a compliment like that to anyone and altougth it felt good to say it he still felt shy. Luke’s fingers were then hooking under his chin and Calum was looking up again. He was so confused when he seen Luke’s red eyes and he was scared that he said something wrong until Luke was smiling again.

“Cal…so are you” and Calum felt himself getting close to tears with how sincere Luke’s words were. Luke got closer to him and he began putting kisses on his cheeks before rubbing their noses together, making Calum giggle. Luke smiled wide at the high pitched giggle and then he was kissing his lips “So fucking beautiful” Calum just wanted to be held by the boy so badly so he leaned forward and closed his eyes when Luke’s arms went around him and held him tight. He felt like he was lying on a cloud with Luke’s fingers softly rubbing on his shoulders and his soft kisses on his head. Calum didn’t even know it was possible to be this happy.

*

After standing in the shower for a few minutes more they both felt like they would fall asleep if they didn’t get out. They were now standing by the mirror as Luke rubbed Calum down with a towel and then put it on his head to start drying his hair off. Calum smiled and sighed at the nice feeling and then they were both getting into their boxers and going back into Michael’s room. Calum followed Luke over to the closet and then he was picking out a pair of Michael’s sweatpants for both of them and two t-shirts. They both put them on and Calum breathed in Michael’s scent. He loved wearing the boy’s clothes. Luke put a kiss to the top of Michael’s head before walking back to the bed when his phone made a high pitched sound. Luke was smiling but when he picked up his phone Calum got worried when he began to frown and looked worried.

“Shit” Luke now just looked annoyed but Calum still walked towards him.

“What’s wrong?”

“I have five missed calls from my mom” he sighed and started to tap things on his phone. Calum knew what that meant and it was never a good thing “You can head downstairs if you want cause this won’t be pretty” he chuckled a bit but Calum could tell he was dreading it.

“Okay” Calum shot him a smile and Luke returned it before he was sitting on the edge of the bed and letting out a breath. Calum really wanted to stay with him but Luke was acting like he wanted to do this alone so he decided to let him be. Calum glanced at the boy once more before he was leaving the room.

The house was silent as he went down the hallway and he was actually scared that Ashton and Michael weren’t here. He feels like they would have told him if they left though.

Calum got closer to the balcony then he started to hear deep voices and shooting noises. Calum smiled as he looked down to see the two boy’s sitting side by side on the couch that was facing away from him so Calum could only see their backs. Ashton had his feet on the coffee table in front of them and Michael was slouching as his feet were thrown over Ashton’s lap. They looked so peaceful, even though the video game on the screen was anything but, and Calum didn’t even want to interrupt them. He leaned against the balcony railing and watched as they were hitting the buttons the controllers. Calum though he seen Michael move his leg a bit and then Ashton was sighing.

“Quit fucking doing that” Ashton whined and then Michael was scoffing.

“I’m not doing anything”

“Yes you are” Ashton was pausing the game and then looking over at him “You keep rubbing your leg on my dick whenever the game starts to get difficult”

“My leg was cramping up” Michael shrugged and it was clear that he was lying.

“Bullshit” Ashton rolled his eyes away then they were playing the game again.

A few more minutes went by without an argument but then Calum could see Michael beginning to move his leg again.

“God damn it” Ashton said pushing Michael’s legs off his lap “You just killed me”

“I didn’t do anything!” and Michael was slightly laughing as he faced Ashton “It’s not my fault that you’re just shitty at this game”

“You’re cheating” even from here Calum could see Ashton glaring at Michael “Go sit on the couch over there and I guarantee that I could beat you” Michael was rolling his eyes then putting his feet back on Ashton’s lap and Calum had to suppress a laugh. Michael was then getting a smirk on his face and he moved his leg to rub his foot on Ashton’s crotch. Suddenly Ashton was tightening this jaw and in a second he had Michael pinned down on the couch as he straddled him. Michael started to laugh loudly as Ashton started tickling him.

“Ash! Seriously stop!” he yelled but he was still giggling loudly and Calum bit his lip as he smiled wide at the both of them. He didn’t exactly want to interrupt them but now he really wanted to be included in this. He started to walk down the stairs and when he got closer to them Ashton was still tickling Michael like crazy. Michael’s eyes landed on Calum and Calum smiled wide at the boy “Calum save me!” he said in a high pitched voice and it had Ashton stop tickling him and the he was turning his head to look at Calum.

“Morning pup” Ashton did one of his bright and big smiles and Calum got closer to them.

“Morning” he said shyly and then Ashton was reaching out to grab his shirt and he pecked a kiss to his lips.

“Have you been up for a while?”

“Yeah but me and Luke took a shower” and Calum got red at thinking about what happened when they were in the shower.

“Yeah I can tell” Michael smirked up at him and Ashton chuckled. Calum was confused but then Ashton was touching his neck and the skin there felt sensitive.

“Come here” Ashton said softly and then he was guiding Calum to the other side of the couch. They all sat up and then Calum was sitting in between them as Ashton wrapped an arm around him and switched on the cable which had Michael whining. Calum felt Michael’s head fall on his shoulder and then his hand was rubbing at Calum’s thigh in a soothing manner. Ashton kissed his head and this all felt just like last night except Luke was missing and Calum really started to worry about him.

“Where’s Luke?” Michael suddenly said, reading Calum’s mind.

“He had to call his mom” Calum grabbed Michael’s hand and intertwined their fingers. He looked over to see Michael smiling at their hands and then Michael gave him a kiss on his shoulder. Calum felt like he could go asleep again with how comforted he felt.

His eyes did start to get heavy as Ashton hummed next to him while skimming through the channels. The word Florida State was being said and Calum chuckled a bit when Ashton hurry up and went back to that channel. On the screen it looked like the players were practicing as they ran drills on the field and like always Ashton sat up with his elbows on his knees.

“That could be me next year” Ashton said so quietly like he was just saying it to himself and Michael scoffed and Calum looked at him, wondering why Michael was being like this. Calum looked over to see Ashton scowling at him and suddenly the air seemed thicker. The tension hadn’t been like this since they all first met at the pizza place and Calum was a bit scared “What was that for?” Ashton said still glaring at Michael. Michael took a deep breath and looked away like he regretted making the sound that he did.

“I’m just saying…the chance of being scouted into a college football team is pretty slim” Calum wished he wouldn’t have looked back to see Ashton’s reaction because he looked so hurt but it quickly turned to anger before he was looking back to the TV.

“Wow…thanks for having so much faith in me” Ashton mumbled sarcastically as he changed the channel “Jesus Christ, Michael” and Calum couldn’t stand seeing Ashton so sad. He turned on his side and pressed his face into Ashton’s shoulder as he started to rub a hand up his side. Ashton seemed to be appreciative of the touch because put a kiss on top of his head, despite being still upset, and Calum was so amazed by how sweet Ashton was. Calum swung his arm over Ashton’s torso and started to rub at his opposite hip. Ashton had comforted Calum more times than Calum could count so now it was Calum’s turn to make Ashton feel better. Calum didn’t really want to but he looked over to see Michael looking down to the floor and it really worried him. They were no longer holding hands and Calum wanted to reach for it again.

“I just don’t want you to get your hopes up” Michael quickly said like he was trying to think of what to say during the entire time that it was quiet. Ashton didn’t respond and instead just nodded, acting like he wasn’t upset anymore, but it was obvious that he was. Calum knew how much Florida State meant to him and he really wished that Michael wouldn’t have said what he did. Things were going to so well for them and even though it was just a small argument he was still scared that this would break them. He began to get worried that Ashton and Michael would slowly stray away from each other until one of them decided that they didn’t want to be in the relationship anymore; Calum felt the tears swell up in his eyes even thinking about that happening. There was no way that could happen though and Calum was trying to so hard to calm himself down. He knew he was overreacting but he just couldn’t help it.

“Cal” Calum jumped and looked up to see Ashton giving him a worried look “You okay?” Calum closed his eyes for a moment and it was only then that he felt the wetness in his eyes. Calum only got even more sad when he felt Ashton’s fingers swiping under his eye and he didn’t know what he would do if he didn’t get to have the boy’s touches anymore. Calum managed to nod and he looked back at Michael to see him leaning his face on his hand as he was zoning out on the floor again. The situation only seemed to get worse when Michael got up and Calum could feel himself shaking. Was Michael going to leave the room then tell them all to leave? Calum had no idea what he was doing but he already missed the boy next to him.

“Michael?” Calum said so weakly and Michael only spared him a quick glance before walking into the kitchen.

“Sometimes I can’t figure him out” Ashton said quietly as he looked where Michael had just been sitting a few seconds ago. Ashton was then tearing his eyes away and rubbing the back of his fingers on Calum’s cheek and Calum already felt better “But he’s not mad at you, baby” and Calum closed his eyes as he nodded. He could see that him being sad was making Ashton sad and Ashton never deserved to be anything but happy.

“I don’t want him to be mad at you either though” Calum whimpered a bit when Ashton tilted his head up and kissed his lips. He loved Ashton’s kisses so much.

“He won’t be for long…it’ll pass” and Calum trusted him. He had to keep telling himself that things would go back to normal in no time. They had to “You looked afraid of something pup. What are you scared of?” and it was so Ashton to know that Calum was worrying about something.

“I just…” Ashton pet a hand through his hair and kissed his nose to encourage him to continue “I’m just scared of this breaking us…I can’t…” Calum shook his head and felt himself crying again “I can’t lose you guys”

“Hey” Ashton was making Calum look up at him again “Listen to me, baby. I’m not gonna lie…it hurt to hear Michael say that but that doesn’t mean that I don’t still care about him. You all mean the fucking world to me and some little argument isn’t going to change that okay?” and Calum nodded, he realized now that he was being ridiculous “I love you guys way too much to let this break us” and Calum felt his eyes widen. Ashton just cupped his cheek and brought the boy into another kiss and it was as if Ashton was sealing those words with how lovingly he kissed Calum “I love you so much” Ashton said as his lips still touched Calum’s and Calum felt the tears in his eyes again but this time for an entirely different reason.

“I l-love you too” he sniffled and then Ashton was wiping his tears away again. Ashton looked sad again so Calum just had to assure him that these weren’t sad tears “They’re happy tears” and Ashton smiled softly as he seemed to relax then he was kissing him again.

“Should we see what Luke is up to?” and Calum nodded quickly. Ashton looked away and smirked and Calum wondered what he was thinking of. Suddenly Ashton was grabbing Calum then throwing him over his shoulder and Calum giggled loudly as Ashton carried him up the stairs.

“Don’t drop me!” Calum laughed out when Ashton moved his arm down his legs.

“I’ve got ya” Ashton said holding him tighter. They started going down the hallway then soon they were walking into Michael’s room and Ashton froze right after they passed the doorway. Calum began to get worried when Ashton’s wasn’t saying anything.

“Lukey?” and Ashton’s voice cracked which made Calum even more scared. Luckily Ashton was putting him down and Calum turned to look where Ashton was as they stood side by side. He felt his worry setting in again as they both looked at Luke was was laying face down on the bed with his eyes wide open. Ashton began to walk over to the bed but Calum felt frozen. He watched as Ashton sat on the bed and started to run a hand through Luke’s hair “Luke what’s wrong?” Luke shook his head then he was sitting up on his elbows as he let out a breath.

“My mom…she thought I would be excited and I normally would be but now that I have you guys…I just don’t want to go” and Ashton rubbed a hand down his face and Calum was silently begging Luke to say more “Were going to Mexico for winter break” and Calum felt his stomach drop “And I was really looking forward to spending the break with you guys. I couldn’t wait to have all the free time with you three. I don’t wanna go but she’s making me” Luke started to shake his head as he looked down at the bed. Ashton started to rub a hand down his back and then Luke was collapsing on the bed again.

“Fuck, Luke” Ashton ran a hand over his face like everything he had just said was hitting him at once “We’ll still be here when you get back though. It will only be a week” his words were soft again as he touched Luke’s hair. Calum felt like he could move again and he went on the other side of the bed as he laid right behind Luke and wrapped his arms around the boy. He seen Luke closing his eyes at the touch then he was leaning back to gently kiss Calum’s lips.

“I’ll just really miss you guys” Luke whimpered as he looked back to Ashton. Ashton almost seemed like he was fighting off his own tears but then he was laying on the other side of Luke and kissing his forehead as he put both hands on his cheek.

“We’ll miss you too, Lukey” Ashton was then letting out a breath and looking at the door “I wish Michael would quit being an ass and get up here”

“What happened?” Luke sounded so worried but Calum understood why. That was him only a few minutes ago.

“It’s stupid” Ashton shook his head “Don’t worry about it” he said kissing Luke’s lips then he was grabbing Calum’s hand and intertwining their fingers over Luke’s chest. Calum started to close his eyes again “When do you leave?” Ashton whispered, probably knowing that the boy’s were getting tired.

“Tomorrow” Luke whined and nuzzled into Ashton’s neck as he pulled Calum closer.

“It’ll be okay” Ashton promised with a kiss to Luke’s cheek “A week will fly by and then when you get back we’ll all do something together” that made Luke smile so Calum did too. Ashton really was incredible. He always had a way of making people feel better no matter what. He was such a good person and Calum felt so so lucky to have him in his life. He felt so lucky to have all these boy’s in his life, even if one currently wasn’t cuddling with them. He knew him and Ashton would make up though. Everything would be fine just like Ashton said and Calum felt his eyes getting heavy as he felt Luke’s warm body against him and Ashton’s fingers trailing on his hand


	54. Michael

Michael had both arms on the counter and his face in his arms as he sat on the stool feeling like the shittiest person in the world. He could actually feel himself getting sick from remembering how hurt Ashton looked when he thought that Michael didn’t believe in him.

Michael just wished that Ashton knew that it wasn’t that at all. Michael knew how talented Ashton was and he had no doubt in his mind that Ashton could get into any college that he wanted with how good he was and that was what scared Michael the most; he knew that if Ashton got into Florida State then he would easily accept the scholorhsip and just leave them all behind like it was nothing. Michael knew that Ashton cared about them but something inside him was telling him that Ashton cared about that scholarship more.

Michael knew he was being selfish; knew he should be happy if Ashton got into that college but he just loved Ashton too much to just let him go like that. He knew he couldn’t ever try to distance himself from the boy either because he was in too deep now. He needed Ashton and Michael was so afraid that a day would come where he wouldn’t have him anymore; that day being with he got accepted in Florida State because Michael just had this strong feeling that he would.

Michael sniffled and wiped his eyes on his sweatshirt sleeve a few times before taking his head out of his arms. He hated knowing that Ashton was upstairs right now thinking that Michael didn’t think he was talented enough to get into that college; but Michael also knew that if he told Ashton the real reason why he said what he said then Ashton would know how selfish he was and there was just something about Ashton that made Michael want to be a good person; probably because Ashton was such a good person and Michael wanted the boy to be proud of him.

Rain began to hit the roof hard and Michael thought that the weather was pretty appropriate for how he was feeling right now. He knew he couldn’t sit here and feel shitty about himself any longer though and he slid of the chair. He made sure that his eyes weren’t red anymore but looking in the window reflection because there was no way that he could let Ashton know that he was crying; if anyone should be crying it should be Ashton for how terrible Michael was to him.

The dark skies outside were making the house seem gloomy and it seemed like it was way later in the day than it actually was. It was making Michael sleepy and all he wanted to do was curl up next to his boy’s. He had gotten so attached to sleeping with him that he found himself not even being able to sleep if they weren’t next to him. Michael knew that kind of dependence on someone wasn’t healthy but he just couldn’t help it; they meant the world to him.

Michael got up to the top of the stairs and dragged himself towards his bedroom, sort of dreading having to show his face to Ashton. He didn’t deserve the boy; he really didn’t deserve any of the boy’s for how badly he treated Ashton.

When he rounded the corner into his bedroom he had to lean against the doorway when he seen the three boy’s in his bed. He smiled to himself as Ashton had Luke held to his chest, with a hand still in his hair like he had fallen asleep while still combing his fingers through Luke’s hair. Calum was on the other side of Luke as his face was pressed into the pillow and his arm tightly around Luke as well. They all fit so perfectly together and Michael swears that he falls in love with them more every day.

He focused back on only Ashton and watched as his bare back went slowly up and down as he breathed. His curly hair was a mess and pushed up against the pillow, his strong arms wrapped around Luke like he never wanted to let him go and Michael just needed to be close to him.

Luckily there was an open spot on the large bed that was right next to Ashton and Michael took a deep breath before walking into the bedroom. He could hear all of their soft breathing as he got closer and he still thought it was so weird how none of them snored; they all looked so peaceful when they slept.

Michael hovered over the bed and made sure to be as careful as possible as he laid behind Ashton. He knew Ashton was a heavy sleeper so the boy was still fast asleep when Michael got halfway under the covers.

He looked down at Ashton’s tan, and slightly freckled from the sun, back and couldn’t help but rub his hand up his bicep then lean forward to kiss his shoulder. Ashton still didn’t stir at all so Michael started peppering more soft kisses across his upper back and on the back of his neck. Michael kept his face at the nape of Ashton’s neck and felt the tears swelling up in his eyes again when he began to get scared that Ashton was still mad at him; Michael knew he had every right to be. He kept rubbing his hand softly up and down Ashton’s bicep, it was only then that Ashton let out a little whine and Michael knew he was waking up. Michael bent forward to start kissing the side of his neck then put a small kiss to his cheek.

Michael got scared of what Ashton was doing when he started to grab for his hand that was still resting on his bicep but then Ashton was intertwining their fingers and putting their hands over his chest. Michael felt himself smiling down at their hands and seen that Ashton still had his eyes closed.

“Ash” Michael whispered against his shoulder and Ashton let out a little groan like he would rather be sleeping “I’m…” Michael swallowed hard and pressed his face into the boys’ hair, not wanting to cry “I’m so sorry” Ashton didn’t say anything and instead just rubbed his thumb against Michael’s hand and Michael took that as a good sign but he still wanted him to talk. He sat up a bit and seen that Ashton’s eyes were still closed, like he wasn’t fully awake or he just didn’t want to deal with this right now but Michael knew he needed to say more “I hope you know how much I believe in you…I know you’ll get into that college and that’s what scares me the most” at that Ashton started to open his eyes then he was looking at Michael in the corner of his eye like he wanted him to say more “I know I’m being selfish but I don’t even know what I would do if you moved that far away”

It seemed like hours went by that Ashton was just staring at Luke in front him but Michael knew he was thinking hard about what had just been said; it was making Michael so nervous though. To distract himself he started to put kisses on the back of Ashton’s neck again and he felt Ashton shiver as the goosebumps began to show up on his skin.

Michael felt weight coming off his chest when Ashton was turning around slowly to face him and they were just staring at each other as Ashton tensed his jaw a little.

“Didn’t I tell you that I’d always be here?” his voice cracked a little from being asleep but it was still such a stern tone. Michael nodded, remembering what Ashton had said to him last night after they said “I love you” to each other “Well I meant it” his words were even more serious this time; like he was trying to force Michael to believe them. Michael did but there was still something eating away at him.

“But what about college and-“Michael was cut off by Ashton’s lips pressing firmly against his and he melted into it as Ashton ran a hand up his cheek then stopped at the back of his hair as he slowly moved the tips of his fingers on his scalp. It was such a soothing feeling and Michael felt all his worries go away in an instant.

“Don’t think about that right now” Ashton whispered still close to Michael’s mouth and Michael just nodded again as he closed his eyes.

“I’m just so sorry for what I said down there…I really am Ash” Michael squinted his eyes shut when he thought about what he heard Ashton saying to Calum after he had left the room “I never meant to hurt you”

“Shhh” Ashton said softly as he moved his hand down Michael’s chest then put it around his back to bring him closer to him. Michael buried his face in Ashton’s chest and let out a breath “It’s okay…I know you didn’t” Michael kissed his bare chest a few times then moved his head away from the boy a bit so he could look at him again.

“I just say the stupidest shit sometimes and I never mean any of it” Michael said seriously but it had Ashton chuckling and Michael felt himself smiling too as he started rubbing his hand on Ashton’s bicep again.

Michael felt himself looking over Ashton at the other two sleeping boy’s and he started to feel bad again.

“Calum doesn’t think I’m mad at him right?”

“He did…” Michael seen the way Ashton’s face fell a bit “But I told him you weren’t” and Michael smiled. He doesn’t even know what he would do without Ashton

“But ummm…I’ve got some bad news about Luke” and Michael froze but Ashton was putting a soft hand on his cheek “He’s not dying or anything but his parents are making him go to Mexico for Winter Break. He has to leave tomorrow” and Michael felt himself getting depressed once again. He couldn’t help but reach a hand past Ashton to start petting a hand through Luke’s hair.

“So we won’t get to spend Christmas with him…” Michael said sadly as he still didn’t look away from the blond boy.

“No” Ashton rubbed a thumb on his skin “But we can Skype him all the time. It’s only a week. Plus I told him we’d all do something together when he gets back”

“Yeah?” Michael smirked “What did you have in mind?”

“Not that” Ashton chuckled and Michael knew that he was also thinking about last night as he bit at his lip and looked away for a second “I was thinking of taking a trip somewhere” and Michael felt himself getting so excited at the thought of taking a road trip with all of them.

“I can’t wait” Michael smiled before kissing Ashton again then he pressed himself right up against him “I really am sorry” and that only earned a laugh from Ashton as he shook his head.

“Stop apologizing” Ashton whined.

“Well I am” Michael started pressing open mouthed kisses to Ashton’s neck and the boy let out a desperate whimper when Michael bit at his skin “I feel really shitty about what I said… I wanna show you how much I love you” Michael spoke honestly as he kept kissing Ashton’s skin.

“I know how much you love me” and then Ashton was chuckling a bit “I can feel your love for me on my leg” and both of the boy’s let out a laugh but Michael did really mean what he said.

“I’m being serious though” Michael whined a bit as he rubbed a hand up Ashton’s side. He just loved feeling his warm skin on his fingertips.

“Kiss me then” and Ashton’s voice sounded slightly begging which turned Michael on even more. He quickly took his face out of Ashton’s neck then smashed their lips together. It was messy at first but Ashton was then putting a soothing hand in Michael’s hair and Michael slowed down a bit. He let out a breath and sucked on Ashton’s lower lip like his life depended on it and then Ashton was licking across Michael’s lip before he dipped it inside, making Michael moan. Michael rubbed his tongue against Ashton’s slowly as he let out a content sigh. He loved kissing Ashton so much and he couldn’t believe that only a few minutes ago he was scared that Ashton wouldn’t ever forgive him. Their love was way too strong for that and Michael was realizing that now. At this point Michael felt like nothing could tear him apart from these boy’s.

After kissing until he couldn’t even breathe anymore he leaned back to cuddle into Ashton’s chest again as he felt the boys’ strong arms wrap around him and rub at his back. For some reason Michael started to get worried again that Ashton would leave them; that all of this was just temporary and he started to get that sick feeling again. He didn’t understand why he kept stressing out about Ashton leaving but he just couldn’t stop thinking about it.

“Can…” Michael began but he wasn’t sure if he should continue. Ashton rubbed at his hair and kissed his head, sensing his nervousness “Can you tell me again that you’ll always be here?” and Michael got scared when he heard Ashton swallow hard. He started to regret speaking now…that was until he felt Ashton’s hand going under the back of his shirt and rubbing his fingers up his spine. He felt himself close to tears again as Ashton leaned up to kiss his cheek and kept his lips there.

“I’ll always be here, baby” and Ashton had never called him that. Michael felt his breath hitch in his throat at Ashton’s soft words…he always spoke so softly but it was really getting to Michael now. Ashton put a hand on Michael’s cheek then moved the boys’ head back so that he could kiss his lips “I promise” and Michael believed him.


	55. Luke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update..everything in my life has been changing a lot and it's been stressful but anyways..let me know what you think of these chapters!

On the morning that Luke had to leave he wasn’t taking anything for granted They all ate breakfast together at the counter and Luke kept looking over at all the boy’s as Michael sat close to him. They had barely even left each other’s sides these past few weeks and Luke honestly didn’t know what he would do when he was without them for a full week.

To anyone else a week was nothing but to Luke it felt like an eternity. Not to mention that they were all really coming together and getting to know each other even better in just these past few days and Luke just hoped everything was the same when he got back. He also thought about how Michael and Ashton would get into little bickering fights and usually Luke was the one to break them up. Without him here he was afraid that things might go further than just small arguments. He knew Ashton and Michael would never hurt each other but he was just scared that they would argue more often and more intensely while he was gone.

Whenever they would argue it seemed to really get to Calum and Luke was always the one to calm him down. Luke started to worry about Calum now too and just hoped that he would be okay if the two other boys did start to argue.

Luke also started to think of all the things he would probably miss out on while he was gone. He was really looking forward to spending Christmas with the boy’s and now he would have to spend it with his family in some foreign country.

It had been raining ever since last night and Luke thought it was appropriate considering the circumstances but he still would prefer it to be sunny out instead. The sun always made him feel better.

Luke looked over to see Michael laughing at something Ashton said on the other side of him as he had his mouth full of milk and he was trying not to choke on it. He watched as Michael swallowed it then still ended up coughing and Luke smiled as Ashton started to hit him hard on the back.

Calum was on the other side of Ashton as he sipped at his orange juice with a fond smile on his face as he looked at Ashton. Calum caught Luke’s eyes on him and then he was smiling with his teeth and going back to his food. God, Luke was going to miss these boys so much.

“Luke” and Luke was instantly looking up to see Ashton with a worried look on his face “Are you okay? You haven’t even taken a bite out of your pancakes” and pancakes were Luke’s favorite but he just couldn’t bring himself to eat. He was just feeling so depressed.

“Yeah…I’m not very hungry” Luke mumbled and he felt Michael rubbing softly at his back.

“We’ll talk to you every day, Luke” Ashton spoke again and Luke nodded “A week down there will fly by…just try to have fun”

“I’ll try” Luke gave Ashton the best smile he could just for his sake and it was worth it to see Ashton’s bright smile.

“I’m gonna miss you so much” Michael said fake crying as he pressed his face into Luke’s neck and even though he knew Michael was kidding about the crying thing he still wrapped an arm around him and held him tight. Luke kissed him on the head and then he felt real tears already forming in his eyes.  
Suddenly his phone was vibrating and he sighed as he seen a text from his mom.

“What did it say?” Ashton said looking down at the phone.

“My mom is coming to get me in a half hour” Luke mumbled and then he rested his head against Michael’s “I really don’t wanna leave guys”

Luke looked up to see Ashton getting up from his stool then wrapping both of his arms around Michael and Luke as he kissed Luke on the cheek.

Only a few seconds went by and Ashton was urging Calum to join in as well and Luke felt so safe with all his boy’s holding him. This is what he was going to miss the most; just the warmth and love he felt whenever they held him like this. Luke couldn’t help but sniffle and then Michael was kissing his cheek and leaning his forehead against the same spot.

“You’re gonna be okay” Ashton whispered as he kissed the top of his head and Luke felt like he could just stay like this forever.

*

They were all sitting on Michael’s front porch when Luke’s mom called and said she was on her way. Luke was dreading it even more than before now that he knew he didn’t have much time left with them but he had to keep telling himself what Ashton had told him; he was going to be okay and it was only a week…so why did he feel like it was such a big deal? He wasn’t sure but he just felt so depressed.

Luke was then looking to Michael and Ashton and feeling like he should tell them something before he left.

“And guys…” they all looked to him but Luke focused on Ash and Michael “Just try not to argue too much while I’m gone cause Cal doesn’t like it and I won’t be here to calm you guys down” and then Michael was rolling his eyes away while Calum was giving Luke a thankful smile. 

“We don’t argue” Michael said “Ashton just doesn’t know when to stop talking” and then Michael was smirking at the curly haired boy.

“No” Ashton said sternly “You just have to fight me on everything”

“That’s so not true!”

“Guys” Luke chuckled, cutting them off “You’re doing it right now” and then Ashton was nodding and putting an arm around Calum as he kissed his lips softly.

“If we start arguing just tell us to shut up” Ashton said and it had Calum giggling. They all knew Calum wouldn’t ever say that to any of them.

Luke was smiling at all of his boy’s and wishing so badly that he could just stay here with them. He couldn’t even imagine how great it would be to spend Christmas with them and he hated his parents for taking him away from them.

Michael must have sensed Luke’s sadness because he was grabbing Luke’s hand and holding it tightly before putting a kiss on his cheek then nuzzling his face into Luke’s neck. Luke wrapped his arms around Michael’s shoulders then just held him while he closed his eyes. He had no idea how he was going to be able to go without this for a week straight.

Soon Luke’s mom was pulling up and Luke was standing up, feeling more depressed than ever. Michael instantly clung to him and then Ashton was coming on the other side of him. Calum got right in the middle and started pressing soft kisses all over Luke’s neck and Luke was so close to tears.

“I-I’ll miss you guys so much” Luke said into Ashton’s hair and Ashton started to rub his fingers up and down Luke’s back. Ashton was then nodding and then giving Luke’s cheek a kiss.

“I love you, Lukey” Ashton said quietly into his skin and now Luke knew for sure that he couldn’t stop the tears. He was just about to say it back but then Calum was speaking.

“I love you too” his voice was so soft and innocent as usual and Luke felt his heart speeding up. Luke looked to Michael and the boy still had his face burrowed in his neck. It wasn’t like Luke wanted to force Michael to say “I love you” but Luke just thought he would since Calum and Ashton had.

Luke felt Michael tensing his jaw and then rubbing a hand on his hip bone.

“Luke come on! We have to get to the airport!” and all the boys jumped at the sound of Liz’s voice from the car.

Luke let out a breath and then they were all separating. Calum was smiling at him and Luke could tell he had been crying so he leaned forward and kissed the boy’s lips. Luke caught Ashton fondly smiling at him and Luke loved when Ashton looked at them like that.

Luke turned to see Michael looking down at the ground and Luke hated seeing him like this. He just kept biting at his lips and tensing his jaw and Luke could tell he was forcing himself not to look up.

“M-Michael?” Luke begged for him to look at him but still nothing.

Luke was going to walk away and then Michael was grabbing his hand and squeezing it before letting it go but he still never made eye contact and Luke forced himself to look away from the boy

“Well umm…bye guys” Luke said and he noticed that Ashton kept looking over at Michael like a worried parent then he was plastering on a smile and looking over at Luke.

“Bye bub” Ashton playfully ruffled his hair and Luke giggled “We’ll talk every night alright?”

“You promise?”

“I promise” Ashton said sternly and Luke believed him.

He gave them all one last kiss but even then Michael never looked up.  
Luke was then walking over to the car and getting into the backseat without a word. He told himself that he wouldn’t look at the boy’s again but he found himself peering out the window anyways. Ashton was now standing next to Michael with an arm around his shoulder and Luke could tell that Ashton was asking if him if he was okay; that made Luke feel better knowing that Ashton was going to be there for Michael.

The car took off and Luke still looked back as he seen Ashton rubbing at Michael’s shoulder and giving him a kiss on the forehead.

The boy’s became harder to see as the car got closer to the end of the road but Luke still didn’t look away.

He watched them all walk into the house and then his mother was turning off the road and Luke could no longer see them. He felt tears swelling up his eyes and wished he would have kissed and held them more. He knew it was only going to be a week but God, that felt like an eternity with how much time they spent together.

*

They were just started to leave town and Luke was feeling more empty than ever. He hated that he didn’t even know how to function on his own anymore.

Before he had met those boys he didn’t even have any friends and it never bothered him that he was always by himself. Now he was so dependent on them that he couldn’t even stand being away for a week? Luke began to think about Ashton getting into Florida State…what would he do then? Ashton would be gone for months at a time and even then they would only get to see him for Christmas Break and then Ashton would have to go back to Florida. Luke forced himself to stop thinking about that because going that long without seeing Ashton would kill him and he knew Michael and Calum felt the same. Not to mention that now was not the time to be thinking about something like that.

Luke rested his head on the window and was starting to let his eyes fall shut when his phone started to vibrate. He quickly unlocked it and smiled wide when he seen who it was from.

  
_Michael_

_I love you so much. You know how much I love you baby and I didn’t say it to you before you left because I knew I would start crying if I did. Have fun and I’ll see you soon angel_

Luke felt himself crying again as he put a hand over his mouth. Michael had never called him angel and he hoped to god that Michael would start calling that on a regular basis because he loved it.

Luke kept reading the text over and over as more tears swelled up in his eyes then he put his phone on his lap when he couldn’t take it any longer. Michael was so amazing.

Luke only picked his phone back up when he realized that he hadn’t texted back.

_I love you so fucking much Michael and I already miss you like crazy. I’ll talk to you soon_

Luke put his phone back in his pocket and even though he knew they were almost to his house, he still had to pack before they went to the airport, he still closed his eyes and just wished that when he opened his eyes again he could see his boy’s again.


	56. Ashton

As soon as they had walked into the house Michael had laid down on his stomach on the big couch, making no room for Calum or Ashton so Ashton guessed that he just wanted his space right now.

Ashton sat down on the couch next to Michael’s then Calum was laying down on his stomach as well but he put his head on Ashton’s laps and Ashton started to rub his fingers through the boys’ hair.

It was obvious that they all already missed Luke like crazy but Ashton didn’t want to just mope around the whole time they were gone and he knew Luke wouldn’t want them doing that either. They had to get out of the house and Ashton refused to let them just be depressed all day.

Courage The Cowardly Dog was playing on the TV and Ashton took it as a good sign that Calum kept smiling at certain parts.

Michael on the other hand still looked miserable as his eyes weren’t even focused on the TV but were instead on the floor; yeah Ashton needed to get them out of the house.

A few seconds later his phone was vibrating and he seen a text from Connor saying “Call me”. Ashton honestly thought it was some sort of an emergency and he got scared for a few seconds. He quickly pressed the call button then he was putting the phone up to his ear as he still rubbed at Calum’s scalp.

“Hey, Ash” and Connor said it in a almost snotty tone.

“Is everything okay?”

“Sure” and Ashton knew that was sarcasm “I just wanted you to call me because I had to make sure you’re still alive”

“What do you mean?” and Ashton could feel Calum staring up at him as he turned on his back a bit.

“Dude we haven’t hung out in like months” and yeah Ashton had to admit that he had been giving most of his time to Calum, Luke and Michael but he was sure that when school was still in he would talk to Connor quite frequently.

“I don’t think it’s been months”

“Yeah well that’s what it’s felt like…” and now Ashton could tell that Connor was getting sad and he felt bad. He had been neglecting his friend a bit…or a lot.

“I’m sorry” was all that Ashton could think of to say.

“Where have you been, man?”

“Just ummm….” His stuttering on his words caused Michael to look at him now. What was Ashton supposed to say? He couldn’t say “Oh just hanging out with my three boyfriends” because Connor wasn’t even aware that he was gay…not to mention that having three boyfriends was not a normal thing and Connor would probably think he was insane. Ashton started to panic a bit.

“You there?”

“Yeah” Ashton said quickly “I’ve just been…having some me time” and Ashton seen the way Michael rolled his eyes away when he said that. It wasn’t true at all considering that he literally always had at least one of the three boy’s by his side and it had been like that for several weeks now.

“Well we should chill” and Ashton felt himself swallowing hard “That winter carnival thing is going on down by the boardwalk and I was thinking of heading down there”

“What’s going on there?” Ashton didn’t even know why he asked that.

“I don’t know…but it’s gotta be more fun that sitting in your house having ‘me’ time” and Connor chuckled a bit. Ashton was about to correct him to tell him that he wasn’t at his house actually but he held his tongue. He figured he owed it to his friend to hang out with him for a little bit since he hadn’t in weeks.

“I’ll go but umm…can I bring people?” and Ashton felt Calum and Michael’s eyes on him again.

“Oooooh….got yourself a girlfriend…and her friend for me?” and Ashton shook his head fast.

“No”

“Well then-“

“We’ll be there in a few. Just meet me at the skate park”

“Alright..see ya then” and then Ashton hung up; finally feeling like he could breathe. He hated himself for not being able to tell Connor (or anyone) about his boy’s. He was so proud of them; he really was but no one was even aware that he was gay and Ashton was just scared because he didn’t know how people would react.

“What was that about?” Michael mumbled but his eyes were on the TV now.

“My friend Connor wants me to meet him at the winter carnival. You guys wanna go?” and Ashton looked down to see Calum smiling wide as he nodded and he pet a hand down the boys’ face “I knew you would pup” and then Ashton was looking at Michael who didn’t look as enthused to go “Come on Michael” he said softly but Michael shook his head.

“I’ll pass. I’d rather not hang around your asshole friends” and Ashton frowned at that.

“Connor’s nice” Calum suddenly said and Ashton remembered how good Connor was being with him after Calum got beat up in the gym.

“How do you know him?” Michael spoke more softly when he was talking to Calum. Calum opened his mouth a few times but no words ever came out. Ashton understood why.

“Connor helped me get Calum to the nurses office that one day” Ashton said and he hoped Michael wouldn’t ask any more questions about it. Michael nodded sadly then he was looking back to the TV “Michael please just come…Luke wouldn’t want you being miserable the whole time he’s gone” and Ashton seen the way Michael’s jaw tensed when he mentioned Luke.

He did seem like he was considering it as he bit at the inside of his cheek and looked around the room. Ashton just really wanted him to go and he would feel bad about leaving Michael here all by himself.

“Fine” Michael finally said and Ashton smiled “Calum come help me find something to wear” Michael said getting up. Calum sat up in Ashton’s lap with a smile on his face as he leaned forward to give Ashton a kiss on the lips then he was scurrying off after Michael and Ashton watched them fondly as they walked up the stairs side by side.

*

Ashton just flicked through the channels waiting for the boy’s to come back down since he was already dressed in jeans and a hoody. Michael usually stayed in his pajamas if he they didn’t go anywhere and it was just something that Ashton was used to by now.

Soon the two boy’s were coming down the stairs and Ashton was smiling then taking a double look at Calum. Calum’s hair was all messed up as he tried patting it down and his face was beat red. Ashton knew that look.

“Michael what’d you do to him?” Ashton smiled a bit then Michael was walking past him and grabbing his coat.

“Nothing” he shrugged “You ready?” he said with his coat now on and his hands in the pockets. Ashton didn’t believe it for a second though as Calum was biting his lip and looking down to the floor.

“Sure” he said sarcastically then he walked over to Calum to put a kiss on his head before handing Calum’s coat to him and then getting his own on.

* 

It was a lot colder than what Ashton expected and he watched as Michael walked towards his jeep.

“I’m driving” he said sternly and Ashton didn’t feel like arguing about it. He let Calum get the passenger seat then he slipped in the back behind Michael as Michael quickly turned the heat on as Calum shivered and dug his face in the side of his coat. Ashton couldn’t help but lean forward and rub his hand up and down the boys’ arm to try and warm him up and Calum smiled back at him “Alright, where we going?”

“The skate park on the beach” Michael just nodded then he was pulling out and driving down the road. Ashton leaned back in his seat and looked to the right. It already felt so strange without Luke and he hated it. He tried to picture the blond boy bouncing in his seat on their way to the carnival and Ashton found himself smiling. He really hoped Luke was doing okay and he knew he would want to text him later tonight when they got home.

It didn’t take long to get into town and then Michael was coming up to the skate park. They all piled out of the car and Calum stood in the middle of Ashton and Michael as they walked.

There was kids constantly laughing loudly and screaming and it seemed like there was a couple holding hands wherever Ashton looked. He wanted to hold Calum’s hand so badly and he looked down to see the boy trying to warm them in his pockets. Ashton hated that he was so scared of what people would think and he prayed that the boy’ s didn’t think he was ashamed to be with them because it wasn’t that at all.

Ashton looked to the right and seen the waves hitting the shore and remembered how every summer him and Connor would be swimming at the beach practically every day. Things would be much different this summer though and Ashton couldn’t wait for it.

He breathed out and watched his breath in the air as they got closer to the skate park and Ashton could already see Connor sitting on one of the benches off to the side. He was looking down at his phone and didn’t even noticed when they were standing in front of him.

“Connor” Ashton chuckled and then Connor was laughing and standing up.

“You made it!”

“Yeah…I wasn’t going to bail on you” Ashton laughed again and then Connor was looking at Calum with a smile.

“Hey Calum” he said nicely and Ashton thanked god for Connor speaking so softly to him.

“Hi” Calum shyly smiled and Ashton couldn’t help but reach a hand behind him and rub softly at his back. Connor’s smile was fading a bit once he looked at Michael. 

“This is Michael” Ashton said quickly and then Connor was reaching a hand out to him.

“Connor” and thankfully Michael shook his hand. Ashton didn’t know why he was so nervous but Michael just didn’t seem like he liked Connor very much and the whole atmosphere was just off.

“I’m hungry” Ashton shot out and all the boy’s looked at him “I really want a corndog” Ashton was looking at some of the concessions signs along the boardwalk.

They all seemed to agree and then they were walking towards a concession stand.

After they all bought a corndog they were sitting against a wall of a small building as they watched people pass. Ashton was in the middle of Connor and Calum as Michael sat on the other side of Calum and Ashton couldn’t stop looking over at him. He had this bad feeling that Michael was mad at him for some reason and he hated it.

“So…” Connor began as he took another bite of his corndog “I really called you down here because I wanted to tell you something”

“Yeah what?”

“I got a pretty important call yesterday” Connor said smiling as he looked ahead and Ashton wished that he would just spit it out already “I got a call from a Mr. Green…from Florida State University” and Ashton’s eyes widened. He knew what Connor was trying to say and he couldn’t even believe it.

“You got in” Ashton whispered and Connor just nodded as his smile never left his face.

“Yeah I got in…I fucking got into Florida State University” Ashton started to get a pain in his stomach and he knew it was pure jealously. That was his school and Connor knew that. It wasn’t like Connor was purposely doing this to him but he knew Connor had gotten accepted into other Colleges as well but he picked the one that his best friend wanted to go to the most.

“Wow…” Ashton was a bit speechless “That’s amazing Connor” and he hoped his friend didn’t catch on to the slight anger in his voice.

“I honestly never thought it’d be me” Connor began and Ashton looked away to stare at Calum and Michael. Calum was looking down as he ate his corndog but Michael was looking off into the ocean looking more miserable than before. He knew that Michael hated whenever Florida State got brought up and Ashton really just wanted Connor to stop talking about it, for several reasons “I was sure it’d be you actually” Connor chuckled and Ashton looked back to him “I still think you’ll get in though” and Ashton shook his head.

“Two kids from the same team getting drafted into the same college; it’s highly unlikely” Ashton spoke dully.

“You never know” Connor shrugged and Ashton just really wanted to go home. He was already sick of being here.

A few minutes went by then Connor was leaning forward to look past Ashton; for some reason it made Ashton feel nervous with the way he was curiously looking at Michael and Calum and Ashton bit at his corndog.

“So are you guys together?” and Ashton nearly choked on his food but luckily swallowed it down. All Connor did was quickly glance at him then his attention was back on Calum and Michael.

“We are actually” Michael said in that smart ass tone he uses and Ashton began to bite at his lip.

“You are guys are cute” Connor suddenly said and that had Ashton taking a double look at him. It wasn’t like he thought that Connor was some homophobic prick (because he wouldn’t even be friends with someone like that) but he didn’t exactly think that Connor was the type of person to say that any couple was cute…let alone a gay couple. It just didn’t seem like him at all.

“Well thank you” and Ashton was so happy to see Michael smiling for real when he spoke. It seems like he hadn’t smiled like that since before Luke left.

“Now we just gotta get Ashton back into the dating scene” Connor said lightly hitting Ashton on the chest and Ashton literally wanted to throw up. He could feel Calum’s eyes on him but he refused to look up. He knew it would kill him to see the look on Calum’s face. Instead when Connor was looking away Ashton put his hand between him and Calum and softly rubbed at his thigh with the back of his hand. He just had to touch him to let the boy know that he was sorry. He was sorry that he was such a coward. He never hated himself more than right now. Luckily he seen Calum softly smiling when he looked up and he just hoped the topic would change.

“We’re gonna go get a lemonade” Michael said standing up and stretching and then reaching a hand down to help Calum up. Michael locked eyes with Ashton and Ashton just sadly shook his head; he really didn’t want them to leave. Michael just licked his lips and swerved his eyes away then Calum was standing next to him and he was smiling at the boy. Ashton just wanted Michael to smile at him that way and he missed it so much. Calum bit his lip and shot Ashton an apogetic smile before they were walking away without Michael sparing him another glass.

Ashton felt miserable. Today just felt like he was in this deep hole and he knew he would have to find a way to climb out of it.

“You okay?” Connor said looking at him and Ashton just nodded; he wasn’t okay at all right now but the only person he wanted to talk to about it was Michael. He hated it so much when Michael was mad at him. He hated when Michael would distance himself from him, it left him feeling so empty.

Whenever it was just him and Michael they fit so well together and had deep talks and Michael was so loving with him but whenever Luke or Calum were around it was like Michael was a completely different person. Ashton wasn’t sure why that was but he needed to get to the bottom of it. It would eat him alive if he didn’t. 

“So that’s who you’ve been hanging out with these past few weeks?” Connor said nodding towards Calum and Michael walking down the boardwalk. They were holding hands and Ashton knew that Michael was upset but he hoped that Calum wasn’t hurting too.

“Yeah” Ashton said quickly.

“Don’t you kinda feel like the third wheel?” Connor laughed and Ashton just gritted his teeth.

“Nope. Not at all”

“Well I know this girl who-“

“Connor” Ashton put one hand up. He was losing his patience so fast “I don’t want you to set me up with anyone okay?”

“Okay okay” Connor put his hands up and Ashton hated how angry he was getting with his friend; he just couldn’t help it and all he wanted to do was go home and lay in bed with Michael and Calum and tell him how much he loves them. He loves them more than anything and he hopes that they don’t doubt that for even a second.


	57. Michael

Michael watched fondly as Calum slurped at his lemonade and he took a few drinks of his own. He felt his eyes keep drifting towards Ashton in the distance and seen the curly haired boy with his face in his hands as he still sat against the wall.

Michael wasn’t mad at Ashton; he really wasn’t and he felt like such an asshole for walking away from Ashton like that. He just figured that would give him a bit of time with his friend that he hadn’t seen in a while.

Not to mention that Ashton seemed to be very uncomfortable with the whole conversation that had been going on. Connor had been nice just like Calum said but Michael was selfish and he just liked having Ashton to himself (he would only share him with Luke and Calum of course).

“Hey, Michael?” Michael looked over to see Calum looking at him with a worried look on his face.

“Yeah, baby?” Michael said wiping some hair off his forehead and Calum melted into the touch like always.

“Connor seems to be okay with us being gay” he took a deep breath and looked down “So why doesn’t Ashton want to tell him that he’s gay?” and Michael had been wondering that too.

“I don’t know…It’s just that all of this is new to Ashton and he’s just a bit scared of what people will think of him if he comes out” and Calum nodded, being understanding of it “He’s not ashamed of us though. I know he isn’t” and Calum smiled at that. Michael couldn’t help but lean forward and peck his lips then his cheek and Calum blushed.

“Michael m’cold” Calum said in the cutest voice that Michael had ever heard then he was looking around a bit.

“Let’s go in this building” Michael said grabbing Calum’s hand again and then leading them to this flower shop that was right next to them.

When they got inside they were instantly warmed up by the heat in the building but it wasn’t too hot. A short girl behind the counter said “Hello” to them and Michael nodded at her before he was leading them down the first isle.

The smell of flowers washed over him and it was so comforting. He turned back to see Calum smiling wide as his eyes skimmed over everything like he didn’t know what to look at first and Michael smiled too.

“Do you like flowers?” Michael said squeezing his hand and Calum just nodded fast.

Michael stopped walking when he felt Calum taking his hand away that Michael had been holding and he looked back to see Calum stopped as he picked up a pinkish orange colored flower and then he was putting it up to his nose. Michael fondly did a breathy chuckle and it had Calum looking at him. 

“You’re so cute” Michael chuckled again and Calum smiled wide before leaning into Michael with the flower still in his hand and Michael kissed his temple and kept his lips there “I’ll buy you a flower if you want” he said softly and he felt Calum nodding “Do you want this one?” Michael touched the petals on the flower in his hand.

“Hmmm” Calum started to look around a bit.

“There’s a bunch over there too” Michael pointed behind them with his thumb and then they were walking to the other side of the store.

Calum was so overwhelmed with happiness as he looked at the flowers hanging from the ceiling then back to the ones on the floor and everywhere else. Michael knew he would take Calum here again since he loved it so much.

Calum started to look at some bright yellow flowers that were small in size but there was a bunch of them. He picked them up and then he was smelling them like he had before. Calum was then looking over to Michael and putting them up to his nose too and Michael smiled. This boy was unbelievabley adorable.

“mmm.. they smell good”

“I think I’m gonna get these ones" Calum said then he was looking down and inspecting them again. They had looked at basically ever inch of this store but Michael still didn’t want to leave. It was so peaceful and Calum was so happy here. It seemed like all their worries went away as soon as they walked inside.

“Those ones are really beautiful” Michael said reaching forward and touching them then he was stepping forward and putting kisses all over Calum’s cheeks making the boy laugh “Not as beautiful as you though” he said kissing his lips and Calum smiled as he closed his eyes for a few seconds like he was really soaking in what Michael had just said to him.

When Michael was looking down at the flowers again he felt Calum wrap his arms around his torso then the shy boy was kissing him on the cheek a few times and Michael burrowed his face into his neck. He just really wanted to be home right now.

Michael looked past them to see that it was already started to get dark out.

“We should go find Ash” Michael said into his hair and Calum nodded against him.

After they bought the flowers Calum couldn’t stop looking at them and Michael wished he could buy him all the flowers in the world.

It was much colder than before and Michael zipped his coat then Calum was doing the same.

They were still stood right outside the flower shop and Michael noticed that Ashton and Connor were no longer sitting right across the road. He then heard someone clear their throat and it had Calum and Michael both looking to where the sound came from.

Ashton was sitting on the bench right against the flower shop wall and he had his elbows on his knees as he turned his head to look at them.

“Why didn’t you come inside?” Michael asked and Ashton just shrugged and looked to the ground.

“Thought I’d leave you guys alone for a little bit” he was then letting out a breath and looking at them with a sad expression “I was an asshole. I’m sorry”

“No you weren’t” Calum said softly and all of his happiness seemed to go away now that he was seeing Ashton so sad. Ashton forced a smile then stood up and walked towards them. He stopped right in front of Calum then rubbed a hand on his cheek before pecking his lips.

Ashton looked at Michael, seeming like he wanted to do the same thing to him but Michael could tell that he was scared to. He probably thought that Michael was mad at him but he wasn’t and he really wanted Ashton to kiss him too.

The moment had passed for Michael to speak up when Ashton was focusing on Calum again as a real smile formed on his face.

“What do you got here?” Ashton said touching the flowers.

“Michael bought them for me” Calum was practically glowing as he looked at the flowers then back up to Ashton.

“Well that was nice of him” Ashton fondly smiled again and Michael felt his breath getting caught in his throat when Ashton showed the same smile to him.

Ashton was then seeming like he was wanting to kiss Michael again but then he was closing his eyes and looking away

“Do you guys wanna head out?” and both of the boy’s were nodding. Ashton had no idea how badly Michael wanted to be at home right now.

*

As soon as they got in the house Calum was walking into the kitchen and Michael walked past the room to see him grabbing a glass from the top shelf and then filling it up with water. He leaned against the doorway to fondly watch the boy as he put the flowers in the glass then put it up on the windowsill.

Michael’s smile faded a bit when he seen Ashton just walking up the stairs by himself. He was clearly feeling shitty about what had happened and Michael wanted to change that.

Once Calum came out of the kitchen they were both walking up the stairs and Michael could tell that Calum was already getting sleepy as he kept leaning against Michael as he walked. Michael kissed his head then they were coming up to the bedroom.

The light was turned off and the TV flashes were lighting up Ashton’s face as he laid in the very middle of the bed. Calum walked in first then he smiled as he looked at the TV.

“Finding Nemo is on” he said in an excited voice, getting closer to the bed.

“Yeah it’s just starting” Ashton yawned and Michael didn’t know why he hadn’t walked in the bedroom yet but he felt frozen “Do you mind if I have the middle tonight, pup?” and Calum shook his head and he was stripping down to his boxers then Ashton was pulling the blankets back so Calum could climb in next to him.

Michael looked to empty spot next to Ashton then he finally walked into the room. He got down to his boxers too then got under the warm blankets and rolled on his side so that he was looking at Ashton instead of the TV. Ashton looked at him in the corner of his eye but then he was looking straight back to the TV which made Michael feel like shit.

Michael knew that it seemed like he was always getting mad at Ashton and knew that Ashton was getting sick of it. Michael didn’t even know what made him be like this but he knew it had to stop. He had to stop hurting Ashton like this.

On the other side of the bed Calum’s eyes were starting to fall shut as he was curled into Ashton’s side and Ashton was running his fingers down his bare back. Michael knew how comforting that touch was so it was no surprise that Calum was starting to doze off.

Michael stayed his distance from Ashton, even though he didn’t want to, but he knew they had to talk first before they did anything else.

* 

They were halfway into the movie when Michael looked over to see Calum with his mouth parted and his eyes completely shut. Ashton was starting to close his eyes too and Michael knew he had to say something before he fell asleep.

Michael got up on his elbow so that he was above Ashton then Ashton was finally looking over at him. Michael looked down at his bare chest and he just had to touch him.

He started to run his fingers over Ashton’s ribs then he trailed lower to just rub circles on his tummy and when Michael looked up he seen that Ashton had his eyes closed.

Michael got even closer and leaned down to kiss his lips. What he didn’t expect was to feel Ashton’s hand on the back of his head as he pulled him down into a deeper kiss and of course Michael kissed him back with just as much heat.

Michael kept rubbing softly at Ashton’s stomach as the boy started to kiss him slowly and moved his hand that was in his hair down to cup his cheek.

When Michael came back for air he kept his eyes closed for a few seconds then he was opening them to see Ashton looking sad again and Michael knew he had to talk.

“I’m not mad at you” he whispered as he moved his hand up to start rubbing his fingers on Ashton’s chest. Ashton swallowed hard and looked away for a brief second.

“It seemed like you were” he mumbled and Michael had never seen him look so small.

“Maybe I was a bit at first but I’m not anymore” Michael took a deep breath and leaned down to press a quick kiss to Ashton’s chest “I remember what it was like before I came out…I was fucking terrified so I don’t blame you for not wanting to tell anyone”

“So…it gets better?”

“Yeah. It does” Michael promised “People opinions start to become less and less relevant to you”

“I just feel bad” Ashton looked away and Michael kissed his jaw to get his attention back and it worked as Ashton smiled and looked back at him “I just feel bad cause I wish I could tell everyone about you guys but another part of me is so scared of what they’ll think that I just can’t”

“I know…” Michael whispered “I get it” Ashton nodded then he was looking back to Calum as he ran a hand through the sleeping boys’ hair.

“That was really nice what you did for Calum” Ashton said smiling at Michael.

“The boy loves flowers” Michael smiled back.

“That’s so cute” Ashton said kissing Calum’s forehead. Michael never got sick of seeing how gentle Ashton was with Calum.

“I wish I could just buy him all the flowers in the world” Michael found himself voicing what he had been thinking of before and Ashton looked over at him with a smirk.

“I think you just took First Place as the most sappiest” and Michael backed away from him a bit as he rolled his eyes and Ashton let out a low chuckle “I’m kidding. It’s cute” and Michael felt Ashton’s eyes on him as he watched the movie “Come here” he spoke softly this time and Michael smiled before resting his head on Ashton’s stomach. Ashton’s hand was in his hair instantly and Michael started to close his eyes at the touch.

“It’s weird…with just us three” Michael mumbled. 

“I know. He’ll be back before you know it” Ashton said tickling the hairs on the back of Michael’s neck.  
Michael wrapped his arm around Ashton’s lower stomach then he started pecking kisses to the skin on his stomach.

“I love you” Michael whispered in between kisses and he felt Ashton’s hand move from his hair to start trailing down his arm and then moving to his back as he rubbed his palm up his spine.

“I love you too”


	58. Calum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Homophobic slur in this chapter

Calum didn’t know why he was feeling so nervous as Ashton drove him back to his house. It wasn’t like he was staying there or anything; he was just stopping in to get more clothes then they were going to the mall before they would head back to Michael’s house. Calum just had this really bad feeling in his stomach as they got closer to his house and he just wanted it to go away.

Michael had said that he wanted to stay home after Ashton had called Luke to see how he was doing then him and Michael had fought over the phone. Calum remembers giggling on the couch as they kept yelling out reasons of why they needed to talk to Luke first.

Michael hadn’t stayed home because he was mad at Ashton and Calum knew that. It was just very obvious that Michael was tired and Calum knew he hadn’t gotten much sleep last night.  
He remembers feeling the bed keep moving last night and looking over Ashton to see Michael tossing and turning before he settled on his back and let out a breath as he stared up at the ceiling. Michael was just having a hard time sleeping without Luke curled up next to him and Calum just wish he could bring Luke home. It had only been a day and all three of them already missed him terribly.

“Cal” Ashton said softly and it knocked Calum out of the trance he was in. He looked down to see Ashton’s free rubbing at his thigh and the touch already had Calum calming down a bit “You feeling okay?” and Calum was about to open his mouth and lie and say that he was fine but there was no use in that. Ashton could always tell when he was sad or worried about something; not to mention that Calum needed to be comforted right now and he knew that Ashton always would.

“I’m just nervous about going home” Calum mumbled while looking down at Ashton’s hand on his thigh. He softly rubbed his fingers against Ashton’s then Ashton was holding his hand.

“Don’t be, pup” he brought Calum’s hand up to his face and kissed it a few times, making Calum get chills “We’ll be in and out of there fast” and Calum nodded. He should have known that as long as Ashton was with him he didn’t have anything to be worried about. Ashton would always keep him safe and Calum knew that.

They kept holding hands on Calum’s lap up until they were pulling in front of Calum’s house and Calum let out a breath when he seen that there was no cars in the driveway. He was only worried about his father being home but now he realized that he had stressed out about it for nothing.

Soon him and Ashton were walking hand and hand up to the house and Calum was opening the door.

His house felt so foreign to him as soon as he stepped inside and he noticed a smell of apples that he had never noticed before. He knew it really hadn’t been that long since he was home but it’s for sure been the longest period of time that he’s spent away from home. Calum led them through the living room and up the stairs. He knew that no one was home so there was no rush but he still for some reason wanted to get out of here as soon as possible.

Ashton squeezed his hand right before they got into Calum’s room and Calum held him back tighter too. They had to let go of hands as they stepped inside then Ashton was laying on his back on Calum’s bed as he held himself up by his elbows and Calum smiled. He remembered the very first time Ashton ever came to his house and Ashton painted his nails for him. Calum knew that was one moment that he wouldn’t ever forget. Calum forced himself to look away from Ashton’s smiling face to grab a big duffle bag in the back of his closet as he started to stuff clothes into it.

“Umm how much should I grab?”

“Maybe you should just grab all of it. Then you won’t ever have to come back here” Ashton laughed a bit but Calum could still sense the seriousness in his voice. Calum actually liked that idea a lot so he decided to put as much clothes as he could fit in his bag. He really didn’t have much clothes as it was so he about had all of them fit in there.

He walked into the bathroom and decided that he didn’t need to grab his toothbrush because he had been using an extra one that Michael had at his house. Calum then looked at the back of the toilet and grabbed all of his nail polishes and his whole make up bag and stuffed it into his duffle bag as well. He felt like he was moving out of his house and in a way he was. He knew that his parents probably wouldn’t even notice if he was gone. He had been staying at Michael’s house for weeks and his mother hadn’t even called him once to ask where he was . It wasn’t like Calum cared though; all he cared about these days were Luke, Ashton and Michael. They were the loves of his life and he knew that he didn’t need anyone else as long as he had them.

He started digging through the closet in his bathroom and lifted up one of the tiles on the floor to find his stash of money. Luckily a few summers ago he had made $200 form mowing people’s lawns. The money was saved for when he started college but that was coming up fast and Calum didn’t know if he would come back here before college started next fall. He stuffed the money in his bag because he knew that he wouldn’t be coming back.

When Calum got back into his bedroom Ashton was now laying on his side as his arms were under the pillow and he stared at Calum with fond eyes. Calum smiled at him then Ashton was getting up.

“You ready?” Ashton said walking over to him and Calum nodded. He was so ready to get out of here. Ashton put an arm around him and kissed him on the head before they began walking downstairs “I’m fucking starving” Ashton chuckled out as they got down to the first floor.

“Me too”

“We’ll get something at the mall” Ashton promised and Calum just held him tighter around his waist.

Calum’s happy vibe was completely gone the second the front door opened and it was before Calum even seen who it was. He started to shake and all the noise around him seemed to disappear. The only thing he could feel was Ashton’s hand rubbing at the bottom of his back.

The man in the dirty blue work clothes stepped inside then his eyes immediately landed on Calum and Calum could already feel a panic attack coming on and he swallowed hard but his throat was so dry.

“Where the hell have you been?” the older man shouted and Calum jumped but it only made Ashton hold him tighter “I asked you a question!” and Calum felt he tears began to form in his eyes. He thought he heard Ashton say something but he really wasn’t sure. He could only focus on his father in front of him.

Suddenly he felt Ashton grabbing his hand and then he was being pulled towards the door.

“I thought I told you to quit wearing that fag make-up!” and Calum squinted his eyes shut as he felt like the air was being taken from him and then he started to whimper quietly “Hey I’m talking-“ Calum didn’t know why his father had been cut off but all he knew was that Ashton was no longer next to him and he was staring down at the floor. For some reason Calum made himself look up and he widened his eyes at what he saw.

Ashton had his arm against his fathers’ chest as he had him pinned against the wall and Calum had never seen Ashton look so angry. He had never seen this side of him before.

“You say one more fucking word to him and I swear I’ll break your neck” Calum heard Ashton say through gritted teeth and at his point Calum was shaking from crying so bad. Just being his fathers’ presence was making him like this and he just wanted it to end. His father actually looked scared as he looked up and nodded his head at Ashton then Ashton was taking his arm away and walking back to Calum.

Calum seen Ashton’s anger on his face flash away in a second as a soft and worried look came over his face. Ashton was then putting an arm tightly around Calum’s shoulders as he held the boy to his chest and walked them quickly out of the house.

As soon as they were in the fresh air Calum could breathe a bit better but he was still whimpering into Ashton’s chest and Ashton kept rubbing his hand through his hair and seemed to walk even faster to the car. Ashton was helping Calum get into the passenger seat then he was running over to the driver’s side before getting inside.

Ashton instantly moved the middle consol up in the car and scooted over to be right next to Calum as he wrapped his arms around him and brought the boy back into his chest. Calum started to cry even more when Ashton started holding him like this. He was just so relieved to be out of there and so happy that he had this wonderful person in his life. He still didn’t know how he got so lucky. Ashton rubbed at his back and was constantly touching Calum everywhere just reminding the boy that he was here and that he was safe.

“Shhhh” Ashton started to rock Calum and Calum held him tighter “I’ve got you baby. I’ve got you” he kept repeating those words as he kissed Calum all over his hair and put his hands under his jacket and sweater to rub at his bare skin. Calum loved the skin to skin contact and Ashton knew that “I promise I’m never gonna let you go through something like that again” and Calum nodded. He knew Ashton would keep that promise “You’re just gonna stay with me, Luke and Michael okay?” Calum nodded again; he decided right then and there that he would never go back to his house. He didn’t need to “I’m going to keep you safe…I p-promise” and Ashton’s voice sounded so weak and Calum swore that he was crying but he hoped he wasn’t. He didn’t ever want Ashton to cry or be sad.

Ashton let out a shaky breath and then he was moving his one hand that was on Calum’s back to put it on Calum’s neck as he moved back just a little to start peppering kissing all over the side of Calum’s face and Calum still kept his eyes shut as he did that.  
Calum finally felt the tears begin to stop the longer that Ashton held him and kissed him, making him feel the most loved he’s ever felt.

“I l-love you” Calum whimpered out and he wiped his eyes on Ashton’s coat and Ashton was letting out another shaky breath.

“I love you too, baby” Ashton started to put kisses on Calum’s forehead and temple as he moved his hand to rub at his cheek “So so much” he whispered as he rested their foreheads together and stared at Calum in the eye. Calum felt himself getting close to tears once again but instead just leaned forward to kiss Ashton’s lips. Ashton kissed him back just as softly and put both hands on his cheeks as he made Calum feel even more loved “You’re so beautiful” Ashton whispered against his lips and kissed him again “My beautiful boy” he said pressing kisses up his jaw and then he was backing up a bit to look at Calum again “And don’t let anyone ever tell you any different” and Calum nodded as he closed his eyes again.


	59. Michael

Michael was laying on his bed with his computer on his lap as he impatiently tapped on it just waiting for a face to appear on the other side.

Sure he had talked to Luke on the phone earlier in the day but it was now getting dark out and he just wanted to see Luke’s beautiful face. He had texted the boy asking if he could skype him and luckily Luke said that he could and he was alone in the hotel room while his parents were off at some party.

Suddenly Luke was appearing on the screen and Michael instantly smiled. The boy was laying on his back with the computer on his tummy as he covered up with a blanket.

“Hi” Michael said he didn’t know why he was feeling nervous; it was just Luke.

“Hi yourself” Luke smiled and Michael felt a warmness at hearing Luke’s voice again and seeing his face.

“You having fun down there?” and Michael really hoped he was. He didn’t want Luke being miserable like he had been.

“Yeah” Luke chuckled a bit “Swimming in the ocean is really fun and I’ve gotten a tan a little…” Luke was then lifting up his shirt and showing Michael his tan lines and Michael nodded, trying not to get too worked up over just seeing that little amount of skin.

“I bet the weather is amazing”

“It really is…still wish you guys were here though” he frowned a bit and Michael didn’t want that.

“You’ll be home in a couple days” he said quietly and then Luke was looking up again.

“Where’s Cal and Ash?”

“They went to Calum’s house so he could get more clothes then they said they were going to the mall” he shrugged.

“You didn’t wanna go?”

“I’m really tired” and Michael rubbed at his eyes “Didn’t get much sleep last night”

“Why not?” Luke asked with a concerned tone.

“I don’t know…” Michael said shyly as he looked down but he did know why he couldn’t sleep “It’s just hard sleeping without you next to me” he said honestly and he knew that if Luke was there with him he would be putting his fingers under Michael’s chin and making him look up so he looked back at the screen to see Luke looking sad and he didn’t want that “I’m fine though really” but he knew that Luke knew he was lying as he shook his head and looked away.

“I miss you so much” Luke mumbled out and God, Michael just wanted to hold him so badly.

“Miss you too baby” and Michael actually found himself reaching a hand towards the screen but then he put his hand back on his lap as he let out a frustrated sigh.

“I wish I could touch you too” Luke said like he knew why Michael just did what he did and Michael just nodded.

“Wish I could kiss you and touch you all over” Michael said biting his lip and looking back up at Luke.

“Fuck” Luke leaned his head back as he was getting frustrated

“Haven’t gotten myself off at all since I’ve been here”

“Why? Did you forget how?” Michael teased and Luke looked like he was about to shake his head but then he was smirking.

“Yeah” Luke nodded as rubbed his tongue on the inside of his cheek “You might have to remind me” Luke took the computer off his lap and set it on the bed right next to him so he could pull his patns off and Michael let out a whimper.

“You’re gonna kill me, Luke”

“Just pretend that you’re touching me” Luke said in a weak tone as he began to rub at his dick that was still trapped under his boxers. Michael watched Luke’s hand start to move a bit faster and looked up to see the boy with his mouth open as he let out little desperate sounds.

“Wanna see that pretty dick of yours, baby” Michael said in a low voice and then Luke was nodding before he looked down to start pulling his boxers off. His hard dick sprung out and Michael already knew that he was hard himself just from seeing Luke touch himself.

Luke started to get a steady pace pumping on his dick and it was killing Michael.

“Feels good to touch yourself huh?”

“Y-yeah...so good” Luke sped up his hand “Not as good as your hand would feel though….fuck Michael” and then Luke was taking his head off the pillow and looking straight at Michael “Wanna see you touch yourself too” and Michael didn’t need to be told twice. He nodded then set his computer on the bed before he started to take his sweat pants down as he rubbed against his dick under his boxers for a few seconds before taking off his boxers too. Luke moaned at the sight of Michael’s dick and Michael bit his lip and looked straight at Luke as he began to jerk himself off.

Michael gasped when he watched Luke’s other hand go past his dick as he began to play with his balls and he let out a loud moan at the touch in a different area.

Luke rubbed at his balls for a few more seconds before he was roaming his fingers down lower and then he was rubbing at his hole causing a shot of pleasure go through Michael’s body and he knew he was already so close.

“You gonna finger yourself for me?” and Luke closed his eyes as he nodded and moved his fingers up to start sucking on them and making them wet before he began to stick his finger in his hole. Michael watched him rub his finger around once it was inside him and he wanted to be the one doing that so badly.

“It feels so fucking good, Michael…want you to fuck me so bad” Luke whimpered out as he sped up the movement of his fingers and kept a steady pace on his dick.

“I will baby…” Michael promised “When you get back I will and I'll make you feel so good” Luke moaned loudly at that and then he was sticking a second finger in.

“Oh…oh my god” and Luke moaned loudly again and Michael sped up the pace of his own hand as he kept letting out weak whimpers “Michael I’m gonna come”

“Yeah” Michal nodded as he moved his hand up to start rubbing his thumb around his slit, making him whine “Want you to come first baby” and just like that Luke was coming all over his stomach and Michael didn’t last much longer himself after that.

“Holy shit” Michael breathed out as he was now on his side and had his boxers back on as he panted. He pulled the computer closer to him so that it was right in front of his face then Luke was doing that same thing.

“Kinda feels like you’re here with me” Luke said sadly as he pulled the blanket up to his chin.

“It does…” and Michael gritted his jaw before taking a deep breath. 

“I’ll be with you soon though" 

“M’ really sleepy Michael” Luke mumbled as his eyes started to fall a bit.

“You can sleep…I’ll stay here with you” he watched as Luke smiled then rubbed his face on his pillow before closing his eyes completely.

“I love you,Michael” he whispered.

“I love you too, angel” and Michael heard Luke let out a content sigh as he snuggled into the pillow again.

“Mmm…I love when you call me that” he spoke quietly, never opening his eyes. Michael loved calling him that too. It was so fitting and he only started to let his eyes close when he couldn’t keep them open any longer. He had only gotten a few hours of sleep last night and he never took a nap so the lack of sleep was catching up with him. He remembers mumbling another “I love you’ right before he started to doze off.


	60. Ashton

Ashton and Calum were feeling so full of Chinese food as they stepped inside of Michael’s house and they were also feeling incredibly tired.

“I’m so full” Ashton groaned as he walked towards the couch and Calum wondered what he was doing since when they were in the car they talked about how much they both wanted to go straight to bed and sleep forever “I’m never eating ever again” he was then falling face down into the couch and Calum giggled.

“Ash” he whined as he walked over to him and then started to brush his fingers through Ashton’s curly hair “Aren’t you coming upstairs?”

“You’re gonna have to carry me” and Calum giggled at that.  
Suddenly Ashton was flipping over so that he was laying on his back then he was pulling Calum on top of him and Calum laughed as he instantly snuggled into Ashton’s neck. He let out a content sigh when he felt Ashton’s big hands trailing up and down his back.

“This is really comfy” Ashton mumbled tiredly against his hair before kissing it a few time and Calum nodded as he agreed “We could just sleep here” and it seemed like Calum was considering it

“Michael would get lonely though…and I miss him” Calum admitted and Ashton had to agree with that

“Yeah I do too…damn it” Ashton groaned and Calum giggled into his neck before he gave it a few kissed and them moved up to peck Ashton’s lips.

*

Calum rounded the corner into Michael’s room before Ashton then Ashton seen him stopping in the doorway

“What-“ then Ashton was stopping too and standing next to Calum “That’s so cute” he whispered as he quietly laughed and Calum nodded, not being able to stop smiling. From here they could see Michael on his side and the computer next to his face as Luke was also asleep on the computer screen. Ashton started to walk into the room so Calum did too. Ashton slipped in right behind Michael and then he rubbed his hand up Michael’s arm as he closed his eyes and gave him pecks on the cheek. Michael still didn’t move at all and then Ashton felt Calum sliding in behind him as he rested his chin on his arm, looking at the sleeping Luke on the computer screen. Ashton chuckled then looked where Calum was looking.

“Luke” Ashton said quietly as he had an arm wrapped around Michael’s waist and the blond started to move a bit on the screen “Lukey you awake?” Ashton really hated waking him up but he just really wanted to hear the boys’ voice.

“Hmm?” Luke mumbled as he pushed his face into the pillow and then his eyes started to flicker open “A-Ash” Luke smiled as his voice sounded rough from sleep and then the blond grabbed the computer and laid on his back as he rested the computer on his bare stomach. Ashton laid on his back too and Calum snuggled against his chest before Ashton was putting the computer on his stomach as well. “Hey, Cal” Luke smiled at the boy.

“Hi, Luke” Calum said shyly as he pulled the blanket up to his chin and Ashton chuckled before kissing his head.

“Looks like you got some color” Ashton chuckled at seeing some red underneath Luke’s eyes.

“Yeah the beaches here are amazing. Wish you guys could be here”

“Someday” Ashton smiled to himself thinking about how great it would be to go on vacation with these three boys.

“Has it been cold there?” Luke asked while putting his arm over his head and looking more comfortable.

“Yeah it’s been pretty damn cold. We went to the winter Carnival though” and Ashton tried not to seem too depressed when he mentioned it. He just felt bad for how he didn’t even try to tell Connor that he was gay when his boyfriends were right there and he felt like he acted like a bit of an asshole.

“Yeah? Was it fun?” Luke said sitting up a bit and seeming more awake now.

“Yeah” Ashton forced a smile while he looked down at his chest but then he was looking to Calum and rubbing a hand through his hair “Tell Luke what Michael got you” he said softly and Calum instantly smiled.

“He got me flowers” Calum said quietly as he looked at Luke on the screen and Luke smiled wide as he rubbed at his hair a bit.

“That’s adorable” he giggled and then Calum was starting to sit up a bit.

“Do you wanna see them?” Calum said getting excited and Luke instantly nodded.

“Yeah I wanna see them” and then Calum was giving Ashton a quick kiss on the cheek before he was getting off the bed and walking towards the hallway in just his boxers and Ashton couldn’t wipe the fond smile off his face as he left the room.

“Are you okay Ash?” Luke suddenly said once he knew Calum was gone and it caught Ashton off guard.

“Hmm?” he said quickly then he seen Luke’s worried look “Oh. Yeah. I’m fine” and he knew that didn’t sound very believable.

“Did something happen today?” Luke said softly and Ashton let out a breath as he ran a hand through his hair. He still couldn’t get Calum’s terrified face out of his head when his father walked in the door and he hated seeing the boy go through that.

“Y-yeah” Ashton pressed his lips together and still continued to look down. He knew that if Luke was here he would be trying to comfort him and god, did Ashton need that right now.

“Ash” Luke whispered and Ashton looked up to see the boy’s eyes moving all over.

“Calum’s dad is a monster” Ashton managed to get out. He always thought that his own dad was terrible but his dad was a saint compared to Calum’s.

“What happened?”

“We went over to get more clothes from Calum’s house and his dad came in the front door and just immediately started yelling at him and-“ Ashton took a deep breath and flexed his jaw as he looked down, hoping that Luke couldn’t see his eyes starting to glaze over “and Calum just looked so terrified and hurt…I couldn’t fucking stand seeing him like that and then I started thinking about how Calum had to go through that for all these years” Ashton squeezed his eyes shut with his thumb and his index finger, trying to stop the tears “I just wish I could have been there for him sooner”

“A-ash” Luke said weakly and Ashton finally looked up to see Luke rubbing at one of his eyes. He looked so sad and now Ashton felt even worse than before. He shouldn’t have put this on Luke right now or even ever. He was glad that Luke and Michael didn’t have to see Calum so hurt like that but now he was telling Luke about it and making him feel bad about it too “Ash you’re here for him now and that’s all that matters okay?” and Ashton nodded slowly “You’re such a good person and Calum knows that; he knows you’ll always be there for him” and Ashton closed his eyes again as he looked to the empty doorway; already missing Calum.

“I really miss you, you know that?” Ashton said with a slight chuckle; Luke was amazing and somehow made him feel better about this whole situation.

“I miss you too, Ashy” then Luke was sinking down in his bed a bit “And it’s really hard falling asleep alone when you’re used to being cuddled by three other people”

“I know” Ashton said softly “Just a few more days, baby”

Calum was coming through the door a few seconds later with the glass of flowers in his hand and a big smile on his face.

“They’re still looking good” Ashton said as he Calum was sitting on the edge of the bed and touching the petals. He was sitting close to Ashton so his leg was touching his side and Ashton always loved how Calum needed to be touching him in some way and Ashton started to rub his fingers on Calum’s thigh and seen the boy smile. Calum was then putting the flowers up to the screen so Luke could see them better.

“They’re beautiful, Cal” Luke said with a big smile and Calum looked so happy as he kept looking from Luke and then back to the flowers.

“Thank you” he said shyly and then he was setting them on the nightstand and cuddling back into Ashton’s chest and Ashton seen him start to close his eyes. Luke yawned on the screen and Ashton realized how tired they all were. It was close to midnight by now and him and Calum had a long day and he was sure that Luke had too.

“I don’t wanna go but I’m gonna pass out if I don’t” Luke chuckled and Ashton was already nodding.

“Get some sleep, Lukey. We’ll talk tomorrow” Luke seemed like he was forcing his eyes to stay open as he nodded.

“I love you guys”

“Love you too” Calum and Ashton said at the same time which caused them to giggle and then Luke’s smile was fading a bit.

“God, I wish I was there” he said quietly and Ashton really started to get sad again.

“Me too” Ashton whispered and he felt Calum nodding against him and he started brushing his hand through the boys’ hair.

*

Once the laptop was closed and on the desk next to him Ashton already felt himself missing the boy even more. He realized that they would have to Skype Luke a lot more until he was back here with them. Calum started to grab the blankets and pull them over the both of them as he leaned up a bit to kiss at Ashton’s neck and Ashton started trailing his fingers down his back.

“Night, Ash” Calum said sleepily as Ashton could feel his eyelashes flutter on his skin. Ashton moved his hand to the back of Calum’s head and pressed a kiss on his forehead.

“Goodnight baby” he whispered against his skin “I love you very much” and Calum tightened the arm that was wrapped around Ashton’s waist.

“I love you too” he spoke quietly as he started pressing kisses on Ashton’s chest and moved up to his neck “S-so much” and Ashton squinted his eyes shut again. He had no idea why he was so emotional tonight but he didn’t even care anymore. He held Calum tighter and started putting his hand all over his back, feeling Calum’s eyes begin to close.

*

Ashton kept just laying there awake well after he knew Calum was asleep then he was looking over at Michael who still wasn’t facing him and he wished that Michael was cuddled up against him too. He used his other hand to start trailing his fingers up and down Michael’s arm and back, just needing to touch him.  
He didn’t exactly want to disrupt Michael’s sleep but he felt himself getting happier when the boy started to move a bit then he was letting out a small whimper into his pillow. Ashton moved his hand from the boys’ back to start carding it through his hair and Michael let out a little “mmm” sound.

“Come snuggle with me” Ashton whispered and he seen that Michael never opened his eyes “Michael” he whined as he still ran his fingers through the blue hair. Michael was then letting out a little grunt and scooting closer to Ashton as he rested his head on Ashton’s shoulder and still laid on his stomach, still looking facing away from Ashton. Ashton wrapped one arm around him so that his hand was resting on Michael’s arm and Michael let out a breath. Ashton could tell how tired he was and he felt bad for waking him up “Night” he said before pressing a kiss to Michael’s head and he felt Michael smile then he was putting a hand on Ashton’s arm as he dragged his fingers along it and hummed a little “Are you still mad at me?” and Ashton hated how weak he sounded but he couldn’t help it.

“I told you I wasn’t” Michael said in a grumpy voice and that didn’t exactly make Ashton feel any better.

“Tell me you love me then” Ashton said with his lips against Michael’s hair. Michael let out a breath and Ashton was scared he had upset him but then Michael was kissing his shoulder and burrowing his face into his neck.

“I love you…you know how much I do”

“I love you too” he said before kissing Michael’s head again and Michael pressed a kiss to his neck “I was thinking of going to the mall tomorrow again. There was something I wanted to pick up for Calum but will you come with us this time?”

“You just want me to go so I can distract Calum” Michael mumbled and Ashton instantly shook his head.

“No. I want you to come cause I like having you around…and I just hate leaving you here by yourself”

“Okay” Ashton felt Michael’s warm breath on his skin and he felt better knowing that Michael was coming with them tomorrow. They really hadn’t done anything fun since Luke left and Ashton needed to see that happy smile on Michael’s face again.


	61. Michael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is literally all smut lmao let me know what you think!

“Did I get it all?” Michael said rotating so Calum could see the back of his hair and then the front again. Calum nodded and smiled from his spot on top of the counter as he sat with his hands in his lap.

They were in the bathroom while Ashton drove back to his house quickly to get more money before they headed off to the mall. Ashton would have just stopped at his house on the way to the mall but it was out of the way and also Michael claimed that he “needed” to do something before they left; that need being dying his hair since he had blue hair for long enough.

Michael scrubbed the dye into his hair a bit more in the front before he was letting out a breath and rinsing his hands off a bit in the sink that was next to Calum.

“Do you know what Ashton is getting for me at the mall?” Calum said softly and Michael looked up and dried his hands to see Calum biting at his lip curiously.

“I do” Michael smirked at him and Calum always blushed when he smiled at him.

“Can you at least give me a hint?” and Calum made sure to put on his best puppy face, knowing it drove all three of the boys crazy, but Michael forced himself not to give in.

“Nope” he said standing in between Calum’s legs that were dangling off the counter, not touching the floor “My lips are sealed” he said as he kissed Calum softly and Calum instantly wrapped his arms around the boys’ shoulders and brought him closer. Michael let out a small moan and held Calum’s hips as he deepened the kiss and then moved his face to start kissing up and down Calum’s jaw, making the boy whimper.

Michael backed up to give Calum’s forehead a kiss then kept his lips there for a few seconds before pulling back and looking Calum in the eye again as he put his hands on the counter to hold himself up. Calum opened his mouth a few times, seeming like he wanted to say something and Michael smiled in hopes of encouraging him to say what was on his mind.

“Michael, can I ask you something?” he said as he looked down to the floor and Michael put two fingers under his chin to make the shy boy look up at him then he nodded.

“Yeah, ask away”

“Umm…” Calum still seemed nervous but this time he kept his eyes on Michael “Why aren’t your parents ever home?” and Michael should have seen that one coming. Ashton, Luke and Calum had basically been living at his house for the past month but they had never once seen his parents.

“Well…” Michael took a deep breath “Both my parents have jobs that require them to travel a lot; they basically live out of hotels. I see them sometimes but they never stick around for too long” he shrugged, acting like it was no big deal because he always acted like it didn’t bother him.

“Do you wish they were around more?”

“Maybe sometimes” Michael admitted “But for the most part I’m happy I always have the house to myself. Besides…I’ve got you, Luke and Ash now so I don’t need anyone else” Calum smiled at that and looked down to start rubbing his hand up and down Michael’s chest, just wanting to touch him. Michael stepped even closer so Calum could touch him without straining his arm.

“How long do you have to keep the dye in your hair?” Calum asked but he still didn’t tear his eyes away from his hand that was roaming on Michael’s torso.

“About 10 more minutes” Michael said swallowing hard and he watched as Calum’s hand moved under the old shirt he had on to rub at his bare skin as he started to use his nails a bit and Michael tensed up, feeling himself already getting hard from when Calum trailed his fingers down even lower to rub at the skin just above the top of his jeans.

Calum hummed a bit like he was thinking about something then he using both of his hands on Michael as he rubbed up his sides.

“What’re you thinking about, baby?” Michael smirked and even though Calum wasn’t looking up at him he knew the boy could hear the smirk in his voice as his face reddened.

“Can…” Calum began as he bit at his lip then he was moving his hand to palm at Michael’s hard dick and Michael grinded into his hand and let out a breathy moan

“Can I put my mouth on you?” this time Calum looked right up at Michael and looked like he was begging for his dick as he fluttered his eyelashes. Michael had never heard anyone sound so innocent and cute while asking if they could give him a blowjob and he couldn’t believe how amazing Calum was.

“Yeah” Michael nodded quickly as he brushed some hair off of Calum’s forehead then Calum was smiling wide without showing his teeth.

Only a minute went by of Calum palming Michael through his jeans before he was unzipping his pants and then pulling them down Michael’s thighs. Michael had never had Calum be so in control and seem so desperate and he loved it. He loved seeing Calum licking his lips and not being able to keep his hands off him as he started pull down his boxers.

Calum was then getting off the counter and Michael backed up a step. He watched as Calum got down on his knees in front of him and Michael had never seen such a beautiful view. He moaned out and flexed his hands that were still gripping the counter as a way to not fall over as Calum started to pump a hand on him and started licking his lips again.

“Michael?” Calum suddenly said and Michael opened his eyes to look down at the boy.

“Y-yeah?” he already sounded so fucked out.

“Can you tell me what to do?” and suddenly Michael felt bad. He was sure that Calum had done this before with Ashton but he guessed he was wrong.

“Fuck, Cal. I just thought that you’d done this before and-“

“I have” Calum smirked…he had actually smirked and Michael had no idea what was going on “It’s not that. I just want you to control what I do…please?” and it was then that Michael understood and his mouth dropped open. Calum wanted him to boss him around. He knew Calum wasn’t as innocent as he led on and he smiled.

“Fuck, you’re incredible” Michael chuckled a bit as he felt out of breath already “So you want me to boss you around, baby?” and Calum nodded quickly and smiled as if Michael had just offered to buy the boy ice cream or something “Open your mouth” Michael put on his best demanding voice and Calum shivered in excitement of what was to come as he did what he was told “Tongue out” and Calum stuck his tongue out flat as it nearly touched the bottom of his chin. Michael just started out slow as he rubbed his dick back and forth on Calum’s tongue and he already felt like his legs were about to give out. Calum was closing his eyes and he moved his hands up to grip at Michael’s thighs.

After a minute or two of that Michael noticed that Calum was starting to look desperate as he was pulling on Michael’s thighs like he needed more.

“You want me to fuck your mouth baby? Is that what you want?” and Calum moaned as he nodded and Michael really couldn’t believe this was happening. He took his dick off of Calum’s tongue then he instructed the boy to put his tongue in his mouth.

Michael only waited a few more seconds to start guiding his dick slowly into Calum’s mouth. He moved his hand off his dick and then moved it to the back of Calum’s head as he pulled on the hair a bit and he watched as Calum’s eyes seemed to roll back in his head before he let his lids close

“You ready?” and Calum nodded a “yes” the best he could and Michael couldn’t wait any longer. He gripped onto Calum’s hair and pulled the boy closer to him as his dick was being swallowed down more and he let out a loud moan as his head fell back. It already felt so good and it had been so long since he had fucked someone’s mouth.

Michael moved Calum’s head back then forward in a fast motion this time and Michael already felt so close to coming down his throat

“You feel so fucking good, Cal. Such a good boy for me” he praised and he heard Calum whimper as he closed his lips harder on Michael’s dick “Y-yeah…just like that baby” Michael moaned out when Calum sucked harder and started to use his tongue a bit.

Michael began to tug harder at Calum’s hair as he started to move the boys’ head even faster and began to deep throat him. Michael stopped abruptly when he heard Calum choke and he looked down at him.

“Shit, cal. I’m sorry” Calum just moaned and closed his eyes again as he moved back a little to just start sucking on the tip and then he was pulling off completely and looking up at Michael with pleading eyes as his chest moved up and down quickly.

“Please don’t stop” he begged and Michael felt his dick twitch.

“O-okay” he only managed to whisper “I just felt bad cause I choked you…it just felt so good that I got out of control”

“It’s okay” Calum smiled a bit “I liked it” and Michael felt that warm feeling in his stomach at Calum’s words.

“Fuck” he said loudly once Calum was sucking on his dick again and then he was put his hand on the back of Calum’s head as he started to move the boys’ lips on his dick again.

He started to deep throat him only a few seconds later and he made the boy choke again and almost stopped but then Calum was moaning around him, sending a jolt of pleasure through his body.

“You just love my dick, don’t you baby?” Michael growled out when he thrusting fast into the boys’ mouth and Calum just let out another moan that made him shiver “You take my dick so fucking good…doing so good baby boy” and Calum whimpered at the nickname and then he was looking up at Michael who was looking down at him as he bit at his lip.

Michael felt himself getting close again and then he felt Calum’s nails digging into his thighs as he started sucking hard again and Michael was so gone. 

He was saying Calum’s name over and over ending them in whimpers as he came and felt like he could come again as he heard Calum gulp hard as he swallowed it all down. Michael was then stepping back and taking his dick out of Calum’s mouth when he became too sensitive

“F-fuck…oh fuck” Michael whispered, as his eyes were still closed and he felt Calum’s face rest against his thigh. He opened his eyes to see the boy gazing up at him like he was silently saying “thank you” and Michael knew it was him who should be saying thank you. He was still shaking from how amazing his orgasm was “Fuck that was so good, Cal” and Calum just smiled up at him before pressing a kiss to his thigh. 

“Wow” and Michael quickly turned around at hearing someone chuckle. His heart jumped into his throat as he seen Ashton leaning against the doorway with his coat still on and his hands in his pockets.

Michael looked back to Calum to help the boy up then he was pulling his boxers and pants back up, feeling slightly embarrassed. He really shouldn’t have felt embarrassed from Ashton catching them doing this but he did for some reason. 

“That was quite the sight” Ashton chuckled again then he was walking into the bathroom with a cocky stride.

“How…how long were you standing there?” Michael asked making eye contact with Ashton; still feeling shy from what the boy had just witnessed.

“Long enough” Ashton smiled then he was glancing back to Calum “Don’t you think you should return the favor?”

“Of course” and Michael already planned on doing that before he had seen Ashton “Just give us a second” Michael said urging Ashton to leave for a few minutes but Ashton just smirked again and shook his head.

“I wanna watch” and now it was Michael’s turn to smirk.

“Ashton Irwin…I never pegged you for a voyeur”

“Can’t help it” Ashton shrugged and Michael looked over to see Calum looking impatient as he sat on the counter again. Michael did just think about sucking Calum off but then he was reminded of how much the boy loved having his ass touched.

“Stand up and turn around for me, baby” Michael said patting his thigh and Calum quickly did what he was told. He faced the mirror then put both hands on the counter and Michael pulled his jeans and boxers down in one pull as they pooled at his feet.

Michael instantly used both of his hands to rub harshly at Calum’s ass cheeks and the boy already began to moan. Michael glanced over to see Ashton leaning against the counter with his arms over his chest as he bit at his lip and looked at Calum’s face. Ashton must have felt Michael’s eyes on him because he was looking at Michael and Michael smiled at him before he started to rub his finger in a circle on Calum’s hole.

Michael decided to stop teasing him and then he was taking one hand off of Calum’s cheek and putting it up to his face. 

“Suck” he demanded like he had before when Calum was about to suck him off and then Calum was sucking and coating his fingers with his spit as he swirled his tongue around.

Michael pulled his hand back, knowing that Calum just wanted to come and then he was circling one fingers around the hole before pressing in and he heard Calum let suck in a breath and then he was letting it out with a moan once Michael started to push his finger in more. 

“You ready for more?” and he looked up to see Calum nodding quickly. Michael pressed another finger into him and then began to scissor him harshly as he felt Calum shaking. He leaned forward and began kissing Calum’s back and shoulder as he moved his other hand to massage at his scalp. Michael was then pulling at Calum’s hair a bit as he pulled his head back slightly then started putting kisses on his cheek and any other place he could reach on the boys’ face.

Calum let out a loud moan when Michael added a third finger then was reaching a spot that him shaking. Michael kept hitting his prostate over and over as Calum let out whimpers every time he thrusted into him then he started biting at the side of Calum’s neck.

“Mmmm…You gonna come for me sweetheart?” and he felt Calum shiver once again then he was nodding.

Soon Calum was coming completely untouched as he came all over the tile floor and Michael pushed his fingers into the boy a couple more times before he was slowly taking them out. Michael wrapped both arms around Calum’s torso and held him up, knowing the boy was feeling week as he panted and was still shaking a bit. He kissed his shoulder a few times and began rubbing one hand on his stomach.

Michael all of a sudden remembered that Ashton was standing next to them and he looked to see the curly haired boy with his face beat red and he kept looking between the two boys’.

“You alright?” Michael asked seriously as he glanced down to see Ashton clearly hard in his tight black jeans.

“Y-yeah” he nodded but he was biting on his lip now.

“Want me to take care of you too?” Michael smiled.

“We umm…we gotta get going” he shook his head “The mall is closing soon”

“You sure? Cause I will. I’m pretty sure it will only take a few minutes”

“O-okay” Ashton nodded and Michael smiled and kissed Calum’s head once more before he was walking up to Ashton and quickly pulling his pants and boxers down.

With how close Ashton probably already was Michael decided to just give him a handjob as he quickly started pumping a hand on him as he used the other hand to rub his balls between his fingers. He felt Ashton let out a breath and then his head was falling on Michael’s shoulder as he wrapped one arm around Michael’s torso.

Within minutes Ashton was coming all over his hand and Michael pressed a few kissed to his head before he stood back and kissed his lips.


	62. Calum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a feeling you guys will like these next 2 chapters ;) let me know what you think!

They had gone to a couple of stores in the mall and were now walking towards some of the more “girly stores but Calum still couldn’t stop thinking of what had happened in the bathroom.

He didn’t even know what came over him when he asked Michael to be controlling with him but he decided it was another thing that he really liked. Even though it didn’t last long he also really liked seeing Michael make Ashton feel good too. New things were happening and Calum hoped they would try more new things cause it was so exciting to him.

He was walking in between Michael and Ashton as they kept looking around at the stores.

A few minutes ago Ashton had went into a store without Michael and Calum and Calum just knew that Ashton was getting him his present for Christmas.

Of course Calum wanted to get them all something too and he hoped to pick up at least one of the things today since Christmas was only a few days away and time was running out.

Even though Luke wasn’t going to be here for Christmas Calum still planned on getting him something and he already missed hearing the boys’ voice even though he heard it this morning when they all talked to him after breakfast.

Suddenly Ashton’s phone was ringing and Calum looked over to see Ashton looking down strangly at his phone before looking back up.

“It’s my sister” he said in a confused voice “I gotta get this guys…You can go in there without me” Ashton said nodding towards the store that Michael was talking about going into and both of the boys nodded before giving him his privacy.

They were soon walking into this nice clothing store that had some jean jacket that Michael really wanted and Calum followed him into the guys section of the store.

“Here it is!” Michael said suddenly and he was walking over to the wall and reaching up to pull a jean jacket down that had a bunch of patches on it. It was so Michael and Calum thought he would look so hot with it on; he looked hot in everything. He watched as Michael slipped it on and then he was smiling wide as he watched Michael look at himself in the mirror. He flattended it out a bit and fixed the collar before he was facing Calum again “Isn’t it cool?”

“Yeah” Calum smiled sweetly “It looks really good on you”

“Thank you” he said proudly then he was tugging on it a bit “It’s a bit small for me but I’m gonna go ask if they have any other sizes. You can come with or you can look around?” and Calum looked around a bit and decided with the 2nd choice.

“I’ll look around” Calum smiled and Michael returned it before disappearing towards the front counter.

Calum began to look at some of the guys clothing around him but honestly nothing seemed to suit him. They were all dark colors and Calum always liked pastels and pretty colors. Calum bit at his lip a bit and started to scan the other side of the store. It was the girls section but he found himself liking the stuff over there so much more.

He looked to see Michael now talking to some girl behind the counter and then he looked back to the girls section before making his way towards it.

He started to put his fingers against this soft peach sweater that had a flower on it and he thought it was so pretty. He felt like it would look good with his skin tone then he seen the price and decided to move on. Today wasn’t about him anyways; he was supposed to be looking for stuff for his boyfriends so Calum had no idea why he was even looking at stuff for himself.

He looked back to see Michael still at the counter so he figured there was no harm in looking since Michael was still busy.

He started to walk into the section that had stuff like skirts and dressed and he loved all of them honestly. He had never worn a dress or a skirt, not feeling brave enough, but one day he hoped he was because he knew he would feel great in them.

Calum froze a bit when he looked straight ahead and seen that it was the lingerie section. He swallowed hard and felt embarrassed for even looking from a distance but he couldn’t help it.

From here he could see all dark colors of bras and panties and then on the other side were more light colors. Usually he liked the more soft colors but when he can to lingerie he always liked the deep reds and blacks.

Calum bit at his lip and just went for it. It wasn’t like the store was even that busy and he just hoped no one would judge him. He made his way towards the bra section and just ran his fingers across a few of them before he made it to the panties. He felt himself smiling at picturing himself in a pair of the dark blue ones he had between his fingers but they still didn’t seem like the right color for him.

He moved on to the next rack of them and seen some dark pink ones with flowers lining the top of them. He liked them but yet again the color didn’t seem to suit him.

Calum kept walking and finally his eyes landed on a pair of dark red panties with frills around the crotch of them and he got closer to touch them. They were silky and so soft and Calum turned them around to see that they were thongs. He loved them and couldn’t take his eyes off of the material.

It was very rare that Calum ever felt pretty but he knew he would feel confident in these panties. He had wanted a pair for so long and these ones were literally perfect.

“Whatcha lookin’ at?” said a voice behind him and Calum felt scared at first but then he felt comforting arms wrap around him and felt lips going over the back of his neck.

“Nothing” Calum said shyly as he let the panties fall from his fingers.

“Nothing huh?” Michael teased as he tickled Calum’s sides a bit and Calum giggled. God, he loved Michael so much “Those would look so sexy on you…you know that?”

“Really?” Calum said turning his head to look at Michael and he watched the boy nod with a smile on his face.

“And I’m buying them for you” Michael said quickly as he took them off the rack and Calum turned around to look at him fully.

“Michael, you don’t have to” Calum said feeling bad because these boys have already done so much for him.

“Do you like them?” Michael said as he raised his eyebrows.

“Yeah” Calum said straight away “I love them”

“Then I’m getting them for you” Michael smirked and Calum let out a breath. He then took the tag from the panties and looked at the price.

“Michael, they’re $40…I can’t-I can’t ask you to buy them for me. I mean I have money I can-“Michael cut him off by pressing his lips to Calum’s then he gave his jaw a few kissed and Calum closed his eyes.

“If I buy them for you then that gives me the right to tell you to wear them whenever I want” Michael smirked and then he was rubbing a hand through the front of Calum’s hair “Besides…I like spoiling you” and Calum knew he was blushing as he felt the butterflies in his stomach. He couldn’t help but get closer and wrap his arms around Michael as he kissed his neck.

“I love you” he said as he held Michael tighter.

“I love you too” Michael kissed the top of his head.

“But what about your jacket?” Calum said backing up to look at him and Michael shrugged.

“They don’t have my size right now anyways” and Calum sighed a bit, feeling bad again “It’s okay. I’ll like these panties just as much as you do…trust me” he smiled wide and Calum giggled feeling shy again as he leaned forward and nuzzled into Michael’s neck.

*

They were checking out at the counter as Michael insisted that Calum needed some red nail polish to match them and Calum leaned against him as the girl scanned their stuff. He felt Michael rub at his back soothingly and Calum was starting to feel sleepy.

“Getting these for you girlfriend?” the girl behind the counter suddenly said and Calum felt his stomach turn a bit. He hated when workers got nosey like that and he didn’t know how Michael would react. He looked up to see the now pastel pink haired boy smiling a bit then looking back up at the girl.

“No they’re for my boyfriend actually” and Calum started to get nervous. Growing up with an extremely homophobic father made him think that mostly everyone was like that.

“That’s cute” she smiled then Calum felt himself smiling too once she looked at him as well.

“Yeah he is” Michael said confidently then he was looking over at Calum and winking and Calum bit at his lip as he smiled.

The girl was then saying the total and Michael had to move his hand from Calum’s back to get his wallet out.

Soon they were walking hand in hand as Calum held the bag and he leaned into Michael to give him another kiss on the cheek.

“Thank you so much, Michael” he said softly and Michael pressed a kiss to his temple.

“Anything for you, baby” he said smiling softly at Calum and Calum felt his stomach fluttering again

“How about we surprise Ashton when we get home?” and Calum nodded quickly, knowing exactly what he meant and he couldn’t wait to show his boys.

*

When they exited the store Ashton was sitting on the bench as he was taking the phone away from his ear then rubbing a hand over his face, looking stressed out and Calum got worried.

“Everything alright?” Michael said, obviously feeling worried as well and both of the boy’s stood above him as Ashton looked up.

“Yeah” he let out a breath “Lauren wants me to come to her Christmas play on Christmas Eve though and I wanted to be with you guys on Christmas Eve”

“Well we’ll just come with” Michael chuckled like Ashton was making too big of a deal about it and Calum nodded, agreeing.

“You will?” Ashton said nervously and both of the boy’s nodded “It will be really boring. I’m just warning you”

“If it’s terrible then me and Cal will just bail” Michael said in a joking tone and Ashton’s worries seemed to fade away.

“Alright” he smiled and let out a breath then he was looking to the bag in Calum’s hand “So what’d you guys get?” and Calum looked to Michael, remembering what he said.

“You’ll see” Michael smirked and Ashton seemed straight up confused.

“Okay” he chuckled then he was standing up “I guess we’ll just a hit a few more stores then we’ll head out” and Calum and Michael both nodded. Calum just really wanted to get home though and show his surprise to Ashton.

*

As soon as they got into the house Michael was leaning into Calum and giving his cheek a few kisses before whispering in his ear.

“Go change and Me and Ash will meet you upstairs” and Calum nodded already feeling excited as he looked over to see Ashton eyeing them suspiciously. He just smiled and then Ashton did the same before shaking his head and looking away.

Calum started making his way towards the stairs and heard Ashton say “What the hell are you guys up to?” before he started heading upstairs and he bit his lip and practically ran up the stairs.

He walked down the dark hallway and then into Michael’s room and flicked on the light as he seen the TV was still on. He hid one of the bags that had Ashton’s present in it in the closet like Michael had told him to and then he walked into the bathroom. He sat the bag on the counter before looking himself in the mirror.

Now that it was actually time to put the panties on he felt himself getting nervous, he was still excited but now there was nerves there too. What if he didn’t look good in them? What if he looked horrible and Michael spent all that money on him for no reason? Calum swallowed hard and had to try and calm down.

He stripped down to only his boxers and then he was looking back to himself in the mirror.

A few months ago he could never look at his naked self in the mirror and now he didn’t feel as miserable so he knew that had to be a good sign. These boy’s were making him feel better about himself and Calum was feeling emotional. These boy’s had helped him in so many ways.

Calum finally took the panties out of the bag and they looked even prettier underneath the bright bathroom lights. He smiled as he felt the softness of them and he started to get really excited again.  
He took a deep breath before taking his boxers off and slipping the red panties on without another thought. If he thought too much more then he would end up talking himself out of this and he did not want to do that. He smiled as he looked at himself in the mirror and he felt so happy.


	63. Ashton

Ashton was laying on Michael’s bed as Michael sat next to him against the headboard with his knees up as he focused on the TV.

“Seriously what is going on?” Ashton finally asked because the suspense was killing him. He knew Calum was in the bathroom but he had no idea what he was doing in there.

“I told you; it’s a surprise” Michael said not looking at him and Ashton let out a huff and that had Michael focusing on him

“You’ll love it…trust me” and Ashton nodded before looking back to the TV “Cal you almost done in there!” Michael said loud enough for Calum to hear.

“Don’t push him” Ashton said being overprotective as usual and Michael rolled his eyes.

“Sometimes you gotta push him a bit, Ash. He wants to do this but he just needs some encouragement” Ashton sighed and supposed that he was right; plus this was Calum and Michael’s thing and he had no idea what was even going on.

He sunk down in the bed a bit more and put his hand under his shirt to start rubbing at his stomach. He always did that when he was starting to get tired and he looked over to Michael and wished it was his hand instead. He was about to ask but then he seen movement from the bathroom door.

It was now cracked open and Ashton sat up a bit

“Don’t be nervous, baby” and Ashton smiled at Michael’s soft speaking towards Calum. He was then looking back to the bathroom door and it was starting to open more.

Ashton felt himself getting more excited, even though he still had no idea what was going on, but he knew Calum was going to walk out soon. He sat up with his arms on his knees like Michael was and then he was staring at the doorway again as he bit at his lip.

Calum was then emerging from the bathroom and Ashton winded his eyes as his mouth fell open. He kept putting his eyes up and down Calum’s slim body and he felt his heart beat pick up as he looked down and seen his dick trapped underneath the red panties. Ashton had never seen someone look so beautiful. He heard Michael whistle next to him and seen Calum blush.

“Fuck, Cal” Ashton whispered because he couldn’t muster up any other words right now.

“Give us a spin” Michael said lifting up his hand and moving his index finger around in a circle. Ashton watched as Calum bit at his lip then he slowly started to turn around. Ashton moved his eyes down his tan back and then his eyes stopped at his ass that was popping out of the underwear and Ashton cursed under his breath and he was now rock hard in his jeans.

“You look fucking incredible, Calum” Michael shot out and Calum was glowing from the compliment. Ashton opened his mouth to agree but no words were coming out.

“Come here” was all that Ashton could say and Calum’s cheek turned red again before he was fast walking towards the bed and climbing over Michael to lay in the middle of the two boy’s.

Ashton let out a breath and instantly put his hand on Calum’s stomach as he rubbed up and down it and he went lower to rub just above the lining of the panties then started toying with the design on the top of them. He could feel Calum’s eyes on him and he looked up to smile at the boy.

Ashton looked over to see Michael right then leaning down to start kissing harshly at Calum’s neck and Calum let out a whimper as he closed his eyes. Ashton was convinced that Michael gave the best neck kisses ever so he knew how good Calum was feeling right now. Ashton moved his hand lower and started to palm Calum under his panties and the fabric was so soft. Calum was whimpering even more now and fuck, all Ashton wanted to do was wreck him.

“You wanna be fucked, Calum?” Michael suddenly spoke into Calum’s neck as if he was reading Ashton’s mind and Ashton looked to see Calum’s reaction. His eyes were still closed as he nodded and Michael kept biting at his neck “Yeah?” Michael said still teasing him and Calum began nodding eagerly again “Well when it comes to guys Ashton has never fucked anyone…You wanna be his first?”

“Yeah” Calum moaned out when Michael moved down to start sucking on one of his nipples and then Calum was opening his eyes and looking straight at Ashton “Please” and Ashton didn’t need Calum to beg him. He’s wanted this for so long and he loved that Michael was letting him do this because he could tell that Michael wanted to fuck him just as bad.

“Stuff’s in the first drawer” Michael said making eye contact with Ashton briefly before going back to suck marks on Calum’s chest. Ashton didn’t want to look away from Calum for even a second but he knew it had to be done.

He turned to open the first drawer of the bedside table then grabbed the lube and a condom before setting it next to Calum and then Michael stopped kissing the boy but kept rubbing at his stomach as he gave Ashton a nod like he was telling Ashton to fuck the desperate boy who was moaning just from Michael’s touch on his stomach.

Ashton took a deep breath then he was hovering over Calum as he spread the boy’s legs apart.

He bent down to just start mouthing at the boy’s dick that was still trapped under his panties, not wanting to take them off quite yet. Then he was licking at the thin fabric and Calum let out a desperate moan like he was just begging Ashton to fuck him already.

Ashton took one more look up at the boy and seen him giving him a pleading stare as he bit at his lip and Ashton rubbed at his thighs before starting to take the panties off then he was tossing them on the floor.

“You ready, pup?” Ashton asked because he needed to make sure and Calum bit at his lip and nodded quickly. Ashton was then grabbing the lube and realized that he had no idea what he was even doing. He was then trying to remember how Michael prepped him when they fucked at that party after the game.

“Start with one finger” Michael said suddenly as he looked at Ashton panicking. Ashton nodded then he was coating one finger and just started rubbing his fingers against the entrance, causing Calum to shiver and buck up, wanting more.

Ashton started to push the finger in and felt the warmness of being inside Calum and couldn’t even imagine how good it would feel to have his dick feeling the heat of him as he stretched the boy out. Ashton swallowed hard and tried not to get too ahead of himself as he kept pushing his finger slowly in and out of Calum.

Ashton looked up to see Michael now kissing Calum’s face and gripping hard on his neck. Michael was always so rough and eager with Calum but Ashton was realizing that Calum loved it when he was like that.

Ashton was then sticking a second finger in and began to scissor Calum as he sped up and remembered that Michael had done this to him and it had felt really good. Calum let out a small whimper at every movement of Ashton’s fingers and then Ashton was smiling softly at Calum when the boy was biting his lip and looking down at him. Calum smiled back and then his mouth opened and he pressed his head into the pillow when Ashton sped up his fingers even more.

Suddenly Calum was letting out a loud moan that filled the room then he was breathing even more heavy as he rolled his eyes back in his head and Ashton knew he had hit that spot so he kept hitting it and he could see Calum shaking as his mouth was open.

“Oh my god” Calum whimpered out.

Ashton put a third finger in and started to slow his fingers down, knowing that Calum was going to come soon if he didn’t.

“Ash…” Calum took his head off the pillow to directly look at Ashton “Ash please” he begged and he looked like he was going to cry with how desperate he looked. Ashton nodded and slowly took his fingers out.

“I’ve got you, baby” he promised him as he rubbed at his thighs. Ashton couldn’t help but bend down to press a few kisses to them and Calum let out a content sigh as he let his head fall back into the pillow.

Ashton took his pants and boxers off and he already had his shirt off so it was one less thing to take off. Ashton put the condom on and grabbed the lube and for some reason looked up at Michael.

Michael was licking his lips as he looked up and down Ashton’s torso then stared at his dick and Ashton put lube on his hand and rubbed slowly on his dick, knowing that Michael was watching him. Michael was then looking to his face and he looked just as desperate as Calum at this point.

“Can you fuck me next?” Michael said with a slightly chuckle but Ashton could tell he was serious and he wanted that just as bad. He sternly nodded at Michael and Michael bit at his lip as he seemed to be getting excited.

Ashton focused back on Calum and just rubbed the tip of his dick against Calum’s hole, making the boy whine.

“Baby look at me” Ashton said sternly and Calum instantly picked his head up to make eye contact with Ashton “Promise that you’ll tell me if it hurts too bad? And I’ll stop” and Calum nodded quickly.

“I promise” and Ashton smiled before looking over to see Michael’s desperate look gone and sweet and fond one instead. He couldn’t help but smile at the pink haired boy then he was letting out a breath before beginning to push into Calum.

He seen that Michael had started to pump a hand on Calum’s dick in hopes of distracting him from the pain and that made Ashton feel better.

He was about half way in when he felt Calum tense up and he looked up to see Calum tightening his jaw and pressing his eyes shut hard.

“Calum?” Ashton said before moving any further.

“I’m okay” Calum nodded but his eyes were still closed. Ashton looked to Michael and Michael just nodded at him so he started going in further.

Ashton watched as Michael still jerked Calum off with one hand and was putting soft kisses on his cheek and temple as it looked like he was whispering things to him.

When Ashton bottomed out Calum let out a stuttered breath and then he was opening his eyes. Ashton could tell his eyes were glossy and that he was in pain and he hated seeing him like this. He just had to keep telling himself that it would get better for Calum soon. Ashton grinded his teeth and it took so much control to not move with how warm and good he felt being inside Calum.

Calum let out a moan and Ashton looked down to see Michael rubbing his thumb against the tip of his dick.

“It will feel better soon” Ashton heard Michael whisper to Calum as he kissed his cheek and wiped away a lingering tear. Ashton was so thankful for Michael “Ashton’s gonna make you feel so good, baby” and now Michael’s words were making Ashton even more desperate. It seemed to be doing the same thing for Calum.

“O-okay” Calum nodded eagerly at Ashton “I’m ready” Michael was then taking his hand off of Calum’s dick and Ashton looked up at him.

“Want him to come just because of what you’re doing” Michael said in a dark and sexy voice and Ashton just smiled wide. He loved Michael so much.

Ashton looked at Calum for a few more seconds before slowly pulling out of him and then slowly going back in and it already felt so good. Ashton did the same thing again but this time he pushed in a bit harder than before and Calum started to pant and Ashton watched his chest move up and down in a fast pace as he pulled out again.

Calum was a moaning mess once Ashton started to speed up and Ashton could feel the sweat dripping down his chest as he had his head tilted back and he was letting out a moans of his own. He couldn’t believe how good topping felt and even though he loved being the one who was fucked he also liked doing the fucking just as much.

He pushed in and out of Calum like his life depended on it and he found himself looking at Michael since he had been so focused on how good he felt to look at the other boy.

Michael was still pressing kisses all over Calum’s chest but then Ashton looked down to see him doing something that he wasn’t doing before. Michael had his hand down his boxers as he was obviously palming himself.

Ashton wanted to fuck Michael after this and make him come but he was sure that Michael could come a second time; it seemed like that boy always wanted to come.

Ashton looked back to Calum and seen that he was pulling at his own hair as he closed his eyes.

“You always look so fucking beautiful, pup” Ashton just felt like he had to say that and it had Calum looking at him and smiling before he was moaning when Ashton pushed into him even harder “So- fuck-” Ashton let out a moan, feeling so close “beautiful” and Calum whimpered as he reached out to start rubbing his hands up Ashton’s thighs.

“I lo-love you” Calum’s voice cracked and Ashton needed to be close to him. He bent down and rested his palms on the bed as he kissed Calum’s lips fiercely and Calum moaned into his mouth at the intensity of it all.

“I love you too” he whispered.  
Ashton looked over to see Michael with his face into Calum’s shoulder as he closed his eyes and was now properly jerking himself off. Ashton moved a bit to start sucking kisses into Michael’s neck and Michael moaned out from just that little bit of attention and Ashton kissed his cheek before pressing his forehead to Calum’s and then quickly thrusting into him and Calum held onto his biceps tightly. Calum let out a loud moan then started to close his eyes and Ashton didn’t want him to look away.

“Keep looking at me, baby” he said sternly and he could now feel Michael’s eyes on him as he pounded into Calum. Calum was letting out quick breaths with his mouth open and Ashton was so blown away by how beautiful he looked as his hair was sticking to his face and his chest and neck were red from breathing so heavily.

“A-Ash” Calum whimpered and Ashton just nodded, knowing he was close, before he was biting and licking at Calum’s neck as he did slow and hard thrusts into him and Calum began to shake under him.

Calum was soon coming between their stomachs and Ashton was soon after at seeing Calum moan so loudly as he pressed his head back into the pillow and arched his back.

Ashton was then pulling out of Calum slowly and taking off the condom to throw into the trash can and then he was falling onto Calum and resting against his chest. He instantly felt Calum’s hand in his hair as he could still feel the boy breathing heavy under him.

“Was that good baby?” Ashton said looking up at Calum and Calum already had a smile on his face.

“So good” he closed his eyes again and bit at his lip like he was thinking about it again and Ashton chuckled before scooting up a bit and kissing his lips softly and then moving down just a bit to rest his head right below Calum’s neck.

Ashton was then turning his head to look at the pink haired boy who had his eyes closed as he laid on his stomach and was breathing heavy as well.

“Did you come?” Ashton asked him and then Michael was opening his eyes and nodding “Can you come twice?” Ashton smirked and Michael chuckled before sitting up a bit and rubbing at his back. The action had Ashton feeling even more tired.

“Definitely” he said with a smile and Ashton nodded.

“Just give me a second” and Michael laid down again and started kissing Calum’s cheek and Ashton felt like if they laid here for too long then they would all end up just falling asleep.

Only a few minutes went by and Ashton was feeling his strength come back to him and he felt himself getting hard just thinking about fucking Michael. He remembered how back at that party Michael wanted him to and Ashton wish he would have. Ashton was pressing a few kissed to Calum’s lips and the boys’ eyes were barely open. Michael seen him getting up and he sat up too.

“Sit against the headboard” and Michael moved down the bed so that Ashton could but Ashton gave him a puzzled look “I’m gonnna ride you. I know you’re tired, Ash” and Ashton smiled; Michael was too sweet. Ashton sat against the headboard like he was told to then Michael was straddling him and instantly kissing him fiercely as he gripped his hands around his neck.

Ashton started to put one hand up and down Michael’s stomach and the other rested on his hip.

“I promise I’ll fuck you properly when I’m not so tired” Ashton whispered against his lips and Michael just smiled.

“You better, Irwin” and Ashton chuckled before kissing the boy again.

He watched as Michael grabbed the lube and Ashton was about to take it from him but then Michael was opening it himself and pouring it on his own fingers. Ashton felt his heartbeat stop a bit and he realized that Michael was going to finger himself. As much as Ashton wanted to finger Michael he knew he would love seeing Michael do it himself. He watched as Michael’s eyes fluttered closed as he was pushing the first finger in and he bounced up and down on his own finger as

Ashton couldn’t help but lean forward and start sucking bruises into his neck and lick at it as he gripped at Michael’s thighs.

Way quicker than what Ashton had expected Michael had three fingers in himself as he whimpered and then he was letting his head fall to Ashton’s shoulder and Ashton began rubbing his hands up his back.

“Have I told you how much I love this color?” Ashton said kissing his hair and he felt Michael smile against his skin. Michael was then sitting up straight again and pressing his lips hard into Ashton’s as he removed his fingers from himself.

“Have I told you how much I love you?” Michael spoke so seriously and now his smile was gone and Ashton felt speechless. It felt like the first time they ever said I love you’s to each other. Ashton swallowed hard and cupped Michael’s cheeks as he held his face.

“Yeah but I’ll never get tired of hearing it” Ashton said softly as he felt himself getting emotional and he closed his eyes for a few seconds. Michael blinked slowly a few times before kissing Ashton less fierce than before but the kiss was also so intense at the same time that he had forgotten that they were even going to fuck until he felt Michael lining himself up with his dick.

“Condom?” Ashton had to ask just in case Michael had just been too caught up in the moment to remember.

“Don’t want one” was all he said and Ashton smiled.

Michael started to sink down slowly and Ashton started to grip hard on his thighs again.

Soon Michael was bouncing fast up and down and Ashton let out a huff as he let his head fall back hard against the headboard.

“Fuck, Michael” Ashton let out a moan and bit at his lips, trying to be quiet.

He felt a bit strange doing this while Calum was sleeping next to him but Ashton doubted he would mind if he woke up. Plus it was hard to think of anything else for too long when Michael was fucking down on him so good.

Ashton already felt so close and he took his head off the headboard as he started kissing Michael’s neck again and held his hips tightly and rubbed at the skin there

“You’re always so good for me” he whispered as he had his face burrowed into Michael’s shoulder and Michael let out a low moan at Ashton’s words and began fucking down even harder and Ashton reached in between them to start jerking Michael off and mainly just focusing on the tip as he rubbed his thumb all against it and Michael let out a high pitched whine that ended in him panting quickly.

“Fuck…fuck, Ash” he said letting his head fall to Ashton’s shoulder and then Ashton was moving slightly so he could start thrusting up into Michael and Michael and the pink haired boy whimpered loudly and kept saying “Ash” over and over as he bit and licked at his shoulder.

It only took a few more thrusts from Ashton to put Michael over the edge and he was shaking as he came down from it.

Ashton came soon after and held Michael tightly to his chest as he kissed the side of his face. He felt Michael’s eyes close and Ashton swore he was going to fall asleep.

“Let’s lay down” Ashton whispered into his hair and Michael nodded before getting off Ashton and lying on his stomach between him and Calum.

Ashton looked over to see Calum still fast asleep and he reached over to softly pet through the boys’ hair before feeling Michael curl up against his side. Ashton turned to lay on his side to face the boy and Michael’s eyes flickered open. Ashton reached forward and pet the back of his hand down Michael’s cheek and it had the boy closing his eyes again. Ashton fell asleep to the sound of Michael and Calum’s soft breathing while his hand was still on Michael’s back.


	64. Michael

“I just don’t understand why I have to dress up” Michael whined as he fixed his collar in the mirror.

“Well you don’t have to do anything” Ashton rinsed his razor off under the water then looked at Michael “But you’ll look pretty out of place if you don’t”

“Ashton” Michael glared at him “I have pink hair…I always look out of place” and Ashton chuckled a bit before sliding the razor against his jaw.

“Fine but I happen to think you look great” and Michael looked up at the mirror to see Ashton dramatically checking him out and he felt his cheeks redden.

Michael was wearing a black button up shirt with black jeans and he couldn’t even remember the last time he had worn it.

As Ashton was shaving he was shirtless and in just a pair of dark blue jeans but Michael remembered seeing a red button up shirt lying on his bed and he couldn’t wait to see it on the curly haired boy.

Michael found himself checking out Ashton as his hair was slicked back and he could see the tiny curls at the ends. All he wanted to do was press Ashton up against the counter and rub his hands through his hair but he knew they were tight on time and Ashton wouldn’t allow it.

“I know what you’re thinking” Ashton smirked and Michael jumped a bit at his sudden deep voice “And we don’t have time”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” Michael said quietly as he looked back to the mirror to start fixing his hair and Ashton chuckled as he finished shaving the left side of his face.

Michael felt like changing the subject because he knew he’d start getting hard if he thought any longer about even kissing Ashton. Even the smallest things got him going

“So will your mom be there?”

“I hope not” Ashton grumbled and Michael felt bad because it seemed like he struck the wrong chord “She never showed up to any of Laurens other plays so I doubt it” and Michael was giving Ashton a worried look in the mirror as he kept his mouth opened and kept concentrating hard on shaving.

“Sorry” Michael mumbled while looking down because he couldn’t think of anything else to say.

“It’s fine” Ashton said easily but Michael could see that it wasn’t fine “I’m used to it. She’s never given a shit about any of us” and Michael was feeling even more miserable than before. Michael would have leaned in to give him a kiss on the cheek if he still didn’t have shaving cream all over his face but he still wanted to comfort him somehow and he swallowed hard.

Ashton was such a beautiful person and Michael hated that he had to deal with shitty parents. Ashton hadn’t really mentioned his dad and that made Michael think that his dad probably wasn’t much better.

Michael left the counter and stood right behind Ashton and Ashton was taking a double look at him. Michael wrapped his arms around Ashton’s torso then started to press kisses to the back of his neck and Ashton let out a breath.

“I’m just happy that you guys are coming with me tonight”

“Of course” Michael spoke against this skin and pressed a kiss to his shoulder. He let his arms fall and stepped back as Ashton finished shaving and then he was rinsing his face off and dabbing it with the towel on the rack. He turned around at Michael with a smile and Michael couldn’t help but put both hands on his now smooth cheeks “I’ve never seen you without the scruff” Michael chuckled and Ashton leaned forward to kiss his lips “I like it though” and he really did. He loved the scruff but his cheeks were so soft and cute now; he almost looked younger.

Michael sensed another presence in the room and looked up to see Calum walking into the bathroom. He gave Ashton one more kiss to his lips and cheek and then he was turning around and leaning against the counter.

“Did you find something to wear, pup?” Ashton said walking closer to the boy in the doorway.

“I think so” Calum said smoothing down his gray sweater that had a pink collar around the top of it. He looked adorable as usual.

“You look cute as hell” Ashton chuckled as he got right in front of Calum and began fixing his collar a bit. Michael didn’t miss the way that Calum scanned his eyes up Ashton’s torso and Michael didn’t blame him. He watched Ashton rub his hands up Calum’s arms a few times as he kissed his lips and then he was walking around him “I just gotta get on my shirt then we can go” and Michael and Calum both walked into the room too.

They both watched as Ashton slipped on the shirt and buttoned it up before running a hand through his hair and then he was grabbing his keys off the end table.

Michael was right; Ashton looked just as incredible in that shirt as he imagined and Michael really just wanted to stay home and ravish him. Ashton was looking down at his phone as he walked closer to Michael then he was pressing a kiss to his cheek.

“Later” Ashton smirked and Michael really needed to stop eye fucking him because he knew it only boosted Ashton’s ego even more with how much control he knew he had over Michael. Ashton was then smacking his ass and standing next to Calum as he put an arm around him then they were walking out of the room.

*

When they got to the theater it was bigger than what Michael thought and he looked up to see some words plastered in lights at the top of the building.

He could tell that it was two stories high and Michael had to admit that this was his first time ever going to a play. He was an only child and his parents were exactly “play” people so he just never had a reason to go to one.

He walked next to Ashton as Calum walked on the other side of the curly haired boy and there was several times that Michael almost grabbed for Ashton’s hand but forced himself not to. He knew how restricted Ashton was when it came to PDA. He wondered if Ashton was like this when he was dating Piper too or if it was just because he was dating guys now instead of a girl. Michael tried not to think about it too much thought because he began to feel sick when he got scared that maybe Ashton wouldn’t ever want to hold his hand in public.

They were in the main lobby now and Michael was just now noticing that Ashton was handing over his money to the guy behind the counter as he took the big box of popcorn. Michael really needed to stop zoning out so badly. Ashton was then putting the box towards Michael as they walked and Michael took a few pieces of popcorn even though he really didn’t even like it very much unless it was cheese popcorn.

Michael watched Ashton offer some to Calum as well then they were walking into a pair of big doors and Michael expected that the stage was in here.

They walked through a tunnel type area and then they were walking out of it and into the big open area. Michael looked up at the different paintings on the ceiling and the walls and turned back to see a balcony. This place was kind of amazing and he knew he would keep looking around even when the play started.

“Can we sit up on the balcony?” Calum asked in an excited voice and Ashton smiled wide before nodding and putting one hand on the small of Calum’s back and leading him towards the stairs that lead to the balcony. Michael kept close to Ashton as more people began to walk into the big room and then they were climbing the stairs.

Once they were on top of the balcony Michael looked down at all the people finding all their seats then all three of the boys were sitting in the very first row in the red velvet chairs.

Ashton seemed like he was looking for someone as he sat forward a bit and looked down. For Ashton’s sake Michael really hoped that Ashton’s mother wasn’t here because he could tell how much it stressed the boy out to even talk about her.

Ashton widened his eyes a bit and started to chew on his bottom lip as his eyes stopped in a certain place on the ground floor and Michael put a hand on his thigh and tapped it.

“You doin’ alright?” he said quietly and close to Ashton. Ashton was then looking at him and putting on a smile but Michael knew straight away that it was a fake one.

“Yeah…I’m fine” Michael just nodded deciding that this was not the right time to ask pry too much. They would talk about it later if Ashton still seemed out of it by the time they got home; Michael hoped he wasn’t though. He hated how Ashton never felt like it was okay for him to be sad or upset; he was human after all and he hadn’t exactly had an easy life so Michael applauded him for handling things as well as he did.

Soon the curtains were opening on the stage and Michael never moved his hand from Ashton’s thigh. He squeezed him a bit when Ashton seemed sad again as he looked in the same spot on the floor as before and then Ashton was looking at him. In this light his eyes looked golden and Michael wanted to kiss him so badly; he always wanted to kiss his boys. He felt Ashton’s big hand slide of his own and then he was intertwining them as he never looked away from Michael and Michael smiled before a song was beginning and Ashton was looking to the stage. Michael never tore his eyes away from the beautiful person in front of him though.

Michael had to admit that he was a bit bored as the play dragged on and then he seen Ashton getting excited and he was pointing at the right side of the stage.

“Guys there’s Lauren” He smiled wide and Michael looked to see a girl with brown hair wearing a long red dress with her hair tied up in a green ribbon. She had a bright smile just like Ashton’s and Michael couldn’t help but smile too. She began to say some lines and Michael now felt interested in the play as she spoke.

The play seemed to fly by after Michael actually started to pay attention to it and he could tell it was ending soon. He glanced over to see Ashton and Calum both taking turns of taking pieces of popcorn and then he seen Calum saying something to Ashton and Ashton smiled before nodding and looking back to the stage.

Michael watched as a few people started to leave, probably wanting to beat the traffic, then he seen that all the kids on the stage were coming out and standing in a long line. He spotted Lauren right away and she was smiling happily as she bouncing on her heels.

They were then exiting the stage and Michael looked to see Ashton stretching his arms behind his back as he yawned a bit.

They waited a few minutes for the crowd to thin out and then Ashton was standing up and leaning against the half wall that was in front of them. Michael usually didn’t over worry about stuff like this but he wished Ashton would stand up because he was worried that he would fall over the edge if he moved the wrong way.

“Well I gotta at least go say ‘hi’ to Lauren then we can go home” he said easily and then Calum was standing up and Michael was doing the same.

*

They were now in some back room that was behind the stage and Michael leaned against the cement wall. Ashton was moving his eyes all over, clearly looking for his sister, and then he was smiling wide and Michael looked to see the girl walking towards them.

“You came!” she said in a high pitched voice before she wrapped her arms around Ashton’s shoulders and Ashton held her back as he picked her up off the floor for a few seconds.

“Of course” he said into her hair “I promised you I would” they separated and Laruen fixed her hair a bit “You did great out there” Ashton said purposely messing up her hair and she acted like she was annoyed by his action but Michael could tell she wasn’t.

“I feel like I mess up a bunch” she said nervously.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself” he scoffed “You did amazing” and Michael loved seeing how Ashton was around his sister. Lauren was suddenly looking at Michael and Michael felt a bit out of place. She was probably wondering who he and Calum were “Oh Lauren” Ashton said quickly “This is Michael and Calum”

“Hi” she waved as she smiled a bit at both of them and Michael just smiled back. Whenever it came to kids Michael never knew what to say to them “So have you seen dad yet?” she said curiously and Michael immediately stopped smiling when he looked at Ashton. He was so pale and looked terrified as he had his mouth opened slightly.

“Wait…he’s” Michael seen Ashton swallow hard and then he was looking all over like he was scared that someone was going to jump out at him “He’s here?”

“Yeah he called me the other day and I told him about the play so he said he would come” Lauren was speaking so calmly while Ashton literally seemed to be losing his mind. Michael reached a hand back and started to rub at the middle of Ashton’s back, hoping that it would calm him. All he wanted to do was hold Ashton right now but he knew he couldn’t.

Michael looked past Ashton for a second to see Calum just as worried as he eyed the side of Ashton’s face. Michael wished Calum would look at him so he could mouth to him that Ashton was okay, even though he knew he wasn’t, but Calum’s eyes were glued to Ashton.

“Well umm” Ashton seemed to be breathing heavily as he looked at the floor “We’re goona go. It was good seeing you, Lauren” and Lauren looked so sad.

“Ashton you can at least say ‘hi’ to him” and Ashton was already shaking his head quickly.

“No….no” he spoke sternly “I don’t want to see him” and Michael leaned into Ashton; God, he hated seeing Ashton like this especially when he couldn’t kiss and hold him.

“Okay” Lauren said sadly “Well thanks for coming” and then Ashton was leaning forward and Michael let his hand fall from his back as Ashton hugged his sister tightly and lightly kissed the side of her head.

“Bye, Lauren” he said once they separated and then Ashton watched her leave and Michael could tell he felt guilty.

“Ash” Michael said quietly and Ashton just flexed his jaw and shook his head. Ashton was pushing his emotions away again and Michael didn’t understand why he always did that. It was like he felt like he wasn’t allowed to feel things.

“Let’s go” he said quietly and then he was rubbing at Calum’s shoulder before he was walking away. Michael kissed the side of Calum’s head before they were following him.


	65. Ashton

All Ashton wanted to do was get the hell out of here before he seen his father and with his luck he would have to see him.

Michael had said that he had to take a piss though so him and Calum were both standing outside the bathrooms in the empty carpeted hall as they stood against the wall.

He felt Calum rest his head on his shoulder and he kissed the top of the boys’ head before just totally giving in. He stood in front of the boy and wrapped his arms around him.

Ashton just really needed to be comforted right now and feeling his boys’ touches always made him feel better. Calum held him tightly around his waist and then he felt the boys’ lips touching the exposed skin softly right below his neck.

“I’m sorry if I was a bit distant tonight, baby” Ashton spoke into his hair and he felt Calum’s hand started to rub at his back. Ashton already felt way better than before just from Calum holding him.

“I just want to make you feel better” Calum whispered and Ashton felt his heart breaking a bit at that.

“You are…you are making me feel better” Ashton kissed his head again and then he was backing up and putting both hands on Calum’s cheeks as he pressed a kiss to his lips “You always know how to make me feel better” and Calum smiled at that. Ashton rubbed the back of his hand on Calum’s cheek and then put both hands on his neck as he kissed him a bit deeper this time and Calum let out a small moan.

“Well what the hell is this?” a voice suddenly said in an angry tone and Ashton felt his heart jump in his throat as he backed away from Calum and looked to the figure that was standing at the end of the hallway. Ashton felt himself getting more nervous as the person got closer and he literally felt like he was going to get a panic attack if he didn’t just run away from this situation.

“Connor just listen…” Ashton began and he really didn’t want Connor to find out this way. He wanted to tell him himself and now he knew that Connor was straight up confused and he really seemed angry which had Ashton wondering why. What was he upset about?

“I can’t believe you would do this” Connor spat out and now Ashton was even more confused. Was he mad that Ashton was gay and didn’t tell him about it? That had to be the only thing that was he upset about and Ashton took a deep breath as he felt Calum moving away from him a bit. He knew how much Calum hated confrontation and he just knew he couldn’t let Connor raise his voice too much.

“Listen I’m sorry I didn’t tell you” he said softly and he seen Connor flexing his jaw “I was going to tell you; trust me I was but I was just having trouble coming out to people. You know you would be the first person I would tell”

“Ashton” he said sternly and then he scrunched his face up “What do you think I’m upset about?”

“Umm” Ashton bit at his lip and looked away for a second “I think you’re mad because I’m gay …right?”

“No” Connor shook his head and looked away “Surprised yes…but I’m not mad because you’re gay; Jesus I’m not a total piece of shit, Ash” and Ashton was thinking so hard, not knowing what Connor was mad about.

“Then…then what are you mad about?” Ashton whispered but he knew Connor heard him.

“You’re ridiculous” he chuckled a but he only did that when he was really upset and Ashton bit at his lip “I’m mad because that’s your friends boyfriend” Connor said pointing at Calum and then looking back to Ashton “And you just fucking kissed him. Do you know how shitty that is?” and then it hit Ashton what Connor was thinking. He was mad because he thought Calum was cheating on his boyfriend with Ashton and Ashton felt like such a shitty person. He would never kiss anyone who was in a relationship and now Connor was probably thinking that he was the biggest piece of shit ever.

“Connor…no” Ashton rubbed a hand over his face and tried to calm down “Fuck it’s not like that. You know I’d never do anything like that”

“Well turns out I was wrong” and Ashton could see how discouraged and upset his friend because of his actions. Ashton couldn’t stand it any longer.

Suddenly Michael was coming out of the bathroom and by the look on his face Ashton could tell that he had heard everything. Michael gave him a soft smile and Ashton actually did feel a bit better as he watched Michael stand next to the wall. Ashton looked back to Connor and realized that he still wanted answers.

“Michael is dating Calum but ummm” Ashton shut his eyes for a few seconds and then he was sighing. He couldn’t believe he was doing this. Connor would think he was absolutely insane but Ashton didn’t even care; this is the happiest he’s ever been and he was so done with worrying about what other people would think “But I’m dating Calum too” and he didn’t look up from the floor as he said it but he felt everyone’s eyes burning into him; Connor’s were the strongest.

“I don’t…I don’t get it” Connor simply said but he didn’t sound angry anymore.

“We’re all dating…all three of us” and then Ashton chuckled “Well all four of us actually”

“You’re dating three people?”

“Yeah” Ashton nodded and it sounded so strange with the way Connor said it but when they were together it felt so perfect and normal.

“Well where’s the other one?” and Ashton couldn’t believe it but Connor actually seemed like he was beginning to accept it.

“Luke’s on vacation out of state” Ashton said sadly and he missed the blond boy so much. He looked over to see Calum and Michael seeming sad as well.

“So you weren’t involved in some cheating thing?”

“No” Ashton said quickly “I wouldn’t ever do that to anyone and neither would Calum” and Ashton could see that Connor was trying to figure it all out in his head “Are you still mad at me?”

“No” Connor said looking at the floor but then he was focusing on Ashton again and smiling which made Ashton feel better “So this is what made you finally break up with Piper. 

“Yeah” but then Ashton thought back “Well I broke up with her mainly because of Luke but I soon realized that I had feelings for them just as much” and Ashton felt so strange opening up to Connor like this because they never talked about stuff like this but it was all true. He knew he finally had to be honest with Connor.

“This is a lot to take in” Connor said with a slight smile as he looked between all the boys “But umm….I don’t care as long as you’re happy” and Ashton felt so lucky that his friend was so supportive.

“I am” Ashton felt his stomach flutter when Calum leaned into him “I’m the happiest I’ve ever been”

“Good” Connor smiled again “You deserve it” and Connor seemed shy as he looked down at the carpet “I kinda wanna hug you right now…would that be weird?” and Ashton let out a laugh as he shook his head.

“No…come here, bud” and Connor smiled bashfully as he stepped closer and wrapped his arms around Ashton’s shoulder and Ashton held him tight.

“I’m really happy for you” and his voice was a bit muffled. Ashton patted at his back and then felt so much weight being taken off of him. Telling Connor was hard at first but it was so worth it now. He was so glad that his friend now knew about these boys that were such big parts of his life. They separated and then Connor was letting out a breath as he looked to Calum and Michael. Calum was nervously chewing on his lip and Ashton couldn’t really tell what Michael was thinking as he leaned against the wall and studied Connor’s face “Shit I’m sorry for freaking out like I did”

“It’s okay…I get why you did now” and then Ashton chuckled a bit “I kinda felt like you hated me for a little bit there”

“I kinda did” Connor laughed “I just couldn’t believe that you’d do something like that…I just know what it’s like to be cheated on” and Ashton had forgotten about that. A year ago Connor’s girlfriend cheated on him and Ashton has never seen him so low.

“I know” he said sadly and Connor seemed like he was thinking hard about what his ex girlfriend did to him. Ashton all of a sudden started to think about how his father could still be somewhere in this building and he started to get nervous again.

“Can we talk later?” Connor said like he was sensing Ashton’s nervousness and Ashton quickly nodded “Alright well you guys have a good Christmas” he said as he started to back away.

“Yeah you too” Ashton said and he looked over to see Michael smiling at Connor which made Ashton feel better. Ashton watched him walk away and he felt a bit speechless at what had just happened. He had told someone else about his relationship status and he had admitted out loud that he was gay. He really did feel relieved and he smiled while letting out a breath when he looked at the two beautiful boy’s next to him.

*

None of them said a word to each other while they walked to the car and Calum only leaned into Ashton and gave him a kiss on the shoulder.

Michael and Calum probably knew that Ashton had just done something pretty big and he was just still coming down from feeling so stressed out.

They were now in the car, driving down a back road, and Ashton looked back to see Calum with his head on the window as his eyes were closed. He felt Michael’s eyes on him as he looked back to the road and he knew the pink haired boy was going to say something. He tightened his grip on the steering wheel and let out a sigh.

“Hey” Michael whispered and Ashton looked to the boy as he put a hand on Ashton’s thigh “I’m really proud of you, Ash” and Ashton got a warm feeling in his chest as he smiled “I know that was a really big step for you”

“I’m just so tired of hiding” and Ashton hated how weak he sounded, like he was close to tears but Michael just rubbed at his thigh.

“I know” Michael said softly and Ashton swallowed hard before grabbing Michael’s hand off his thigh and then pressing a kiss to the back of it. He was so thankful to have these boys in his life. He intertwined their fingers then put them back on his lap “And I’m sorry that I called Connor an asshole; he’s a really good guy” and Ashton was so happy that Michael liked Connor now.

“Well” Ashton chuckled “I’ve been friends with asshole guys in the past so you weren’t completely wrong” and Michael just laughed as he squeezed Ashton’s hand.

Sure tonight had been stressful but Ashton knew that the night would have been a hundred times worse if he would have seen his father so he was so thankful that he didn’t. He was with his boy’s now though so he was content and happy.


	66. Calum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Christmas chapters yay!

When Calum woke up he could feel the warm sunlight on his bare back and for a few seconds it felt like it was summer and Calum hummed at the thought of it. He then turned a bit and seen that fresh snow was falling and he remembered what day it really was; it was Christmas day.

The next thing that Calum felt was Michael’s soft breath against his neck and the boy’s arm loosely hanging over his hip.  
Ashton was laying on his back right in front of Calum and he had his arms above his head as his face was turned towards Calum but his eyes were still closed.  
Calum started to think back to all the mornings that he woke up alone and depressed and he didn’t even know how he brought himself out of bed every day with how empty he used to feel every morning.

Now whenever he woke up he felt so happy and couldn’t wait to see what the day had in store for him and his boy’s.

Today he knew they would probably just be cuddling all day and eating too much food and he was totally okay with that. It was actually one of his favorite things to do because that meant that he didn’t have to share his boy’s with anyone else. Calum was selfish and he knew it but he just couldn’t help it; Michael, Ash and Luke just meant the world to him and he hated having to share them with other people.

He felt Michael rub his face against his hair a bit and then his hand was moving up to rub at Calum’s lower stomach and Calum smiled before turning slowly to face the pink haired boy. Michael’s eyes were still closed as half his face was pressed into the pillow so Calum started to press light kisses all over his face and he felt Michael tightened his hand around his hip as he let out a small laugh.

“It’s Christmas isn’t it?” Michael whispered and Calum let out laugh of his own.

“Yeah it’s Christmas” Calum said giving Michael’s lips a peck and then backing up a bit to look at him. Michael’s eyes were only half open and his hair was a mess like it always was in the morning and it was times like these that Calum realized how in love he really was. He had been in love with Michael for so long but now that Michael was actually involved in his life the feeling was even more intense and Calum didn’t even think that was possible with how much he loved Michael before he had even had a proper conversation with the boy.

“Well merry Christmas” Michael smiled as he rubbed a hand down Calum’s hair.

“Merry Christmas” Calum smiled wide as he bit at his lip and then he seen Michael looking past him. Calum turned to see Ashton still fast asleep as his chest moved up and down.

“Ash must be pretty tired” Michael said reaching over Calum and rubbing at Ashton’s stomach with the tips of his fingers. Ashton was usually always the first one up so this was surprising that he was still asleep “What do you say we go make some breakfast for him?” and Calum nodded excitedly. Ashton, especially, has done so much for all of them so it was the least they could do. Calum wish he could give Ashton everything in the world; he was just such a good person.

Calum watched Michael slip out of bed and then he was slipping on some grey sweats over his boxers. Calum followed him and Michael was tossing him his red flannel, knowing that Calum loved wearing the boy’s clothes, and Calum smiled wide before slipping it on.

When they got down the stairs Calum could see the presents under the tree and he felt so happy. He remembers how they all wrapped their presents to each other in separate rooms late last night and Calum couldn’t wait until they got to open them. It wasn’t even that he was excited to get new stuff, it was just that he had never had a proper Christmas where he got to just open presents surrounded by people that loved him. Sure, when he was really young his mother would get him a few things but they could never afford much and the day would always end with his father stumbling in drunk and yelling at them about how his mother shouldn’t spend money that they didn’t have.

Calum pushed those awful thoughts away and just focused on how great today would be. He knows that he would always remember this day.

When they got into the kitchen Michael started to look around in cupboards and finally grabbed the blueberry pancake mix in the back, knowing that it was Ashton’s favorite, and then he was getting a few pans out.

“Do you wanna fry the bacon?” Michael said glancing up at him and Calum nodded as he went around the counter and stood next to Michael. Michael opened the bacon and then handed it to him before Calum was going over to the stove where the pans were already laid out.

Bacon was one of the few things he could cook so he wasn’t worried about it. He heard Michael begin to hum behind him and this whole situation was so domestic.

Calum started to think about doing stuff like this for the rest of his life. He had only known these boys for a short while but he had never been happier and they all fit so perfect with each other. Calum really hoped the other boys thought the same.

Suddenly Michael was coming up behind him with the pancake mix and kissing his neck a few times before petting the back of his hair and Calum knew he would always get that warm feeling in his chest every time the boy’s would kiss him or touch him. Calum giggled a bit when Michael tickled his side a few times and then he seen Michael smiled as he poured the mix into the pan.

“You excited to see Luke in a couple days?” Michael asked with a smirk and Calum knew that he already knew the answer.

“Of course” Calum laughed “And you?”

“Nah…it’s been nice not having him around cause it means I don’t have to share my cereal” Michael said easily and it had Calum giggling “It’s actually driving me insane how much I miss him” and Calum could hear the sadness in his voice. Calum leaned into him and gave him a few kisses on his bare shoulder before leaning his cheek against it.

“Me too” Calum agreed cause he also missed Luke like crazy and he knew Ashton did too.

“I can’t even handle Luke being gone for a week so I have no idea how I’m going to survive when Ashton goes away to college” Michael said with a chuckle and Calum chuckled too until he let those words really sink in. Ashton was going away to college at the end of the summer, with him most likely getting into Florida State or some other far away college and they would only see him on certain holidays.

The thought of not sleeping next to Ashton every night and not being around him practically every day made Calum sick to his stomach. He had no idea how he would survive without Ashton either

“Cal” Calum was now fully facing him and he didn’t even remember Michael turning him. Calum looked up at Michael and seen the worry on his face.

“Just don’t think about it right now okay?” and Calum nodded but now that Michael mentioned something about it it was impossible not to think about

“We’ve got him here right now though and that’s all that matters” Calum smiled at that and wrapped his arms around Michael then felt his lips on his head.

“We do” He mumbled into Michael’s chest and placed a few kisses there.

“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it” Michael took a deep breath “But for now we’ve got some kick ass pancakes to eat and presents to open”

“I love you, Michael” Calum said after giggling and Michael held him tighter as he ran his fingers through his hair.

“I love you too, baby” and Michael started to press kisses on the side of his head “It’s gonna be okay” and Calum believed him.

*

  
When they got upstairs Ashton was still lying on his back in the same position and Michael held a big plate of pancakes and bacon while Calum held a glass of chocolate milk.

Him and Michael had already eaten downstairs. Calum watched as Michael sat the plate down on the end table, and Calum set the chocolate drink down too, then Michael was lying entirely on top of Ashton as he press sloppy kisses all over his face and Calum giggled into his hand. Ashton groaned a bit but still kept his eyes closed. Michael stopped kissing his face and instead buried his face in Ashton’s neck as he started to repeat “Ash” over and over.

“Hmmm?” Ashton managed to get out and his eyes started to flicker open as he rubbed at his own hair and then his face.

He smiled when his eyes landed on Calum and Calum smiled back before looking back to Michael who was hovering right above Ashton and Ashton started to trail a hand down the pink haired boys spine

“Hi” Ashton said in his low morning voice and Calum tried not to let it get him going cause it always did.

“Hi” Michael said in a chirpy voice before he pecked a kiss to Ashton’s lips. Ashton hummed from the soft kiss and closed his eyes again as Michael started peppering kisses down his neck. Even though Calum did want to be getting kisses too he never got tired of seeing Ashton and Michael together like this.

Michael was then looking back at Calum and reaching a hand out. Calum got closer to him and then without warning Michael was pulling him down into the bed to where he was laying on Ashton too.

“Morning pup” and Calum loved how Ashton would always use a slightly softer voice when talking to him. Calum blushed a little and smiled as he put his face in Ashton’s neck and felt Ashton’s other arm go around him.

Calum looked up to see Michael running his eyes over Ashton’s face as he pet a hand through his hair and Calum wasn’t sure how but he just knew that Michael was thinking about what they had been talking about downstairs; about how they might not always have Ashton around for too much longer and Calum felt his heart breaking at the sad look on Michael’s face. Calum watched fondly as Ashton put a hand on Michael’s cheek and leaned up a bit to kiss his lips and Michael kissed him back like he was afraid he was leaving today. Calum swallowed hard and felt the tears swelling up in his eyes so he grabbed Michael’s hand and squeezed it.

“We made you breakfast” Michael said with a shy smile as he nodded towards the end table and Ashton was instantly looking over at it and he closed his eyes as he smiled and rubbed a hand over his face.

“You guys are the greatest” he said before pressing a kiss to Calum’s forehead and then to Michael’s. Calum kind of started to forget about the presents and realized that he would be totally okay with just laying in bed the rest of the day. Maybe they could all just stay in bed until Luke came home; Calum thought that was a pretty good idea.


	67. Ashton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Props to anyone who notices that I referenced a The Summer Set song in this chapter (Idk how this chapter became so long)

As soon as they got downstairs Michael was sitting on the floor right in front of the tree as he began to look for his present and Calum sat right beside him. Ashton already felt so happy after waking up to Michael on top of him as he kissed him and then Calum cuddled up next to him as well. The breakfast in bed was also amazing and Ashton only thought things like that happened in movies. He had a feeling that today would be great; every day with these boys was.

“Wait wait” Ashton said when it looked like Michael was about to open his “We promised Luke that we would Skype him while we opened presents” and Ashton grabbed Michael’s laptop off the desk in the corner of the living room. He then sat against the bottom of the couch on the floor next to Calum as he got the computer running and brought up Skype as he sent a quick text to Luke to remind him.  
As soon as Luke’s face appeared on the screen Ashton chuckled when Michael forgot all about the present in his hands and instead focused on the beautiful blond on the computer.

“Merry Christmas!” Luke screamed and they all died laughing at his enthusiasm. Ashton also got sad because he wished the boy was here with them. Ashton sat the computer on the floor so everyone could see it “Michael your hair” he gasped and Ashton got a bit flustered when he remembered what happened in the bathroom while Michael was in the process of dying his hair.

“Oh yeah” Michael smiled while putting a hand through it “Do you like it?”

“I love it” Luke said straight away and Michael beamed at Luke’s reaction then Ashton could see that Michael was looking around the screen for a few seconds.

“Where the hell are you right now?” Michael started laughing.

“Oh I’m at the beach” Luke shrugged “My parents both have terrible sunburn and they won’t stop complaining so I had to get out of the hotel room”

“Well you better be wearing sunscreen” Michael teased and Luke rolled his eyes.

“Yes mother” Luke smirked and then he was taking his sunglasses off and moving the computer a bit.

  
*

By the flip of a coin Calum was the first one to open his present and Ashton loved seeing the smile on his face as he unwrapped it. Him and Michael had both gotten it for Calum even though it was pretty simple they all agreed to not go all out on gifs and he knew that Calum would love it. Calum was then gasping a bit as he seen the huge set of paints and brushes with a thick book of plain white paper.

“I remember you saying that you were running low on paint” Ashton spoke and Calum looked like he was going to cry but didn’t have time to reach out to him because Calum was jumping forward and wrapping his arms around his shoulders.

“Thank you, Ash” he said into his hair and Ashton kissed his head as he rubbed his back.

“You’re welcome, baby” and then Calum was leaning back to give him a kiss on the lips before he was giving a big tight hug to Michael too.

“Cal you still gotta paint of my pictures for me” Luke said with a smile and Calum looked shocked for a moment that Luke remembered that then he was smiling wide and nodding.

“I promise I will” Calum said in an excited tone.

Next it was Ashton’s turn and he was surprised when he had two to open instead of one like Calum and Michael had. He picked up the first one and he already had an idea of what it was and he looked up at Michael as he smirked. Michael smirked back and Ashton felt his cheeks get red. When he unwrapped it he looked at the bottle of red wine and he instantly remembered being at the party with Michael. That was when they were first starting to get to know each other and even back then Ashton knew how in love he was with the boy.

“Shit” Ashton chuckled as he looked down at it “The memories”

“Drunk memories” Michael smiled and Ashton couldn’t help but smile too. Ashton remembers sitting on the steps while drinking this same exact wine watching Michael dance around the living room and then he ended up dragging Ashton out there too. It was about an hour after that they went upstairs and ended up taking a bath together and that was the first time that Ashton had ever had sex with a guy. He was so happy that Michael was his first.

“Thank you, Michael” Ashton said looking up at him and then he was laughing “I can’t believe you remembered”

“Of course I remembered” Michael said like it was obvious and Ashton leaned over Calum to give Michael a deep kiss and he chuckled when Luke did a wolf whistle at them.

Ashton was then opening Calum’s gift to him. Calum was currently leaning against Michael as Michael rubbed a hand through his hair and Calum looked a bit nervous as he bit at his lip. He was a amazed when he seen the three shirts that he said he wanted when they went to the mall the other night and he smiled wide as he looked at them all individually.

“Cal” Ashton said softly and Calum blushed “These were the shirts I said I wanted” and Calum nodded as he smiled “Thank you, baby” he said leaning forward and kissing Calum on the lips too. He kind of loved having an excuse to kiss his boys even more than usual.

When it came time for Michael to open his present Calum and Ashton made sure to put it in a big box before wrapping it so Michael couldn’t try and guess what it was. Michael unwrapped it rather quickly and then he was raising his eyebrows at the both of them.

“I can’t believe you guys knew that I wanted a George Forman Grill” Michael said and Ashton was rolling his eyes while he laughed.

“Just open it” Michael did as he was told and his face was priceless as he started to pull the item out of the box.

“Holy shit….guys” he said rubbing the jacket between his fingers and roaming his eyes all over it and then he looked worried as he looked up at them “This was a lot of money”

“Don’t worry about that” Ashton said right away. It was expensive but him and Calum both paid for half of it and besides, Michael deserved it. Calum had told Ashton how badly he seemed to want it when they went in the store

“Fuck..thank you guys” he said quietly before hugging Calum and then bringing Ashton into their hug too. He kissed them both then they all heard someone clear their throat. They looked to the computer and Luke was crossing his arms, looking very left out and they all giggled “Sorry, Lukey” Michael said sincerely.

“I wanna be there so bad” Luke said pouting

“I know baby” Michael spoke softly again.

“I wanna see you in that jacket though” Luke smirked a bit and Michael nodded before slipping it on.

“Cause when I put on my jean jacket I still think about you” Michael sang and they all laughed.

“It looks fucking great on you” Ashton said and the other boys nodded. Michael looked up to give Ashton a soft smile.

“Oh and Luke we didn’t get you anything” Michael said not making eye contact with him but Ashton looked at the screen to see Luke fake pouting.

“Yeah we did” Ashton chuckled then rolled his eyes when Michael glared at him “You can open it when you get home alright?” and Luke smiled wide as he rested his face on his knee.

“I got you guys some stuff too” Luke suddenly said and that had Michael paying attention again.

“Well we didn’t need anything” Michael said and Ashton looked at him quickly, wondering where he was going with this “Just seeing you again will be the best present ever” and Luke seemed to be glowing as he somehow looked both happy and sad from Michael’s words.

“Sap” Ashton said quickly as he covered it up with a fake cough and Michael shot him another glare but Ashton just smiled wide. It was safe to say that they were all a bunch of saps and Ashton was totally okay with that.

*

The day was so perfect and Ashton didn’t want it to end. They ended up Skyping Luke until his parents were calling him to come back to the hotel room but he promised them that he would be home in a few days and Ashton couldn’t wait.

It seemed like so much had happened while Luke was gone and he was so sad that Luke wasn’t there to experience it with them. He knew they would have plenty of good memories to come though; especially when they all went on the trip that Ashton had planned for when Luke came back.

All three boys were currently lying on the couch as Calum was painting something and Michael had his head on Ashton’s lap with Ashton putting fingers through his hair. Ashton could tell how content the pink haired boy was by how he kept closing his eyes and Ashton loved being like this with his boys; just cuddling with no worries in the world.  
Ashton felt the happiness drain from him a bit when he seen a text from his sister though and he let out a breath. It was the last thing he wanted to deal with; especially now since he just had such a good day and he didn’t want it to end.

Lauren  
_There’s a big Christmas party at moms tonight. Can you come? Harry misses you_

Ashton did feel his heartbreaking a bit at that last part though. Harry was so used to having Ashton around growing up but recently Ashton had hardly been around at all. He was just so happy with his boys and it was very hard for him to leave them; not to mention that he couldn’t stand being around his mother and Lauren and Harry understood that.

Ashton started to think about what he should say back. He could just take the easy way out and say that he was sick but he knows he would feel bad about that later and besides, it was only one night (He knew it would run late and he would probably have to stay the night but he could just leave early the next morning) and he figured he should just do it for his siblings since he hadn’t seen them that much recently.

Ashton let out a breath and his head fell against the back of the couch and he could feel Michael’s eyes on him. Soon he felt Ashton’s hand rubbing at his stomach and he looked down.

“What’s wrong?” Michael said curiously and Ashton let out another breath.

“Every year my mom throws this big Christmas party…and my sister wants me to go”

“When’s the last time you went to one?” and Ashton couldn’t think of any exact amount of time because it had felt so long since he went to one.

“It’s been…years”

“Well you’re a really comfortable pillow so you know I don’t want you to go” Michael said jokingly and Ashton chuckled.

“Yeah I don’t want me to go either” Ashton mumbled and now Calum was giving him a worried look “But Lauren really wants me to go and she said Harry misses me”

“Well it is Christmas…maybe you should be with your family” Michael said and it caught Ashton off guard; it just didn’t seem like something Michael would say.

“Yeah but I’d rather be here with you guys” Ashton said petting Michael’s hair and Michael smiled up at him but raised his eyebrows “Maybe you’re right; besides, I’ll be back here tomorrow morning” and Ashton felt okay with his decision; after all, it was only a day and he could easily just act like he was tired and go up to his room early if things became too much for him; Ashton had a feeling he would end up doing that.

*

It was dark out by the time Ashton forced himself to leave Michael’s house and head over to his own.

He could still taste Michael and Calum’s lips on his from when he gave them both a kiss goodbye as they were sprawled out on the couch.

As soon as Ashton walked away he heard Calum start giggling and turned to see Michael tickling his sides an god, Ashton hated having to leave.

Sometimes it scared him how attached he really was to these boys because he was literally only going to be away from them for less than a day and already felt like turning his car around and going back to them. He had no idea how Luke was coping this long without any of them and Ashton knew that as soon as Luke came back he would probably hold him for 15 minutes straight and then give the other boys a turn only to be holding him again.

It was really hitting him just how much he missed the blond boy and he felt so bad that Luke was alone in some foreign country without any of them.

As Ashton was turning onto his road it felt so different because it had been so long since he had been here. Even if he did come back to his house it was only to pick up a few things and then he would be going straight back to Michael’s house.

Ashton had to keep telling himself that he would be back at Michael’s tomorrow morning so this really wasn’t a big deal. He really wasn’t looking forward to seeing his mother and few other relatives but he knew he would just have to cringe through it for his siblings; they were the only reason he was even doing this.

Soon he was pulling into his driveway and he could see at least six cars parked on the road in front of his house. He sat in the car even after it was turned off and seen all the lights downstairs turned on as he would occasionally see people walk in front of the big front window. He honestly didn’t notice any of the cars but he knew it had been a while so he was sure his relatives got new cars since he had least seen them.

Ashton figured it was now or never; he knew that if he sat in this car any longer then he would talk himself out of this and for his brother and sisters sake he couldn’t do that. He owed it to them that he would at least show up at the Christmas party; especially since Ashton knew he wouldn’t be around too much after this.

He stepped out of the car with his hands in his jean jacket that Michael loved to borrow and Ashton put his face down into the collar a bit to see that it still smelled like Michael’s collonge and he smiled to himself. The smell made him feel comforted and Ashton actually felt happy for a few seconds until he looked up and seen his mother in the front window and Ashton cringed. She was in deep conversation with one of her sisters as she kept moving her hands. Ashton rolled his eyes away and opened the door as the warm air from inside hit his face.

As soon as he stepped inside all eyes seemed to be on him and he didn’t even dare to look at his mother, even though he could feel her stare. Thankfully Harry was emerging from the kitchen and running towards his older brother.

“Ashton!” he said before standing in front of him and Ashton picked him up and put him over his shoulder as Harry started to giggle and squirm “Ashton stop!”he said still giggling and now the cold stares from his family members were turning into smiles as most of them just looked away after that. Ashton put Harry down and then messed up his hair.

“Hey little man. Where’s Lauren?”

“She’s eating in kitchen. Come on” Harry said already grabbing Ashton’s hand and pulling him into the kitchen.

Tonight wouldn’t be so bad if he could just hang around his siblings and carry on without his mother wanting to talk to him. He still felt her eyes on him as Harry dragged him through the living room and around different people; most of them Ashton didn’t even recognize.

They got to the kitchen and Lauren was sat at the table by herself as he ate a big plate of fruit and she immediately looked up.

“Oh Ash! When I’m done eating I gotta show you what I did in art class” and Ashton just nodded, he was down for anything that would get him in another part of the house and away from everyone. He was never big on crowds anyways but he especially felt uncomfortable now when it seemed like he really wasn’t wanted here. Maybe Ashton was just overreacting but it sure seemed like that.

Ashton sat at the end of the table and looked around his kitchen. It was so much different than Michael’s and he started to wonder what him and Calum were up to. He was sure that they were up to no good but Ashton knew they were having fun.

Thankfully Lauren was finishing her plate and then standing up quickly as she urged Ashton to follow her upstairs. It was almost pitch dark as they got at the tops of the stairs and the voices downstairs were only faint as Ashton actually felt himself beginning to calm down. He looked down the hall to see his bedroom door shut just like it was when he had left the last time he was here and then he turned to see Lauren walking into her bedroom. Ashton followed and it was different than what he remembered and he seen that there was paintings all over the walls now. He was immedietly reminded of Calum and he felt himself smiling when he thought about how Calum hadn’t stopped painting since he opened the paints. He remembers sitting on the couch as Michael laid on the floor, doing a sexy pose, as he said “Paint me like one of your French girls” to Calum which caused all the boy’s to burst out laughing. It ws such a simple day they shared together but yet it had been without a doubt the best Christmas Ashton had ever had.

“Ash?” Laruen said in a slightly annoyed voice.

“Hmm?” Ashton looked up at her where she was now standing in front of one of the bigger paintings.

“I said ‘do you like it?’” she said pointing to the painting and Ashton walked closer to her. It was a painting of a sunset and a few palm trees and Ashton was actually impressed by how good it was.

“That’s really good, Lauren”

“I did it with water paint”

“My bo-“ Ashton froze and shook his head “My friend, Calum paints too” and Ashton started to hate himself again. It was just his sister but he still hated every time he would refer to one of the boys as his “friend” instead of his “boyfriend”. It gave him such a gross feeling and Ashton rubbed a hand over his face.

“Is he good?” Lauren asked in an excited voice as she sat at the end of her bed.

“He’s…he’s amazing” Ashton chuckled “He’s actually going to college for art”

“Was he the one with the pink hair?” and Ashton laughed.

“No that was Michael…Calum was the other one”

“Are they your best friends?” and it was so typical Lauren to ask so many questions but Ashton didn’t mind; he just wanted to stay away from all the people downstairs.

“Yeah…they are” which was true. They were Ashton’s best friends but they were also the loves of his life.

“So you love them?” Lauren said sitting up a bit more and Ashton laughed as he ran a hand through his hair.

“Where are you going with this, Lauren?”

“Well when you guys came to my play….” And she seemed nervous

“I noticed that your friends look at you like Brandon and Jessica look at each other”

“Who is Brandon and Jessica?” Ashton said feeling so confused.

“They’re two people who come into my music class sometimes…and Jessica said they’ve been married for 20 years” and Ashton felt his heartbeat picking up as he looked away at Lauren and looked to the carpet. Lauren could tell that they were together? Or she could at least tell that Michael and Calum were interested in him.

“But ummm….how do I look at them?” Ashton mumbled, still not looking up.

“You look at them the same way” she said and Ashton could hear the smile in her voice. Ashton honestly didn’t know what to say and he just looked nervously around the room “I bet it’s nice having two boyfriends…you must get a lot of chocolates” and Ashton let out a laugh at that.

“Three” and he looked up to see Lauren confused “Three boyfriends…Luke’s out of town”

“I wanna meet him too then”

“Isnt this…weird to you?” and Lauren instantly shook her head.

“I like three boys at my school too and I wish I could date them all”

“How about you just stick to one alright?” Ashton did a small smile and Lauren nodded “We should umm…we should get downstairs” he said standing up. He didn’t think he could deal with any more awkwardness.

“So are you gonna marry them?” Lauren stood up too and Ashton swallowed hard at her question. Did he picture spending the rest of his life with those boys? Yes but marriage seemed really far away; he was only 17 after all.

“Let’s just” Ashton chuckled a bit and motioned to the door and luckily Lauren started to walk towards it.

They were walking down the stairs and Lauren still seemed like she wanted to ask more questions but luckily she didn’t and just walked past Ashton and she seemed excited. Ashton looked up to see one of their cousins, who was Laurens age, waving at her on the other side of the living room. Lauren went running off towards her without another word and Ashton chuckled.

He started to look around and luckily things were starting to clear out. Ashton felt his breath catch in his throat when he felt someone looking at him and he started frantically looking around.

His eyes finally landed on an older man standing by the front door, almost glaring at him and Ashton just needed to get away from his stare. He couldn’t believe he was here. Was this why Laruen even invited Ashton over? She was always trying to make peace so it really wouldn’t be surprising and Ashton felt himself getting angry.

He ran down the rest of the stairs and towards the kitchen, luckily there was no one else in there and Ashton leaned against the counter, trying to slow down his breathing as he put his palm over his eyes. He then pushed himself off the counter and grabbed a big glass down from the cupboard and then went to the fridge to grab a can of coke before going back to the cupboard where he grabbed the Jack Daniels from the very top shelf. He only poured a quarter of the can of coke into the glass and just filled the rest with Jack.

It was very rare that Ashton drank heavy liquor but he just really needed it right now. He was feeling a bit self destructive but he just couldn’t help it; his dad was here and was probably about to come talk to him at any minute. Ashton hadn’t talked to him since he had left their family when Ashton was young and Ashton wished it would stay that way.

Even when Ashton’s dad was around all he did was drink and barely pay attention to any of them. So after he left his mother started drinking too, even on holidays, and things just went downhill after that. Ashton’s dad leaving was the reason that their family got torn apart and Ashton couldn’t ever forgive him for that.

Ashton was then chugging down the entire glass, only taking a break to breathe halfway through, before he was slamming the empty glass back down on the counter. He could feel the burn down his throat and he had to admit that he loved the feeling of the liquid going down into his stomach as he felt himself actually calming down a bit. He had Calum, Michael and Luke so he never needed to drink but now he didn’t have any of them with him so he felt himself breaking a bit.

It was as if someone from outside his body was controlling his movements as Ashton poured more of the coke and Jack into the glass and filling it all the way up once again. This time he wasn’t able to drink it as easily but he still managed to get it all down and he was heavily breathing as he put his arm on the counter and then rested his head on it. He could feel the liquid moving around in his stomach as he shifted his feet and his throat was still burning.

“Are you seriously drinking right now, Ashton?” and Ashton immediately cringed at the voice.

“I guess I learn it from my mother” he grumbled into his arm, refusing to look at her.

“I haven’t seen you in months and then you just start getting drunk in my kitchen?” she said raising her voice again and it was driving Ashton nuts. It was probably the alcohol but even the slightest of noise was driving him insane; he just wanted it to be quiet.

“I didn’t come here for you” Ashton said finally standing upwards then putting the Jack Daniels up in the cupboard “I came here for Lauren and Harry”

“Well I don’t think you’ll be much use to them if you’re drunk” she barked back at him and Ashton groaned as he turned to face her.

“Well at least I actually pay attention to them! You were never there for them so I had to be while you were getting drunk at noon and bringing home a different guy every night” Ashton just let it all spill out and he couldn’t hold it back any more “I don’t even know why you put on this stupid party every year and act like it’s for Lauren and Harry when you are literally the shittiest mom ever!” and Ashton did feel a bit of guilt stir in his stomach at the last thing he said when he seen the hurt on his mother’s face.

“Well I am doing my best, Ashton! And you’re being really selfish by never being around anymore and-“

“Selfish?! I’m being selfish?! You’re their fucking mother and I was the one who raised them…sorry for actually having my own life now and being happy with my friends” he said as he could feel his face getting hot “It was your job to take care of them and I was expected to do it for all those years; I can’t fucking do it anymore”

“Fine” she spit out and then she was grabbing her keys off the counter “Do whatever you want, Ashton” and Ashton watched her stomp out of the kitchen and it was so typical of her to leave her own party but Ashton was glad that she was.

He looked out into the living room and there were only a few people left in the living room as Christmas music was still blaring so thankfully no one had heard their argument.

“Fuck” Ashton leaned against the counter again as he rubbed a hand over his face and just kept it there as he closed his eyes.

“Ashton” said a small voice from somewhere in front of him and Ashton jerked his head up to see his younger brother standing in the doorway with tears in his eyes.

“Harry” Ashton choked out and stepped forward which made Harry step back, clearly not wanting to be close to him and it made Ashton’s heart break.

“Why did you hurt mom’s feelings like that?”

“Bud…” Ashton began but he didn’t exactly know where he was going with this “She’s just not the kind of mom that you guys deserve. She needs to give you guys more…attention and love” Ashton knew he was stumbling on his words and he just hoped Harry didn’t know that he had been drinking…but of course he did; he had heard the argument.

“But she does…she’s better now” and Ashton let out a breath; somehow he was having a hard time believing that. People like his mother didn’t just change in that short amount of time.

“Well I’m glad” was what Ashton said instead.

“Mom loves you so why don’t you love her?” Harry said starting to cry and Ashton walked closer again but Harry backed up a few steps once again.

“Harry you’re just young…you don’t understand. Just come here bud…I hate seeing you cry like this” Ashton said reaching out and Harry just shook his head.

“No!” he yelled way louder than what Ashton expected and he jumped “I do understand! I’m not stupid Ashton!”

“I never said you were stupid Harry just listen-“ and Ashton didn’t have time to finish the sentence before Harry was running out of the kitchen and Ashton could see him running up to his room.

Ashton let out another breath at how stressful this night had already been. He had no idea why he even came here if Lauren was just going to go hang out with their cousin and Harry was just going to scream and get mad at him before running off to his bedroom.

Ashton should have just stayed at Michael’s house.

Without even thinking Ashton was opening the fridge and grabbing a bottled beer from the bottom drawer as he chugged it and felt his stomach hurting but before he knew it he was grabbing another one and doing the same thing. He knew he was drunk now as he grabbed onto the fridge door, feeling like he was literally about to fall over.

Ashton didn’t even know how much time had passed but next thing he knew he was sitting on the kitchen floor with his back to the cold fridge and he felt himself shivering a bit. He didn’t know if it was from nerves or from the cold but he couldn’t the shivering seemed to get worse to where his back and shoulders started to hurt.

He jumped sky high when he heard a deep voice say his name.

“Getting drunk at the Christmas party” the deep voice man chuckled and Ashton didn’t look at him “I’ve taught you well” and Ashton hated that his father thought that was like him; cause he wasn’t at all. He was just having a hard time right now.

“Get the fuck away from me” Ashton spoke sharply and in the corner of his eye he could see his father backing up a bit.

“Just thought I’d say ‘hello’ and-“

“Did you not hear me?” Ashton said jerking his head to look at the man “I said get away from me…and I’m nothing like you” Ashton said thinking back to what his father said before.

“Sitting on the kitchen floor drunk, making your mother run out of the house crying…” Ashton looked to see his dad smirking “I’d say you are” and Ashton felt so much anger and hurt flaring up in him.

“Get. Away. From. Me” Ashton spat out and watched as his father put both hands up and slowly started to back up.

“Well it was-“ Ashton didn’t hear the rest of what his father was going to say because he quickly put both hands over his ears as he closed his eyes. He was just so sick of hearing him talk and seeing him standing in their kitchen. Ashton was so overwhelmed and just wanted it all to end.

He only took his hands off his ears and opened his eyes when he was sure that his father was gone.

Ashton put his knees up and let his forehead fall onto them as he took deep breaths. Everything seemed to hurt and all he wanted was one of his boys to be holding him right now.

It was quite rare that Ashton ever needed to be comforted but right now he felt like crying with how bad he needed it. He tried to picture Michael’s arms around him and Calum’s lips pecking kisses all over his face and Luke rubbing a hand through his hair as he kept whispering “it’s going to be alright”; but none of that was helping because none of it was actually happening. He couldn’t feel any of that; instead the only thing he could feel was the hard tile flooring beneath him and his heart thumping fast as his stomach churned. He honestly felt like he was going to throw up at any second but he couldn’t make himself stand up to run to the bathroom.

The combination of stress and the alcohol was what was making him so crazy because usually when he drank he was a bundle of joy and just laughed at everything and then just stared off into space the rest of the time.

That wasn’t the case now and Ashton regretted even having a sip of alcohol. He didn’t know why he let himself get out of control. He managed to pick his head up and he thought he counted four bottles of beer on the floor in front of him and was so confused. He only remembered drinking two beers and then he had the two glasses of Jack and Coke.

Ashton groaned and let his head fall against the fridge as he looked up at the ceiling. His brain was such a mess and he was only just now realizing how quiet the house really was. He turned his head as if he would be able to see the living room from here.

He didn’t even know where he got the strength but soon he was putting his palm on the fridge as he stood up slowly and he felt so dizzy that the floor was actually moving. Ashton couldn’t even remember the last time he was this drunk or if he had ever even been this drunk; he probably hadn’t been.

He managed to get to the doorway of the kitchen and looked out to see the living room completely empty. There was still hints that people had been here by the random green and red cups laying on every flat surface and Ashton looked all around to just really make sure that no one was here.

He walked slowly to the front window and looked out to not see even a single car in the driveway. So his mom had left Harry and Laruen here with him? He was so drunk that he could barely take care of himself let alone them. They were enough to take care of themselves but if anything bad happened Ashton wasn’t even sure he would be able to do anything since he could barely even walk, let alone drive them to the hospital or something.

Ashton kept telling himself to calm down and even said it out loud a couple of times before making it to the steps. He started to slowly walk up them and kept his hand gripping tight on the railing as he did.

Ashton made it up to the top and began to walk down the hallway. He seen that both Lauren and Harry’s rooms were empty and he felt himself relaxing. So they weren’t here and Ashton only had to worry about himself choking on his own puke in his sleep or other deathly things that would happen to drunk people.

When he got to his room it felt so foreign to him and his bed didn’t feel anything like Michael’s as he laid down. It wasn’t soft enough and Ashton hated not being able to feel one of the other boy’s body heat against him. He hated not being able to reach over and touch one of them or kiss them. Ashton groaned loudly and picked his phone out of his pocket. His background was a picture of just him and Luke as Luke had an arm around him and was kissing his cheek and Ashton had a huge smile on his face.

Ashton wished that he could smile like that right now and he knew he would if he at least had Calum and Michael with him. He opened up his last text from Michael and let his fingers hover over the keys.

He could easily just tell Michael to come get him, since he obviously couldn’t drive, and Ashton was about to text him to do just that but then he looked at the time at the top of his phone; it was almost midnight and he was sure that Calum and Michael were asleep. He would feel bad for waking them up at this time to come get his drunk ass. Not to mention that he didn’t want Calum and Michael to see him in this state. They always seen him as this person who always had it together. He was the person who always stayed strong for everyone else and Ashton refused to let them see him when he was feeling this weak; probably the weakest he’s ever felt and he threw his phone on the floor with a loud thump realizing that he just couldn’t text them right now. He would have to just tough it out until tomorrow and luckily Ashton felt his eyes beginning to close and couldn’t believe that he hadn’t passed out a long time ago.

The last thing Ashton remembered was desperately trying to picture Calum laying his head on his chest as he slept because that was almost always how he fell asleep.


	68. Calum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might have cried a bit while writing this chapter…don’t tell anyone that I actually have emotions

They were still laying in bed as the TV was on and Calum was covered up to his chin with the blanket while he was laying on Michael’s chest.

Last night him and Michael had just ate more pancakes and junk food until they both passed out on the couch with Calum lying entirely on Michael. Calum didn’t remember walking up to the bedroom so he knew that Michael had carried him up here while he was asleep and he thought that was so cute.

He burrowed his face into Michael’s chest a bit and the boy moved his fingers in his hair as he yawned.  
Calum was happy like this and could honestly just stay here all day but something else was bothering him. He had texted and called Ashton as soon as he woke up this morning but he never heard back from him. It was very unlike Ashton to do something like that and Calum was scared that something was wrong.

“Michael?” Calum spoke softly into his skin and Michael rubbed a hand down his back.

“Yeah, Cal?”

“M’ worried about Ashton” and he felt Michael let out a sigh.

“I kinda am too…he wouldn’t answer my calls either” and Calum just hummed a bit as Michael started to rub his palm down his back “Do you wanna head over to his house and see what’s going on?” Calum was nodding before Michael finished talking and then they were both getting out of bed.

They showered together quickly before they were heading out the door and getting into Michael’s jeep.

Calum couldn’t stop moving his leg while he was in the jeep and Michael kept looking at with a concerned face.

“I’m sure he’s just sleeping in, Cal; probably didn’t hear his phone go off” and Calum nodded; Michael was probably right and he was probably freaking out over nothing. Calum just wasn’t used to Ashton not responding to him so it was a new thing that he was dealing with.

It wasn’t long until they were pulling onto Ashton’s dead end road. He lived in the suburbs and all the house they drove by were way nice than Calum’s.

When they got in front of Ashton’s house Calum noticed that Ashton’s car was the only one in the driveway so this meant that he was here alone and Calum didn’t like that Ashton had probably spent the night here by himself. He wished that Ashton would have been curled up with him and Michael instead.

“Well he’s here” Michael said letting out a relieved sigh and Calum nodded.  
Right when Calum was about to open the door, because he just really wanted to see Ashton, Michael’s phone was going off and Calum looked at it even though he couldn’t see the text from here. He looked up to see Michael’s eyes skimming over it then he was letting out a breath “Shit”

“What?” Calum said right away because his tone worried Calum.

“My aunt wants me to pick her up from the airport” Calum knew the airport wasn’t very far but he had no idea how far way Michael’s aunt lived. Michael was then looking up at him “She doesn’t live too far from the airport but I gotta go get her right now”

“Well…” Calum looked to Ashton’s house “I can just go in there by myself. It’s just Ashton” and Calum knew that if Ashton’s mom was there he would probably be more scared to enter Ashton’s house; he just wasn’t good with new people.

“I’ll only be like a half hour then I’ll come back here” Michael said quickly as he reached out to pet a hand through Calum’s hair and Calum nodded

“Alright…” then Michael was looking past Calum “Hopefully the doors unlocked” he said with a slight chuckle.

After giving Michael a few kisses, because he could never get enough of them, Calum was then stepping out of the car and walking through the grass towards the front door. He could still hear Michael’s jeeps running as he got to the front porch and luckily turned the doorknob to see that it wasn’t locked.

He opened the door and looked back to Michael to give him a nod and then Michael was smiling and waving before he was driving off.

Calum for some reason felt nervous as he stepped inside and looked around a bit to see that the place was kind of a mess in a sense that it was obvious that a party had happened.

He started to climb the stairs and remembered quickly where Ashton’s bedroom was. He started to walk faster, just wanting to get to him already, and then he stopped at his doorway. Calum felt fear run through him when the bed was empty but the sheets and blankets were all messed up so it was obvious that he had been sleeping there before.

“Ash” Calum said quietly and looked around the room a couple times. He was about to just leave the room and look somewhere else until he seen that the bathroom door off of Ashton’s room was open by just a crack, like he had tried shutting it and failed.

Calum swallowed hard and was feeling scared of what he would see while he was in there. Maybe Ashton was already up and just taking a shower, but Calum felt like Ashton would have called him back if that was the case because he knew Ashton always checked his phone when he woke up.

Calum pushed the door open in one movement and gasped a bit at what he saw. Luckily he could see that Ashton was breathing but he still knew that something was very wrong and that last night had been really rough for Ashton.

Ashton was laying on the blue tiled floor in between the toilet and tub with only a small towel under his head as it was almost touching the bath tub. He was shirtless and in only a pair of boxers as he was curled up in a ball. Calum looked to the right a bit and seen that there was a bottle of mouth wash next to him like he had washed his mouth out and then was too exhausted to put it back on the counter.

Calum figured that the floor was cold and he hated knowing that Ashton was cold before he fell asleep but felt too tired to move to his bed. Calum had the flu before so he knew what it was like to feel sick like this but he was positive that Ashton didn’t have the flu. The smell of liquor was strong as soon as he walked into the bathroom and Calum didn’t even know that Ashton was the type to drink this heavily so he became even more worried.

Calum got right in front of Ashton and sat down on the floor with his back against the bath tub as he instantly started to run his hands through Ashton’s messy hair that still had knots in it from sleep. He then trailed his fingers down the boy’s bare back and only then did Ashton start to move his head a bit. Calum rubbed the back of his hand on Ashton’s cheek and watched as Ashton’s eyes began to flicker open and then close again so he went back to rubbing at his hair.

“C-Cal, baby” Ashton’s voice was even more rough sounding than usual and it sounded like it was even hurting him to talk. He still had his eyes closed like he couldn’t even open them and Calum hated seeing him like this and just wished there was something he could do to make Ashton feel better.

“Yeah I’m here” Calum whispered because he just had to say something to the boy. He then started rubbing the tips of his fingers down Ashton’s arm and felt goosebumps begin to form there.

Calum was a bit surprised when Ashton began to slowly sit up, with his eyes still closed, and then he was just barely opening them as he slid closer to Calum and then he practically collapsed against Calum with his head on the boys’ chest and his face burrowed in his neck. Ashton wrapped an arm around his torso and then he was heavily breathing like just that little amount of movement had him feeling like he was going to pass out. Calum wrapped both arms around his back and held him as he pressed kisses to his hair and he heard the boy whimper.

“Missed you” Ashton whispered and Calum knew his eyes were closing again as he let out a breath.

“Missed you too” Calum swallowed hard and he could smell the mouthwash on Ashton’s breath as he was still breathing heavily out of his mouth. Calum moved one hand to cup the back of Ashton’s head and held him tight so the boy knew that he was still there.  
Calum was sure that Ashton was going to fall asleep if they sat here any longer and he didn’t want the boy once again falling asleep on the floor. He deserved to be in a warm comfy bed so Calum rubbed at his back a bit.

“Let’s get you back to bed” Calum said softly but Ashton just held him tighter.

After a few minutes Ashton did start to move and he grabbed his knee as he sat up like it was sore from sitting in that position for too long. Calum really took in how tired Ashton looked; his eyes were beat red and the bags under his eyes were so dark.

Calum wrapped both arms around Ashton’s torso as he slowly began to help the boy stand up and Calum knew that Ashton was trying his hardest to help him but he just didn’t have the strength.

When they were all the way stood up Ashton leaned fully into Calum as they walked out of the bathroom and it already felt warmer as soon as they were into the bedroom again. He put the blankets back and slowly helped Ashton sit down and then Ashton was lying on his side as he faced away, knowing that Calum would be sliding in on the other side and he wanted to be able to face him.

Calum got on the bed on the other side and slid in close to Ashton and instantly wrapped one arm around his waist as he began putting the softest kisses all over his face. Calum then moved on to kissing his shoulder and chest as he kept rubbing a hand on Ashton’s back.

Calum only stopped doing these things when he heard Ashton sniffle and Calum’s heart broke in half at hearing that.

He leaned back and seen that half of Ashton’s face was pressed into the pillow and his eyes were pinched shut like he was trying so hard to keep the tears from falling. One fell anyway and Calum didn’t hesitate to move his finger to Ashton’s cheek to wipe it away. Ashton was then taking a deep breath and Calum could tell how hard he was trying to stop crying.

“Ash, you don’t always have to be so strong” Calum whispered and Ashton rubbed a hand over his face before slowly beginning to open his eyes.

“Yeah I do” Ashton whispered and Calum just shook his head before laying his head on Ashton’s pillow as he kissed his cheek a few times then leaned back to see that Ashton was pinching his eyes shut again.

“Hey…” Calum touched Ashton’s cheek but he still didn’t open his eyes “it’s okay to cry” and that just had Ashton shaking his head but he still seemed so guarded “Ash please talk to me…You’re so hurt and I wanna help you” Ashton sniffled again and bit hard at his quivering lip before opening his eyes and Calum moved the hand that had never stopped rubbing at Ashton’s back to rub at his arm instead.

“My mom hates me” was all that Ashton said and Calum felt speechless but then Ashton was saying more after he looked away from Calum for a few seconds “My brother hates me too…hell, my dad probably even hates me. I was probably the reason he left”

“Ashton….no” Calum started shaking his head as he pinched his own eyes shut for a few seconds “If they can’t see how amazing you are then they don’t even deserve to have you around. You’re the best person I know, Ash and if they can’t see that then that’s their fault; not yours. You didn’t do anything wrong” Ashton opened his mouth like he wanted to say something but his lip just ended up quivering again and Calum leaned forward to kiss him as he cupped his cheek. Ashton melted into the kiss and let out a quiet whimper when Calum moved his hand on his back again to bring Ashton closer “You’re…” Calum paused to put a few kissed down Ashton’s jaw “so special, Ashton and I just wish you could see that” Calum was then facing him and Ashton’s eyes seemed to be even redder than before.

Ashton just stared at Calum without saying a word and then he was moving and pressing himself right against Calum’s chest as he wrapped both arms around his back and clung to him like his life depended on it. He buried his face in the crook of Calum’s neck and Calum instantly held him back just as tight as he rubbed at his back. Calum heard Ashton sniffle again and then he felt wetness against his skin as Ashton actually started to suck in breaths from how hard he was crying. Calum felt tears swell up in his own eyes and there was no stopping them.

“I love you s-so much, Ashton” Calum whimpered out as he kept pressing kisses on the top of Ashton’s head and that only made Ashton cry even more but Calum knew he needed to get all of it out “I still remember the night you took me home after that football game. For once in my life I actually felt like things were going to be okay and it was all because you. I can’t thank you enough for that…for saving me” and it was true. Ashton saved Calum that night. Before he had met Ashton his life felt so pointless and he felt so unwanted and unloved. It would have only been a matter of time before Calum would have lost the want to live because of how useless he felt; but then Ashton came around and changed all of that.

“Fuck, C-Cal” Ashton whispered as he leaned up to places kissed on his shoulder before leaning back and looking at him “You’ve showed me what it feels like to be really loved…and I’ve-“ Ashton closed his eyes for a few seconds and bit his lip again “I’ve never had that before” Ashton was then cupping Calum’s cheeks and kissing him softly “And I know I’ve loved you ever since we first met that night” tears were still streaming down his face and Calum knew he was crying as well. Calum reached forward to wipe away more of Ashton’s tears then Calum did a weak smile.

“Me too” and Calum knew that he had. As soon as he got in the car with Ashton that night he had felt something for him. It was only later that he realized that feeling was “love”. Ashton did a soft smile back at him before wiping his own eyes and leaning forward to give Calum a slightly more deepened kiss as he rubbed a hand through his hair and kissed Calum slow. They only leaned back when they were short of breath and Ashton instantly leaned his forehead against Calum’s.

“I love you so much, Calum” Ashton whispered as his shut his eyes hard again and another tear ran down his cheek.

“And I love you” Calum said back and he kissed Ashton hard again like they were kissing for the very first time.

After their lips were starting to get sore Ashton moved his lips to Calum’s neck and just touched every inch of it as he was then pressing himself up against Calum again and Calum was holding him like before. Ashton stilled his lips and just breathed hard and his hot breath was giving Calum chills but it was so comforting.

Ashton moved up a bit and rested his head on the pillow so that his head was right below Calum’s chin and Calum kept rubbing fingers on his back and then would switch up to his hair until he felt Ashton’s heavy breathing against him, knowing the boy was asleep. Calum kissed his head and made sure to cover him up as he rubbed a hand up and down Ashton’s arm.  
“I love you” Calum whispered once more before feeling himself drift off as well.


	69. Michael

Michael felt so relieved when he finally got back to Ashton’s house. His aunt had of course drove him nuts the whole time she was in the car and all Michael wanted to do was see his boys. He got out of the car quick and jogged up to Ashton’s front door. Since his aunt had insisted on stopping the get food he was gone for a bit longer than a half hour like he had told Calum but he hoped the boy was okay with it; he was sure he was if he was with Ashton.

Michael slipped in the front door and immediately walked into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water because he felt like he was dying of thirst. He found one in the fridge with no problem but stopped drinking when he looked down to the floor to see four bottles of beer in front of him. He knew Ashton wasn’t a big drinker so maybe they weren’t even his but for some reason Michael had a feeling they were.

Bad thoughts were rushing into his head as he began to think that maybe Ashton had a horrible time last night and Michael started to feel really bad for talking him into going. Michael didn’t even want Ashton to leave last night, not at all, but for once he decided to stop being so selfish and figured that Ashton’s siblings should get a chance to see him.

Instead of worrying about it any longer Michael downed the rest of the water and threw it away before making his way upstairs.

He stopped at the doorway and looked to see Ashton and Calum laying on their sides facing each other as Ashton had his face burrowed into Calum’s neck as he held on tight to him. Michael had a bad feeling that something had happened and Calum was comforting him.

Michael stepped into the room and carefully laid on the other side of Ashton as he looked at the sleeping boy’s. He softly started to rub his hand through the back of Ashton’s hair and kept looking up to see if either of them woke up. They both seemed to be pretty tired so Michael gave a few kisses to the back of Ashton’s head and then slid down the bed a bit to put his arm around Ashton’s waist as he began to close his eyes.

Michael was just starting to drift off when he felt a hand slowly trailing up and down his arm and just judging by the size of it he knew it was Ashton’s and he hummed a bit. Michael seen that Ashton opened his mouth, seeming like he wanted to say something and Michael knew he had to get it all out so he softly started rubbing his hand up Ashton’s stomach, knowing it always comforted the boy.

“Nothing I do will ever be good enough for her” Ashton said weakly and Michael had no idea where any of this was coming from.

“Who?” Michael spoke into Ashton’s hair.

“My mom” he took a deep breath “While she was off partying every night I was at home taking care of Lauren and Harry and she had the nerve to call me ‘selfish’. I just don’t understand her” Ashton seemed to be more angry than sad now and Michael wished there was something he could do to make him feel better; he was never good with words. Instead he started pressing light kisses to the back of Ashton’s hair as he kept moving his hand on his stomach and he seen the boy starting to close his eyes again.

“You’re not selfish, Ash” Michael whispered “Not even close. You have such a kind heart and just because not everyone sees that, it doesn’t mean that it’s not true. If your mom were to see how much you’ve cared for your siblings over the years then she would see how much she’s failed as a parent and that’s something that she doesn’t want to admit to herself” and Michael watched as Ashton got a slight smile on his face and then he was grabbing Michael’s hand and intertwining it with his.

“Thank you” Ashton spoke just barely over a whisper and Michael kissed his cheek as he got even closer to him “After Cal wakes up I wanna go back to your house. I don’t even consider this place home anymore”

“We can go home” Michael said back and then he watched as Ashton seemed content as he closed his eyes again. Michael bent down a bit to press a few kisses to his shoulder and then burrowed his face into the back of Ashton’s neck before feeling his eyes shut as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Luke comes back in the next chapter woo! (Sorry for delayed updates. Idk if I've already said this but I was forced to move out of my dads house so I live with my mom now and she doesn't have internet so I barely ever get to use it unless I go to some coffee shop. Basically I'm miserable lmao anyways thank you to everyone who has stuck by this monster of a fic. I never imaged it would be this long but I'm just rolling with it)


	70. Luke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LUKE IS BACK I REPEAT LUKE IS BACK. I know how much you guys missed him so I hope you love this chapter (it's 3am right now but I can't sleep as per usual so I decided to update)

Luke got so excited as soon as they got into the city limits of where they lived. He was smiling wide at thinking of how amazing it would feel to be with his boy’s again and be able to be held by them and just be around them again.

His parents were bickering about something in the front seat but it was so easy for Luke to block them out with how good of a mood he was in. He was finally coming home and he couldn’t wait.

He looked out the window at all the familiar buildings passed by and he even felt happy when they passed his school because he actually missed it a bit if he was being honest.

Yesterday Luke had said he was coming home soon but he didn’t specify the exact day so he knew the boy’s would be surprised that he was coming home today.

Luke knew he was only gone for a little over a week but he still wondered if any of the boy’s would look different to him. He knew Michael had dyed his hair, and he couldn’t wait to see it in person, but he wondered if Ashton and Calum would look different to him too.

He then remembered that they didn’t even go back to school until four more days and he also remembered Ashton telling him that they would all do something together when he got back and Luke couldn’t wait. He honestly would be totally fine with just lounging around the house with the boy’s doing nothing in particular but Luke knew that Ashton had something bigger planned for them.

Ashton had actually been the last person that Luke talked to on the phone and he couldn’t help but notice that something was off about the usually happy and energetic boy. He seemed sad and emotionally drained and Luke just really wanted to hold him and kiss him. He hoped that Ashton was doing okay.

When his dad pulled into their driveway Luke was the first to get out of the car and he quickly grabbed his bags out of the trunk before walking quickly to the door because the faster he got unpacked the sooner he could go over to Michael’s house.

The smell of his house was strong as he walked inside and he actually really missed being in an actual home; the hotel room they were staying in was nice and all but it wasn’t the same.

Luke was actually shocked at how fast he unpacked all his clothes, he was doing it now because he knew it wouldn’t ever get done if he didn’t, and then he was quickly rummaging through his closet as he looked for a change of clothes.  
He finally decided on a black band shirt and a red and black flannel with the black skinny jeans that he always wore.

When he was turning away from the closet he spotted the black button down shirt he wore to his brother’s homecoming party and remembered how much Ashton liked him in that shirt. He bit at his lip a bit and thought that it was way too dressy for just hanging out but also knew it would make Ashton happy, since it was obvious that he needed cheering up.

Luke finally shrugged off his flannel and took his black shirt off before letting them drop to the floor.

He took the black button down off the hanger and slipped it on as he stood in the mirror and left the top two buttons unbuttoned and looked at his collar bones showing a bit. Luke fluffed his hair up a bit and didn’t know why he was feeling so nervous. For some reason it felt like he was going on a date for the very first time. These were his boyfriends though that he was very familiar with so he had no reason to worry.

Luke decided to just put a snapback on backwards because it made him look less dressy and then he was finally grabbing his phone and car keys.

He almost forgot to grab the decorated bag that was filled with the boy’s Christmas presents and he cursed to himself before grabbing it off the nightstand and then leaving his bedroom.

Luckily his mom didn’t see him as he slipped out the door because he knew she would just start talking his ear off, wondering where he was going.

When he got to Michael’s house Luke couldn’t stop smiling up at it. He knew his boy’s were in there and he didn’t know why he was still sitting out here staring up at it while he should be in there already.

He quickly opened the door and nervously fixed his hair as he walked up the sidewalk.  
He began to wonder if they would act different since they hadn’t seen Luke for a week. Luke was sure that they wouldn’t but there was still something in the back of his head that was telling him otherwise.

Luke gulped as he reached for the doorknob and for some reason he was about to knock but then he remembered that he never knocked when he came over so why should this time be any different?

He twisted the doorknob and instantly felt like he was floating on a cloud as he stepped into the house with the high ceiling. He couldn’t stop smiling but he thought it was a bit strange how the entire house was silent.

Michael and Ashton’s cars were both in the driveway so he knew they were here but he didn’t see them anywhere in sight. It was almost 8pm so it seemed like a weird time to have a nap but knowing them maybe they were napping.

Luke went around in the kitchen and checked in there just in case but still they were nowhere.  
He started climbing the stairs and it was only then that he started to hear a bit of noise. He smiled when he could tell it was Calum’s giggles coming from the direction of Michael’s room.

“-and then I tossed it back to him and he somehow, by the grace of god , caught it and that was how we won the homecoming game” Luke smiled even wider when he heard Ashton’s voice and he picked up the pace, just needing to see his boy’s already.

Luke took a deep breath right before he got to the doorway of Michael’s bedroom and then he could see them. He felt a warmness, that he hadn’t felt the entire time he was away, wash over him as he could see Michael and Calum sat against the headboard of the bed sitting as close as they could without laying on top of each other and Ashton was standing in front of the bed with his back to Luke as he pretended to throw a football as he still went on with his story.

It was Calum who seen Luke first and his eyes widened as he got a sad smile on his face and then he was sitting up and mouthing

“Luke” and Luke smiled and nodded as he closed his eyes for a few seconds.

They were all somehow even more beautiful than when he left.

Only a few seconds where Calum was shocked went by before he was jumping off the bed and throwing himself into Luke’s arms. Luke held him tightly and buried his face in Calum’s neck as he rubbed his back and felt happy tears already forming. He looked up to now see Michael and Ashton with their mouths open as they looked speechless.

“L-Lukey” Ashton said weakly before he was running over to Luke too and squeezing Calum between the two of them as he pressed kisses all over Luke’s face and held onto his back.

“I missed you guys so much” Luke whimpered and Ashton and Calum both rubbed at his back. Luke then realized that there was only four arms around him and he quickly looked up to see Michael just beginning to get up off the bed as he looked at Luke with wide eyes. He had his hands crossed and kept moving his fingers around which was something he did when he was nervous and Luke had no idea why he would be nervous.

Ashton and Calum were suddenly looking back as well and then Luke took his eyes briefly off Michael when he seen Ashton slowly removing Calum off of Luke and they were backing up from him as if they were giving Michael a chance to hug him by himself.

Luke looked back to see Michael smiling wide as he closed his eyes and in an instant he was fast walking over to Luke and wrapping his arms tightly around his shoulders.

“I can’t believe you’re here” Michael whispered as he moved his face from Luke’s neck to rest his forehead against Luke’s cheek “I missed you so fucking much, baby” Michael said holding him even tighter and Luke felt his eyes starting to burn a bit and he pinched them shut.

Just by the way Michael was holding him Luke could tell how much pain he had been in while he was away and it killed him.

Apparently time away wasn’t a thing that any of the boy’s could handle and Luke hoped that never had to deal with it again.

He knew they would have to deal with it in just a few short months but he again pushed those terrible thoughts away and pressed kisses to Michael’s hair as he heard the boy sniffle.

He looked up to see Ashton and Calum smiling at the two of them and Luke could tell they wanted to be in on the hug too and honestly he felt like he didn’t get to hug them long enough.

“I wanna cuddle with my boy’s” Luke said smiling and then nodding towards the bed and Michael just nodded against him and soon they were all making their way towards the bed.

*

It was almost midnight now and they were all still on Michael’s bed.

They had opened Luke’s gifts that he got for them and Luke felt bad because they weren’t much but they all kept assuring him that all they cared about was that he was back with them and Luke felt like crying happy tears again.

Luke was squished in between Calum and Michael now as he watched Ashton walk over to Michael’s closet to retrieve Luke’s present. Luke had said that they really didn’t need to get him anything but they all just rolled their eyes at that.

Luke was starting to get excited as Ashton brought over the nicely wrapped present. Ashton was then sitting back on the bed next to Michael as he faced Luke and handed over them medium sized box.

“You guys really didn’t need to-“

“Just open it” Michael laughed and Luke just smiled before obeying him.

He began to unwrap it and then he was met with just a cardboard box and Ashton nodded, urging him to open it. Luke could feel Michel’s hand rubbing at his thigh as Calum’s hand was on his back and God, Luke missed these soft little touches so much. His mouth dropped open when he seen what was in the cardboard box.

“Guys” he whimpered and then he was bringing the object out on his lap. It was something he had always wanted but never had enough money to afford.

“We all pitched in to get it for you” Ashton said softly and Luke beamed up at him before looking back down at the Polaroid camera. He knew straight away that the only pictures he would take with this would be pictures of his boys; the three loves of his life.

“Thank you so much” he whispered and he felt the bed sloping down a bit as Ashton leaned forward and kissed the side of his mouth and then his cheek. Luke felt goosebumps all over his whole body and it had felt like the very first time he had kissed Ashton.

Luke couldn’t help but lean forward and bring Ashton into a real kiss and then when they came back to breath Luke looked down to see Calum and Michael fondly looking up at them.

*

Luke spent several minutes just making the boy’s do silly poses on the bed as he kept taking photos of them and he could feel his eyes getting heavier by the second from all the traveling but he just didn’t want to go to sleep yet. He had missed out on so much time with the boy’s and he needed to make up for it; sleeping would just throw away the extra time he could be spending with them.

Michael was now sitting up as Luke leaned against his chest and Calum’s head was on Luke’s lap as Luke kept running his fingers through his dark hair. Ashton was seated next to Michael and Luke felt himself smiling when he looked down to see Ashton rubbing circles on Michael’s thighs.

Luke closed his eyes for a few seconds to just soak all of this in and felt himself getting even more tired so he quickly opened his eyes.

“You looked tired, Lukey” Ashton’s deep voice suddenly broke the silence and Luke just nodded before looking up at him “Let’s get to sleep then” he said starting to get under the covers and then Calum was rubbing at Luke’s thigh before sitting up and getting under them as well.

“Wanna spend more time with you guys though” Luke said sadly and he hated how tired he sounded because it wasn’t exactly helping him convince the boy’s that he wanted to stay up longer.

“We’ve got all the time in the world, Luke” Ashton smiled widely at him and Luke felt a warmness going through him. He had missed Ashton’s smile so much.

Luke realized that what Ashton had said wasn’t completely true but he didn’t want to think about that so he just pretended that they did have all the time in the world.

He looked down to see Michael laying down now too and he began brushing his fingers across Luke’s lower back as his eyelids were starting to close.

Thinking about curling up next to all of them was what made Luke want to lay down and he got under the covers and then he was rolling to face Calum as he pressed a few soft kisses across the boy’s cheeks and then kissed his lips and Calum let out a content humming noise as he rubbed at Luke’s arms.

With how all the boy’s were touching him it made him feel like it was their first night together all over again; maybe they had always touched him like this though and Luke had just become accustomed to it. He smiled into the kiss before turning on his side to face Michael but bringing Calum’s arm over his waist.

He let out a content sigh he felt Calum pressing up against him and then pressing his face into his hair.

“Where’s my kiss?” Ashton said resting on his elbows and raising his eyebrows at Luke. Luke just giggled and sat up a bit as he leaned over Michael and brought Ashton into a deep kiss and he felt a chill run down his back as Ashton’s hand came to rest at the back of his hair as he kissed him with even more passion.

Luke let out a little whimper when Ashton breathed heavily into his mouth like he was already out of breath and then he was diving forward again.

“God, you guys are fucking hot” Michael moaned out and Luke giggled into Ashton’s mouth and then he separated from Ashton to look down at Michael. Michael had both arms behind his head as he looked dreamily up at them and Luke was just taking everything in. He couldn’t stop looking at all three of them and he was convinced that he had the most beautiful boyfriends in the entire world; he was so lucky and still wasn’t sure what he did right in his life to deserve all of them.

Michael smiled at Luke, who still hadn’t torn his eyes away from the pink haired boy, like he knew exactly what he was thinking.

Luke looked back to Ashton and his cheeks looked a bit rosy as he bit at his lip and Luke couldn’t help but press another few pecks to his lips and Ashton did a low chuckle before kissing down his jaw and then rubbing a hand through his hair.

“I don’t think I can ever handle being away from you again” Ashton spoke lowly and was almost whispering it “And I know Michael and Calum agree” Luke nodded and then looked down to see Calum and Michael both giving him sad looks.

“I couldn’t handle it either” Luke whispered back and Ashton gave him a smile back before he was kissing his forehead and then urging Luke to lay down.

Luke laid his head down on Michael’s chest as he felt Calum’s arm tightening a bit around his waist and Luke smiled as he took a deep breath.

Michael’s hand came up to start rubbing up and down his hair and Luke knew he would be falling asleep at any moment.

“We’ve got a big weekend ahead of us, boy’s so we better rest up” Ashton suddenly said and it had all the boy’s looking up at him with questioning stares.

“What’re you talking about?” Michael chuckled and Luke watched as Ashton slid closer to Michael to start rubbing a hand on his stomach then he started to close his eyes.

“I promised you that we’d all go somewhere when Luke got back” Ashton said before a yawn and then he was kissing Michael’s temple “I always keep my promises” and Luke smiled at that. His smile only began to falter when he thought about asking Ashton to promise them that he would always be here but Luke knew that was way too selfish to ask him something like that. Luke had to be strong but he also had no idea why he was all of a sudden thinking so hard about the fact that Ashton was leaving for college at the end of the summer. He knew it had to be because he was finally seeing them and he remembered how hard it was to be away from them for only a week.

Luke tried to stop his negative thoughts and just focused on the Now. Right now he had the three boys that he loved more than anything and he didn’t want to waste a second of on thinking about bad thoughts like Ashton leaving them.

Luke took another deep breath and cuddled into Michael’s chest as he felt the pink haired boy kiss the top of his head.

“I’ll never leave you guys again” was the last thing that Luke remembered saying before his exhaustion began to catch up with him.

*

Luke woke up to the feeling of a hand slowly going through his hair and he had no idea what had woken him up until he heard the loud thunder shake the house and then Calum was flinching behind him.

He also realized that it was still dark out and that the hand in his hair was Michael’s.

Luke kissed the boy’s chest and the he was sitting up a bit so that he could look at Michael. Michael looked so exhausted and his eyes were even red like he had been crying which really worried Luke.

“Michael, are you okay?” he whispered and Michael just kept tiredly blinking up at him as his hand moved down to rub at Luke’s back.

“I just really missed you sleeping next to me” Michael’s voice cracked a bit and then he was swallowing hard “I didn’t want it to end yet”

“Michael” Luke said with a sad smile “I missed it too” he said moving a bit so his face was right above Michael’s and then he was leaning down to press a kiss to Michael’s lips and then nose and Michael’s hand instantly went to the back of his hair.

Luke leaned just a bit to look at Michael and then Michael’s other hand was going to his cheeks as the backs of his fingers softly rubbed up and down them. Michael started tracing every inch of Luke’s face with his fingers like he was trying to memorize him and Luke closed his eyes at the soothing touch and only opened them when Michael was speaking again.

“Missed this too” Michael moved to cup Luke’s cheek and leaned forward to kiss his lips “Missed seeing your beautiful face every day” Luke closed his eyes again before leaning his forehead against Michael’s and then Michael was putting both his hands on Luke’s face as he gave him the most lightest kiss on the lips.

Luke deepened the kiss a bit and felt one of Michael’s hand moving to his neck as he let out a breath and then kissed Luke more fiercely than before

“Mmm” Michael hummed into the kiss and dipped his tongue into Luke’s mouth “Missed my angel so much” and Luke couldn’t help but moan out at the pet name and Michael smirked against his lips before kissing him hard again.

At this point Luke was half on top of Michael with their legs intertwined and he was breathing heavily as he went to rest his head back on Michael’s chest and Michael instantly wrapped both arms around him and held him tightly like he was scared he was going to disappear again.

“The whole time you were gone all I could do was hope that you weren’t as miserable as I was” Michael’s voice came out sounding rough and Luke peppered kisses across his neck.

“Well I was” Luke spoke seriously and Michael let out a breath. 

“God I just couldn’t fucking handle it so I have no idea how I’m gonna handle-“ and Michael stopped dead in his tracks when Ashton suddenly moved a bit only to just nuzzle his face further into the pillow. Luke knew exactly what Michael was going to say though because he had been thinking about the same thing all night. Luke picked his head up to look at Michael again.  
“I know” was all Luke could think of to say and then he was looking over at Ashton. Luke couldn’t help but rub a hand through the curly haired boys’ hair and then ran the back of his hand down his cheek. Luke leaned over Michael a bit more to press a kiss to Ashton’s temple and then he was grabbing Ashton’s hand that was still resting on Michael’s stomach and he intertwined their fingers before looking back to Michael.

Michael was looking down at their hands on his stomach and Luke seen him visibly swallow.

Luke kissed Michael again and kissed him until he was short of breath, just like before, and then he was laying his head back down on his chest as he looked down at his and Ashton’s hands.

Luke began to doze off again as Michael’s hand began to card through his hair again and soon Luke was back to a world where Ashton would always be with them.


	71. Michael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Double update cause I feel like this update took a while (My home life has just been so stressful ugh so it's very hard for me to focus and write) Hope you guys love these chapters! (Sidenote: I have a Mashton fic in progress just a heads up and I'm really excited for it but don't worry I'll still finish this cause I have big plans for it and this fic is my baby)

“Michael Gordon Clifford if you don’t get out of this bed I’m going to drag you out of it” was the first thing Michael heard when he woke up the next morning and as his eyes flickered opened he realized he was the only one left in the bed. He looked to his right to see Ashton standing above him as he dramatically crossed his arms across his chest and Michael just chuckled a bit before pressing his face back into the pillow.

“Just carry me” Michael’s voice was muffled and he heard Ashton scoff.

“Come on, you’ll miss out on all the fun” and Michael obviously wanted to go wherever they were all going but he just felt so tired and needed just a few more minutes.

“Just let me sleep for a little bit longer” he whined.

“It’s a long drive and I wanna get on the road” Ashton shot back and Michael couldn’t believe how much of a Dad he was sometimes.

“Fine” Michael groaned before sitting up and then holding his head when he felt dizzy “Take a shower with me then”

“I took a shower 3 hours ago when me, Luke and Calum got up” Ashton chuckled and Michael rolled his eyes.

“You guys took a group shower without me?”

“We tried to wake you up, Michael”

“Well I don’t remember that” he shot back as he stood up and ran a hand through his hair.

“Just get in the shower and then come downstairs” Ashton said before smacking his ass and turning towards the door “I already packed for you” and Michael smiled at that.

“Thanks” he said rubbing at the back of his neck and watching Ashton leave. He doesn’t even know what he would do without Ashton honestly. Michael was then quickly shaking off the thoughts of what him and Luke talked about last night because he didn’t want to get depressed again.

He took a quick shower just like Ashton had told him too and then he was quickly slipping on jeans and a hoodie before making his way downstairs.

He stopped in the doorway of the kitchen when he seen how domestic the whole situation was. Ashton was leaned over the stove as he flipped a pancake and Luke and Calum were both eating at the counter with their glasses of chocolate milk in front of them. Michael thought that the whole scene was the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.

He walked into the room and walked behind Calum as he gave the back of his head a few kisses and Calum smiled back at him before Michael was kissing Luke’s cheek and the boy giggled before Michael sat on the other side of him.

Ashton was then coming walking up to them with another plateful of pancakes and Michael went to reach for one but then Ashton was smacking his hand away. Luke and Calum both giggled but Michael looked up at Ashton with an offended stare.

“Where’s my morning kiss?” Ashton spoke in a serious voice but Michael laughed.

“Well I didn’t want to disrupt your cooking” he said leaning over the counter and giving him a peck on the lips a few times and then moved his head to kiss Ashton’s cheek before sitting back in his chair and Ashton gave him a few pancakes on his plate.

“So where are we going?” Calum asked with a mouth full after Ashton was now seated next to Michael as he ate a few pancakes of his own.

“It’s a surprise” Ashton said back before taking a few sips of his milk.

“You’re so predictable” Michael said looking at him as he fondly rolled his eyes and Ashton just smiled before going back to his food.

Within a half hour they were all walking out of the house and Michael was locking the front door behind him which was a thing he barely ever did but he knew they would be gone for a couple days so it was the smart move. He watched the back of Ashton’s head as he made his way towards the drivers seat and Michael was heading towards the passenger side like he always did but then Ashton’s voice was stopping him right before he was about to open the door.

“Let Luke have the front seat” Ashton spoke with a slight smile and Michael just let out a breath and nodded, realizing that it was only fair. It was just that Michael tended to get car sick if he sat in the back but he knew Luke would let him sit up there if he started feeling sick. Michael slid in the backseat next to Calum and had to move an extra bag of Ashton’s that was on the floor before he had any feet room. Calum seemed to be bouncing in his seat as Ashton started to pull out and Michael realized that this would be their first road trip together. Michael still wasn’t sure where they were going but honestly he didn’t care as long as he was with his boys.

Michael didn’t even remember falling asleep but realized he did when he was opening his eyes and they were all blurry as he could tell Ashton’s car was coming to a stop. The sun was slightly higher in the sky now and he could see that the scenery outside was quite a bit different than it was at home. They were pulling into a small gas station and across the street he could see thick woods. He looked over to see Calum asleep with his head tilted back on the seat and Michael put a blanket over him before sitting up and putting his elbows on the middle consol in the front seat.

“Where are we?” Michael said tiredly as he rubbed at his eyes and then leaned his face against Ashton’s arm.

“About a half hour from the coast” Ashton spoke as he rubbed a hand in Michael’s hair and Michael smiled. It had been so long since he seen the ocean and he couldn’t wait “We had to stop though cause Luke is starving” and Luke chuckled a bit.

“Do you want anything?” Luke said looking back at Michael and Michael never got tired of looking into his eyes.

“Oh…yeah” Michael finally said “Just a water and some Dorritos” Luke just smiled and nodded before him and Ashton were stepping out of the car. Michael watched as Ashton walked ahead of Luke on the sidewalk outside of the gas station and then Ashton was opening the door and letting Luke walk in first before they were disappearing inside.

Michael fell back in the seat and began to look around outside a bit more. It was crazy how different it looked around here. He loved where he lived but he would do anything to live near the coast. It was just so beautiful around here. He rolled his window down and was instantly greeted by the fresh ocean air and the strong scent of pine trees. It was so relaxing and Michael closed his eyes as the breeze hit his face. Typically it had been pretty cold but right now it felt like it was in the uppter 50’s and Michael was loving it. Suddenly Calum was whimpering a bit and Michael opened his eyes to see that Calum was moving his head a bit and then he was rubbing both his eyes with closed fists. Michael smiled and reached over to swipe the boys’ hair from his face and then Calum was looking over at him.

“Are we almost there?” Calum said in a rough voice and Michael nodded.

“Yeah, Ash said it would be about a half hour”

“Did he say where we’re going?”

“Well I know we’re going to the coast” Michael said tiredly and then he was looking back up at Calum who seemed to be more alert as he sat up.

“We get to see the ocean?”

“Yeah” Michael chuckled “You excited?”

“Mhm” Calum nodded quickly as he smiled and Michael couldn’t help but lean forward and press a peck to his lips. He leaned his arm against the top of the seat as he still kept his face close to the brown haired boys’ “I’ve never seen it before” and Michael smiled before kissing him again. He couldn’t wait to see how excited Calum looked when they finally got to the ocean.

*

Michael had his eyes on his phone on his lap when he heard Calum gasp next to him and he quickly looked over to boy, worried that something was wrong, but all he could see was pure joy on his face. Michael smiled at the way he was flicking his eyes all over as gaze was fixed on something outside the window; that something being the ocean.

Michael looked out his own window as they were crossing a wide bridge and the dark blue water went on for miles as the sun reflected off of it. It had felt like the sun hadn’t shined in years and Michael closed his eyes for a few seconds as he felt the warmth of it.

“I wish we could go swimming in it” Calum suddenly said sadly and Michael was about to say something but looked up towards the front to see Ashton eyeing Calum in his rear view mirror.

“Once summer gets here I swear we’ll come back here, pup” he spoke in a slow and tired voice and Michael wished he would have offered to drive for a bit; although he wasn’t sure if Ashton would let him anyways since he was stubborn and this was “his idea”. Michael for some reason continued to look at Ashton in the mirror as he drove and watched the way he squinted when he turned the car so that the sun was shining directly in his eyes. At the most random times Michael felt a very strong need to be close to Ashton and just feel his touch and right now was one of those times.

Ashton was suddenly looking back at him in the mirror and Michael was feeling shy and wanted to look away and act like he hadn’t been staring for the past few minutes but he kept his eyes on Ashton’s. The curly haired boy was then doing a slight crooked smile and Michael returned it before Ashton was looking back to the road. He started to look around at all the scenery as they drove through this small coastal town that had light color schemes to all of its buildings and it was comforting. Michael again rolled down his window and the fresh ocean breeze was even stronger this time. There wasn’t even a single cloud in the sky and Michael couldn’t even remember the last time they had such a nice day like this; he hoped that the rest of their time here was like this too.

Soon they could see the beach and they were pulling into a dirt driveway. The white house was two stories with a deck that went all the way around it and there didn’t seem to be any other house around it. The beach and the grass in the backyard met but were slightly divided by a few bushes. It wasn’t too big of a house but it wasn’t small either and Michael really felt like he could live here. It would be amazing to live this close to the beach.

“We have arrived” Ashton said happily as he shut off the car and all of the boy’s were just gazing up at the house through the front window. Michael was then looking to Ashton and he hoped that he would elaborate more “My aunt agreed to let us stay in her beach house for the next couple days”

“Just…for free?” Luke said in a confused voice as he raised his eyebrows at Ashton. Michael leaned forward in his seat and let his head fall against Luke’s shoulder, feeling tired from the long car ride.

“Yeah” Ashton chuckled and then he was rubbing his hand through his hair “She owes me a couple favors”

*

As soon as they stepped into the house with all their bags Michael was amazed at how even more beautiful the house was on the inside. The living room was had three matching tan couches and the big entertainment center that held the TV was in front of a floor to ceiling window that covered the entire back window. Michael looked to the left and seen the white painted staircase and the chipped white railing. Only a few second went by before Luke and Calum were dropping their bags onto the floor and running over to the window and with the way both of their faces were pressed up against the glass it reminded Michael of the time they all went to the aquarium and he smiled. He knew this little vacation of theirs was going to be amazing.


	72. Ashton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been too long since Luke and Ashton had some fun ;)

“Now, about the rooms…” Ashton began as he stretched his arms over his head “There’s two rooms but there’s only double beds in the rooms so we won’t be able to all share one like we do at home”

“So how shall we settle the room situation?” Michael smiled a bit and Ashton pressed his lips together as he glanced around the room.

“Dibs on Luke” Ashton shot out, surprising them all and then he was smirking at Michael, who’s smile was gone now “That’s how”

“You dick” Michael said gritting his teeth a bit and then rolling his eyes to the floor. Ashton chuckled and made his way across the white painted floors.

“Hey” Ashton said putting a hand on Michael’s shoulder, he hated when Michael was mad at him, even if he knew it would only be temporally “Tomorrow night we’ll switch” and Michael looked up at him to slightly nod before he was looking elsewhere “Cause God knows I can’t go that long without sleeping next to my pup” Ashton said sending a wink towards Calum and he smiled when Calum’s face turned red as he looked to the floor.

Ashton couldn’t help but take a few steps to kiss Calum on the cheek a few times then he was finally looking over at Luke who was smiling shyly at him. Ashton knew that once their two days of being here were over that he wouldn’t want to leave. He could already tell that being in this house would be their little safe haven and he knew he would be really dreading going back to the school after the two amazing days here.

*

Ashton had his back to Luke as they were in their room and he started taking things out of his bag that he knew he would be using soon like his phone charger and bathroom supplies.

There was a white dresser in front of him but Ashton knew they wouldn’t be staying here long enough to put all his clothes in there. There was a big bay window in this room as it over looked the beach and even in the winter like this the ocean still looked beautiful, even though Ashton could tell how freezing the water was.

This was the room he would always stay in when he would come up to visit his aunt so it was only natural that he picked this room. Michael had said that they wanted the room closer to the bathroom anyways with how much he took a piss in the middle of the night.

Ashton started to get a little hot with the heating in the house being so high so he slipped his sweatshirt off and began to rummage in his suitcase. He picked up the first T-shirt he seen which was a white one that had the name of a skate shop on it.

He was bunching it up and getting ready to put it on when he felt a warm body against his back and then one arm wrapped around his chest as the other wrapped around his waist. He closed his eyes and leaned back into Luke’s touch as he put one hand over Luke’s that was resting on his chest.

“Thank you for taking us here” Luke said quietly as he rested his forehead on the back of Ashton’s head. Ashton rubbed at his hand and smile. Luke was suddenly moving to kiss the back of Ashton’s neck and Ashton shivered. Luke started to pepper kisses on his bare shoulder and Ashton hummed at the feeling as he looked out at the birds on the beach and the waves crashing hard into the shore. He felt so relaxed in Luke’s arms like this as he could hear the sounds of the ocean and he swear he could stand like this for hours “You’re so warm” Luke said into his skin as he rubbed his nose against Ashton’s shoulder and held Ashton tighter and Ashton could feel him shiver.

“Are you cold?” Ashton felt the need to ask because sometimes he would shiver just from having the other boys’ touching him so he wasn’t sure what Luke’s reason was. Luke nodded and Ashton patted his hand once before turning around and then Luke’s hands traveled down Ashton’s torso.

“I was gonna take you guys into town but we can lay under the blankets for a little bit” Ashton said before kissing Luke’s nose and lips. Luke just smiled shyly and nodded.

Ashton was then making his way towards the bed and he set his shirt down on the edge of it before lying on his back and resting one arm behind his head. He looked to Luke who was still standing there and obviously looking his body up and down and then he was biting his lip before going to his bag and beginning to dig through it. Ashton curiously watched the blond boy as he seemed excited about whatever he was looking for in his bag.

After a few seconds Ashton was looking down at the bed and he only looked back up when he heard the click of a camera. He smiled when he seen that Luke was bringing down the Polaroid camera from his face and still continuing to bite his lip.

Ashton was never a big fan of getting his picture taken but for some reason he liked getting his picture taken by Luke, he liked thinking that he was worthy enough to have his picture taken by the boy.

The picture was then coming out of the slot of the camera and Luke shook it a few times before grinning wide at it and then putting it safely into his bag.

“What was that for?” Ashton chuckled as he wondered why Luke suddenly took a picture of him. He watched as Luke just shrugged and then he was turning back to Ashton.

“Cause you look beautiful” Luke said so casually like those words didn’t just make Ashton’s entire body heat up “And you always look beautiful so you better get used to it” Ashton knew he cheeks were still red but he forced himself to look back up at Luke as he smiled wide.

“Fuck, come here” Ashton whined as he patted his chest and Luke excitedly came over to the bed with the camera still in his hand and then he set it down on the bedside table before he started climbing up towards Ashton on his hands and knees.

Ashton was getting ready to lean forward and kiss Luke desperately but then Luke was stopping at his lower stomach as he started to press kisses all over it. Ashton did a content sigh and let his one free hand fall onto Luke’s back as he pushed his shirt upwards so he could touch his bare skin and the touch only made Luke kiss his stomach in a quicker pace as he began rubbing one hand up Ashton’s thigh.

Ashton just watched Luke’s every move as he steadily started moving his lips more up his stomach and towards his chest.

Ashton sucked in a breath when Luke got closer to his nipples then Luke was getting a smirk on his face before looking up at Ashton. Ashton just bit at his lip and moved his hand from Luke’s back to start rubbing up his arm. Luke looked back down to Ashton’s chest and instantly took one of his nipples into his mouth as he sucked slowly on it, making Ashton automatically let out a moan. Luke smirked against his skin before sucking on the nipple in a faster motion and when he grazed his teeth against it Ashton couldn’t help but pick his waist up a bit to grind against Luke. Luke’s hand that was on his thigh began to massage at it while he still started to use his tongue to flick against Ashton’s nipple and Ashton was already so hard. It had felt like so long since Luke touched him like this and he knew he wouldn’t last long at all.

Luke moved up a bit so that he was straddling Ashton’s hips and he started rubbing both his hands up and down Ashton’s strong chest, just enjoying the feel of the curly haired boys’ skin. Ashton was mesmerized as he just kept his eyes on Luke’s face as he looked like he was concentrating so hard on making Ashton feel good and he was succeeding more that he would ever know.

Luke suddenly leaned forward and began sucking on the side of Ashton’s neck and Ashton put both of his hands on Luke’s thighs as he just softly rubbing them up and down on the skin there.

“I’ve missed you so much” Luke said into Ashton’s neck and then he started paying attention to the skin right below Ashton’s ear as he gave it small kitten licks and it gave Ashton chills. Ashton started rubbing both his hands up Luke’s back and held him even closer to his chest as he nuzzled into the blond boys’ neck and just breathed him in.

“I missed you too” Ashton said before he was letting out a small moan when Luke bit at his skin “Fuck, you have no idea” Ashton put one his knees up a bit and then Luke was scooting back a little so that their dicks were pressed up against each other and Ashton let out a loud moan into Luke’s neck when the boy did a slow and hard grind against him.

It didn’t take long until Ashton was letting out moans and heavy breaths into Luke’s neck as the boy was now grinding quickly into him and letting out the most beautiful whimpers as he bit and licked at Ashton’s neck.

Ashton ran his hands down Luke’s bare back and stopped just above his jeans lining, just teasing the skin right there for a few seconds before pressing his hands down into Luke’s pants and under his boxers as he began to massage at Luke’s cheeks. Luke let out a loud and breathy moan as soon as Ashton’s hands began to move and Ashton smirked before not being able to help himself and sticking his index finger between his cheeks and rubbing at Luke’s wet hole. That movement caused Luke to grind back into Ashton’s finger hard, just begging for more as he started breathing more heavy.

“A-Ash” Luke moaned out and Ashton nudged at the side of Luke’s face, wanting the boy to look at him. Luke took his face out of Ashton’s neck and his face was beat red with how heavily he was breathing and Ashton couldn’t help but lean forward and kiss him hard as his other hand that was on Luke’s ass gripped it hard and that had Luke being even more responsive as he moaned into Ashton’s mouth.

“Yeah?” Ashton said out of breath as he leaned their foreheads together and Luke’s eyes were still closed “Feel good, Lukey?” he said in a rough voice and Luke just moaned louder as he started to desperately take turns grinding into Ashton’s dick and grinding back into his finger that was still teasing his hole.

Ashton finally realized that they had way too much clothing on and began to unzip Luke’s jeans and then Luke was sitting up and taking them all the way off, along with his boxers.

Ashton was about to take off his own pants and boxers but then Luke was doing it for him as he seemed so eager and desperate and Ashton loved seeing him like this.

Thankfully Luke was back in Ashton’s lap, after tossing his shirt off the bed too and the feeling of their bare dicks rubbing together felt even better than what they were doing before and both of the boy’s let out loud moans but Luke’s being more high pitched than Ashton’s.

Ashton didn’t hesitate to put both his hands on Luke’s ass as he started rubbing his finger against his hole again and didn’t wait long before he was pressing his finger inside and Luke’s movements stuttered a little before he was tossing his head back with his mouth falling open in a silent moan.  
Ashton couldn’t take his eyes off the beautiful boy and he still didn’t understand how he got so lucky as to have three boy’s that were so beautiful, inside and out.

Luke seemed to forget to keep grinding against Ashton’s dick with how good Ashton’s finger was feeling inside of him but then he was quickly beginning to grind against Ashton again.

“It’s okay” Ashton said softly as he put a hand on Luke’s hip and stilled his movements “Just want you to focus on the feeling of my finger, baby” and Luke smiled while his eyes were still closed and he just focused on pushing back on Ashton’s fingers. Ashton loved the feeling of Luke grinding against his dick but he just wanted to make this all about Luke and just make the boy feel good. Not to mention that he was sure the boy’s hips and thighs were getting sore from grinding so quickly against him.

Luke finally ended up just falling forward and resting his hands on the bed as Ashton added another finger and began scissoring them into him as the boy became a mess of whimpers and moans.

The view that Ashton had was amazing as he watched Luke’s head hang right in front of him as he clenched his eyes shut and gripped the sheets hard. There was a thin layer of sweat on his forehead that his hair was sticking too and he was biting so harshly on his lip that Ashton thought it would bleed.  
Ashton knew that Calum loved having his ass touched but he never even thought about the fact that Luke did too and he had to make sure that he did these types of things for Luke too now since he figured out that he loved it so much.

Ashton suddenly remembered how much Calum loved having his ass smacked and Ashton smirked a bit before moving his other hand to grip hard on Luke’s left cheek before taking his hand back a bit and smacking it hard. Luke let out the most beautiful moan at the same time that the smacking sound echoed through the room and Ashton almost came from that alone.

Ashton leaned forward and started sucking on Luke’s neck and then put his mouth right next to his ear.

“Do you think you could come just from me smacking your ass and fingering you?” Ashton whispered, even though he had no reason to but Luke seemed to be approving of it as he whimpered and began quickly nodding.

“Yeah…Ash, P-please”

“Anything for my boy” Ashton smirked and he knew Luke was close from the way his breathing became even more erratic as he dropped his head to Ashton’s shoulder.

Ashton smacked his cheek even harder than before and pushed his fingers even further in.

“Fuck!” Luke cried out and Ashton knew he had hit his spot so he began pushing both of his fingers quickly into the boy’s prostate as he felt Luke shaking above him “Fuck, Ashton” Luke whimpered out and his hot breath was hitting Ashton’s shoulder as he still had his forehead pressing against it.  
Only a few seconds went by before Luke was releasing all over Ashton’s stomach and Ashton smacked his ass once more as the boy came down from his high.

“Oh my god” Luke said out of breath before he dropped his body onto Ashton’s chest, not even caring about the come that was all over him now too.  
Ashton just looked down at Luke as he softly rubbed his hand up and down the boys’ back as his other hand rested in his hair and he swears he could stay like this forever, with Luke in his arms like this.

Luke picked his head up and rested his chin on Ashton’s chest after his breathing had calmed down a bit and both boy’s already had soft smiles on their faces. Ashton was about to say something but then Luke was sitting all the way up and Ashton took a deep breath in when Luke back and started to pump a hand on Ashton’s still painfully hard dick.

Luke was straddling Ashton’s thighs as he quickened his hand up and began rubbing his thumb on the tip, causing Ashton to thrust upwards into his hand.

It didn’t take long until Ashton was coming hard and throwing his head back into the pillow as Luke let go of his dick and just started putting soft kisses all over his thighs.

Ashton opened his eyes again and looked down at Luke who was still in between his legs and he let out a chuckle then patted his chest, wanting Luke to be close to him again.

Luke crawled up his body and fell down on his chest again and Ashton didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around his torso. Luke looked up at him as his mouth was smooshed against Ashton’s chest a bit and his hair was still a mess. Ashton looked at the beutfiul boy for a few more seconds before he was grabbing the camera off the end table and pointing it down at Luke as the boy still looked up at him, looking as desperate as ever.

Ashton snapped the picture and when it came out of the slot he shook it like he seen Luke do then he was smirking at it.

“I’m keeping this one” he said in a rough voice from moaning so much and he just felt Luke smile against him. Ashton took his wallet out of jeans that were abandoned on the bed and he slipped the picture in it before looking back at Luke. He put a hand through the boy’s hair and let out a breath “God, you’re so fucking beautiful” he whispered almost just to himself and he seen Luke blush as he rubbed his face against the chest underneath him.

“Mmm” Luke hummed to himself and closed his eyes before pressing lazy kisses to Ashton’s skin.

“You know…” Ashton’s low voice vibrated through Luke and Luke smiled as he still continued to kiss Ashton’s chest “I find it pretty odd that Calum and Michael haven’t walked in on us yet” and he felt Luke chuckle against him but he just snuggled more into his chest and Ashton could tell that he had no plan in getting up “We should go see what they’re up to. Knowing Michael it probably isn’t anything good” Ashton said lazily as he laughed a bit.

“Don’t leave me” Luke said like he was actually really scared that Ashton was going to leave and never come back and it confused Ashton because he wondered why Luke would be afraid of something like that but he just held the boy tighter and rubbing a hand through his hair.

“I’ll never leave you, baby” Ashton whispered but he said it sternly because it meant it those words with all his heart. Theses boy’s were his entire life and he knew he would never hurt them.


	73. Luke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would have updated yesterday but my brother was being a dick and refused to take me to the Library but anyways enjoy!

Luke was now giggling loudly into Ashton’s shoulder as the curly haired boy had thrown him over his shoulder after he said that he was actually scared of where Michael and Calum were since they had been so quiet the whole time Luke and Ashton were in their room.

Ashton was walking down the stairs as Luke thrashed his legs around a bit but just ended up giving up, realizing that he actually liked Ashton carrying him.

“Did you surrender?” Ashton spoke and Luke could tell he was smiling.

“Yeah..yeah I surrender” Luke giggled again “I’m all yours”

“Just how I like it” Ashton said in a serious voice but then both of the boy’s were laughing again as Ashton was coming to the end of the stairs.  
Luke was actually sad when Ashton put him down but he couldn’t feel like that for long when Ashton smiled wide at him and gave him a few quick kisses to his lips.

He then watched as Ashton moved his eyes all over the lower floor of the house and he knew Calum and Michael weren’t anywhere in sight when Ashton let out a breath and rubbed a hand through his hair.

“Let’s check outside” Ashton said in a small voice and Luke knew how worried Ashton got about Calum. By now he was sure that Ashton trusted Michael enough to keep the boy safe but he figure that there was still something in the back of his head that was thinking about the time at the aquarium when Michael tricked Ashton into thinking that he lost Calum. Luke still remembers the horror on Ashton’s face when he thought that Michael had actually lost Calum.

Ashton was then softly taking Luke’s hand and intertwining them before he was guiding them to the front door and out on the front porch.  
The sun was still shining high in the sky and Luke closed his eyes as the warmness hit his face. It would almost feel like summer if not for the occasional cold breeze in the air.

They walked around the side of the house and Luke watched as Ashton was still roaming his eyes all over and he squeezed the curly haired boy’s hand in an attempt to calm him a bit. Ashton squeezed it back and flashed Luke a quick smile but then he was looking back to the yard.

When they got to the back yard Luke couldn’t take his eyes off of the light colored sand and blue water that was hitting the shore and making the sand a darker color. It was nothing like the beaches back in Florida but somehow Luke liked this beach way better. Ashton leaned into him a little and Luke smiled when he realized that he liked this beach better because he had his boy’s with him and it was simple as that; Luke was in love with any place that Ashton, Michael and Calum were with him at and he knew it would always be like that.

Luke turned back only to see how the house looked from the back and his eyes instantly landed on the window of their bedroom that Ashton had been standing at when they first arrived. His eyes followed the wrap around deck and he could see lights hanging from the railings; he bet that this house looked even more beautiful at night.

Luke pulled Ashton’s hoody that he was wearing over his neck a bit when a cold breeze felt sharp against his skin and he leaned into Ashton again. He took a double look at the boy when he seen the wide smile on his face and he looked where Ashton was looking.

Luke’s face broke into a smile too at the sight and he leaned his head against Ashton’s shoulder, which made the boy kiss Luke’s temple and keep his lips there as they watched the two other boys on the beach.

From here they could see Michael and Calum both sitting up with their knees to their chests as they were pressed shoulder to shoulder. They watched as Michael had one arm wrapped around Calum’s waist as he kept peppering small kisses all over the side of his face. Even though Luke couldn’t see Calum’s face he was sure that the boy had a huge smile and a blush on his face as Michael smiled.  
Michael was then pressing another kiss to Calum’s hair and resting his head on Calum’s shoulder as he started to rub his hand up and down Calum’s back as they both watched the waves and Calum rested his head on top of Michael’s.

“They’re beautiful, aren’t they?” Ashton almost whispered and Luke looked over to him to see a small smile on his face as he never looked away from the beach.

“So beautiful” Luke nodded and he leaned over to kiss Ashton’s cheek which made Ashton let go of his hand and put an arm around his shoulders instead as he pulled him close.

Before Ashton had said that he had actually been thinking about the same thing. It seemed like you only seen these types of things in movies but here Luke was, able to see his two boy’s sitting next to each other in the sand as they shared small kisses; Luke was so in love.

Soon Ashton was walking again and pulling Luke gently along with him as they went around the bushes at the edge of the yard and stepped onto the sand. Luke desperately wished that it was warm enough to take his shoes off because he loved feeling the sand in between his toes. He then remembered that Ashton said they would be coming back here when summer started and he couldn’t wait.

They walked up behind Michael and Calum without a sound and neither of the boy’s noticed them until Ashton was walking around the side of Michael and plopping down next to him and Michael and Calum both turned their heads toward him. Luke walked in front of Ashton and Ashton put his knees up so Luke squeezed in between them and rested his back against Ashton’s chest as the felt the boys’ strong arms wrap around his chest and then he felt Ashton’s warm breath against his neck as the boy leaned his forehead against the back of his head. Luke closed his eyes at the closeness and only turned around when he felt eyes on him.

Calum and Michael were both looking at him with fond eyes and Calum kept flicking his eyes from Ashton and Luke like he couldn’t decide who to look at. Michael’s eyes were glued right to Luke though and Luke shot him a big smile that the pink haired boy returned as his head was still rested on Calum’s shoulder.

It was quiet for while as they all just listened and watched the waves and Ashton’s breathing against him was actually making Luke feel tired with how soothing it was.

The sound of Michael’s loud yawn knocked them all out of their little trance and they all let out a giggle.

“Alright. Nap time” Michael said quietly and they watched him as he started to lay down and Calum didn’t hesitate to lay his head down on Michael’s chest as Michael was looking up at the sky. Michael wrapped an arm around his waist again and kept kissing the side of his head as they both closed their eyes.

Luke was cranking his head back just to watch them but he didn’t have to for long.  
Ashton was then pressing a kiss to the back of Luke’s neck and rubbing at his arm a bit.

“Wanna lay down?” he whispered like it was some sort of secret but it made Luke smile as he nodded. Ashton began to scoot back a little and laid down on his back right next to Michael. Luke turned around so that he was on his knees and then he was lying entirely on Ashton as he rested his head just below the boys’ chin.

He looked at Calum and Michael as they both had their eyes still closed and Luke was actually convinced that they might actually already be asleep but then Michael was moving. Michael peaked his eyes open a little as he turned to look at Ashton and then he was raising his arm and settling the back of his hand on Ashton’s chest as he started to do an up and down motion. Luke heard Ashton let out a content sigh and he watched as Ashton just enjoyed the feeling for a few more seconds before he was grabbing Michael’s hand and pressing a few kisses to the backs of fingers before he was locking their hands together and settling them back down on his chest.

Luke once again felt that his whole body filling up with that feeling of being so love as he stared at his three boys and he doesn’t know why he didn’t notice it before but something seemed different between the three of them now that he was back. Their love for each other just felt so much deeper and Luke couldn’t tear his eyes away from them.

Luke only looked down to look at Ashton and Michael’s hands that were still together and he just watched as Ashton softly rubbed his thumb against Michael’s skin like he couldn’t stop touching him for even a second. Luke knew that feeling very well though and right now he felt like his heart was actually going to explode with how full of love it was for these three boys next to him.

When Luke flicked his eyes back up Michael was looking straight at him and he could tell that the pink haired boy had been looking at him for a while.  
Luke for some reason felt himself getting shy and he bit at his lip as he smiled which caused Michael to let out a quiet chuckle and he moved his hand, that Ashton was still holding on to, to brush it across Luke’s cheek. With how they were holding hands it was actually the back of Ashton’s hand that touched Luke’s face but somehow it still felt like Michael was touching him and he closed his eyes as he hummed. Ashton’s other hand that was still resting at the small of Luke’s back moved all the way up the blond boys’ back until it was going over his neck and then rubbing in his hair and Luke felt himself getting more tired by the second.

Luke opened his eyes only when he felt the cold wind hit his face and he snuggled further into Ashton’s chest and looked over to see that Michael had his eyes closed again as the side of his face was resting on top of Calum’s head.

Luke couldn’t help but lean up a bit and lean over to press a kiss to Michael’s lips and at first the boy was unresponsive like he had actually been sleeping but then Luke felt him smile into the kiss and start slowly kissing him back as he let out a whimper.

When Luke came back for air he let out a breath and kissed Michael all over his face, making the boy giggle then he looked over to Calum who had his eyes still closed and he pressed a soft kiss to his mouth and cheek before going back to Ashton. Luke turned to look straight up at Ashton as he rested his chin on his chest and Ashton brought his hand up to card it through Luke’s hair and then he was drifting it down to his cheek and cupping it.

Luke was starting to think that this was all a dream with how perfect it was but it occurred to him that it wasn’t; this was actually his life and he had never felt happier than he was right now.

The last thing he remembered mumbling before he dozed off was “I’ll love you guys forever”.


	74. Michael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Very long and intense Michael chapter (It’s like 9k oops) with lots of Mashton and lots of feelings. I hope this makes up for my lack of updates...sorry guys it’s just that its summer now and I’m usually at the beach all day so it’s hard for me to get on the internet especially when I don’t have it at my house anymore. Let me know what you think!

From his spot on top of the counter Michael could see Luke and Calum on the couch watching some cartoon movie and Calum had his head on Luke’s lap as Luke ran his fingers through his hair. Michael kicked his feet back and forth as he sat on kitchen counter and hummed to himself just feeling so happy.

He always felt happy when he was with his boys but there was something about today; something that was making him overwhelmed with love and happiness and Michael never wanted the feeling to go away.

The smell of spaghetti and garlic bread was filling the room and Michael could actually feel his stomach growl at how badly he wanted to be eating right now. He hadn’t really eaten a full meal since breakfast this morning when Ashton made pancakes and he smiled at the memory of Ashton asking him for a kiss across the counter.

He looked in front of him to see Ashton once again at the stove. He was stirring the pasta and wearing a red flannel that had the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Ashton hardly ever wore flannel and Michael really wished that he would more because he looking phenomenal in them.

As if he sensed Michael’s eyes on him Ashton briefly turned his head over his shoulder just so he could look at Michael in the corner of his eye and Michael did a shy smile before he was looking down at his lap and playing with the bracelets around his wrist.

“You’re awfully quiet” Ashton stated once he was facing the stove again and opening the oven just to check on the garlic bread before shutting the door again.

“Yeah” Michael took a deep breath in through his nose before looking up and staring at Ashton’s back again “Just taking it all in”  
Ashton was then turning around and taking a few steps to the left to lean against the counter before he was crossing his arms over his chest; not in an angry way but it was just something he did when he was giving someone his full attention.

“Taking what all in?” he asked curiously. Michael just shrugged at first, not knowing how to say it and he glanced around the kitchen a little bit.

“This is what it would feel like if we actually lived together” Michael said simply and Ashton looked at him with a face that Michael couldn’t decipher for a few seconds before he was smiling without his teeth.

“Well we basically live with each other when we’re at your house too”

“Yeah” Michael half agreed “But this is like a new house…and we have it entirely to ourselves. It just feels more real…I don’t know” Michael shrugged again.

“I hate when you do that” Ashton said sharply and it had Michael taking a double look at him and raising his eyebrows at the boy “You end sentences with ‘I don’t know’ when you feel like what you’re saying is stupid…and what you say is never stupid” He was staring Michael down like Michael had no choice but to believe what Ashton was saying to him but Michael liked when he did that; it was like Ashton was promising him that he meant every word he said.

Michael didn’t really know what to say back so he just cracked a smile and made himself look up from his lap.

“We should…ummm” Michael felt himself stuttering on his words under Ashton’s stare again and he had no idea why he was feeling like his heart was going to beat out his chest “We should go drink tonight. You know, with it being New Years Eve and all”

“I kind of forgot it was New Years Eve” Ashton said with a chuckle as he put both hands on his head like he did always did during football games when he was out of breath. Michael felt himself getting turned on just thinking about Ashton on the football field again but he quickly shook it off because now was not the time.

“But we gotta make Luke and Calum come with us this time” Michael added because he didn’t want to leave the other boys home alone again like they did the last time they went partying. Ashton nodded in agreement as he looked out into the living room and then he was smiling and focusing on Michael and Michael knew that he would always get the good kind of shivers when Ashton smiled at him.

“But don’t try to make Calum and Luke drink if they don’t want to” and Michael made an offended look at him which had Ashton laughing.

“Why would you ever think such a thing?” he said putting a hand on his heart.

“Cause I know you” Ashton chuckled “Besides we’ll need at least one sober person with us to drive home”

“So….” Michael smirked and bit at his lip “You’ll get shitfaced with me?”

“Well I don’t know about that” Ashton tried not to smile as he turned around to stir the pasta again “But I’ll drink a little yeah”

“Come on” Michael begged, dragging out his words. He stood up and walked behind Ashton to wrap his arms around his torso and he felt Ashton immediately lean back into the touch “Just let go. The worlds not gonna stop turning just cause you have fun for once”

“I have fun” Ashton scoffed and Michael laughed a bit before kissing his neck a few times.

“Yeah but you never completely let go. A part of you always seems to be somewhere else” and when Ashton let out a breath, Michel knew that the boy knew he was right. Ashton always felt it was his responsibility to stay the alert one and take care of them all and Michael just wanted him to have fun tonight and not worry about anything.

“Fine” Ashton said shutting off the burner and Michael squeezed him tighter and rubbed his face against the back of Ashton’s hair as he smiled. Ashton was then turning so he could briefly look at him “But if I’m hungover tomorrow you’re taking care of me”

“Deal” Michael giggled and he got a warm feeling thinking about taking care of Ashton. Ashton was always taking care of him and Michael never got to the same for Ashton because he was always putting this guard up like he wasn’t allowed to ever be sad or taken care of. Michael loved the idea of being able to tuck Ashton in and just totally take care of him.

Michael was forcing himself to back away from Ashton when he could tell the food was ready and Michael put one more kiss to the back of Ashton’s hair before he was taking it upon himself to go get the other boy’s.

*

It felt so domestic as they all sat at the table that was next to the big bay window as they ate their spaghetti and garlic toast. Michael was sat next to Ashton as they other boy’s sat across from them and he smiled at the way Calum kept looking out the window like he just couldn’t wait to get outside again and be on the beach.

He remembered being up in their room when they first got here and Calum was instantly going over to the window after he packed and Michael knew he had to take the boy down to the beach with how excited he looked.

Ashton told Luke and Calum about their idea to go out drinking tonight and weirdly enough they actually seemed alright about it. Michael still kept checking their faces for some doubt but there wasn’t any and he knew this night was going to be great. They hadn’t ever went out drinking with all four of them so Michael knew it would interesting. Especially since Luke and Calum had never seen him or Ashton drunk and he started to wonder how they would react to it.

*

Michael was upstairs in his bedroom as he was just putting a white t-shirt over his head then he was turning to grab the jean jacket that was hung up in the closet. He slipped it on, remembering the look on his boys faces when he opened the present and he knew this jacket would always remind him of the first Christmas with the loves of his life.

He fixed the collar a bit and ran a hand through his hair before he was turning back and looking at Calum who was across the hallway in the bathroom. The door was open only a sliver but he could see Calum in front of the mirror as he was focusing on something as he leaned in close.

Michael walked out of his room and knocked just once before opening the door and Calum was smiling at him in the mirror before going back to what Michael could now see as putting mascara on. Michael smiled and walked over to the counter before sitting up on it, right next to Calum and he just watched the boy silently for a few seconds before speaking what he came in here to say.

“You sure you’re okay with going out tonight?” Michael asked softly and Calum finished his eye before putting the top back on the mascara and setting it on the counter and focusing on Michael.

“Yeah” he shrugged “I mean I’ll be with you guys so I’ll be fine” and Michael nodded at that; He was glad that Calum knew that they would always protect him no matter what.

“That’s right. Luke probably won’t drink either so at least you’ll have one sober person with you” Michael chuckled and Calum moved over so that he was in between Michael’s legs and Michael’s smile only got wider when Calum leaned into to kiss his lips. Calum seemed sad when he backed up and Michael reached up to cup both of his cheeks.

“I wish we could stay here forever, Michael. I really love it here” and Michael let out a breath at that and nodded. He had been thinking about that ever since they got here.

“Me too, baby” He whispered and then Calum was falling forwards and nuzzling his face in Michael’s neck and Michael wrapped both arms around his torso as he held him tight “Ashton said we’d come back though remember?” he said kissing Calum’s hair and rubbing his back.

“Yeah. I can’t wait” and Michael felt the boy smiling against his neck which made him feel better. He hated seeing any of his boys sad for even a second.

“You guys about ready?” they heard Ashton’s booming voice coming from down the hall and soon his footsteps were getting closer. Calum moved his head out of Michael’s neck and they both looked to the doorway as Ashton was leaning against it but his happy face quickly fell when he seen Calum wrapped up in Michael’s arms. Calum just nodded at Ashton’s words from before then started making his way towards the door and Asthon didn’t tear his eyes away from the boy. Once Calum was right in front of Ashton he put a hand in the front of Calum’s hair and the boy looked up at him.

“Hey, you okay?” Ashton spoke quietly but Michael heard him from his spot by the counter.

“Mhm” Calum smiled and put one arm around Ashton and the curly haired boy didn’t hesitate to wrap his arm around Calum’s shoulders and kiss the side of his head. Michael watched fondly as Calum was leaning up to kiss Ashton’s cheek then walking past him and down the hall.

Ashton still kept his eyes on Calum and then he was turning to Michael with raised eyebrows.

“He’s fine” Michael said sternly, not wanting Ashton to worry anymore, before pushing himself away from the counter and walking towards Ashton. Ashton was still wearing his red and black flannel with a plain black shirt underneath but now he was also wearing a black snapback on backwards as his curls stuck out from underneath it and Michael was practically drooling.

Ashton got a small smirk on his face once he could tell that Michael was checking him out and Michael gave him a kiss on the lips as he wrapped on arm around his waist then he moved his lips to kiss up Ashton’s neck.

“Mhm” Michael hummed as he just breathed in the scent of Ashton and felt his warm skin under his lips “You look really sexy, Ash” and he actually felt Ashton physically shiver at his words then he felt Ashton’s lips on his jaw as he kept pressing kisses there.

“So do you” he whispered and Michael knew if they stood here kissing any longer then they wouldn’t ever leave the bathroom. Ashton seemed to be thinking the same thing as he chuckled and backed away from Michael a bit. Ashton’s face was redder than before once Michael looked at him before and he watched as Ashton bit at his lip “I guess we better get going” and Michael nodded.

“Let’s go get you trashed” he said grabbing Ashton’s hand and Ashton just chuckled in response as he let Michael lead him down the stairs.

*

They ended up having to drive almost an hour to get to the closest club. There were a few bars in the little town they were staying in but it wasn’t anything like they were used to at home so they passed them all up.

Luke and Calum of course said that they didn’t mind going to the small bars but Michael felt like he would rather die than drink in those dive bars. Ashton just laughed and shook his head but Michael knew he was silently agreeing with him.

Michael just figured that if he was going to get Ashton drunk then he was going to do it right and he decided that they made the right choice to drive further when they were walking into the purple and black themed club that was crowded with people. Usually Michael hated big crowds but when it came to clubs (and concerts) he actually didn’t mind and liked all the extra company. It just made him feel like less of an idiot when he was drunk because everyone else around him was drunk too. It was like they were all sharing this common thing and Michael always felt so relaxed.

Before he started this thing with the boy’s he always went to the club by himself and he remembers sitting at the bar all alone as he downed one drink after another until the bartender was actually cutting him off and calling him a cab. Luckily there was a certain bartender at the club he always went to that had become acquainted with Michael and he was always polite to him and knew when Michael had had enough.

Usually Luke was the reason that Michael drank but he didn’t ever want to think about that again. He had Luke now, along with two other perfect boys’, and that was all that mattered.

When they had first arrived at the club Ashton and Michael had seated Luke and Calum in one of the booths towards the back and ordered them some food and non alcoholic drinks before Michael was dragging Ashton over to the bar. He could feel Luke’s eyes on him as they walked away so he made sure to turn around and give him one more smile before they got lost in the crowd.

Michael was currently leaning his elbow on the bar as his lazy eyes looked up at all the drinks behind the counter and it seemed like every few seconds he was zoning out and temporarily forgetting where he was. That was the first sign that Michael was drunk. The second sign was that he could feel tingles all over his body and he couldn’t stop smiling at the most random times. He even laughed out loud a few times for no reason and he didn’t even feel like an idiot for doing it.

If Michael had to guess he would say that he had about five drinks, of what…he didn’t know, but he was sure that his number was currently five. He remembers after the third one they went back to the table to see how Calum and Luke were doing but then surprisingly Ashton was the one dragging Michael back to the bar once again.

Michael glanced over to Ashton next to him who was sipping on some dark colored drink and he was sure that it was way stronger than the drinks he had. He still kept his eyes on Ashton as the boy had his lips parted and he was just rubbing the top of the glass across his bottom lip. It was really turning Michael on and he had no idea why. Well he was convinced that everything Ashton did turned him on and that he only got more horny whenever he was drunk so really he wasn’t surprised.

Even in his drunk state of mind Michael could see that Ashton was way more intoxicated than he was and he knew that Ashton wasn’t acting this out of it when they went to that party after the football game. At the party Ashton was talkative and basically himself but now Michael couldn’t even remember the last time Ashton had said something to him.

Michael was a talkative drunk but he could see right now that Ashton wasn’t at all.  
Michael kept flicking his eyes all over the side of Ashton’s tan face as the lights would flicker on him every few seconds and Ashton’s eyes seemed to be locked on something in front of him.

“Ash” Michael mumbled and when Ashton didn’t look at him he realized that he should talk way louder “Ashy” Michael whined louder as he moved his head so that it was sideways and closer to Ashton. Ashton was suddenly jumping like he just realized that Michael was talking to him and as soon as Ashton looked at him Michael felt bad about making Ashton get drunk. It wasn’t as if he poured the drinks down Ashton’s throat but he did keep begging Ashton to get drunk with him.

Ashton just looked so sad and miserable as his eyes were actually red and Michael’s heart dropped a bit at the sight.  
Ashton continued to look at him as he slowly blinked, like it was a painful act to do and Michael reached a hand out and put it on Ashton’s arm. Ashton looked down at his hand like he was wondering why it was there and it really worried Michael but he still didn’t move it away.

“Can you…can you like talk to me?” Michael asked shyly as he scooted his bar stool even closer to Ashton and he watched as the boy swallowed hard then he was grabbing his drink, with the arm that Michael wasn’t touching, and downing the rest of it and Michael felt himself getting more worried by the second.

It seemed like hours went by and Ashton still didn’t answer Michael so he decided that he would need to pry a bit to get Ashton to talk back to him.

“You’re okay…right?” and that had Ashton looking back at Michael quicker than before. Michael watched as the boy licked his lips and then started to bite at it as he looked away from Michael but his head was still turned towards him.

“I don’t h-hate you…you know that right? I don’t hate you at all” Ashton slurred out and Michael had never heard him sound so worn out. It was the words that shocked him though and Michael felt his eyes squinting as confusion washed over him. Of course Michael knew that Ashton didn’t hate him and he had no idea why Ashton felt the need to make sure he knew that.

“Ashton” Michael tried to find his words as he kept breathing heavily as Ashton still started him down “I know you don’t hate me. Why would you even say that? You’re really….you’re really confusing me right now” and Michael watched as Ashton kept looking his face up and down and then he was scanning around the room and Michael needed the boys’ focus on him again. Michael reached out and put a hand on cheek and gripped his jaw a bit as he forced Ashton to look at him again.

Ashton was instantly closing his eyes and Michael rubbed a thumb across his skin, causing Ashton to open his eyes again.

“Ashton what’re you talking about?” Michael said way more softly this time.

“Nothing…nothing” Ashton was shaking his head and then he was closing his eyes and pushing his face into Michael’s hand like he was trying to hide “Nothing” he said again and Michael couldn’t believe how fast he was sobering up. Michael bit at his lip and looked around, knowing that he needed to get Ashton alone then he was standing up and was surprised when he didn’t feel dizzy. He really was sobering up fast and Michael knew it was because of how worried he was about Ashton right now. He had no idea what was going through the boys’ mind right now and it was making him nervous to know that Ashton was going through something entirely on his own.

Michael stood on his tippy toes a bit to look at Calum and Luke’s table and from here he could see that Luke was throwing French fries into Calum’s mouth as they both laughed like it was the funniest thing in the world. He knew they were fine as of now so he focused back of Ashton and grabbed his arm.

“Come on” Michael rubbed a soothing hand on Ashton’s arm then got closer to him.

“Don’t wanna” Ashton mumbled but Michael heard him loud and clear. Michael was about to say something but then Ashton was actually ripping his arm away from Michael’s grasp and Michael stood there motionless as he felt like he couldn’t even breathe. Ashton had never been so harsh to anyone, let alone Michael and Michael actually felt his eyes getting wet. He shook his head and gritted his teeth, knowing that he couldn’t start crying right now.

When Michael snapped back into it he could see the bartender leaving the space right in front of Ashton and then he watched as Ashton was grabbing a new filled glass of the dark liquid and Michael was ripping it away from him before Ashton could move it up to his mouth.

“Michael…Michael I wanted that” Ashton said looking at him in a confused way but Michael was glad that he didn’t look straight up angry

“You don’t need any more drinks, Ash” Michael said taking Ashton’s hat off and running a hand through his hair. Ashton closed his eyes and leaned into the touch like a cat and Michael giggled a bit but remember that there was something eating away at Ashton right now “Let’s get some air, yeah?” and Michael let out a breath this time when Ashton nodded and started to stand up. Ashton stumbled a bit though when he got on two feet and Michael quickly stepped forward and steadied the boy “You alright?”

“Great” Ashton did a lazy smile and then he was leaning entirely against Michael’s as he burrowed his head in the pink haired boys’ neck. He felt both of Ashton’s arms wrap around his waist and Michael pressed a kiss to his head before he started to back away from the bar a bit. Michael had to admit that he was loving this overly cuddly side of Ashton but he realized it was really the only upside to Ashton begin so drunk. He didn’t like how sad and miserable Ashton looked when he had so much to drink.

He was able to pry Ashton off him enough to actually start walking through the crowd.

Michael stopped when he realized that there was no point in even coming back to the bar since neither of them would be drinking anymore. He took another glance at Luke and Calum’s table as the two boys were now on the same side of the booth as they giggled into each other’s necks and Michael smiled. He didn’t want to take them away from their fun but he knew that they would be just as worried about Ashton if they were to see him like this.  
That was the thing though, Michael really didn’t want Luke and Calum to see Ashton in this kind of state but really there was no other option.

He took a deep breath and began dragging Ashton along through the crowd as his arm was around Ashton’s shoulders and Ashton still had his face burrowed in his neck with an arm around his waist.

He knew he would have to talk to Ashton later about what he had said earlier, even though it was driving Michael crazy to know what the hell he was talking about.

The bass was actually starting to hurt his ears and the body heat from everyone else around him was making his sweat so he hurried his pace a bit, already wanting to leave this club and kind of regretting the whole thing.  
When they finally got to the table Calum and Luke were both looking up and smiling wide but both of their smiles fell as soon as they seen Ashton.

“We’re leaving” Michael said loudly as he motioned his hand towards the front doors and Calum and Luke both didn’t hesitate to climb out of the booth.

“Lukey my boy!” Ashton said grabbing Luke’s shirt and bringing him towards him. Luke looked shocked but smiled none the less.

“Hi Ash” Luke said almost shyly but then when Luke looked at Michael he was widening his eyes a bit and Michael just bit at his lip and shrugged, acting like Ashton’s strange behavior was no big deal.

“And Calum” Ashton smiled and ruffled Calum’s hair “You always look so cute” Calum’s face reddened as he smiled and looked down to the floor but then he was doing almost the same thing as Luke was doing and giving Michael a look like he was saying “What is going on with him?”

“Alright, come on” Michael said losing his patience then he was leading the three boy’s out of the loud club.

*

When they got outside Michael felt the worry slip away from him a bit but Ashton was still hanging on his side so he was reminded of the fact that he was totally in charge of taking care of these three boys. It wasn’t like he was worried that anything would happen to them but it was just strange not being able to count on Ashton to watch over them.

He watched as Calum and Luke walked in front of them but he would let out a breath whenever Luke looked back at him with a worried face as the lights from the parking lot shined down on them.

Luckily he was able to find their car, even though Ashton was the one who parked it, and then he was walking quickly towards it.

As soon as they came up to it Ashton was putting both arms on top of the car and leaning down a bit so that he could rest his head down on his arms and Michael actually thought he was going to be sick.

He was about to go comfort the boy but then Calum was coming up next to Ashton and rubbing a hand up and down his back as he whispered something that Michael couldn’t make out.

Michael watched as Luke looked at the two boys but then his focus was on Michael and Michael swallowed hard when Luke walked towards him.

“Jesus Christ, Michael how much did he have to drink?” Luke said a bit angrily and Michael should have seen this coming.

“I don’t know” he shrugged, feeling so small “I didn’t exactly keep count” and Luke just let out a sigh at that and rubbed a hand through his hair “Let’s just get home, okay? He’ll be fine, Luke” Michael said rubbing Luke’s arm then pressing a kiss to his temple. He wanted to focus more on Luke because the boy really seemed worried but Michael knew that he just had to get Ashton home right now and that was the main priority.

Ashton was still leaning his head on the top of the car when Michael approached them and Calum still looked worried as ever as he stayed close to the drunk boy. Michael started digging through Ashton’s back pockets and when he came up with nothing he started fishing through the front pocket and finally he felt the coldness of keys on his hand. He brought them out and seen that Ashton hadn’t moved at all and he could really tell how miserable the boy felt right now. Michael felt so bad and couldn’t help but think that this was partially his fault.

“Can you drive?” Michael asked Luke as he faced him again. Luke nodded tiredly and Michael tossed him the keys before slipping past Calum, and pressing a kiss to the back of his hair, then opening the back door “Ash come on, bud” Michael said rubbing the back of his hair but Ashton still didn’t move “Let’s get you home…I promise you’ll feel better” Ashton let out an in pain moan and finally he was pushing himself off the car and Michael quickly reached out to help him stand up. Michael looked away from Ashton for a few seconds just to see Calum looking down at the ground, like it pained him to look at Ashton any longer, before he was getting in the passenger seat as Luke was getting in the driver’s seat.

He was then helping Ashton get in the back seat and almost let out a sad whimper when he seen Ashton crawl all the way in and then let his head fall to the window with a loud thump as he instantly shut his eyes.

Michael got in as well and looked at Ashton as the boy let out breaths out of his mouth and seemed like he was already sleeping.  
Michael couldn’t help but reach out and pet a hand through his hair as he felt so shitty about himself.

“I’m so sorry, Ash” Michael whispered but the car was practically silent as they pulled out of the parking lot so he knew Calum and Luke had heard him. Ashton on the other hand, he wasn’t sure if the boy had heard him or not but Michael would make sure to say it to him again once they got home, and even in the morning again, so Ashton knew how shitty he really felt.

*

The ride home seemed to take forever and even though Michael was so exhausted he just couldn’t let himself fall asleep until they were home.  
Luckily, Ashton had slept the whole way home so he at least got some rest before he had to walk up to the house but Michael knew he would be helping the boy up to his room either way.

When they got inside Ashton was still tucked under Michael’s arm but this time he wasn’t as clingy as he was before and Michael really missed it. He looked down fondly at the curly haired boy as his one hand was in a ball as it rubbed at his eye and Michael only looked up when he heard Calum or Luke yawn.

“Umm…” Luke began as he looked down “Cal can just sleep with me tonight” and Michael nodded, thinking that was the best idea plus he didn’t want to be away from Ashton when he was in this sort of condition.

Calum and Luke were both walking over to Michael and Ashton and Michael smiled wide when Calum clung to Ashton and Luke brought Michael into a side hug as they all shared a group hug. Michael looked over and smiled even wider when he seen that Ashton was even doing a tired smile as he nuzzled his face into Calum’s neck then gave his cheek a kiss.

They all said their goodnights and Michael didn’t miss the way Ashton clung onto Calum when the boy started to pull away but Calum just pet a hand through his hair and kissed his cheek a few times before he was whispering something that had Ashton smiling and then they were separating.

*

Michael was surprised when Ashton didn’t need to be dragged up the stairs and he was actually walking a few steps ahead of him but he was taking them slowly and Michael trailed closely behind him, making sure he didn’t fall.  
When they got to the top step Michael could see Calum and Luke’s bedroom door cracked slightly open and he could see what looked like Calum sprawled across Luke’s chest and he smiled.

“Shit” Ashton grumbled and Michael looked back to see the boy rubbing at his forehead and backing away from the doorway. In any other situation Michael would laugh if Ashton ran into the wall but right now he just felt bad, all of this was his fault.

“Alright” Michael let out a breath and put a hand on Ashton’s back as he lead him into the dark room “You really need to get some sleep”

“I did get some sleep” Ashton said quietly “You know…in the car” and Michael chuckled at that. Sober Ashton wouldn’t have ever made a smart ass comment like that.

“Well you need more sleep” Michael said back as they were approaching the bed.  
Ashton practically fell onto the bed on his stomach and just laid there motionless like he was already asleep.  
Michael stood at the foot of the bed and looked at Ashton for a few seconds as the deck light from outside shined on him and made his hair almost look blond.

He then tapped the back of Ashton’s thigh and kept his hand there.

“Turn over for me, babe” he whispered, not wanting to startle Ashton just in case he really was asleep and Michael smiled to himself when he realized he had never really called Ashton any pet names but he loved the way it rolled off his tongue.

Ashton just made a grunt in response and Michael expected him to put up a fight a little bit. Michael knew he was exhausted but he didn’t want Ashton sleeping in his clothes all night.

“Come on, Ash. Let me take care of you” he practically begged and only a few seconds went by before Ashton was slowly turning over as his eyes were just barely open like it was painful for him; Michael figured it was.

Michael was quick as he undid Ashton’s jeans and brought them down his thighs and they were tight so luckily Ashton helped him out a bit by shimming his hips and using his foot to slide them off once they were down to his ankles.

Michael threw them to the floor and then moved to the side of the bed and tugged on hem of Ashton’s shirt.

“Do you want this off?” he said looking up at the boy and he watched as Ashton nodded and sat up a bit. Michael helped him get out of his flannel then tossed it before moving his hand up Ashton’s black shirt “Arms up” he said and Ashton didn’t hesitate to listen to him.

“Mhm” Ashton hummed after the shirt was off and he started to sink back into the bed and lay on his side “I like you taking care of me” his voice came out a little rough and Michael’s heart skipped a beat at his words.

Ashton always took care of them and it didn’t even occur to Michael that maybe Ashton wanted to be taken care of too. He felt like such a shitty boyfriend and he rubbed a hand through his own hair as he looked down to the floor and shut his eyes.

“Fuck, I’m sorry, Ash” he somehow managed to get out without crying and he suddenly felt Ashton’s hand on his thigh and slightly grip at it.

“For what?” he asked softly and Michael just shook his head and walked around the other side of the bed. He knew he would have to apologize and talk to Ashton tomorrow since he probably wouldn’t even understand what Michael was talking about right now.  
Before he slipped into bed he grabbed his empty glass of the end table and looked back up at Ashton.

“I’ll be right back” he whispered then he was going across the hall to fill the glass up with water.  
He came back to Ashton’s side of the bed and had the boy sit up a bit.

“Drink this” he said rubbing a hand through the front of Ashton’s hair and Ashton only took a few sips of it before pushing it away “Drink all of it, Ash” and Ashton took a double look at him before downing the rest of it. Michael remembers that he always felt a little bit better in the morning after drinking if he had a full glass of water before bed. He hoped that Ashton wouldn’t be sick at all tomorrow but he knew he wasn’t being realistic.

Michael went around the other side of the bed again, after he stripped down to his boxers, and got under the blankets. He put the covers over Ashton as well as he brought them up to Ashton’s chin and rubbed his arm that was under the covers as Ashton looked at him with tired eyes.

“I love you so much…you know that r-right?” Michael felt the need to say and he took a deep breath after he spoke, not wanting to cry right now.

“Yeah…yeah I know that” Ashton nodded in a fast motion and then he was pressing his chest right up against Michael’s and wrapping his arms around the pink haired boy. Michael held him back and started to rub one hand through the back of Ashton’s curls “I love you too, Michael…I love you a lot…like a lot a lot” he ended it with a giggle and Michael couldn’t help but smile as he kissed the side of Ashton’s head.

“Get some sleep, okay?” Michael said still keeping his lips against Ashton as he rubbed a hand up and down his back, feeling Ashton hold him even tighter nuzzle his face into his neck.

As Michael could hear Ashton’s breathing start to slow down he started to think about what Ashton said at the club and the words “I don’t hate you…you know that right? I don’t hate you at all” echoed through his head again. He had no idea why Ashton would ever say that and in his completely sober mind it was driving him even more nuts than it was in the club.

Ashton moved his legs a bit against Michael’s thigh then he could feel the strong smell of liquor as Ashton moved his face out of Michael’s neck and he could feel Ashton’s hot breath against his cheek before he felt Ashton press a soft kiss there and then he was letting out a breath. Michael closed his eyes at the touch as Ashton still kept his lips there and he moved his hand up to the back of Ashton’s neck as he rubbed the tips of his fingers against the skin there.

Ashton was pulling back only a little before he was leaning forward again and pressing two kisses down Michael’s jaw and Michael was getting chills at the soft kisses.

Ashton pressed one lingering kiss to Michael’s lips before he was slowly backing up and his drooping eyes blinked a couple of times before he was speaking.

“Can you…can you tell me you love me again before I go to sleep?” Ashton whispered and Michael had never seen him look so small and helpless. Michael trailed the backs of his fingers down Ashton’s cheek and leaned closer so that their lips were almost touching.

“I love you, baby” and it was only then that Ashton did a smile wider than Michael had seen all night then he was slightly pushing at Michael’s chest until the pink haired boy was lying on his back. Ashton laid his head on Michael’s chest as he ran his fingers up and down the boys’ tummy as he hummed a song that Michael didn’t recognize.

Michael for some reason felt himself looking past Ashton and he got a glance at the red numbers on the alarm clock just as it was striking midnight.

“Happy New Years, Ash” Michael whispered and he felt Ashton only shift in his arms a bit but he didn’t say anything back so Michael figured he was dozing off.

That was the last thing Michael remembered before he was dozing off completely.

*

As soon as Michael came into consciousness he was moving his hand and searching for Ashton’s body next to him. It wasn’t like him to search for someone next to him as soon as he woke up but he was just praying that Ashton wasn’t in the bathroom throwing up this morning. He would feel so bad if he was because last night Ashton had clearly not wanted to get drunk but he did just because Michael wanted him to.

When Michael felt nothing except the fabric of the blanket he quickly opened his eyes and just stared at the empty side of the bed for what seemed like hours. He could picture Ashton asleep on the tile floor in the bathroom and he clenched his eyes shut, really hoping that wasn’t the case.  
He wished he would have woken up to the feeling of Ashton against his chest like he had last night before he dozed off.

That’s what Ashton deserved; to wake up in a warm bed next to a person who loved him more than anything.

Michael felt his head start to throb with all the over thining (or because of his hangover) and he put a hand on top of his hair to try and stop the pain. When it didn’t help at all he sat up and decided that his main priority right now was the find where Ashton was.

The white painted wooden floor was cold as he got off the bed and he had to pause for a second and close his eyes from the sudden dizziness.  
He hadn’t got even nearly as drunk as Ashton had last night so he knew that if he was feeling as shitty as he was then Ashton was feeling it 100 times worse and that thought made him sick to his stomach (once again that could be the hangover getting to him).

The air in the hall was slightly colder than it was in his room and he shivered and took a step back just to grab the first thing he seen. It happened to be Ashton’s flannel that he was wearing last night and Michael held it between his hands and even from here he could smell the intoxicating smell of the curly haired boys’ cologne.

He slipped it around himself and just left it unbuttoned as the sleeves went slightly over his hands.

He walked only a few steps to the left before he was getting to the bathroom door. He didn’t want Ashton to be in there but honestly he knew that he had to check there first, considering the circumstances.

The door was cracked open just a sliver and Michael wished he would be able to see from out here if Ashton was in there or not but he couldn’t.  
For some reason he couldn’t let himself open the door and just stood there staring at it for god knows how long.

He finally grabbed the knob and pushed the door open in one push and he let out a breath when his eyes landed on the tile floor.  
Ashton wasn’t laying there like he feared he would be and he wasn’t sleeping with his head on the toilet either.

Michael started to think that maybe Ashton could hold his liquor better than he thought and he really wasn’t sick at all. It was a long shot but Michael had to at least try to think of positive things.

He started to walk further down the hallway and got to Luke and Calum’s room, expecting them not to be in there but when he opened the door they were both sleeping soundly on the bed.

He felt himself smiling for the first time all morning when he moved his eyes over the way Calum was laying on his side, close to the edge of the bed with one arm hanging off of the bed as Luke was spooning him from behind with his face in his hair and an arm around his waist.

Michael realized that he didn’t even check the time and it could be extremely early for all he knew. He started to skim his eyes all over the room, searching for a clock and finally he found one next to the window and it read: 9:20. Michael let out a breath and he couldn’t even remember the last time he was awake at this time.

He looked back to the two sleeping boys and contemplated going over to give them each kisses but he didn’t want to wake them and he still needed to find Ashton.

He let out a breath and slowly closed the door once again then started walking towards the steps, knowing that Ashton wasn’t anywhere upstairs.

He felt himself getting even more worried when the living room and kitchen were empty as well and he let out a breath as he did a spin and made sure to look everywhere once again. Michael glanced out the window and seen that the sun was shining bright just like it was when they arrived and Michael smiled remembering how excited Calum was when the first seen the ocean.

He decided that he needed to calm down a bit because Ashton was smart and knew how to take care of himself. There was no way that he was actually in any sort of danger so Michael let out a breath and started to make his way back towards the kitchen in the back of the house.

He grabbed a glass from the top cupboard and filled it with water, making sure to drink all of it because surely he was quite dehydrated and his throat felt so dry.

When he glanced out the window something caught his eyes so he quickly looked back up and seen the back of a figure in the wooden swing.  
He smiled and watched as Ashton ran a hand through his hair and kept it there until he was leaning his head back to look up at the sky. He seemed to be okay but Michael needed to be way closer to him.

Michael looked down and realized he was still in his boxers and he glanced around, finally seeing Luke’s black sweatpants lying on the back of the couch.  
He jogged into the living room and quickly put them on before making his way towards the back door.

When he got outside he was surprised at how warm it really was but then a slight breeze came and blew his bare torso and he was shivering.

As he got closer to Ashton the boy was unaware of his presence as he just hummed to himself like he had last night while lying on Michael’s chest. He was swinging just barely and he looked so content.

Michael came around the other side of the swing and Ashton was instantly looking a bit scared as he jumped but then he was letting a tired smile come over his face. Michael made sure to return it but he could see the bags under Ashton’s eyes and he could tell how unwell the boy felt.

Michael sat close to Ashton as their thighs touched once Ashton looked away from him and they just sat there in silence, swinging back and forth until Michael felt the need to break the silence.

“How are you feeling?” Michael said and he watched as Ashton pursed his lips and squinted at the sun before looking down to his lap and shrugging.

“I threw up in those bushes about an hour ago” he said nodding his head right in front of them and he had a slight smile on his face now so Michael let out a chuckle but he felt horrible. He put an arm around the back of Ashton just to rub a hand through the back of his hair and the action had Ashton looking over at him. Michael bit his lip and leaned over to press an innocent kiss on Ashton’s neck but the boy still shivered.

“Fuck, I’m sorry Ash” he said in almost a whisper as he leaned his forehead against Ashton’s cheek for a few seconds before he was looking at him again. Ashton looked utterly confused as he roamed his eyes all over Michael’s face.

“What are you sorry about?” Ashton spoke with a chuckle and Michael let out a breath, knowing that Ashton wouldn’t be mad at him but he knew what he did was wrong. Ashton was just such a good person that he was able to overlook the fact that Michael basically forced him into getting drunk last night. Michael felt like he was way more sorry for just that though.

He started to think about all the stupid things he got mad at Ashton over and all the time he gave him the cold shoulder; Ashton didn’t deserve any of that and Michael started to get that sick feeling in his stomach once again. He leaned forward and put his elbows on his knees as he rested his face in his hand and he could feel Ashton’s worried eyes on him

“Michael” Ashton spoke softly and only a second later Michael could feel Ashton’s hand massaging at his hair “Hey…tell me what you’re thinking about right now” Michael shook his head, feeling like he was actually going to start crying but Ashton’s soothing hand was really helping him to calm down. He let out a breath and clenched his eyes shut while his face was still in his hands. He knew these next words were really going to hurt to say out loud.

“God, I can never fucking get it right when it comes to you” his voice came out raspy and weak and he was actually hoping that Ashton hadn’t heard him but he knew the boy had when his hand stopped moving in his hair.

“What’re you talking about?” Ashton spoke breathlessly and moved his hand down to rub at the back of Michael’s neck, raising the hairs there.

“I’m a fuck up, Ashton. I’m always fucking up with you” Michael took a deep breath in but quickly began talking again “I’m always getting mad at you for stupid shit, I talk you into doing things you clearly don’t want to do and I’m just so on and off with you. I don’t even know why you treat me as good as you do cause god knows I don’t fucking deserve it” Michael felt himself sniffling and he let out a stuttered breath “I don’t deserve you”

“Michael…baby-“

“And I’m only like that with you” Michael whipped his head up to look at Ashton and he watched as Ashton’s eyes saddened at seeing Michael cry “I’ve never been mad at Calum or Luke and I’ve never tried to force them into getting drunk with me…so why am I like that with you? Why do I treat you differently than them?” Michael wasn’t asking Ashton these questions; he was merely voicing them out loud and hoping that he had the answers himself. Ashton’s eyes moved away from him only for a few seconds as he looked to the ground then he was closing his eyes fast and then looking back to Michael “Damn it, If I could take back every bad thing I ever did to you I would. I just don’t understand why I keep hurting you when I’m so fucking in love with you that it scares me; it scares the shit out of me how much I depend on you and need you around. What the fuck is wrong with me-“

“Michael stop” Ashton didn’t say it sternly but it was like he was begging Michael to stop saying all these things as he flexed his jaw and closed his eyes again, his hand moving over Michael’s back now.

“You know I’m right, Ash…and fuck, I especially hated myself even more last night. You looked so sad and just…miserable at the club and it was all my fault”

“It wasn’t like you poured the drinks down my throat, Michael” Ashton spoke way calmer than Michael but Michael could still tell that Ashton was thinking about everything that he had just said. Michael knew he had spilled out a lot but he just couldn’t help it.

“Yeah but you only got drunk because I wanted you to” Michael threw back and Ashton let out a breath as he took his hand off of Michael’s back and instead rubbed at his own face.

“I don’t give a shit about any of that” he said a bit sharply but then he was reaching out and rubbing the back of his fingers across Michael’s cheek “I don’t even remember anything that happened at the club last night but I do remember how you were before we went to sleep” and Michael sniffled and gave his full attention to Ashton at those words “You were just so caring and loving towards me and…” Ashton bit at his lip and looked to his own lap before focusing back on Michael again “I know how much you love me”

“I do” Michael shot out fast and he was nodding fast “I love you so fucking much, Ash”

“I know, baby” Ashton said cupping Michael’s cheek “Come here” and Michael sat up instantly. He leaned into Ashton’s side as he wrapped one arm around his waist then he nuzzled his face into Ashton’s neck as he felt the boy wrap one arm around him while the other one moved up to hold the side of Michael’s face as he kissed him anywhere he could.

“I promise…I promise I’ll stop being such a fucking asshole” Michael said seriously but Ashton chuckled and just pressed a kiss to his head.

When Michael leaned back, only because his neck was staring to hurt in this position, he immediately started thinking about something else entirely and Ashton grabbed Michael’s hand as he just rubbed at the top of it.

“You said something to me last night…at the club and it had me really confused” Michael said almost shyly as he looked down at Ashton’s hand holding his but then Ashton’s other hand was hooking under his chin, making him meet his eyes “Do you remember what you said?” and Ashton bit at his lip as he looked out at the beach but then he was shaking his head “no” and Michael nodded, kind of expecting that “You said that you didn’t hate me…and I wasn’t sure why you would say that cause I know you don’t hate me, Ash” he watched as Ashton just nodded and actually slightly smiled before he was rubbing at Michael’s hand again.

“Yeah…I uh…I kind of used to hate you a little” Ashton let out a breath “Because you had Luke and I wanted him..that was all it was and I guess in my drunk state of mind I started to think about that for some reason” Michael could tell how bad Ashton felt about it and he knew he had to admit something too because he wasn’t innocent either.

“When we met at that pizza place for the first time I kinda hated you too” Michael let out a chuckle and Ashton looked up at him and raised his eyebrows

“Yeah cause I seen the way you looked at Luke and…I was worried that you were gonna take him away from me cause I knew you easily could. I was intimidated I suppose”

“It feels like we all hated each other at some point” Ashton laughed and Michael agreed as he chuckled.

“Yeah I guess we did”

“But all of that got us to where we are now so I wouldn’t take any of it back” Ashton said seriously and Michael nodded.

“I wouldn’t either” he smiled and Ashton returned it before leaning in and kissing his lips and leaving them lingering there. Michael couldn’t believe how much better he felt after getting all of that out and telling Ashton how he felt “Let’s go inside” Michael said pulling at him and Ashton grinning against this lips before pulling back “Are you hungry?”

“Actually yeah” Ashton nodded.

“Well I’m gonna make you breakfast..come on” Michael said standing up and grabbing Ashton’s hands and Ashton was standing up then pressing himself against Michael, kissing him again.

“Mhm” Ashton hummed against Michael’s lips and ran his hands up his pale torso “I love seeing you wear my clothes” and Michael smiled wide before kissing him again and then just wrapped his arms around Ashton, just needing him closer. Michael just felt so alive and happy in this moment that it was overwhelming and he almost felt himself crying again but Ashton was holding him tightly and rubbing his back like he sensed it “I know you feel bad about hurting me but it’s fine okay? Cause no matter what I’ll always know that you love me” and Michael nodded quickly against him as he clung onto Ashton.

“I’ll always l-love you” Michael said out loud and he leaned up to kiss Ashton’s collarbone, just needing to kiss some part of him.

“And I’ll always love you”


	75. Luke

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter for today cause you guys deserve it cause I took so long to update..Muke is up next ;)

Luke was currently sitting lazily in the couch by himself as he was half watching the TV but most of his attention was on Michael and Ashton. He couldn’t help but notice how weird they’ve been acting all morning. He figured that Ashton’s excuse for being so sluggish and quiet was that he was feeling his hangover pretty hard but Luke really didn’t know what was wrong with Michael considering that last night he actually seemed quite sober.

Luke remembers coming downstairs with Calum right after they woke up and they seen Michael and Ashton sitting at the kitchen table not saying a word to each other.

They both seemed to put on fake smiles as soon as Calum walked in there to get a drink and Luke let his eyes linger on Michael before he was making his way into the living room.

That was where Luke had been for about two hours and he glanced behind him to see Calum sitting in the lazy boy chair that was against the back window, overlooking the beach. Luke thought it was beautiful how much Calum loved the beach and he just really wished it was warmer out so they could spend more time by the ocean.

He knew they would be coming back here during the summer though because Ashton seemed pretty adamant about his promise to them. Luke smiled at realizing that Ashton never broke his promises and he could picture all four of them swimming in the ocean in just a few short months.

Luke looked to his left when he caught movement in his peripheral vision and he looked to the kitchen to see Michael now standing up against the counter as Ashton was in front of him, resting both of his hands on the edge of the counter and looking at Michael like he was worried sick about him. Their faces were close and Luke watched as Michael looked down at the floor but in a second Ashton was putting a finger under his chin and making him look at him again.

Ashton was then leaning forward and pressing a kiss to Michael’s lips then forehead before he was backing up again and saying something that Luke couldn’t make out. Luke was sure that Ashton was trying to comfort Michael in some way though and he began to get worried again like he was this morning.

Luke felt his breath catch in his throat when Ashton was suddenly turning his head slowly to look right at him and Ashton gave him a small smile before looking back to Michael and saying something to him before Michael was looking at Luke too.

Luke watched Michael nod then he was making his way into the living room and Luke got excited when Michael was finally acknowledging him and coming to see him.

“Hi, angel” Michael greeted him once he got closer and Luke beamed just like he did every time Michael called him that, or really anytime Michael talked to him.

“Hi” Luke said quietly as he watched Michael sit next to him and face him.

“Are you okay? You look worried” and Luke let out a breath at that. Now he was sure that Ashton had told Michael to come see if he was okay. Ashton was always watching out for all of them and Luke got a warm feeling in his chest. He briefly looked back into the kitchen and watched as Ashton was pouring himself a cup of coffee.

“Are you and Ash…okay?” Luke asked and he watched as Michael reached a hand up to wipe away some of the hairs on Luke’s forehead.

“Yeah…we’re okay. Just had a talk this morning and got a lot of things out in the open” Michael finally said and Luke nodded. He was glad that was all it was but he was worried that Michael meant that they also had a big of a fight. It wouldn’t be the first time and Luke always wondered why Ashton and Michael fought more than any of them did. He guessed that it was because they both had strong personalities and sometimes they clashed. He knew that he and Calum were pretty quiet and reserved so that was why they never got in arguments with anyone else.

Luke didn’t say anything more and instead just moved over a bit so he could straddle Michael’s waist and Michael chuckled when the blond instantly nuzzled his face into his neck. Luke let out a content sigh when he felt Michael’s hand rubbing up and down his back in a slow pace and he swore he could fall asleep again because he always felt so comforted in Michael’s arms but also because he really didn’t get much sleep last night.

*

Luke must have fallen asleep because soon he was opening his eyes as he heard Ashton’s voice filling the living room and he opened his eyes to see Calum and Ashton both standing near the front door with jackets on.

“We’re gonna head into town” Ashton said glancing at Luke, only to look back at Michael “Probably get something to eat for tonight” and Luke felt Michael nod above him.

“You guys go” Michael spoke and Luke could hear the smile in his voice “I think it’s nap time for Lukey here” and Luke smiled into Michael’s chest and smiled even wider when Ashton flashed him one of his bright grins that filled his entire face.

Luke watched Ashton and Calum walk out the door and kept his eyes out the window as they got in the car and drove away and it was only then that he turned back to Michael with a smirk on his face. There was something that Luke has wanted from Michael ever since he got back from Florida and he was honestly getting very impatient.

“What?” Michael chuckled when Luke continued to smirk at him, while still seated comfortably on this lap. Instead of responding Luke ducked his head down and began by just putting the softest kisses to Michael’s neck. Michael started breathing heavier when Luke started to kiss more fiercely down his jaw as he gripped on his neck, moving Michael’s neck as he pleased so he could kiss him in different spots.

Luke began to rub his hands up and down Michael’s chest as his flannel shirt was still unbuttoned all the way. Even if Luke didn’t see Ashton wear it last night he still would had known it was his beause of how it smelled, it smelled exactly like Ashton always smelled and when Luke started to put kisses on Michael’s collarbone he could smell Ashton’s cologne even more and he felt himself getting even more turned on.

He started to just slowly grind against Michael and it earned a soft moan from the pink haired boy as he was rubbing his hands up and down Luke’s thighs.

Luke stopped grinding against him and instead just used his hand to palm at Michael’s dick and Michael let out a sharp intake of breath as Luke looked up to see him resting his head on the back of the couch and clenching his eyes shut.  
Luke took this opportunity to start sucking kisses up his throat and biting a bit when he got towards Michael’s jaw again.

“You made me a promise, remember?” Luke practically whispered into Michael’s skin and he kissed him a few more times on the neck before facing him.  
Michael picked his head up and instantly looked like he felt guilty.

“Fuck, I’m sorry baby” he said putting a hand on Luke’s jaw and pecking his lips “A lot has been happening and we just haven’t had the time”

“I know” Luke said, being understanding of it “But we have time now” and Michael’s smirk matched Luke’s when he heard those words.

“You’re right; we do” he said biting curiously at his lip while looking away from Luke and Luke was just about to move his head, wanting his attention again but then Michael was abruptly standing up and putting his arms around Luke’s torso, urging him to wrap his legs around him and Luke squealed a bit at the sudden movement but did as Michael wanted him to and then he was wrapping his arms around the boys’ shoulders.

Luke was giggling into Michael’s neck, loving how his boyfriend was holding him like this, all the way up the stairs and he loved how Michael was holding him up like the extra weight was no problem.

Michael clung onto him tighter and then one arm was falling off of Luke’s back as Michael pushed open the room that him and Ashton had stayed in last night.

Since they were in the room Luke was expecting for Michael to put him down, even though he didn’t want him to, but then Michael was pining Luke’s back against the wall next to the door as he began fiercely kissing and biting at Luke’s neck and Luke moaned out loudly at how intense Michael was being as he let out loud huffs of breath and held Luke like he was afraid he was going to go somewhere.

Michael put his hands under Luke’s shirt and started rubbing harshly, almost scratching up his back, as he started kissing Luke’s shoulder and collarbone.

“Fuck, Michael” Luke whimpered out with how turned on he was right now and it had felt like so long since Michael had touched him like this. He realized he had said that out loud when Michael spoke as he was heavily breathing.

“I know, baby boy” he said in a husky voice that reminded Luke so much of Ashton and Luke whimpered “I’m gonna make it up to you though; gonna make you feel so good, angel” Luke held onto Michael even tighter and he was feeling so painfully hard in his jeans that he knew he would lose his mind if he didn’t get them off soon. Michael picked his head up and started kissing Luke’s lips in the same intensity as the was kissing every other part of him and Luke put just as much force into it.

“M-Michael” Luke managed to get out and Michael hummed against his lips “Take my pants off…please” he begged and Michael nodded before putting his hands under his ass and beginning to walk them back to the bed. He made sure to put Luke down softly and Luke just laid there smiling up at his beautiful boyfriend.

Michael smiled back at him and bit at his lip before he was unbuttoning Luke’s jeans and beginning to slide them down his thighs. Once they were off Luke nodded towards Michael’s jeans.

“You too” and Michael nodded and got out of his jeans as well then slipped of his flannel so that he was only standing in his boxers. Luke took the time to take his own shirt off and leaned back into the pillows as he watched Michael going over to his bag to bring out the bottle of lube and then he was grabbing a condom but he looked skeptical of it and Luke knew what he was thinking because he was thinking the same thing.

“Don’t want a condom” Luke said out loud and it had Michael looking at him and smiling softly before coming back over to him.

Luke watched in awe as Michael crawled up to him on his hands and knees until he was hovering right above him. Luke almost let his eyes close when Michael began to run his hand up his chest again but this time it was in a much softer way like he was just admiring Luke and Luke didn’t want to miss a second of it. Luke watched Michael’s face as the boy trailed his fingers up his side and over his ribs before he was leaning down and pecking softy kisses down the middle of Luke’s chest.

Michael was then stopping and positioning his face right above Luke’s as he kept rubbing a hand up his side.

“I’m going to make this perfect for you, baby” he spoke quietly and Luke practically melted from those words and he knew his face was beat red but he didn’t even care.

“It will be perfect no matter what...cause I’m with you” Luke spoke back just as softly and he watched as Michael closed his eyes tightly like the words him in hard and Luke couldn’t help but lean up and kiss both of his cheeks. When Luke leaned back into the pillow he cupped his hand on Michael’s cheek and the boy was instantly rubbing his face against it before kissing Luke’s palm right as his eyes began to open again. Michael leaned his head down so that his lips were almost touching Luke’s before he began to speak.

“I’m so fucking in love with you” Michael whispered and he rubbed his nose against Luke’s, making Luke giggled and pull Michael all the way on top of him as his arms gave out on him.

“I’m so in love with you too” Luke said back and it caused Michael to connect their lips in one of their passionate kisses again as they breathed heavily into each other mouths and Luke couldn’t stop touching Michael everywhere he could reach.

Michael began to rut against Luke like Luke had been doing to him downstairs and Luke whimpered as soon as their clothes cocks came into contact.

“Michael please” Luke moaned out because he was already so close and Michael nodded, probably being just as close as Luke was.

“I’ve got you, baby” he said sternly but still in a caring way and Luke knew that Michael would take care of him so good.  
When they were both completely naked Michael spread Luke’s legs open and rubbed his hand over the pale skin a few times before grabbing the lube bottled and beginning to coat his fingers.

As soon as Michael got one finger in him Luke remembered doing this with Ashton so he knew what was going to come out of this and he already missed the feeling so much.

Michael began to thrust his pointer finger slowly in and out of Luke and Luke looked down to watch Michael’s face as Michael watched him back. This whole situation felt so intimate and it had Luke getting that much closer; Michael always had a way of making him feel so special and loved.

When Michael got the third finger in him Luke had his eyes clenched shut as he pushed his head back into the pillow and he was letting out loud moans with every thrust of Michael’s fingers.

“Mhm” Michael hummed with his lips against Luke’s thighs as he kissed them lightly then Luke looked down to see Michael looking up at him “You are so beautiful” and Luke felt his stomach tightening at those words and also because Michael happened to thrust his fingers right into his prostate as those words slipped from his lips.

“Mi-Michael…fuck” he was so out of breath and felt pleasure going through him as Michael kept hitting his spot over and over “Michael I…fuck I need to feel you..please” thankfully Michael nodded and only thrusted his fingers in a couple more times before he was slowly retracting them and Luke let out a breath but he hated how empty he felt down there.

He watched as Michael stood up straight on his knees and began to pump his dick with lube on his hands and Luke couldn’t stop biting at his lip, just wanting Michael to be inside of him already.

Michael let out a whimper at the contact on his dick but then he was opening his eyes and smirking at Luke and Luke about came right then and there. Michael was just being so cocky and sexy and Luke was panting by the time Michael lined his dick up with his hole.

“You good?” Michael said softly and his cocky attitude was gone and just back to his caring one. Luke smiled and felt his heart beating in his chest as he nodded.

He let out a stuttered breath once Michael began pushing slowly into him and he felt Michael’s comforting hand on his thigh as he tried to soothe him.

As Michael pushed deeper into him Luke felt so full but it felt so good and he was pulling at his hair and tensing his stomach up, trying so hard to not come. He knew he wouldn’t last long.

When Michael bottomed out Luke watched as Michael clenched his eyes shut and bit at his bottom lip hard before he was leaning down and resting each of his hands next to Luke’s head. Luke felt so full down there and tried to calm down his breathing by just looking up at Michael’s face above him as Michael was opening his eyes and just gazing down at him like Luke was his entire world.

Michael leaned down to press a kiss to Luke’s lips and just hovered there as he breathed heavily against this lips and Luke rubbed his hands up and down Michael’s sides, knowing it was taking a lot for Michael to not move right now.  
Luke was in pain, no doubt, but he knew Michael would go slow with him so he patted Michael’s side before speaking.

“Fuck me, Michael” he whispered and instantly went red at the words but Michael’s eyes seemed to darkened as he let out a few breaths then he was nodding fast and slowly backing out of Luke before going back in and Luke shivered at the friction.

“Shit, baby” Michael let his head drop so he was looking down at Luke’s chest and Luke started to rub at his hair “You feel so good”

When Michael pulled all the way out and thrusted back in with a little bit more force Luke let a moan slip from his lips as it started to feel good and he put a finger under Michael’s chin to make the boy look up at him. Michael’s eyes locked on Luke’s again and he scooted up to rest his forehead against Luke’s as he breathed heavily and began pushing even rougher into him but Luke couldn’t stop moaning at the feeling of Michael being rough with him.

“You…you o-okay?” Michael whispered and his lips moved against Luke’s when he spoke.

“Feels so good Michael” Luke let out a loud whimper when Michael sped up his hips “Fu-fuck!” Luke practically screamed when Michael hit his spot and he felt Michael smirk against his lips before hitting the spot over and over and Luke was feeling shivers constantly run down his body at how good Michael was making him feel right now.

“I love you” Michael said in a rough voice and Luke began moving his hips up, meeting Michael half way because he could tell Michael was close so his hips were beginning to stutter “Fuck I love you” Michael said louder than before and Luke clenched his eyes shut as his tummy started to get tingly.

“Michael” Luke moaned out and Michael kissed him fiercely as he stuck his tongue in Luke’s mouth and Luke couldn’t hold back any longer “I love you” Luke said right before he was releasing against his and Michael’s stomach.

As Luke was coming down he felt Michael thrusting even faster and harder to him as he was panting and looking straight into Luke’s eyes and Luke swore he could come again just by the way Michael was hungrily looking at him.

“Come on, Michael” Luke spoke, knowing Michael was close “Wanna feel you fill me up” and Luke really couldn’t believe he had said something so filthy but he was just so turned on by the way Michael was gazing down at him. Michael seemed to love hearing those words because he was letting out a moan that filled the entire room before he was letting out curse words over and over and letting his forehead drop to Luke’s chest as his hips still stuttered a few more times.

“Shit, Luke” Michael said out of breath as he fell entirely on top of Luke and Luke started rubbing a hand through his damp hair that must have gotten like that from the sweat.

Once he got the energy he slowly pulled out of Luke and Luke whimpered a little so Michael kissed his lips and then started pressing kisses all over Luke’s face and Luke giggled.

Michael was then dropping back down on Luke and Luke was still heavily breathing as Michael rested his head on his chest. Luke started to rub at his hair again as his other hand rubbed up Michael’s back and he felt Michael’s eyes starting to fall.

Luke remembers Michael kissing his chest and pulling a blanket over them before he was letting his eyes close too.


	76. Calum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A cute Cashton chapter to warm your soul

All Calum could see was darkness from the red bandana that was covering his eyes as he slowly walked. Ashton’s big hands were holding his own that were quite a bit smaller as the boy walked backwards and led him as they walked.

Usually Calum would be terrified in such position where he didn’t know where he was going but he was with Ashton and when he was with Ashton he knew he would always be safe.

Plus it was hard to be scared when Ashton’s thumbs were rubbing against his skin and every now and then Ashton would giggle and lean forward to kiss a part of Calum’s face.

Calum continued to take baby steps as he could feel the ground beneath his shoes and the cold breeze was slightly blowing his hair but he was wearing a hoodie and Ashton’s dark green jacket so he wasn’t cold at all.

“Ashton” Calum whimpered, growing impatient of where they were going.

“We’re almost there” Ashton laughed out and soon Calum felt Ashton’s lips press against his forehead.

Calum could tell that they were now walking up a hill and the breeze seemed to only intensify the further they walked.

The ocean breeze smell was now so strong that Calum kept taking deep breaths just so he could smell it more and he felt so at peace.  
The hill seemed to end a bit as they stepped onto flat ground and he felt Ashton’s hands pull away from his only to feel them on his face and Calum smiled, knowing that they were at their destination and that Ashton was going to take the bandana off of his eyes.

“Alright” Ashton spoke to himself as he began to untie the back of the bandana and Calum was practically jumping up and down with excitement “We’re here” Ashton said just as the bandana was coming off of Calum’s eyes and Calum blinked a few times as his eyes were blurry just a bit and the first thing he seen was Ashton’s smiling face but it was when he looked at what was behind Ashton that had Calum’s mouth dropping open.

“Oh my god” Calum said in awe as he looked all around and Ashton stepped out of the way so that he was standing next to him as Calum’s eyes roamed all over.

Calum didn’t even know how high up they were but he knew they were high because he could see the entire city from where they were. The blue ocean stretched as far as the eye could see and all the buildings and houses were so small that Calum could pinch them between his fingers if he wanted to.  
They were standing up on a cliff that he knew was filled with beautiful green grass in the summer and Calum thought this scene was so beautiful.

He felt Ashton’s arm wrap around his shoulders and Calum instantly pressed his face into Ashton’s neck as he held the boy back and closed his eyes.  
Soon they were both sitting on the ground with Calum in between Ashton’s leg like Luke had been on the beach that day and Ashton’s arms were wrapped snuggly around his chest; Calum swore he could stay like this forever.

“How did you find this place?” Calum breathed out and he felt Ashton’s face rub against the back of his hair before he was kissing in the same place.

“My mother” Ashton spoke those words like it was painful to say and Calum felt bad for even asking now. He knew how Ashton felt about both of his parents and that last thing that he wanted to do was make Ashton sad or uncomfortable “She grew up in this town so every time we would come visit her sister she would bring me, Lauren and Harry up here. She stopped bringing us up here when my dad left though but as soon as I got my license I would come up here any chance I got” Ashton let out a sigh and held Calum tighter like he was trying to comfort himself and Calum leaned his head back to kiss Ashton’s cheek and he seen Ashton smile. Calum kept his head rested back on Ashton’s shoulder so he could look at the boy “I love this town, Cal. I love everything about it”

“Maybe we could all move up here…” Calum said in an excited voice and Ashton grinned down at him and kissed his nose.

“Maybe we could” Ashton kept smiling and Calum just couldn’t look away whenever Ashton smiled.

As he looked up at his beautiful boyfriend Calum started to picture what life would be like if they all got a house in this town. He could picture having breakfast with them every morning out on the patio and then going down to the beach and swimming until after dark.

This little town was so peaceful and welcoming and Calum knew he could live here for the rest of his life. In all honestly though Calum knew that he could live anywhere as long as he was with his boy’s. They were the source of his happiness so anywhere they were he would be happy.  
He only snapped into it when he felt the backs of Ashton’s fingers go across his cheek and Calum closed his eyes at the feeling.

“I think I lost you there for a second” Ashton smiled down at him and Calum rubbed his face against Ashton’s shoulder.

“Just thinking….” Calum drifted off as he looked back to the blue water “Thinking about how it would be to live here with you guys”

“Yeah? And what do you think?”

“I think it would be amazing” Calum did a soft smile up at him and Ashton closed his eyes before pressing a kiss to his lips and keeping them there.

“Me too” he whispered before deepening the kiss and starting to rub a hand up and down Calum’s arm.

Calum just enjoyed the feeling of Ashton rubbing his hand anywhere on his body that he could reach as they both looked out into the ocean but there was something that was on the tip of Calum’s tongue. He remembered how Michael and Ashton seemed off with each other all morning, remembered how Michael kept shooting Ashton sad glances when he wasn’t looking and how Ashton would do the exact same thing when Michael was focused on something else. He didn’t know what had gone on between them but he knew something had happened and he felt like he needed to tell Ashton something about the pink haired boy that he had kept to himself up until now.

“I think you should know something about Michael” Calum practically whispered and it had Ashton looking down at him in a confused way.

“What do you mean, baby?” Ashton spoke when Calum didn’t open his mouth again to speak while he was thinking about how to go about telling Ashton this.

“When Michael loves someone he really loves them…he loves them so much that he spends almost every waking hour thinking about how he might lose them someday” Calum finally said and he took a deep breath. He started to think back to a time when Michael’s hair was still a dirty blond color, when his knees were always dirty from playing outside and his favorite thing to do during recess time was to play on the swings; that was when Calum fell in love with Michael.

Calum looked back to see Ashton sadly looking out into the ocean and opening his mouth like he wanted to say something but the words just weren’t coming out so Calum decided to keep talking.

“In 3rd grade we had a pet guinea pig and his name was Chip because he was brown like a chocolate chip” Calum spoke and he looked over to see Ashton cracking a smile a bit as he still looked out into the ocean in front of them “Every week it was a new kids turn to be in charge of taking care of Chip and I still remember how Michael was when it was his turn” that had Ashton turning back to Calum and looking his face up and down, silently begging him to continue “He fed and refilled Chip’s water bowl every chance he got, whereas most of the other kids in our class would only feed him and give him water once a day like they were supposed to but Michael he..he smothered chip a bit. He would only pet him through the cage and he would never take him out like everyone else did. It was obvious that Michael really loved Chip so I always wondered why he never wanted to take him out of the cage. One day some kid asked him that very same question and Michael told him that if he took Chip out of the cage then he might run away and never come back again. Michael just really didn’t want to lose Chip so he over cared for him and always made sure he was safe in his cage” Calum bit at his lip and forced himself to look up at Ashton who had a sad look on his face “On the last day of 3rd grade though Michael finally let Chip out of his cage. He told his friend that it was time for him to let go so Chip could be happy. I remember we were all outside when Michael brought the cage out with him and he carefully took Chip out so he could hold him. He looked so happy but it didn’t last for long” Calum said sadly as he knew the worst part of the story had to said now “Chip uh…he somehow got away from Michael’s grasp and he ran off. We never seen him again and Michael was crushed. I remember he kept crying at random times for the rest of the day and when you’re young something like that seems like the end of the world” Calum watched as Ashton’s eyes widened a bit then went back to their normal size like he was realizing what Calum was trying to tell him.

“Shit” Ashton mumbled as he ran a hand over his face and looked down at the ground.

“Michael loves you; He loves you so much but somewhere in the back of his mind he knows that the possibility of you leaving him is strong and that feeling tends to bring out the worst in him sometimes. He’s just…terrified Ash” Calum spoke the last thing in a whisper and he watched as Ashton rubbed at his eye as if he was wiping a tear away so Calum leaned forward and kissed his cheek and brought a hand up to rubbing at the back of Ashton’s hair.

Ashton didn’t say anything for the longest time as if he was repeating everything that Calum had just said to him in his mind. Calum didn’t want to render Ashton into silence but he knew that it was something that Ashton had to know about Michael. He was hoping that this would help him and Michel.  
He felt Ashton’s head resting on his shoulder as the wind picked up again and Calum rested his head against Ashton’s.

“Ash, are you okay?” Calum just had to ask and he felt Ashton nod against him.

“Yeah…” Ashton said so hesitantly and it didn’t give Calum much faith that he was telling the truth “thanks for telling me that. I needed to hear it” he said in a small tone and Calum just kept rubbing at his hair as the boy began to close his eyes at Calum’s touch.


	77. Ashton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have the ending of this fic very well planned out and I have for a while but it’s just the middle parts that I’m having trouble with…anyways I hope this is okay. This fic is starting to come to an end but I have no doubt that it has run its course lmao I mean this is the longest fic I’ve ever written and it’s honestly wearing me out but the ending will be great to write and I know you guys will love it

Ashton was laying awake with the clock going on 1am as he started out the window in the corner of the room. He was just looking up at the stars because he knew this would be the last night in a while that he would see them. Where they lived the city lights were too bright to ever be able to see them and Ashton just really enjoyed looking at them when he got the chance to. Maybe it was because he wasn’t used to seeing them that he loved them so much but he just knew he couldn’t look away from them.

Calum was sprawled out on his chest as he had been fast asleep for hours and Ashton just kept massaging his hand thorugh the boy’s hair as his other hand rested on the small of his back.

Ashton just couldn’t bring himself to go to sleep while he was thinking so hard about what Calum had told him up on the cliff earlier in the day. He honestly doesn’t think he had stopped thinking about it sense Calum told him and Ashton knew that wasn’t healthy but he just couldn’t help it.  
He couldn’t stop thinking about 3rd grade Michael; about how even back then Michael loved so passionately that he didn’t want to let the thing that he loved out of his sight for even a second.

It was a simple story that Calum told but Ashton felt like he knew Michael so much better now that he had heard it. Maybe now he finally felt like he understood the pink haired boy and he could help him now when the boy was feeling down. Ashton would always offer comfort and kind words when Michael was sad or upset about something but now he felt like he could really help him when he was like that. He just needed to tell Michael that he was staying and that he wasn’t going anywhere because that is what Michael has always been the most scared of; losing the people he loves.

Ashton looked across the hall and thought about how Michael was only a few doors down from him but he just needed him closer. It was their last night here and even though this bed was small he just felt like they should all be together; not to mention that Ashton was feeling extra clingy and missed Luke and Michael terribly even though he had spent basically all day with them.

Ashton carefully took his hand out of Calum’s hair and grabbed his phone as he started to rub his other hand on Calum’s back.  
He stared at his texts and finally clicked on Michael’s name, taking a couple deep breaths for some reason.

Michael had been acting off with him all day and he was afraid that Michael felt like he had spilled too much out to Ashton this morning and now he was feeling empty. Ashton didn’t want him feeling like that because he really appreciated Michael telling him all those things this morning.

_To: Michael (1:12)_   
_You awake?_

After all, the last thing that Ashton wanted to do was ask Michael to come in here if he had just woken up. He also hoped that the boy had his phone on vibrate so it didn’t wake him up because Ashton knew he would feel bad.

The dark skinned boy breathed warm air onto Ashton’s chest and Ashton looked down to see his eyelids fluttering a bit like he was having an intense dream. Ashton rubbed his fingers down Calum’s face and scooted down the bed a bit so he could kiss the top of his head.

Ashton jumped a bit when his phone made a sound.

_To: Ashton (1:14)_   
_I am now_

And maybe Ashton was just worrying too much but he felt like Michael was upset at him now and he regretted even texting him in the first place. Sometimes he felt like he was walking around on egg shells when it came to Michael and now was one of those times.

_To: Michael (1:15)_   
_Sorry I woke you…you can go back to sleep_

Ashton decided that would have to do and hopefully Michael would just fall back asleep but Michael was Michael so he knew he wouldn’t.

_To: Ashton (1:16)_   
_Are you okay? It must be important if you’re texting me at 1am_

And Ashton chuckled a bit at that as he could almost hear Michael saying those words in a slightly worried tone but also a pissed off one.

_To: Michael (1:18)_   
_Just missed you that’s all…its okay I’ll just see you in the morning_

Ashton laid there staring at his phone, wanting a response but not really expecting one because he was sure Michael had gone back to sleep by now.  
He let out a breath and closed his eyes as he let his head rest on top of Calum’s as the boy was still fast asleep.

Ashton jumped a bit when he began to hear footsteps but instantly smiled when he seen the figure in the doorway.

The moon light from outside was making Michael’s pale torso almost look silver and his pink hair was falling on his forehead as he crossed his arms across his chest with a smirk on his face.

Ashton thought he looked gorgeous but to be fair Ashton always thought that.

“Missed me already huh?” Michael spoke only just above a whisper, probably seeing that Calum was asleep and not wanting to wake him up.

“I always miss you when you’re not with me” Ashton said and he knew it sounded clingy but it was the truth and Michael always deserved to hear what was from his heart.

He watched as Michael looked out the window as he licked his lips as if he was just thinking about what Ashton had just said before he was walking across the room with small steps.

He got to Ashton’s side of the bed and looked the sleeping boy on Ashton’s chest as he ran a hand through his finger then he was sliding under the covers in the small space next to Ashton.

Ashton brought the blanket up to the pink haired boys’ chin as Michael wrapped an arm around his torso and then Ashton was wrapping his other arm around Michael’s shoulder.

He slowly trailed his fingers down Michael’s spine under the blanket as he felt goosebumps begin to form and Michael just snuggled further into his chest as he let out a content sigh.

Just as Ashton began to think about the fact that Luke was all alone in the other bedroom the blond was coming through the door and instantly smiling wide at the sight in front of him.

“I had to pee first” Luke whispered and Ashton chuckled as he watched Luke slip in the bed next to Calum as he got under the blankets then glued himself to the back of Calum.

“You’re a liar, Ash” Michael suddenly spoke and Ashton let out a breathy laugh before gazing down at him.

“What?”

“You said we couldn’t all fit in one bed” Michael simply replied and Ashton just nodded.

“Guess I was wrong” Ashton chuckled and he smiled even wider when Michael pressed a kiss to his chest and hugged him tighter.  
Ashton fell asleep kind of dreading having to wake up the next day because he knew it meant that they had to go home and then start school the next day.

It had felt like years since he was back in school and most years Ashton found himself missing it while he was on break but now he didn’t miss it at all.

He loved having all this spare time with his boy’s and he knew that would change a bit once school started.

He did have summer to look forward to and Ashton knew that it would be his best one yet.

*

When they were leaving the beach house the next day Ashton watched carefully in the rear view mirror as they pulled onto the bridge the separated the town from the country and he seen Luke and Calum both looking out their windows as they cross over the blue water. He could see the evident sadness on both of their faces and he felt so bad.

“We’ll come back guys” he spoke and both boys were looking at him “I promise” luckily they both smiled before looking back out the window and Ashton felt a warmness wash over him when Michael grabbed his hand that wasn’t resting on the wheel. He looked over and the pink haired boy was also looking out the window as he had both of his feet rested on the dashboard so that his knees were almost touching his chest.  
He had to make his eyes move away so that he didn’t crash but he still couldn’t help but glancing at all of them every few minutes during the drive back home.

*

By the time they were entering their town it seemed so different than when they left and honestly Ashton figured it felt different because he felt like a different person now.

Not that much had happened between the boys, they had a very simple trip, but somehow Ashton felt like he knew so much more about all of them.  
As they started to pass the bigger buildings in town the lights were brighter and Ashton took this time to glance in the backseat and he smiled at what he saw.

Calum and Luke both were both lying on their sides as their head were laid down in the middle seat and Luke’s hand was on Calum’s back like he had been rubbing at it before he fell asleep.

Ashton turned to look at Michael and seen that he was wide awake as his eyes flickered over everything they passed.

Their hands weren’t laced together anymore after they had stopped at a gas station and just didn’t hold hands again once they were in the car again so Ashton patted Michael’s knee and the boy was looking at him instantly.

“You ready to go back to school?” Ashton joked btu Michael still rolled his eyes before he was now looking out the front window.

“Fuck no” he said sternly and Ashton laughed before patting his knee once more then putting it back on his own lap.

“What, are you?”

“Hardly” Ashton laughed “I mean it will be cool to see Connor but that’s about it” when Michael didn’t respond or even hum at his words he looked over to see the boy looking like he was feeling slightly guilty as he bit at his lip and watched the cars pass by them.

“You’re allowed to hang out with him you know?” Michael said softly, looking at Ashton and Ashton furrowed his brows at the boy, not sure what he meant “I mean he was your friend before you were with us and if you miss him you can hang out with him and we won’t be like upset or something”

“You trying to get rid of me?” Ashton smirked and even in the darkness of the car he could see Michael blushing as he looked down at his lap.

“Of course not” Michael chuckled back “I’m just saying that you don’t need to feel like you have to be around us all the time…I mean we’ll miss you if you do hang out with him but we’ll survive”

“I like being around you guys all the time though” Ashton responded after thinking it over and realizing what Michael was trying to say to him “I’d way rather be around you guys than any other person” and Michael chuckled at that.

“You’re such a sap”

“It’s true” Ashton shrugged and then he felt Michael’s eyes on him so he looked over at him and all he could see on the pink haired boys face was fond and love. He watched as Michael picked up his hand that was still on his lap and gave the back of Ashton’s knuckles a few kisses before he was settling their hands on his own lap.

*

When they pulled in the driveway they woke Calum and Luke up in the softest way possible and then they were all walking into the house. They were all exhausted so they decided to just get their bags sometime tomorrow cause none of them felt like doing it tonight and that was for sure.

Michael’s house did feel like home as they all stepped in it and Ashton breathed in the comforting scent of it as they entered the living room.

They all walked tiredly up the stairs and Calum and Luke were collapsing face first into the bed before Michael and Ashton did which caused the two older boys to laugh as they walked closer.

They were all so much closer than they were before break and Ashton wondered if school would be different now.

He was out to Connor now and he could freely kiss his boyfriends in front of his friend without worry and Ashton was really looking forward to that.  
He wasn’t out to the rest of the school but Ashton didn’t need to worry about that right now or ever really. In a few short months he would be totally free of everyone in it.

Ashton and Michael both got on the bed as well and snuggled close to their boyfriends as the muffled sounds of the TV downstairs put them to sleep.


	78. Calum

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since it’s so hard for me to get on my computer lately I’ve decided to just upload the rest of the fic…like I have it finished so I figured I would just post it all and what I’m uploading today will be a little over 12,000 words so I hope you guys love it! (more notes at the end of the fic)

Calum let out a sigh as he was close to the mirror in the bathroom right off of Michael’s bedroom. It wasn’t like he hated school as much as he did before but he was just really dreading having to go back after the long and amazing break he had just had.

He knew that going back to school meant that he wouldn’t be able to spend as much time with his boys and that was the thing that he was most upset about. He wouldn’t be able to have breakfast with all three of them anymore because Michael always got up at the last second on school mornings so they never had time. They also wouldn’t be able to sleep in and take lots of naps during the day and that was only naming a few things that they wouldn’t get to do anymore.

He had to keep telling himself that summer was only a few months away though and then he would have three full months with the boys and Calum couldn’t wait.

In the past he would spend his summer days inside and playing video games while he ate his weight in junk food. He was almost more depressed in the summer than when he was in school because during the summer he realized how alone he really was.  
Calum knew that this summer all of that would be a thing of the past and as he put his mascara on he could picture spending all day at the beach with the boys.

Fourth of July was always his favorite holiday and usually he would spend it on the roof of his house alone but this summer he knew they would be spending it together and Calum knew it would be incredible.

“Cal you about ready?” Michael’s voice suddenly echoed in Calum’s ears as the pink haired boy was probably at the end of the steps.

“Just about!” Calum yelled back and he quickly finished his eyelashes before putting on a bit of pink lips gloss that he actually hadn’t worn in front of any of the boys yet so he was excited for them to see it.

Calum dropped the lip gloss back in his makeup bag and put it neatly in the corner of the bathroom counter before dashing out door.

When Calum ran down the stairs Michael was leaning against the bottom of the railing on his phone and Calum didn’t expect Michael to even look up with how hard he was concentrating. Calum yelped in surprise as Michael smacked his ass as he walked past the pink haired boy and Calum looked back to see Michael still looking down at his phone but he had a smirk on his face and Calum blushed even though the boy wasn’t even looking at him.

Calum made his way into the kitchen to see Ashton sat on top of the counter as he ate an apple and looked out the big bay window by the dining table.  
His eyes instantly went to Calum though and a wide mile formed on his face at seeing the dark haired boy.

“You excited to go back to school?” Ashton said with a smirk and Calum just groaned and rolled his eyes, causing Ashton to let out a chuckle and grab Calum’s hip to bring him in between his legs. Calum of course went without a fight and put both of his hands on Ashton’s thighs.

Ashton smiled at him again, he hadn’t really stopped since Calum walked in the room, before he was pressing a kiss to Calum’s forehead and then leaning back. Ashton looked down and then looked down again before smirking.

“Why do your lips look even more kissable than usual hm?” and Calum blushed at Ashton’s words.

“I umm…” Calum just sometimes still felt himself getting nervous around the other boys just because they were so beautiful “I’m wearing lip gloss” Calum spoke in shy tone as he looked down at his hand that was resting on Ashton’s thigh as he moved his thumb a little.

“Mhm” Ashton hummed, smirk still present on his face, before he leaned forward to gently kiss Calum’s lips and then he licked his own lips “Watermelon?” and Calum giggled before nodding. Ashton really was something else.

*

Calum arrived to school with all his boys by his side and Calum couldn’t remember a time when he felt so safe during school.

The school still seemed the exact same as when he left but it was somehow different because his attitude towards it had changed. He just didn’t dread it as much as he used to now that he actually had people to hang out with and he knew they would always be there for him. He also had people to eat lunch with now and Calum smiled at the thought of that.

“If, for some reason I don’t see you guys before school lets out” Ashton began as he started to walk backwards towards his locker and Calum for some reason felt himself getting worried “I gotta pick my brother and sister up from school cause my mom can’t” and Calum let out a breath “But I’ll be over after that” he said with a smile and Calum could tell that Ashton didn’t like being away from them either.

“Sounds good but the show starts at five alright?” Michael said and Calum smiled again.

Ashton and Michael had both been obsessing over this new show for weeks now and the first episode was to air after they got home from school today. It was a horror show and Calum wasn’t too big on them but he knew he would watch it anyways.

“Wouldn’t miss it, baby” Ashton said sending a wink towards Michael and Calum blushed even though it wasn’t directed at him. Ashton was just so charming “We’ll order pizza and the whole sha-bang” he said in his normal talking voice while looking at Luke and Calum now and Calum nodded fast; he honestly couldn’t wait.

*

Calum had actually been doing good all day long, even though he barely seen all of the boys, but he found that he had actually missed a couple of his classes.

He was heading towards the lunch room and now and knew he would be seeing Luke and Ashton on account of them having the same lunch as him.

He slipped into the double doors and loud voices hit his ears as he glanced all around.

He squinted as he looked outside in the court yard and smiled when he seen that Luke and Ashton were already out there just like they said they would be.

“How’s your day been, pup?” Ashton said as soon as Calum sat in the grass in front of them.

Ashton was sat against the tree trunk wearing a thin jacket and his sunglasses that made him look like a movie star and Luke was sitting next to him in a criss cross position as he kept putting chips in his mouth.

“It’s been good” Calum said honestly and Ashton seemed to be happy that Calum hadn’t been miserable “We started a new assignment in English where we have to write about a musical influence that has helped us” and Calum felt so excited about this topic.

“Really?” Luke said looking interested “Who you gonna write about?”

“Either All Time Low or You Me At Six”

“Great choices” Luke smiled wide and Calum felt a warmness rip through him “Maybe you could write about both?”

“I might have to” Calum chuckled “It’s too hard to choose”

“Who do you have for English?” Ashton asked, before taking a sip of his orange soda.

“Mrs. Case” Calum replied.

“Guess that means I’ll be getting that assignment as well then” Ashton smiled.

They spent the rest of the lunch period talking about music and helping Ashton to decide on what he was going to write about for the assignment and Calum felt so at ease as they all talked on the grass. He began to think that he would always feel this happy and at ease as long as he was with his boy’s and that school would be so much different now that they had grown so close with each other. Calum knew he’d be okay and that he would be able to get through his school year with no problem.


	79. Ashton

Ashton was just walking out of the chemistry class, after saying his goodbye’s to his boys and promising them that he would see them after he dropped off Harry and Lauren at home, before he was colliding with another body.

Ashton smiled wide when Connor was standing in front of him looking like he missed the hell out of him.

“Long time no see huh?” Connor smirked and instead of answering Ashton just smiled even wider and then brought the boy to his chest and hugged him tightly. He had missed his best friend like crazy.  
Connor let out a chuckle into Ashton’s chest before hugging him back just as tight then they were separating.

“Where you been the last few days?” Connor asked “I stopped by your house but your mom said you were out of town”

“Oh…yeah” Ashton rubbed the back of his neck “I went to my aunts beach house”

“Alone?”

“No” Ashton shook his head then he remembered that he didn’t have to hide anything from Connor anymore; Connor was aware of his relationship with Calum, Michael and Luke and he let out a breath “I went up there with Luke, Cal and Michael”

“I figured” Connor smirked a bit and Ashton blushed as he looked down.

“Yeah” and then Ashton felt a sting of guilt as he looked back up at his best friend “Listen…I’m sorry we haven’t had time to hang out. I’ve just been….” Ashton drifted off, not really knowing how to explain it “Preoccupied” he decided and Connor just nodded.

“I get it, Ash” Connor nodded “I can tell how much they mean to you; it must be hard having to be away from them” and Ashton couldn’t believe how understanding Connor was being because truthfully Ashton had been a bit of dick. He knew he should have at least attempted to contact Connor during the break.

“Yeah…it really is” Ashton breathed out.

“We’ll catch up later alright?” Connor said and Ashton didn’t hesitate to nod.

“For sure, man”

“Alright” Connor gave him a stern nod before smiling “See ya around” Connor was then turning around and making his way down the halls that were becoming empty since school was letting out and Ashton didn’t start heading to his locker until Connor was out of sight.

*

Ashton sat in his car right in front of the Elementary school that he once attended. It seemed like a century ago and he watched as crowds of kids came running out as the last bell rang.

If he tried hard enough he could remember exactly how the school smelled and how excited he used to get before recess.  
In a way things were more simple back then but he also felt alone a lot of the time. He never had many friends back in Elementary and he spent most of his lunch periods alone.

Something changed in Middle School though when Ashton got into sports and he finally started to make friends, which was when he met Connor.  
Ashton snapped out of it when he looked to the side to see Harry and Lauren running towards his car like they hadn’t seen him in years. Ashton knew he hadn’t been home much lately but he had just felt so happy with Luke, Calum and Michael and even if it sounded selfish he just didn’t want to give that up.

He knew Lauren and Harry would be fine though as long as they had each other.  
Suddenly Lauren was coming up to the passenger seat and hopping in as Harry opened the door directly behind Ashton.

“How was school guys?” Ashton said looking back at Harry and then at Lauren sitting next to him.

“Stupid” Lauren muttered but before Ashton could try and ask her what was wrong Harry was going out on a tangent on how great his day was but Ashton still kept a worried eye on Lauren the whole time.

As they were pulling onto their road Harry finally stopped going on and on and that was when Ashton looked over to see Lauren still pouting in her seat.  
When they pulled into their driveway Harry was running out of the car right as Ashton stopped the car and Ashton let out a laugh before turning to Lauren.

“Alright, what’s up?” he said ruffling her hair but she shoved him away and he frowned again “Come on, Lauren” he watched as she continued to pout but she seemed like she was going to say something as she shifted in her seat and uncrossed her arms.

“None of the boy’s at my school like me” she mumbled and Ashton felt his heart break a bit at that “They all think I’m weird and they always laugh at me”

“Well they’re all idiots then” Ashton said simply because he remembered how stupid he was when he was in Elementary school.

“Well…” Lauren seemed less mad now and just seemed sad “When will they stop being idiots?”

“Maybe college…if you’re lucky” Ashton let out a chuckle, knowing how long it took boy’s to mature.

“Well I don’t want to wait that long. Every other girl in my grade has a boyfriend except for me”

“I know having a boyfriend might seem like the most important thing right now but it’s not. How ‘bout you just wait it out?”

“I guess” she mumbled and Ashton ruffled her hair before reaching for his door.

“You’re too good for all the boy’s in your grade anyways”

“How do you know?” she said in a smart ass voice and Ashton laughed again “You haven’t met any of them”

“Well no…I haven’t but I remember how I was in elementary and I was a moron” Ashton said and he smiled and counted it as a victory when his sister smiled wide and just nodded “So you good?”

“Yeah” she nodded as he began to open her door and Ashton followed.

They walked side by side up to the door and Ashton opened the door for his sister before he walked in after her.

Once again his home seemed foreign to him and it was so less homey than Michael’s house was. Ashton began to wonder that maybe Michael’s house felt so comforting just because he had all his boy’s there. Here in his own house none of them were anywhere in sight and Ashton let out a sigh, already missing them but he knew he owed at least a bit of his time to his sibling since he wasn’t around much anymore.

He looked over to see Harry already on the couch with a bowl of cereal as his eyes were glued to the screen and he was curled up with a blanket and Lauren was making her way towards the kitchen to eat as well.

Ashton wasn’t sure when his mother would be home, so he could leave, but he hoped it would be soon.

*

He was only sitting on the couch with his siblings for less than a half hour before there was a couple knocks at the door.

He knew it wouldn’t be their mother because even if it was locked he knew she had the key.

Ashton got up when the knocking continued and it was actually starting to annoy him.

He fast walked to the door and nearly ripped it open.

“Jesus Christ, what-“ and Ashton froze as he looked at the person on the other side of the threshold. It felt like the Christmas party all over again as he felt like he was going to throw up but he also felt so upset that this man was once again making an appearance.

“May I come in?”

“No” Ashton shot back “You can’t”

“Please. We need to talk”

“I don’t want to talk to you” Ashton said sternly, hoping the man understood that he still wanted nothing to do with him.

Ashton glanced back to see his siblings giving him a worried look as they sat close together on the couch now. Laruen was moving her head over though, trying to see who was on the other side of the door.

“Just leave okay?” Ashton practically begged, not wanting his siblings to see him yell at their father like they had many times before.

“I think you’ll like what I have to give to you” his father said in too happy of a tone, shifting on his feet as he stood in his grey suit that he always used to wear to work.

Ashton let out a huff and looked back at his siblings once more time before focusing on his father.

“Fine” Ashton for some reason felt himself saying as he gritted his teeth “Make it quick” he said pushing the door more open as he turned around and walked into the living room.

“Hi daddy!” Lauren said standing up but Ashton was quick to put a hand on her shoulder then he looked to Harry.

“Go upstairs, guys” he said softly but it had his siblings giving him weird looks as they stood frozen “I said go upstairs” and that time both of them began walking towards the stairs with their heads down. Ashton knew his dad and he knew how angry the man made him so he didn’t want his siblings to have to witness that, like that had many times before.

Ashton watched as they both climbed the stairs quickly then they were both turning down the hall. It was only then that Ashton faced his father.

“Okay, what do you want?” Ashton practically spit out and he seen his father flinch but then he was reaching into his back pocket.

“I don’t know why but this got delivered to my house instead of yours” he said and Ashton looked down to see the older man bringing out a white envelope “As soon as I seen the address of it I just knew what it was and I knew I had to bring it to you”

At this point Ashton wasn’t even listening to what his father was saying and instead his eyes were glued right to the address on the white envelope. He felt his heart beat picking up as he read it over and over and then his father was putting it closer to him and saying something that Ashton couldn’t make out since he was so concentrated on the envelope.

Soon Ashton felt himself reaching out and taking it like someone from the outside was guiding him to do it. His hand was shaking as he felt the paper on his fingers and looked at the envelope even more closely.

He never thought that he would see his name and Florida State University on one envelope. This is what he had been dreaming about ever since he seen his first Florida State game with his dad when he was young; it was what he had been working for all his life.

“Ash…open it” his father’s tone was soft and any other time Ashton would have called him out for calling him that but at this point he couldn’t even open his mouth.

“You…you haven’t opened it yet?” Ashton whispered and his father was looking at him like he had three heads as he shook his head.

“No…I wanted you to open it”

“I can’t” Ashton shot out and again it felt like someone made him say that.

“Why not?” his father seemed to be getting angry and Ashton backed up a step “Son…your future is in that envelope. You’ve wanted this your whole life-“

“How do you know that I even got in?” Ashton almost yelled.

“Well I don’t. We won’t know until you open it” and that was it. His father said “we” and Ashton felt a chill run down his spine. It was always his father pushing Florida State on him and it was his father that stood over his shoulder as he wrote a letter to Florida State, asking to be accepted into their school. He was only seven years old when he wrote the letter and he knew his father never sent it in but it was like he was demanding that Ashton have interest in this school.

“I don’t want to open it” Ashton said back and this time it really felt like it was his choice to say that.

Ashton flinched when his father was ripping the envelope from his grasp and Ashton watched in surprise as his father ripped it open like there was a million dollars lying inside of it.

He held his breath as his father took the piece of paper out of the envelope and he flicked his eyes up to see the man widening his eyes as he used his other hand to put it over his mouth.

Before Ashton didn’t care about opening it but now the suspense was killing him and he just wanted to know if he got in or not.

“Dad” Ashton said breathlessly, just begging to hear what it said and he couldn’t even remember the last time he spoke those words because the man in front of him didn’t even seem like his father.

His dad was looking up at him and then handing the paper over to him but Ashton still couldn’t make his eyes go down to look at it so he closed his eyes then he felt his father’s hand on his shoulder.

Ashton swore his heart was going to beat right out of his chest as he awaited his father’s words.


	80. Michael

Michael had been moving his leg up down in a quick motion for the last ten minutes as he looked up at the clock.

It wasn’t as if Ashton gave them a direct time that he’d be home but it was just that they were halfway into the new show that they’d been looking forward to for weeks and Ashton still wasn’t here.

Michael knew that Ashton wanted to see this show just as bad as he did but yet he wasn’t here and it wasn’t like Michael was mad at him but he was actually starting to get worried about where Ashton was.

It was going on 5:30 and Michael couldn’t even concentrate on this show that he had been so excited to see.

He of course had sent several texts to Ashton but he got nothing back as a response which was very rare when it came to Ashton.

“He’ll be here” Luke suddenly said and Michael looked down to see Luke’s hand on his knee so he still his leg and let out a breath.

He looked down the couch and seen Calum resting his head on Luke’s shoulder as he kept taking drinks of the juice box that Luke had gotten him a few minutes ago.

Luke and Calum both seemed calm but yet again Michael was the one losing his mind here. It always felt like he was the one overreacting and he hated himself for it because maybe he really was getting worried and stressed out for nothing.

There was a scream coming from the big screen TV on the wall and Michael jumped when Luke flinched against him.

He again leaned over to look at Calum and seen the boy now nervously chewing on his straw.

Luke and Calum weren’t horror fans at all and Michael began to feel bad for putting them through this; especially when he himself wasn’t even paying attention to it.

Michael cranked his neck as the front door was being opened and a tired looking Ashton was walking in. His appearance reminded Michael of the sad shell of a man that Ashton looked like when he was at the bar that night and Michael hated seeing him like this once again.

His feet were moving across the carpeted floor of the living room before he could even think about it and he was walking up to Ashton.

“Hey” Michael said softly and Ashton looked up at him with empty eyes “What’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry I’m late-“

“I don’t care about that” Michael shot out quickly as he shook his head. He had cared about that before but now that he was seeing Ashton look so hurt he just wanted to know what made him like this and he wanted to make it better “What happened?”

“Nothing” Ashton shrugged and suddenly his wall was coming up. The wall he built up when he pushed all his feelings away and tried to act like the strong one. He was then chuckling and Michael stepped closer to him “My brother and sister just wore me out…I’m tired” and even though Michael could see right through the curly haired boys’ lie he decided not to press it right now. He just wanted to get Ashton under a warm blanket and hopefully he would talk when he felt ready.

“Well ummm” Michael tried to focus on other things and looked back to the TV “You missed the first half but it’s actually just starting to get good” and Ashton was nodding before walking towards the couch, or rather dragging himself there and Michael followed.

He watched as Ashton collapsed next to Calum and instantly put an arm around the boy as the three of them engaged in a small conversation about what had happened in the show so far.

Michael let out a breath and took a seat on the other side of Luke and he still felt himself not being able to pay attention to the show, knowing that something had happened to Ashton and that he was hurting.

*

After the show ended they all decided to watch some happy movie so that they didn’t have nightmares (that was Luke’s idea but they all thought it seemed reasonable). Ashton stretched his arms above Luke and Calum and Michael watched his every move.

“We forgot to get pizza” Ashton chuckled and it almost seemed like he was back to his happy self but Michael could still hear the sadness in his voice “I’ll buy it but my wallet is in my pocket…over in the breeze way” and Luke and Calum both groaned which made Michael smile then he was standing up.

“I’ll go get it” and Michael felt a warmness run through him when Ashton smiled at him, especially since he could tell how down Ashton really felt.

When Michael got into the breeze way he spotted Ashton’s jacket right away and slid his hand into the pocket closest to him and only came up with something that felt like a piece of paper so he retracted his hand and checked the other one and grabbed $20 out of Ashton’s black wallet before turning on his heels but he only got to the door of the breezeway before he was stopping again.

Michael bit at his lip and pocketed the $20 so he could play with his fingers which was a thing he did when he was either nervous or thinking hard about something and this time it was both.

He for some reason began thinking about the slip of paper in Ashton’s other pocket and he didn’t know why he was so curious about it.

Sure it could just be homework but Michael doubted it because Ashton would most likely need a book to do his homework and there wasn’t one here.  
He bit at his lip before he quickly turned around before he lost the courage to do what was eating away at him and he put his hand back in the pocket with the slip of paper.

When he brought it out he quickly realized that it wasn’t a paper but in fact an envelope and Michael gulped loudly when he read the top of it.  
Florida State University was written in the corner of it and it was honestly Michael’s worst nightmare.

The thought of Ashton going away to college and leaving them behind made a monster out of Michael merely because he knew he couldn’t live without the boy and it scared him to death that he might have to.

In a way Michael didn’t even want to open it but he knew he had to or it would eat away at him.

He was sure that Ashton would tell them eventually what the envelope said but Michael knew he couldn’t wait for that.

He reached in the already opened envelope and held his breath as he started to unfold the paper.

He read the Dear Ashton Fletcher Irwin at the top before closing his eyes and trying to slow down his heartbeat. He knew he had to calm down before he read the rest of it.

He knew that if Ashton got in he would be absolutely crushed and heartbroken at knowing his boyfriend was moving so far away.

On the other hand if Ashton didn’t get in he knew how heartbroken Ashton would be and Michael didn’t know which one would be worse because either way he would fell absolutely horrible and Ashton would too.

Michael opened his eyes to read the rest of the letter. His heart was beating fast as he skimmed over the letter and he wasn’t really fully paying attention to it because he just wanted to know if Ashton got in or not. It was driving him crazy and the letter seemed to ramble on and on.

It was easy to stop reading after he read the words “You’ve been accepted” and Michael rested one of his hands on the wall to keep himself from falling over.

One part of him was so happy for Ashton but the selfish side of him hated this letter and wanted to rip it up into a million pieces.

Michael neatly folded the paper back up and put it back in the envelope before putting it back in Ashton’s pocket and backing up a few steps to just stare at where the envelope was through the fabric.

Michael knew he should be happy for Ashton because any good boyfriend would be ecstatic about something this big.

He had to push his selfishness away and he knew he had to be happy for Ashton even if it meant that he would have to live without him.

Michael actually felt emotionless as he walked out of the breezeway and he felt all the boy’s looking at him but he knew if he met any of their eyes, especially Ashton’s, he would just break and hate himself for it.

“Here” Michael said quietly as he handed the $20 to Ashton and Ashton didn’t respond, instead just took it and Michael could feel the boys’ worried eyes on him but he just still didn’t look at him and sat down on the couch once again.

*

Michael tried to focus on the movie and not think about the letter but it was no use so at one point he decided to just look out the back sliding glass door at the moving trees.

He found that he couldn’t even enjoy his pizza when it came and he knew that was a big red flag for all the boy’s because Michael always was the one to eat the most pizza but tonight he could barely even finish his first slice before he started to feel sick. He just had no appetite what so ever.

When he put his half finished pizza on the table in front of them he turned to see Ashton’s eyes on him and then in an instant he was standing up and Michael was worried that he had upset the boy.

Michael watched him walk all the way over to the kitchen archway and then he was turning around and nodding towards the sliding glass door.  
Michael understood what he meant and then he was standing up but he felt Calum and Luke’s eyes on him now.

“I’m uh…just gonna get some air” he muttered out and Luke managed a smile but Michael felt so weak that he couldn’t even return it. He just nodded at the blond boy and grabbed his cigarettes off the end table before slipping out into the fresh air.

Michael slumped down in one of the patio chairs and kept moving his leg up and down in a nervous way as he waited for Ashton to come and talk to him.  
He wasn’t exactly looking forward to what Ashton had to say to him but he just wanted to get it over with.

Maybe Ashton was actually going to tell him that he got into Florida State and Michael would be torn between just acting like he was hearing it for the first time or just admitting that he seen the letter in his pocket.

This realization made Michael even more nervous and he lit up a cigarette before putting his head back and blowing the smoke up towards the sky.  
It was then that he heard the door opening but Michael still kept his eyes locked on the gloomy clouds above him but he could still see that Ashton had sat down across the table from him.

“I thought you quit” was the first thing that Ashton said and Michael almost wanted to chuckle at that because he hadn’t once said that. He had just been smoking a lot less lately because he was so happy and he never smoked when he was happy; he just didn’t.

“I thought you wanted to talk” Michael said in a tone way too snippy and he hated himself for it straight away. He looked at Ashton when he spoke and Ashton seemed to almost flinch at the attitude that Michael was giving him.

For the longest time Ashton just looked at Michael like he was a complete stranger and Michael hated it.

“Why are you being like this?” Ashton asked softly and Michael gritted his teeth, not wanting to cry because of how sad Ashton seemed in this moment.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” Michael mumbled and he flicked his eyes up to see Ashton’s face turn to anger instead of sadness and Michael was so scared of what the boy was going to say next.

“You promised” the sadness seemed to flicker in his eyes as he looked out into the yard but it was gone in an instant as he looked back to Michael “You promised you’d stop fucking around like this with me” and Michael felt his heartbreaking but he wouldn’t cry; he couldn’t.

“I’m not fucking around-“

“Would you cut the shit, Michael?” he snapped and it seemed so out of character for Ashton that all Michael could do was widen his eyes and “And just tell me what is going on with you. What the fuck did I do this time?”

“You didn’t…” Michael was having trouble with talking right now with how upset Ashton really was at him “You didn’t do anything” at that Ashton seemed to calm down a bit as he fell back in his chair and just gritted his teeth as he looked around the yard again like he couldn’t even stand to look at Michael.

Michael knew he was to blame for Ashton’s behavior but he hated it. He always hated how he made Ashton feel like this.

“Why do you keep pushing me away like this?” Ashton whispered so quietly as he still kept his eyes on the yard. Michael sat there with his mouth slightly parted as he tried to think of an answer for that but he just didn’t have one. He guessed that it was because he didn’t want Ashton to think he was weak but he knew that was way too stupid to say aloud so he looked down to his lap and kept pulling at his bracelets on his wrists to try an distract himself

“Michael” Ashton spoke more assertive this time and Michael knew the boy was looking at him now.

“I…I don’t know” was all that Michael could think of to say and it had Ashton letting out a breath and in the corner of his eye he could see the curly haired boy getting up from his seat. Michael didn’t want the boy to leave but he couldn’t open his mouth either. He just stared as Ashton refused to look at him and Michael flicked his eyes all over as Ashton just shook his head to himself as he turned to walk towards the back door.

This was all new for Michael and it was making him so uneasy. Usually Ashton would pry and pry until Michael gave in and just told him what was wrong but this time it was like Ashton was giving up on him and the thought of that made Michael sick to his stomach.

He knew he had to change. He couldn’t keep putting Ashton through this and he knew he couldn’t ever handle seeing Ashton look so discouraged and upset with him ever again.

Michael watched the window as Ashton was now inside and he was sitting next to Luke and Calum again. Luke was instantly looking at him with a worried frown on his face and Michael seen Ashton mouth something to him that made Luke frown even more before the older boy was putting an arm around Luke’s shoulder and pressing two kisses to his temple before pressing a kiss to his cheek. The affection of course had Luke smiling but he still seemed worried and Michael hated that he was hurting everyone around him.

He knew Calum would be worried too if not for being asleep with his head on Luke’s lap. He smiled to himself as the boy only rubbed his face further into Luke’s thigh before stilling once again.

Michael looked up and flinched when he seen that Luke was now staring straight at him, looking just as disappointed in him as Ashton did and Michael couldn’t stand it any longer.

He made himself look away from the blond boy and he turned his chair a bit just so he wouldn’t be tempted to look back at him.

He lit another cigarette and he had a feeling that he would be smoking at least half the pack tonight with how depressed and stressed out he was right now. There was so many things going through his head and he just wanted it to stop. The thing that was driving him the most insane though was that Ashton would be leaving them in only a few short months and Michael actually felt tears pricking in his eyes as he began thinking about how life would be without Ashton. He honestly didn’t know how he was going to get past it and he was really getting sick of thinking about it but he just couldn’t stop his brain from returning to back to that thought.

*

Michael wasn’t sure how long he just sat outside in the patio chair but he knew it was a while because it was pitch dark now and the only sound around him was the light traffic on his road and the crickets in his backyard.

It was the first time he looked back into the house since he caught Luke looking at him and he saw Luke now guiding a sleepy Calum towards the stairs. He watched them climb all the way up them before he was focusing his eyes back on the main floor but he really wished he wouldn’t have.

Ashton was sat on the edge of the couch with his elbows on his knees and his face resting in his palms and Michael’s chest was actually hurting at seeing Ashton like this; and it was all because of him.

Michael was fighting back tears once again and he prayed that Ashton wasn’t crying. He knew he would run in there and throw his arms around Ashton if he were though.

Soon Ashton was picking his head up and luckily his eyes didn’t look red but his hair was all messed up and he just looked so sad and Michael couldn’t stand it.

He watched as Ashton stood up and then began walking towards the back door and Michael put his eyes back down to the cement under his feet.  
He swallowed hard when he heard the back door shut but he still didn’t look up at Ashton.

“What, are you just gonna sleep out here?” Ashton spoke with a slight annoyance but honestly Michael didn’t blame him one bit. Ashton really should be straight up yelling at him with how badly Michael has treated him and he knew that; but Ashton was just such a good person and Michael was reminded every day that he didn’t deserve someone so good.

“Are…are you mad at me?” Michael didn’t even remember telling his mouth to say that but it came out anyways and he wanted to punch himself for sounding so pathetic. He heard Ashton let out a sigh then Michael was looking up at him as the boy ran one hand through his hair before letting his hand fall and focusing on Michael again.

“I just want to h-help you” Ashton’s voice cracked and it was barely above a whisper. It wasn’t what Michael was expecting since Ashton had been so cold with him before but now it seemed like Ashton was sad again as he bit on his lip and looked to the ground.

Michael felt his eyes pricking at the sight of Ashton and he couldn’t help but let out a snuffle then he was putting a hand over his face, not wanting Ashton to hear him snuffle again or know that he was crying.

He was looking down at his lap again but he could feel Ashton slowly walking towards him like he was afraid of scaring him off.

Soon Ashton was only a few feet away from him and Michael looked up to see him with his hands in his hoody pocket as he searched all over Michael’s face.

Michael all of a sudden thought back to Ashton’s departure from them. Thinking about how he wouldn’t ever get to touch or see Ashton probably ever again or at least for a very long time.

Thinking about that again was why Michael moved his face away when Ashton went to touch him on the cheek and he knew he wouldn’t be able to see the hurt on Ashton’s face so he closed his eyes as he felt new tears coming. He could feel the intense hurt from Ashton though and it was driving him insane.

“Michael” Ashton whispered and Michael just shook his head as he kept his head down low and his eyes clenched shut.

When he opened them Ashton was gone.

*

Another hour went by before Michael was walking into his own bedroom to see the three boys stretched out in the bed like they always were.

Calum was in the middle of Luke and Ashton, just like always, and there was an empty spot on the far left of the bed where Ashton was laying.

The older boy was laying on his stomach as his bare back was showing and the blankets were only covering his hips and down.

Michael walked up to the bed and at first just sat on the edge of it.

He started to slowly run his hands down Ashton’s tan, bare back and he checked to see if the boy stirred or not.

Ashton still laid there asleep as his mouth was shut and the pillow was covering half of his face.  
Michael laid down on his side and faced Ashton and started running his fingers up and down his back again, just touching him because he could and also because he really needed it right now.

He actually wished that Ashton was awake right now so he could apologize a million times and tell him how much he loved him.  
He moved his hand up to the back of Ashton’s hair and started massaging into it in a way he knew he himself loved; doing it to Ashton was somehow comforting to him though.

He stilled his hand when Ashton moved his face further into the pillow and let out a small breath then his lips stay parted as he stilled once again.  
Michael stared up at the ceiling for hours, thinking way too much and letting his thoughts eat him alive. He honestly didn’t know how much longer he could handle this.


	81. Ashton

Ashton awoke with a flinch and it felt like all those times that he was half asleep then suddenly it felt like he was falling and he would jolt away, feeling terrified for a few seconds. Ashton just hummed into the pillow before letting his eyes fall once again.

Ashton flinched once again a few seconds later but this time he heard the vibration of his phone on the side table and he realized that was what woke him up the first time.

He groaned and moved to reach his arm towards the table and took his phone in his hand without opening his eyes.

When he did open his eyes the light from his phone made him clench them shut for a few more seconds then he was focusing on the time on his phone.

It was currently 2am, on a damn school night, so he had no idea who would be trying to contact him at this time of night.

He unlocked his phone and still flinched when the white background of iMessage popped up but there were no new messages.

He groaned, feeling a bit confused, but then he was going back to his home page to click on the phone picture on the bottom.  
Just as he was about to look at the recent calls his phone was vibrating once again and a call was coming in.

He didn’t even look at the name of the person who was calling him before he was picking up.

“Yeah?” Ashton said in an exhausted tone as he used his other hand to make a fist and rub at his eye.

“Ash? Fuck, thank God you picked up” the voice spoke and Ashton sat up quickly, feeling the tiredness wash away as soon as he heard the worried tone his friend.

“Connor? What’s wrong? Are you okay?” Ashton spoke quickly and he now noticed that there was a lot of background noise.

“Yeah...I’m fine, Ash” Connor was still so on edge so Ashton was going crazy here wondering what could be wrong “It’s Michael, man” and Ashton’s heart felt like it had fallen to his stomach as he actually coughed a few times, choking on his own air.

“What the fuck are you talking about? Connor, what’s wrong with him?” and it was only then that Ashton looked over and did notice that the side of the bed that Michael always laid on was empty and cold.

“He’s fine” Connor spoke and Ashton swore he was about to punch his friend for getting him so worried “He’s fucking wasted though”

“Where the hell are you?” Ashton said standing up and already going over to the dresser to grab a pair of jeans and a shirt.

“We’re at the bar on 5th street. I was in here with a few of my buddies and Michael comes in here and just instantly started downing drinks” and Ashton felt speechless. Had Michael even come up to the bedroom at all tonight? He felt so guilty for not dragging Michael upstairs and making the boy come to bed with them. He knew he should have tried harder to get Michael to open up to him then maybe they could have resolved whatever problem Michael was having and none of this would have happened.

“Okay just keep him there” Ashton said putting the phone between his shoulder and his cheek as he slipped on a pair of Michael’s skinny jeans, or Luke’s…he wasn’t sure “Can you see him? Like are you still with him?” There was a pause then Ashton thought he heard the sound of a door opening and suddenly the background noise was even louder then it was gone again.

“Yeah he’s still sitting at the bar. There’s no way he’s going anywhere though…I mean he looks like he’s going to pass out” and Ashton groaned again.

“Damn it” he said through gritted teeth because he was so upset with Michael for doing this to himself “Alright I’ll be there in 10” Ashton spoke and he hung up before he gave Connor a chance to respond.

He glanced at Luke and Calum still asleep in bed and he figured they wouldn’t wake up so he walked out of the bedroom as quietly as possible but he was jogging down the stairs, just needing to be with Michael right now.

*

The ride to the bar was hell and Ashton couldn’t stop tapping his fingers on the wheel in nervousness. He knew that Connor said that Michael was fine but Connor didn’t know the whole story, hell he didn’t even know a piece of it. Michael was in fact not fine at all and Ashton didn’t care what he had to do but he knew he would be getting down to the bottom of Michael’s problem tonight. Drunk or not they were going to talk about it.

*

When Ashton pulled into the parking lot of the bar he was surprised at how packed it really was and he also started to wonder what the hell Connor was doing at a bar at 2am but he knew he wouldn’t ask about it since he was so focused on Michael at the moment. He quickly parked his car close to the building and got out of the car wearing a dark green jacket. He still shivered as the wind hit him and he could barely even see in front of him with the dim street lights around him.

The bar was in a sketchy spot and once again he was confused as to why Michael chose this bar, of all places, and he also wondered why he even came out to drink at all.

Ashton knew something was bothering the pink haired boy but he would have rather the boy woke him up to talk or cuddle or something, anything besides leaving in the middle of the night to go drink.

The place was of course insanely loud and Ashton was already so irritable because he just wanted to get Michael home and be away from all this chaos.  
A drunk guy bumped into him and nearly spilled his drink all over Ashton and Ashton swore he was about to punch the guy in the face, if it wasn’t for him wanting to get to Michael already. He instead shot the guy a dirty look before flicking his eyes to the bar and searching for Michael.

The bar was stuffed full of people so he realized he would have to get closer in order to be able to see him.

When his eyes landed on Connor at the very end of the bar he let out a sigh of relief and he began walking closer to him.  
It was only when he got closer that he realized Michael was nowhere in sight and he started to panic once again.

“Connor!” Ashton shouted over all the loud voices and Connor was instantly looking over at him with a panicked look of his own and that only worried Ashton even more “Where is he?” Ashton said sternly and in the back of his mind he felt bad for being so harsh to his best friend but he just needed to know where Michel was. Maybe he was in the bathroom, Ashton thought but he just had a very bad feeling right now as Connor bit at his lip and looked down at his lap “Connor!” Ashton said actually reaching out and shaking his shoulders to get his attention again.

“I tried to stop him. Fuck, Ash I really tried to but he wouldn’t listen” Connor was speaking loud but his tone was still so soft and worried.

“Where. Is. He?” Ashton said sternly.

“He fucking- he left, Ash and I’m so sorry. I promise I tried to stop him but he wanted to leave”

“Fuck!” Ashton cursed loudly as he looked around the bar and then a horrible thought occurred to him and Ashton felt like his legs were going to give out on him “No… no no no” Ashton put a hand over his face as he shook his head “Did he drive? Please- please tell me he didn’t drive” Ashton’s voice was so much weaker now as he was looking at his friend again.

“Yeah…” Connor said like it hurt him to say “He said he was going to drive somewhere else...said he had to get away” and honestly he had no idea where to even start, Michael could be anywhere by now “I followed him outside and seen him fishing his keys out of his pocket and I even tried to take them from him but he got really mad and honestly I thought he was going to punch me, Ash” and Ashton just nodded. He knew how stubborn Michael could be and he knew he shouldn’t be mad at his friend right now, especially since he had tried so hard to stop him.

“It’s okay” Ashton said looking down at the floor but patting Connor on the shoulder “Did he…like say anything before he decided that he wanted to leave?” Ashton was just asking any question that could help him find where Michael was.

He had tried calling Michael a dozen times on his way here so he knew there was no use in calling him again since it was obvious that his phone was dead.

When Connor didn’t respond right away Ashton looked up to see him visibly holding something back and Ashton started to get upset again. Why would Connor want to hide anything that might help him find Michael? He thought to himself.

“Connor” Ashton used his stern voice once again “What did he say?”

“He said…” Connor drifted off as he looked down at his lap then Ashton seen him take a deep breath in “He said ‘What do I have to do to make him stay?’” and Ashton felt like everything was coming into place. Michael had seen his letter in his jacket. Ashton thought back to what Calum had said up on the cliff and Ashton all of a sudden knew why Michael was behaving the way he was “You got in didn’t you?” Connor snapped Ashton out of it and Ashton just stared at him with wide eyes, still thinking about Michael “To Florida State…you got in” and this time it was more of a statement than a question but Ashton felt himself nodding. He got in but he wished he wouldn’t have. He knew that Connor was about to congratulate him by the way his face seemed to light but Ashton didn’t even want to hear it. He just needed Michael.

“I have to find him” he said to himself and then he was on his heels and turning towards the door.  
*  
Ashton felt frozen as he sat in the driver’s seat, still parked in the bar parking lot, because he literally had no idea where to even start looking for Michael. Since Michael was driving he could also be anywhere and that included outside of their little town.

The thought of Michael being behind the wheel of a car while he was drunk made Ashton start to feel sick to his stomach again with worry and he just wished that he could have Michael safely in his arms right now. Michael was somewhere out there all by himself and it was killing Ashton in the worst way.

Ashton started the car and knew that if he sat in this parking lot any longer that he would drive himself insane.  
He started driving out of the parking lot and decided to turn to the right because that was where the main part of town was and Ashton would just look in every parking lot for Michael’s car.

Michael loved Chinese food and for some reason craved it even more when he was drunk so Ashton knew he would have to check the three Chinese restaurants in their town also.

Ashton felt a bit better now that he had a bit of a plan of where to look for Michael but worry was still bubbling in his head.  
He began going through the main part of town and looked in every parking lot for Michael’s car but most of the parking lots were empty at this time of night so it was easy for Ashton to look at all of them.

He got through most of them fast and then he was coming to the more woodsy part of town and he let out a breath as he rolled the windows down. He felt so desperate that he almost started yelling Michael’s name out the window but he held his tongue; there was no use.

Ashton jumped at the sound of his phone ringing and he doesn’t think that he has ever picked it up so fast in his life; it didn’t even make it to the second ring.

“Michael? Michael! Fuck are you okay?” there was a long pause and Ashton was panicking just like he was back at the bar “Michael!”

“It’s Connor, man” said the sad voice on the other end and Ashton felt so angry that his friend didn’t say right away that it was him and not Michael.

“Okay what?” Ashton snapped a bit but he was so on edge and Connor knew it; hopefully his friend understood.

“I just remembered something that Michael kept saying to me when he first got the bar and I don’t know if it will help you find him or not but I figured I would tell you anyways”

“Okay what’d he say?” Ashton said instantly, not even giving Connor a chance to take a breath.

“He just kept going on and on about how you looked when you play football. He kept talking about the time in gym that we played flag football. He was kind of rambling but he talked about it until I told him that I had to go to the bathroom and that was when I called you” Connor let out a breath when he was done and Ashton was a bit more patient this time “I don’t know if that will help you find him but I hope it does” Ashton remembered looking up at Michael from the field on that day during gym class and he remembers it like it was yesterday. Even back then Michael looked so proud of him and it makes his heart beat pick up even thinking about it.

“I think…” Ashton froze when he looked ahead and seen a big stretch of green grass that looked closely to what a football field looks like “I think it does” he said slowly “Fuck, thank you Connor” he shot out and he thinks it’s the nicest he’s been to his friend all night.

“No problem. Go find him, Ash” and Ashton felt himself nodding before he was hanging out and turning the car around in one of the close parking lots.  
He was headed in the opposite direction now and he sped way faster through town than he should have but he didn’t care. He had to check this spot and just hope that Michael was there.

Bad thoughts started to enter his mind as he thought about drunk Michael driving. Michael was a bit of a reckless driver even when he was sober and this thought made Ashton grip the wheel and go even faster.

He started to take shallow breaths as he got closer to his destination, just scared that he was going to find Michael’s car flipped over or in a ditch somewhere and he felt himself actually letting out a whimper as tears filled his eyes.

He tried to push those horrible thoughts away but he just couldn’t.

Suddenly there were headlights coming straight towards him as the other car was leaning on the horn and Ashton flinched as he quickly yanked his wheel over to the right and went back into his lane.

He had become so distracted by the possibility that Michael could have gotten in a wreck that he had almost caused his own and Ashton knew he had to focus or else he wouldn’t even make it to Michael.

*

All the lights in the parking lot were of course off when he pulled in because even the janitors had gone home hours ago and the parking lot was completely dead except for one car.

Ashton felt his breath catch in his throat which caused him to let out a few coughs then he was getting out of his car so fast that he almost forgot to shut his door.

He ran as fast as he could to the car and peered in all the windows but there was no sign of the pink haired boy.

The windows were still rolled down and Ashton could literally smell the alcohol in the car still which made him close his eyes and become even more upset with Michael. He just didn’t understand how the boy could be so stupid and reckless like this.

He pushed himself off the door and looked to the fence that led into the football stadium and that was when he noticed that the door to the fence was slightly open. It was open just enough for someone to slip through.

He made his way over to it and slipped through it with ease and his eyes roamed all over the area in front of him, from under the bleachers to the snack bar but he came up with nothing. He knew Michael had to be here though so he continued looking. He would look all night and day if he had to.  
He jogged up to the front of the bleachers and looked out into the football field that was now pitch dark, except for the slight light from the moon and from the lights of the 24/7 Mexican restaurant that was off in the distance.

It was when Ashton turned around that he felt his heart stopping as he seen the figure at the very top of the bleachers.

Michael was sitting on the floor of the bleachers in between the two steel beams and he had his head tucked into his knees. Even from here Ashton could see him slightly moving and he counted that as a good sign.

He made his way up the stairs but stopped when he got to the row that Michael was in.

He cleared his throat to get the boys attention and that was when Michael whipped his head up and looked at Ashton with his blood shot eyes and messed up hair. He looked down right awful and Ashton got confused when Michael started to stand up, like he was planning on walking away. Michael wobbled a bit like he couldn’t even hold himself up and he even opened his mouth a little but nothing came out. He put one hand on the fence then he was leaning his back against the one behind him as he looked down at his shoes.

Ashton just wanted to run towards the boy and hold him but something else was washing over him as he looked at the state Michael was in. Michael did all of this all because of one stupid letter. He put himself and Ashton through hell all because of a letter that he didn’t even talk to Ashton about first. Ashton was furious.

“Do you any _idea_ what you just put me through?” Ashton gritted his teeth as he spoke and the sharpness in his voice had Michael whipping his head up and his eyes went wide “Huh Michael? Do you?!” his voice echoed and Ashton still couldn’t get himself to calm down.  
Michael looked so small as he looked at Ashton with hooded eyes; he looked like an entirely different person.

“I don’t…I d-don’t know what you mean” was all that Michael managed to say but it sounded like he had been crying before with how rough his voice sounded. Even the thought of Michael crying didn’t calm Ashton down though and make him want to comfort the boy.

“How could you fucking drive in the condition you’re in, Michael?” Ashton threw his hands up in anger then let out a breath but his voice stayed just as harsh “All I could think about was you dead in some ditch like do you even know what that fucking did to me?...not knowing if you were dead or alive?”

“M’ fine” Michael mumbled but Ashton heard him loud and clear.

“You’re fine? Look at you…you can barely even stand” at that Michael seemed to roll his eyes away and looked down at the ground below them instead and Ashton was getting even more angry by the second. He took a few steps closer to Michael then he was running a hand through his hair before he started talking, or rather yelling, again “You know, I’ve figured it out. I know why we have more fights with each other than we do with Luke and Calum” and that got Michael’s attention once again but Ashton flicked his eyes to the field before looking back at Michael “It’s because you don’t fucking communicate with me, Michael. You bottle shit up and think that you can just deal with it on your own but you just…you can’t. You never tell me what’s bothering you. Instead you do stupid shit like getting drunk and then driving somewhere in the middle of the god damn night”

“I can” Michael said sternly, as sternly as he could, but his voice still seemed so small compared to Ashton’s. Ashton looked at him and raised his eyebrows at the boys’ words though “I can deal with it on my own” and that had Ashton rudely scoffing at him as he shook his head. He was then putting his hand up and down in the air, motioning to the current state that Michael was in.

“Clearly you fucking can’t” Ashton shot back and Michael flinched at his words and Ashton let a breath and ran a hand over his face. His anger was causing Michael more bad than good right now and he wished he wouldn’t have let it over take him. After all, he came here to help Michael “Getting drunk isn’t dealing with it, Michael”

“But that’s how I always dealt with things before” Michael said softly and he almost seemed like a little kid with how he spoke.

“Well now you have us” Ashton breathed out as he felt himself completely calming down “You have three boyfriends that love you more than anything in the world but you…you gotta let us help you” and Ashton took a few steps forward so that he was only a foot away from Michael but Michael seemed to only push himself more into the fence that he had his back against “Please let me help you” Ashton whispered and Michael seemed to visibly relax at Ashton’s soft words. Ashton couldn’t help but reach out and finally touch the boy as he ran the backs of his fingers against Michael’s cheek and Michael closed his eyes at the contact “Just talk to me, baby”

“Can you…” Michael clenched his eyes shut and even in the dark setting Ashton could still see the tear run down his cheek. Ashton cupped Michael’s cheek to try and make the boy continue “Can you just hold me?” Michael looked up at Ashton with the saddest eyes he’s ever seen and Ashton didn’t need to be told twice. He basically fell forward into Michael with how fast he moved to be closer to him and he wrapped both arms around the pink haired boys’ shoulder. Michael wrapped his arms around Ashton’s torso and dug his face into the boys’ neck and Ashton could feel the wetness from Michael’s tears on his skin. Ashton moved one of his arms so that he could cup the back of Michael’s hair and slowly rub his fingers through it as he pressed light kissed to the side of his head. He felt Michael’s shoulders begin to move up and down as he gasped for air a bit and Ashton just held him even tighter.

“I’ve got you” Ashton whispered “I’m never letting you go” and Ashton meant that with every fiber of his being. He was never going to let these boys go.

*

The boys were now sitting on the cement under the bleachers where normally peoples feet would be but they didn’t even care. Ashton had his legs stretched over the steel bench in front of them while Michael was resting his head on his shoulder and curled up in a ball, so he could be as close to Ashton as he could and Ashton was holding both of Michael’s hands with his one free hand as it rested on his lap.

“You gonna tell me what’s wrong?” Ashton said as he pressed a kiss to Michael’s hair. Michael ended up answering a lot faster than Ashton expected and he also got to the point right away.

“You got into Florida State” Michael said simply and Ashton nodded then let out a breath. Those two words didn’t even mean anything to him anymore.

“I did”

“That means you’re l-leaving” and Michael seemed to be crying again and Ashton was going to make sure that that didn’t happen. Michael didn’t deserve to cry anymore tonight.

“No it doesn’t” Ashton said sternly, like a promise. That had Michael turning his head so that he could look up at Ashton.

“Well I…I think you should g-go…yeah you should go” Michael’s tone was so fake that Ashton knew it was a lie as soon as he started talking. Michael was now looking out into the field like he couldn’t even look at Ashton while he said such untrue words. Ashton was about to speak but then Michael was rambling once again and slurring his words “You need to take the scholarship…yeah you should take it, Ashton. I just want you to be…happy you know...you deserve to be happy…you deserve all the happiness in the world; you really do, Ashton so I want you to go” Ashton backed away a bit so he could look at Michael properly then he was squeezing Michael’s hands to make the boy look at him but Michael was clenching his eyes shut with his head down, trying so hard not to cry.

“Why are you lying to me?” Ashton whispered like he didn’t want to believe what Michael was saying to him right now. There was no way that Michael wanted him to go and Ashton knew that.

“I don’t want to be selfish!” Michael’s sudden change of tone made Ashton jump and now Michael was looking straight back at him with fire in his eyes “I want you to go…I want you to go to Florida”

“No you don’t” Ashton said confidently and slightly louder than before.

“Yeah I do! Stop telling me what I want! I want you to be happy and-“

“I am happy Michael!” Ashton felt himself exploding just like Michael was but this time he wasn’t angry. He just needed Michael to understand “I’m the happiest I’ve ever fucking been in my entire life; don’t you get that?”

“But you’ve wanted this scholarship ever since you were little”

“Yeah” Ashton chuckled as he looked straight ahead but he wasn’t laughing because it was funny “And then I fell in love” he was still looking away but he could feel Michael’s intense eyes on him. He heard Michael sniffle then he was looking back to the boy to put a hand up to his face and wipe away the tear. He felt warmness shoot through him when Michael put his own hand over it and kept Ashton’s hand pressed to his cheek. Ashton rubbed his thumb across the skin “I fell in love with three of the most amazing boy’s I’ve ever met. You guys have changed my life forever and it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me” Ashton jumped a bit when Michael dove forward and smashed their lips together but he didn’t hesitate to kiss him back with just as much passion. He moved his hand that was on Michael’s cheek and put it on the back of his head instead to card through his hair and Michael let out a moan of Ashton’s name.

They had to come back to breathe and they just sat there with their foreheads together as they both breathed heavily out of their mouths.

“Every word of that was a lie…except for the part about me wanting you to be happy. You deserve all the happiness in the world” Michael said suddenly and he was starting to choke up again “But I need you…fuck, I need you so bad it scares me, Ash and that makes me feel like I’m being selfish”

“You aren’t being selfish, Michael. I need you too” Ashton whispered back “Which is why I’m not going. I’d lose my fucking mind if I had to be that far away from you guys. As soon as I got the letter, not even for a second, did I consider going. I decided a long time ago that I can’t live without you boy’s” Ashton brought Michael back into a kiss and kissed him deeply, as Michael gave into him just as much then they were parting again.

“You’re…not leaving” Michael said to himself, out of breath as he closed his eyes and Ashton shook his head and brought both hands up to cup Michael’s cheeks as he kept pecking kissed to his lips until the boy opened his eyes again.

“I’m not leaving, baby” Ashton whispered “I’m yours forever”

*

The following morning Ashton was sat at the kitchen table looking over the letter from Florida State one last time and he chuckled to himself at how little it meant to him now. A year ago he would have never done what he was about to do.

The three loves of his life were across from him as they ate their breakfast but he could feel their eyes on him with every movement he made.  
Ashton smiled before putting both hands on the letter and in one move he was crumpling it and he heard Calum and Luke both gasp like they couldn’t believe it.

“Ash-“ Luke began but Ashton was just looking up and giving him a smile before he looked at the rest of the three boys. His eyes stopped on Michael right before he was about to speak.

“I choose you guys. You three are the only thing I need for the rest of my life” he said and he let out a laugh when all three of the boys were coming next to him and practically tackling him on the bar stool and holding him tightly. Ashton had made his choice and with every inch of him he knew it was the right one; he chose love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m done!!! What a fucking ride this fic has been but I’m so happy that it’s finally finished. I hope you guys liked the ending but I’m sure I’ll be writing an epilogue…I probably won’t start writing it until the end of summer though so don’t expect to see it anytime soon. Thank you to everyone who has stuck by this fic like it means so much to me cause it takes so much patience to stick with such a lengthy fic like this. I love you guys! Also I am currently writing a Mashton chaptered fic that I have about 10k on so far. I just wanna have a firm grip on where I'm going with it though before I start posting chapters but I just thought I'd give you guys a heads up. While writing this fic I realized that I really fucking love writing Mashton and I know I'll be writing more mashton fics in the future


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